Food is necessary, that there is no doubt about, BUT how many of us have ever stopped to consider how and why we eat the way we do? Has the choice come from us? By that I mean is what and how we feel to eat based on what we have been led to believe it should be? Is food our comfort of choice, our ‘go to’ when things get tough or do we simply want to avoid feeling what is going on around us? Whatever the reason, it is time we stopped to consider: is how we are eating truly supportive?
Over the years I made a conscious choice to begin to look at food on different levels – the impact it had and why I allowed it to rule my life and my choices.
Feeding myself was one thing, a level of responsibility that went without saying, but that level of responsibility was quite a watered-down version to that which I live today.
In the past, food was my ‘go to’, my comfort, what I chose over feeling what was going on around me. Never did I stop to consider how what I ate impacted on my body or me. Nor did I ever consider that it would dull my senses, stop me from being able to make decisions from a place of clarity rather than a place of overwhelm.
For me, overwhelm came because I was left feeling distinctly different after I ate to how I felt prior to eating. I found that I had a sense of clarity before a meal that I did not have after. I would often feel tired, heavy and bloated after a meal with certain foods having more of an effect than others. So I began my own experiment, one that only required a constant honest observation – to stop, feel my body, how it felt before eating, and then how I felt after eating.
How did I feel after particular foods? Did some foods have a greater impact than others? Did the quantity and time I ate impact on my behaviour, emotions and choices? There was always a lot to consider, and at times I would be on auto pilot and just eat, of course paying the price afterwards and realising eventually that it just wasn’t worth it.
I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me. The obvious was soon pointed out to me – the higher the sugar content, the more stimulating it was, or if it was more carbohydrates, then my body would be left feeling heavy, lethargic and at times quite irritated. My train of thought was also disrupted and my attention to detail was nowhere near where it usually was. Coping with life was always more difficult when I opted for food from a perspective of avoidance, convenience or habit.
Caffeine and alcohol were no brainers… they were the first to go. The impact they had on my body was obvious and so was my behaviour once they had been consumed. Other foods such as carbohydrates and sugar containing foods were next to go on my list. And as the awareness in my body deepened, so too did my list of foods to avoid grow.
The way and quantity I ate, as well as the preparation and storage of my food, changed and developed into more of a routine and ritual. The way I shopped, stored and prepared my food became an occasion. It was something I enjoyed – it was fun, there was no pressure, it was neither a chore nor a rush. Throwing a meal together or grabbing take-out simply for the sake of having something to eat no longer felt supportive or nourishing. My meals became about supporting my body to feel vital, not heavy or weighed down. After a meal, I still wanted to feel like I had energy, not like I needed a nap.
Ironically, I thought I had always eaten reasonably healthily, but looking at how what I ate impacted my body on a deeper level showed me that eating what I thought was healthy was not really ‘it’. I could really begin to feel the importance of listening to my body, eating what I felt to eat and allowing myself to feel how what I chose to eat left my body feeling.
Many of us have a tendency to eat food and avoid feeling how what we ate actually makes us feel. I know I never considered that food had such an effect on me, other than contributing to my weight or making me feel extremely full.
Eating became about bringing a deeper level of responsibility to my life and the choices I make. Shopping for food, cooking and eating food now holds a new understanding and a deeper awareness, an opportunity to bring the use of food back to a true purpose, one that allows me to feel what I need to eat, and eat what I need to support me to feel light and vital.
I cook what I eat, I love what I eat and I absolutely love how what I eat allows my body to feel everything all of the time, even though at times this can be uncomfortable and challenging. And yes, like perhaps most people I often get the urge to dig into more roasted almonds than I know I need, or eating multiple spoonfuls of cake mixture but the way I feel after eating any foods that do not truly support me is so much worse than the 5 seconds of stimulating flavour I may get at the time. So the challenge I feel within myself to not eat that food can be very uncomfortable, but the after effects of eating foods that do not support me last a lot longer than the actual flavour does.
Now the uncomfortableness is less uncomfortable. I have a marker in my body of knowing how I feel eating a diet comprised of foods that truly support and nourish me, compared to the feeling of overwhelm, bloating and exhaustion I once felt after indulging in foods that did not truly support me.
Sure, society may say that we need to eat a particular way, but have we stopped to question that perhaps society may be wrong – that there is actually a way to eat that supports our body to be truly vital and have a level of health and wellbeing that surpasses the current ‘norm’?
By Nicole Serafin, Tintenbar NSW, Age 45yrs
Further Reading:
Food Choices – From Eating from Taste to Eating to Nourishment
Self-Care and My Inbuilt Automatic Feedback Loop
Food Culture
I attended an exhibition recently with colleagues and we wanted to get some lunch, we walked up and down the food hall but there was nothing that we wanted to eat we all agreed the food looked heavy and stodgy. So we walked out to a restaurant that we had been to the previous night and had a meal there, it was more expensive but the food was freshly cooked and very appetizing. We had all agreed that if we ate the fast food we knew we would feel bloated and sleepy and we felt our responsibility to the customers who we would meet to be fully aware and engaging with them and we were it was a long but great day.
“I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me.” This is a beautiful recipe for true health and well-being.
Food is such an important subject, that gets little attention, even when we are ill because we feel it is our right to eat what ever we want, even when it contributes to our ill health.
Thank you Nicole, we can all deepen our understanding of how foods react in our bodies and learn from the experience so it can be seen for what it does to our wellbeing.
I am going through a time where I am looking at what I eat more and why and also feeling how I actually do not need that much food (or not as much as I have been eating! ?) it feels really good to do ✨
What food we choose is such a great indicator of where we are at and how we are feeling about ourselves.
I agree LE. There are it seems some foods that we really shouldn’t eat because our bodies just cannot process them and so stores the excess as fat in our bodies, so it’s no wonder we then feel lethargic as we are clogging up a finely tuned system.
Eating is about bringing a deeper level of responsibility to our lives as Nicole shares, ‘I could really begin to feel the importance of listening to my body, eating what I felt to eat and allowing myself to feel how what I chose to eat left my body feeling.’ The food we eat has a big effect on us, it is important to feel how we are feeling after eating during our day.
This is so common with many people, I can still feel tired after eating, ‘I found that I had a sense of clarity before a meal that I did not have after. I would often feel tired, heavy and bloated after a meal with certain foods having more of an effect than others.’
A great blog to read so close to Christmas when there is so much indulgence of food going on. It’s interesting to note how everything is made so easy for us – we can buy everything pre cooked or pre prepared. For me some of the most memorable times of Christmas as I was growing up was the preparation of the food, Christmas, puddings and cakes being made months or weeks before. And the clearing away and washing up on Christmas day was one of the rare times that my Dad and Uncle were seen in the kitchen with drying up cloths in their hands helping with the dishes. This coming together felt really lovely, everyone joining in and having fun after the meal.
Maybe the whole food pyramid thing should be turned upside down for what you have shared Nicole makes very simple sense! Those who want to put us on a diet that serves only the people in power when it is obvious it is not working when we look at the rates of preventable disease caused by dietary consideration based on eating according to a set of guidelines from a food pyramid?
I have found that it is way more helpful to be totally absolutely honest about how I am truly feeling and what I am really doing/choosing than it is to try to eat what I think is best. Honesty is always a great place to start with going deeper within.
I can see how, in a society where there is a massive amount of food choices, it is very important to have a broad and detailed education of the affects that different foods have on our bodies. And because we have the choice about what to purchase and to eat, this education must be all about empowering the person to be the authority of their own body.
The way I eat and what I eat really effects my day and how I end up feeling or not and this is so clear simple and well worth noting with our choices and the responsibility this brings to our lives and that of others around us.
The way I eat and what I eat really effects my day and how I end up feeling or not and this is so clear simple and well worth noting with our choices and the responsibility this brings to our lives and that of others around us.
What we eat is a great marker of how we are going in life. There are foods that we know well that will either dull us down or make us racy if we eat them and sometimes we choose to be dulled or made racy. The choice is always ours.
So many of us know that what we do doesn’t actually match with what is true. Rather than the ‘perfect diet’ what if we studied why we resist and avoid what we know is good for us?
My choice of food really affects my day – either lightens it or loads it up.
This is profound Jenny, and yet why do many people override this simple message from our body.
The vitality is the key isn’t it… Some foods leave us vital, and some foods deplete us… We just have to tune in and feel which is which
“… to stop, feel my body, how it felt before eating, and then how I felt after eating” – what a great and simple eyeopener to oneself.
I’ve been experimenting with food and I’m clocking how when I eat certain foods then I get crazy thoughts. I have to ask myself is it worth eating the food for.
It is very important to note and something I seem to be pondering on these days is the impact food and drink has not only on our well being but the well being of others around us eg. I overeat and feel bloated and lethargic, I may feel irritable from the choice to overeat – how am I with my kids when I feel like this? What is the impact- all of it on them? What do they get to feel? How does it affect them? etc, etc. Now I’m not going to beat myself up every time I overeat but I know that my every choice I make affects them And everyone around me and I wonder if I am truly willing to see this responsibility… and could this be the cause of the overeating in the first place!
“I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me. ” I can start to relate to this as I bring more care to what I eat, whether it will support me in vitality or dulls me and makes me feel heavy. Its a constant work in progress.
Our relationship with food, reflects our relationship with self. The truth of how we are within plays out in daily food choices. We need look no further.
“The way and quantity I ate, as well as the preparation and storage of my food, changed and developed into more of a routine and ritual” This feels like way more harmonious relationship to have with food. I observed the other day the difference between packing a plate with food because I was hungry when I came to eat and plating up a smaller portion with space and notes of delicacy – the food looked and was delicious to eat. The quality we are in when we prepare food affects how we feel after eating.
I’m actually noticing how I am very controlling with food and I am the one to always set the meals and buy the food but it comes from wanting to control what people eat rather than a true response of what is needed for the body in those moments.
Its great to explore how we can be controlling in what we eat and feed others. It’s a great exposure for us to look at the detail where is this controlling come from, what energy are we choosing to have this around us.
I absolutely agree with this; ‘Coping with life was always more difficult when I opted for food from a perspective of avoidance, convenience or habit.’ I have noticed how eating to cope with a situation and to avoid feeling really makes life more difficult rather than helping and that from my experience if I am upset then allowing myself a moment to stop and notice how I am feeling and to settle into my body is far more effective than going for food.
Nicole, what you are sharing here really exposes how we use food, this is an important question to ask; ‘Is food our comfort of choice, our ‘go to’ when things get tough or do we simply want to avoid feeling what is going on around us?’ I noticed very clearly yesterday that after a stressful event that I turned to eating, this did not help at all and made me feel bloated and actually made me feel even worse about the situation. Nowadays I very clearly observe how trying to eat to stop feeling really doesn’t work.
We often talk about drugs, alcohol and cigarettes as something that is harmful to us but if we are open to being honest food can also be as addictive, abusive and as harmful as drugs are. We only need to look around and to see the rise of illness and disease and the increase of obesity, diabetics and other eating disorders to see that we have issues with food that we are not addressing. So, the question is as you have raised Nicole why are we driven to eat the way we do, what is behind our food cravings? And how do we really feel in our bodies after we eat them? What energy are we in when we eat, what are we seeking to fulfill be it to comfort ourselves, relieve our tension from the emotions we are being run by or to nourish our bodies. Are we willing to be open to consider the way we eat is medicine for us or that food can be a poison in our lives?
This is a great article to get us to consider how we eat. We focus a lot on what we eat, but I find that how I am when preparing and eating food is really important. Sometimes I feel really hungry and start to pick whilst preparing. Other times I am full of thoughts of my day. When I am eating I can rush even though there is no need and when I do, I often find I am thinking of what I can eat next as I am eating. This is what happens when I am not present or appreciating what I am eating.
Our body will always let us know when we have chosen food that nourishes or does not. It is the willingness to listen attentively rather than override it with the comforts we have become accustomed to.
I love looking at food as an experiment. I’ve started to do this recently and when I was pregnant I noticed how my diet would totally change. I’m breastfeeding now and it has changed again, it is a constant exploration of what works and what does not. If I override anything – then I can see and feel the effects.
“Over the years I made a conscious choice to begin to look at the food on different levels – the impact it had and why I allowed it to rule my life and my choices.” a very healthy choice that would be great for so many of us to follow. I heard recently just how important diet is, in fact over 80% of current health issues could be dealt with simply through taking care in the foods we consume and why.
I love how when I do listen to my body in what it likes and doesn’t likes, as in how I feel after eating it’s not how my taste buds like it, it instantly has an effect I feel light and vital. The other way around it works too, when I eat to not feel it just feel numb and heavy or racy.
Its great how we can read and feel our own body after we have eaten, we get so much more awareness and understanding, when we allow our body to give us the feedback.
” there is actually a way to eat that supports our body to be truly vital and have a level of health and wellbeing that surpasses the current ‘norm’?” Absolutely and it is beautiful to live and feel how different this makes our life what and how we eat our choices and the vitality we have and glow with.
A lot of comfort foods really do dull us and almost send us to sleep. Why is it that we want to feel so comfortable anyway? What has gotten into us that we no longer want to live life with a spark and a fiery way of being?
“A lot of comfort foods really do dull us and almost send us to sleep. ” This is so true, the amount of times this has to happen to me daily was an alarm bell I had to look at what I was eating. There’s no perfection but a constant reflecting and refining taking place.
I was not diligent with my food the other night and ate a small something which had a small amount of dairy in it, which I have not eaten for about 7-8 years. And I woke up and could feel it in my sinuses and I felt tired. I was amazed. I used to eat cheese platters like they were never going to serve cheese again and rarely noticed any sinus issue (a weight one yes 🙂 ). It shows us how sensitive our bodies actually are when we choose to listen to them and honour them over that 5 second thrill of eating something that we know is not right for our bodies.
Very true Ariana, we pad ourselves with a layer of protection so we can’t feel at all.
In the past I would eat 3 meals a day and a lot of snacks as well throughout the day, I basically ate constantly. I now probably eat half the food I used to and I have more energy and vitality than ever before. It’s great to challenge all the beliefs and ideals around food and eating as in my case I can feel we simply do not need to eat that much food as it can make us feel so heavy and dull.
If we don’t get our foundations right with food – we will always feel like we are on the back foot and fighting life, eat to nourish and life becomes more intricate and purposeful.
There is such a responsibility in the choices we make to consume foods that heal rather than harm. For 5 mins of yum in my tum we are offered signals some time later that this is far from a gentle hum in the body.
Culture does say it is normal to eat as we do, for example in UK, it is a certain way but that will be different in China or America, essentially it is all the same however, becasue it sets the normal that is outside of our body. However our body knows and we need to listen it.
What is so beautifully highlighted here in this blog is the responsibility we can have in supporting ourselves to eat in such a way that does not weigh down our lightness of being.
Agreed Jenny, sometimes we eat and want to fall asleep, other times we eat and feel held by love and ready for what’s next. Whatever the feeling after, we’re the ones that can learn to cook and feed ourselves based on being light and ready for what’s next or not.
“I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me” – definitely supporting ourselves in this way is also what brings a sense of (self) worth too simply because you automatically care more or deeper, for something you have already valued and still value. The valuing aspect brings the vitality or zest we have for ourselves.
I really had a shocking day yesterday food wise, I really did not feel what to eat and just ate what was there or placed in front of me. I went to bed feeling bloated as the food I ate was obviously not what I needed and because of this even my sleep quality was affected.
I also have really noticed that how I eat makes a huge difference to how I feel in day to day life. It really can not be underestimated, and although that I get that we see it we want it, it tastes good, the how does it feel afterwards is something we too often dismiss. Being honest about that is the only way to change things for ourselves.
One Truth that is certain is that the changing of my body in its deepening of love affects how food feels in my body as the awareness in general has deepened. Always an inspiration.
I appreciate articles such as this, it is teaching me to truly listen to my body. Sometimes with a picture formed of reading such articles I have missed listening to myself. So it is always a return to the connection with me and also to my body that is precious. I love it. There is a deeper acceptance felt for myself.
Loving quality is the most nutritious thing in this world – and replenishes not only you but everyone else.
Brilliant quote. Thank you Michelle. and how true it is that ” Expressing truth, especially if we have been expressing the opposite, is most refreshing, clearing and vitalising! “
We focus on the what but rarely on the way – when this is the thing that determines what occurs in our day.
“I could really begin to feel the importance of listening to my body, eating what I felt to eat and allowing myself to feel how what I chose to eat left my body feeling.”
Food is just one aspect of life that we do not question, as a new parent i remember looking at the suggested formula quantities that were recommended for my baby and feeling it was way more than i felt was necessary and yet at the same time I felt a lot of pressure from the mass of external advice one is offered around nourishing a young baby.
Its so important not to get swept up in beliefs and ideals and listen to what feels true for you or another.
If we are constantly encouraged to think things over mentally we override the power of the bodies ability to know what will support us to be vital.
Food is definitely something most of us would go to as a comfort food; how many times do we see on the television or the movies people mainly women who eat tubs of ice cream while watching television after a break up of their relationship while the man goes to the bar to drown his sorrows in drink. Are we given a subliminal message to say it’s okay to do this by making it appear normal?
I love the idea of seeing food as an experiment and working with it not against it. There is certainly a call in my body to experiment with this at the moment, and keep on looking at what foods I know support me and what does not.
I agree completely Hannah this is an invitation to be a scientist of yourself, an opportunity to tune in, abide and appreciate the sensitivity that is our daily offering.
I have started to really see how much I will eat something when I am simply not wanting to have to feel the tension that is going on around them. I am now learning to express and call out exactly what it is I am feeling so I don’t compromise on the truth.
So many of us allow food to rule our lives – much more then we care to admit. By starting to look at the food choices we make we can start to break the cycle and free ourselves.
A beautiful understanding of food and the way we have come to use it in society today with the numbing effect of not wanting to feel . With the state of the world and what is going on everywhere it is not surprising but with the truth and clarity seen it makes all the difference and we can no longer hide under the mountains of food and escape as it is getting so extreme and illness, disease, obesity and eating disorders are getting beyond anyone’s tolerance to say it is ok. Making simple changes to how and why we eat and how we live as you share here Nicole is so beautiful to feel and know there is another way for us all that brings the truth and joy back to life.
Building a relationship with why we eat what we eat is very important for our mental and our physical health because there are patterns of behaviour that live underneath our physical choices that can mean we make choices that put pressure on our bodies rather than simply nourish it.
This is great Nicole, as it is simple to feel that our ‘train of thought was also disrupted and my attention to detail was nowhere near where it usually was. And may I add that not only can eating be in diss-regard, which causes diss-comfort and dulling it also creates a diss-traction that leads to a diss-connection. At the other end of that chocolate-coated stick we can eat responsibly as you have shared Nicole, which is eating with the ‘opportunity to bring the use of food back to a true purpose’!!
“I could really begin to feel the importance of listening to my body, eating what I felt to eat and allowing myself to feel how what I chose to eat left my body feeling.” food has not very often been my go to, I have other things that distract me. I appreciate your sharing as I am reminded of the responsibility I have to become more aware of how what I eat is effecting me in the quality of my being.
‘The way I shopped, stored and prepared my food became an occasion.’ I love this. Taking that extra care to everything food related feels awesome. Very inspiring. It took me a long time to be able to throw food out and to choose what I felt my body wanted for dinner rather than just using up leftovers. or having what was most convenient. Our relationship with food mirrors all other relationships and is very telling of how we treat ourselves.
Food for me as a child represented treats, something to look forward to, a Band-Aid for emotions, a reward for being good. I never saw it as a way to care for my body. It was like the payoff and the silencer for life not being as full of true love as I knew it should/could be.
Society is not supporting us to eat in a way that leaves our body vital and not heavy. It is trying us to snack everywhere and at anytime or to buy processed food which is too salty and will stimulate. We can taste food, sweets for free to let us buy it next time etc. We can buy soft drinks in large amounts. And we can make this list longer but the main thing is we need to love ourselves and feel what is going on in our bodies, how we can choose to come back and support the body with foods that are nourishing and make it about energy first.
Nothing better than home cooked meals made with love and care, and exquisite flavours.
It can be so easy to just eat what ever and enjoy it to the max and not really feel or be honest as to what impact it has on our bodies. The more we bring an awareness to this the more we can feel the tension and the uncomfortableness we are choosing for our bodies.
I like the experiment of seeing how you feel before AND after eating, as this allows us to ponder on what emotions or feelings led up to when we ate and hence influenced the way we ate, and then the after-effects too. There is so much to study about ourselves and our bodies.
Yes, Nicole, I find that the question of why I am eating very pertinent. It can be all super healthy foods, but if I am eating to relieve, dull or numb myself in my awareness, it is for self and not in the responsibility for maintaining a clarity and quality in my body that serves all.
Eating for me is a constant deepening of understanding for what feels light and nourishing in my body vs what I desire and need to satisfy my unresolved emotions. One clearly is from my body whilst the other is clearly not. Is there more to our desires than meets the eye?…
The reason for eating seems to have a lot to do with how we feel after eating. If I’m eating to cover up emotional disturbance or discomfort I would probably say I feel pretty comfortable after eating. The challenge is that that comfort isn’t really comfort, its the dulling of the senses so I don’t feel as much, at least for an hour or two. The bigger challenge is the original issue or disturbance is not being lovingly looked at, and so the cycle continues until it is looked at.
We really need to look at food from another level, an energetic perspective or we have no way of really seeing what we are doing to ourselves, if we emotionally eat or can not bare the tension of the opportunity to be more in our potential that is not about having a treat it has a deeper significance to consider.
Our main diet is energy – the food and way we eat is just a result of this. Make your choice of energy loving and true and you’ll be nourished.
I’m discovering that the steadiness of backing myself up with what I really need to eat requires a deep connection with the body that is deepening all relationships with time. This is more important than all the fitting in that society tells us we need to be.
There is a world of difference when we choose foods for comfort and to dull us down, as opposed to choosing and eating foods that truly supports and nourishes us. And how do we know what truly nourishes? Start listening to our bodies; bloating, feeling heavy and sleepy after meals, are some obvious signs.
That is the first step isn’t it… a level of honesty about how we feel after eating certain foods. I would have said sugar had a really obvious detrimental affect on my health and wellbeing yet I kept looking for it in the foods I ate so there is much to observe about our behaviour when we first start out.
I love the time devoted to cook my meals even though in a city of busyness there is always pressure to not allow you to do this. It is not easy. To cook meals sometimes it would be very late at night. But ultimately it is to feel which is more loving and surrender to the no perfection of life.,
Like so many aspects of our lives our choice of what, when and how we eat fits exactly to our needs for comfort, security and stimulation.
More than food and nutrition – everyday we consume and partake of energy – which in turn determines how every cell and particle will be. Instead of worrying about carbohydrate or cholesterol we have, we should focus on the quality we live life in.
Well said Joseph, because it is quite a game changer when we begin to focus on the quality we live life in, and as we do, we get the reflections and the lessons of what needs refining in our lives in order to deepen our quality.
When we feel ravenous with hunger do we ever stop to feel why that is and that perhaps there’s more to it? Great to bring awareness to why and how we eat, to notice what our cravings are and what’s the real reason behind them: what are we not wanting to feel, by dulling, numbing or overstimulating our bodies?
When we binge on food it’s not about self bashing but perhaps looking at why we’re avoiding clarity in that instant.
Last night i did not sleep well and in the middle of the night my mind was telling me to go downstairs and eat some coconut cream because it would make me feel better. I knew that even if I liked the taste in my mouth, which I probably wouldn’t, I would like the creaminess for the comfort it might bring but then what about afterwards when I would most likely get mucous and irritation in my throat? This voice in my head was very persistent and kept returning. I was going to throw the coconut cream away but realised there was another party that I had committed to making a cake for and I would need it later. I managed to get back to sleep but this incident made me realise that there are lots of times when my head is telling me to do something that is not healthy or wise for me to do and to be ever more discerning re the suggestions or commands I get from it.
I have not had a craving for food during the night, I like my sleep too much. But after reading your comment Elaine, the question that popped up was, what were your movements during the day, and/or was there something in your day left uncompleted or avoided?
I have been finding it interesting to clock when all of a sudden out of the blue I get the craving for a very particular type of food. And also what type of food gets picked in the different scenarios. I may not be consciously thinking about it, but it seems my spirit is very practiced at knowing very specifically what to pick to water down my energy or awareness in each moment.
Depending on our relationship with food it could be one of complete focus or one of being dismissive and not that interested. Either way we have to eat and what usually gets us the most is the stimulation the flavour and texture of the food gives us. We have made it all about that as opposed to what you are sharing Nicole that it can be about a relationship with our bodies and listening to what it is communicating to us when we eat and how it effects us.
As a society it really is time for us to wake up to the choices we make many times a day about killing ourselves with the food that we say we need in order to function, perhaps thats it we eat to function (at the best of times) and never eat to truly live.
We think we are ‘getting away with it when we can’t feel the effect of eating certain foods. For me that has been the case and it is not until I stop eating something that I can feel just what it was doing in my body, for example, stopping dairy some years ago I no longer get coughs and colds in the Winter.
I remember how I used to smother my salads in mayo, douse meat with tom sauce and put salt on and in everything but when we look at how all these things just add to the amount of dulling we get from food in the first place. Now when I eat salads I can really taste the sweetness of what I am eating and how my taste is far more alive than it ever has been and there also isn’t the need to eat so much.
“I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me.” I have been finding this too and the difference this makes is beautiful to feel and am meeting more and more people finding the same thing. I met a lovely lady the other day who at 75 told me she only ate one meal a day since she was young and working as a nurse in operating theatres and found that in order to have the clarity and concentration she would not eat before work and only on coming home in the evening and how this pattern has supported her her whole life amazingly along with the quality of what she ate to support her also which felt like a breath of fresh air compared with the eating habits in society today and the way we live in general and lack of presence this brings.
Lovely story Tricia. It’s true there is more clarity and lightness to the body when we eat light, and this feeling far outweighs the dulling that takes place when we overeat.
“why we eat the way we do?” – This question is so valuable to ponder on. There are thousands and thousands of different foods available across the countries of the world, so why does our diet consist of the foods it does, and how do we choose to eat these foods? We don’t all eat exactly the same things, and rather than simply accepting our diet the way that it is what if we were to explore how it could best support us?
I have seen a huge increase in the amount of times that people eat per day, it seems to have become normal to literally eat all day. This simply cannot be good for the body.
This is great to read how we can undo the auto-pilot ways we have bought into around food and just eating it. I was in the USA recently and observed the extent of feed that you can just grab and go – and it is scary to think that we don’t even stop to consider our bodies anymore – we just want whats convenient.
It strikes me that it would serve us all incredibly well to bring this level of transparency, honesty, experimentation and lack of judgement to all areas of our life; how we exercise, sleep, communicate, walk, email, drive…etc…
Unless our food choices come from us then no food no matter how healthy we think it is, is ever going to support us. The food that supports us has to come from our body and not from the mind or any other outer influence such as the media.
Absolutely Caroline. What may be deemed healthy by one person does not mean that it is healthy for the next. We have to learn to feel what is right for our own bodies and discern all the time if something needs to change. As our bodies shift and change, so do we need to adapt our food choices accordingly.
Today i know so much about what does and doesn’t support me, I can see clearly how I am eating and why, yet there is still this part of me that loves to come to the table and pretend that i know nothing, a part of me that wants to shirk all responsibility around food and eating so i can have that extra mouthful, pick that little bit more, a sly dialogue that can reason with the overeating or the snacking…..
Its like a Jekyll and Hyde scenario, where one offers the clear understanding of what will support me in that moment and the other wants to indulge and feast in what will not!
The relationship we are having with food, is the relationship we are equally also having with ourselves and also other people too. There are all connected. When i started to change the relationship I had with myself and introduce simple care and attention to myself and to my body, my food choices started to change too, and so did interactions with people, work colleagues and so on. I find the lighter (foods) I eat, the lighter I am with myself and others.
In no critique nor comparison, the fact is many people in my culture do not cook and they have never tasted or felt the difference of food cooked with the energy of presence or joy. We have not yet chosen to know there is anything beyond eating to survive. But of course we too are equally given the chance to learn with the messages from our body, and with the deepening of love and preciousness in our body we will start to seek for more. So the true and honest reflections are deeply needed.
I was all about comfort eating and cooking, I would do the cosy food for myself and others, and I was slowly becoming more bloated, ill and exhausted. I am still working through what it means to comfort eat, I can see that there are levels of it…I do know that if we are keen to change our bodies, our health, stopping eating is not the answer, it needs to come from the other end of the behaviour, the quality of our thoughts and how we are with ourselves first. If we truly care about ourselves we will not harm ourselves.
I just simply love after a busy full day coming home and preparing a meal or being supported by another with a meal, sitting down and eating quality food, having meaningful conversation and feel how this really does nurture me.
If the conversation is honest and evolutionary, it will support us to eat toward that…rather than eating to escape that.
Certain foods can create a fog around us and make it more difficult to discern what is true or not. It is also interesting that we often go to these foods when we specifically need to have more clarity. It’s like we have this strong willed rebel inside who constantly wants to distract us from being more closely linked to our soul.
A great question Nicole asks: When we get an impulse or desire for a food – where does the impulse or desire come from? Is it for support, healing, numbing or bludgeoning ourselves?
While we are unconscious about what food does to us other than giving us the energy to live life and the nutrients to maintain a healthy and strong body, we are at the mercy of our taste buts for what they like, but too from the moods we can be in that likes to nemb the body to not feel that we are faced with.
I too always thought I was eating healthy because I was making conscious choices on what to eat. But that was more based on a belief than on listening to my body. For instance I choose to eat biological products but because of an ideal, not because they felt better and more supportive in my body. Nowadays when you walk in a so called biological supermarket, they have the same products als in the ‘normal’ supermarkets, but now marked biological so we can have the idea that we are doing good and take care. But in reading this blog I do understand that it is about the quality we are in from which we choose what we eat. And that quality comes from the body and not from the mind that can only think in concepts or ideals and beliefs.
In a society that actually condones and permits addictions such as alcohol and smoking in which we can abuse ourselves with, we then seem all to easily disregard other addictions that impact our health and well-being such as our abuse with food. We certainly do self-medicate ourselves with food and I can personally vouch for that, and how this can continue even we are eating the supposedly ‘right’ or ‘healthy’ foods. It is all about the quality in which we are choosing to eat and what our intentions are for consuming the foods we are reaching for. The more we bring honesty in to how we are feeling in our body, the more we will become aware of the impact our choices have with the foods we eat and the emotions we are running with.
Indeed Carola, You can say that the more conscious we are with food the more clear we become and can feel what food does to us, to our awareness and to our body and whole well-being.
Have we entered the zone of more is never enough? We are offered sales of junk food our body’s don’t need, but our taste buds do! The plethora of drinks that speed us up or intoxicate us. And, the all you can eat food vomitorium. Where do these levels of self-abuse in dulling and numbing end? Could it be a simple choice?
A beautiful and supportive sharing of how we can chose to eat and feel from our body and the refreshing and aliveness we feel from this and our responsibility with it . This makes all the difference and brings a true quality and livingness so different from all around that is out there in the world.
I’m in the USA at the moment. In the past i would have jumped at the opportunity to eat Mexican and indulge in food. This time we chose to stay at a house and cook for ourselves, and we have been enjoying fresh and simple meals. It has been so refreshing to live this way – not making food the focus but knowing it supports the body completely. When we honour this, our whole days change.
It is true sometimes eating that little bit extra can have us feeling dull and lifeless. What I have come to realise is that there is a point when I have had too much food and want to eat to stop feeling something; never do we overeat because we are hungry.
Actually, when I am hungry I can often overeat but I can also overeat when I am not hungry – and I agree, that is most likely the majority of the times.
The dulling impact of food is really strong nothing to look at, I know I did not really consider it for a long time and I was exhausted. If we seek comfort and the cosy’s in food and not nutritional support that nurtures us, we dull ourselves.
When we make our daily diet about quality – we will see the truth – that humanity’s been consuming junk way beyond just food.
This reminds me of reading an article in a newspaper over 20 years ago, it was about food that was eaten as breakfast around the world, I never really liked breakfast anyway…at least what was on offer in the UK and I reacted and “thought yuck…you can’t eat that…” I wanted to cosy food that I thought was normal…We have a set notion of things, like, tea/coffee, toast and cereal here in the UK and we get stuck in it and do not question whether it actually supports us. I never really wanted to eat that and avoided breakfast until I got hungry and then get something stodgy from a cafe on the way to work. However looking at new ways of eating and considering that I can in fact feel more what to eat to support me helped me break free of convention and eat veggies in the morning if I was hungry, and I noticed that my dinner started looking like my brekkie, so veggies, meat fish, eggs, rather than the cereals and breads…I felt lighter, more satisfied and less buzzy because I was eating nutritionally more supportively with less sugar. We really need to be choosing for ourselves and not following society norms for the sake of it.
“Over the years I made a conscious choice to begin to look at food on different levels – the impact it had and why I allowed it to rule my life and my choices.” What a great view of food, not only on how it affects us immediately but why we turn to it in the first place.
I wonder if a systematic investigation of what individual foods do to our bodies would be needed?
I can’t stand the diet fad of one blanket fits all. We are all in different stages at different places in our lives and with our bodies.
Our diet certainly isn’t something where ‘one size fits all’, but what does fit all is a way of eating that nourishes and respects our sensitivities and relationships to different food.
The body gives us tell-tale signs which can be in your face obvious or subtle when it comes to a food disagreeing with us. Getting to understand and acknowledge these signs goes a long way to helping us with our health issues. One example I can give is when our nose becomes stuffed up all of the time, and at night it seems worse – for me this is a sure sign that something in my diet needs to be looked at.
Yes, or just feeling bloated and or lethargic after a meal.
When we eat more than our body needs it takes energy to deal with it and we feel tired. When we eat a food because we have fancied it, thought we should eat it, are being polite or for whatever “reason” we get tired because we have not been true to ourselves and the body has to muster up the energy to deal with it. All this puts a load on the body and after a while this gradual wearing down begins to show in our most vulnerable areas.
When we truly listen we know what truly supports our body though the question is do we want to choose this awareness and the clarity it brings or would we prefer not to feel all we do?
Foods do definitely affect the quality of how we feel and sometimes it is not until we remove something from our diet that we realise the effect it has been having. When I was younger I had a reaction whenever I ate dairy and my nose would run. Simple message from the body that it wasn’t sitting well. When it was removed my head was clearer and my body felt lighter.
A lovely sharing on the way we eat how we eat and the effects of what we are eating on our body our mind and our clarity of feeling. Very revealing to realise our responsibility and choices on eating and the clarity we want to have and what is really true for us.
Yes and the tension remains or comes back or gets worse but isn’t resolved.
The key is what makes us start with these questions? What needs to change within us so that we start looking after ourselves more and more?
“I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me.” Once we start to feel the differnet ways in which foods affect us, it becomes very easy to give something up, plus it is amazing how quickly it is possible to lose weight. It’s certainly is a lot less expensive thatn going on any specialised diet, and without the stress.
I’m at the point of being honest with myself about how i feel after eating food, and what the effects are on my body. And with this honesty to experiment, I am seeing more clearly and more instantly what the true effects of food are. Therefore I have a choice – eat it or not.
HM an amazing place to be in, where we get to be the scientists of our own bodies.
Interesting how you talk about malnutrition Jane. Something I have realised through working in healthcare and hospitals for nearly 25 years. We do see malnutrition, mostly in the elderly with the focus of those who are underweight. All of our assessments are based on this that is highlighting the underweight person for malnutrition and then we would refer to a dietician. I recall asking a dietician once “why would we not refer someone who was overweight or obese, for would they not also be malnourished?” She agreed with me, but the hospitals concern was only for those who were underweight. This bamboozled me for a while, but then I realised that these referrals would go through the roof if this was to occur.
We have mastered eating to avoid the awareness we have rather than to support it which is crazy when you understand what is on offer.
There is a responsibility that comes with awareness, which may be in truth what we are avoiding? Though this is crazy too as responding to life with our eyes wide open allows us to feel and understand life at a greater depth.
I do love this blog. It really highlights how limited ‘the perfect diet’ or the ‘ideal diet’ is and ‘you should eat this or that’ or ‘this or that is good for you’. Food and the way, why and how we eat communicates so much to us, but are we willing to see it?
I agree Jennifer, my experience is my food choices change as I do and also sometimes certain foods are needed and at other times not. It is our relationship with awareness that supports us to know and feel what truly supports our body.
No matter how good something tastes it is never worth feeling dulled afterwards. We think we like the taste which we do, but we have to also admit that we also seek the dulling. Honesty is a key ingredient to a truly supportive diet.
I agree Joshua, although I’ve pushed this many times in the past.
The ‘dull’ way outlasts the ‘taste’
“Now the uncomfortableness is less uncomfortable. I have a marker in my body of knowing how I feel eating a diet comprised of foods that truly support and nourish me, compared to the feeling of overwhelm, bloating and exhaustion I once felt after indulging in foods that did not truly support me.” This for me is the nub of it all with food. I do have a marker in my body as to how I feel when I am eating to support and nourish myself. To be honest, it feels amazing, and when I’m feeling this, there’s no way I want to eat anything to dull myself. But something will come along that pushes all my buttons and I’ll start eating for comfort and will then find it quite a challenge to stop. The key is to get to the point where the momentum of supportive, nurturing eating is stronger than the dulling, comfort-eating way. I am yet to reach this point but I do know how it feels, and this inspires me to try to choose to stay with me and whatever I’m feeling. If I stuff up it’s not a big deal any more – I haven’t failed, I have just been given an opportunity to learn more about why I might not want to feel what’s going on around or within me. Life is an amazing classroom with an endlessly patient and understanding teacher. The more I appreciate this, the simpler life becomes.
I eat very healthily in terms of the foods I choose, certainly compared to the cheese sandwiches of the old days, but I still eat too much. There is a non-stop kind of eating I do which feels like a compulsion of sorts, a kind of manic stuffing down remnant of my binge eating days. I know it will go as I develop more self loving ways. It bothers me a bit but I know that focusing on the food is not the solution and willpower is not it. The more I love myself and care for my body the more I will want to feed it only that which it truly needs and not what my taste buds and my mind dictate.
It’s really great to feel how not over eating supports the body to feel light and clear.
Society can often be wrong if that choice is not made from a connection with ourselves. That said, we are all at different places and understanding with our body and there is no right and wrong choice.
Nicole, thank you for sharing this; ‘So I began my own experiment, one that only required a constant honest observation – to stop, feel my body, how it felt before eating, and then how I felt after eating.’ I have been experimentimg with foods lately and noticing how they affect my body. I have noticed that if I eat more than my body needs then I feel tired and dull. And so I have been eating less and when I do eat I have been eating lighter meals – this feels super supportive for my body and do not have a bloated stomach at the end of a meal and instead of feeling lethargic I feel fine.
Today’s way of eating may or may not be true but it is definitely very profitable for many companies providing food that people pay for.
“Many of us have a tendency to eat food and avoid feeling how what we ate actually makes us feel.” i would do this daily, and in recent years with more care in my diet have come to appreciate the fact that I can’t but feel how food makes me feel.
“Did the quantity and time I ate impact on my behaviour, emotions and choices?” I have mainly been aware of what I eat and the impact that that has on my emotional and physical state though I have to say I have paid very little regard to the quantity of how much I have eaten and the quality of energy I was in when eating. I feel my next steps are to bring this to my awareness and take more notice of how these actions can affect me.
Yes, the quantity can have a surprisingly strong effect. Sometimes more than what we eat.
Our bodies being our best ‘dieticians’… properly qualified to advise us on what supports and nourishes us.
Putting the rules around food and meal times under the microscope and having an honest review of whether they actually support and work for us is a really cool thing to do. There are so many beliefs that we life under… it is important to be inquisitive for ourselves.
At the moment I am choosing to see a lot more and be much more aware of what goes on around me, but what comes with this is a get out by eating foods that dull me. In getting support with it, I can see how I go to the food because I am not expressing in full what is there to be shared. And this makes so much sense and is almost an experiement with myself in terms of allowing myself the space to actually nominate what I am feeling before I reach for the fridge.
“I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me” So true, i have found the same and the difference to the quality of my life has changed so much, and appreciating the quality and way of eating, shopping and preparing my food with the intent of this support is very lovely to feel and my whole body says yes to this.
For a long time now I have loved sitting and eating my meal at a table, ideally with conversation but ultimately giving myself space to check in and feel my body. It’s a daily dedication I am constantly working with as it is always evolving.
Having one meal a day, where we all sit together and share has been my normal forever and something that I really appreciate that my parents put in place. Its a great way to come together.
So true Natalie, its how we eat the food not only the food we eat that is so important to consider when we have our relationship with food.
The truths and ideals out in the world about healthy eating is quite bizarre when truly looked at and this is a great call to feel for oneself what and how food really effects us and our health, clarity and vision is and to not follow what is given to us by marketing sales and demand. We can change the trend by what we ask for and each and everyone of us makes a difference
I have definitely noticed the lack of clarity and sharpness after eating certain foods and the consequences in terms of what happens next in my life. So food is much more than fuel and has a much bigger impact on our daily lives then we perhaps realise.
The belief that we get our energy from food is nothing but an excuse to indulge. Don’t get me wrong we do need a certain amount of food in our day depending on where we are at but when we feel tired after eating could it be that we have eaten too much? Just as food can support us in some way, it also has the potential to deplete and drain us making us feel lethargic and lacking vitality in our day.
When I start thinking about food and looking forward to having a break at work to eat my dinner, I know that something is up and I need to come back to my body, surrender deeply, settle into myself and focus on the quality of what ever I am doing and deeply appreciate the tender and loving way I am with all around me. When I am with myself in this way those thoughts do not enter.
Considering how we eat brings in how much we like to distract ourselves, for example eating on your own, without the television or the phone for company, how often do we reach for a distraction, perhaps a book, paper or magazine to read?
If we look at the emergence of cafes, restaurants and cooking shows it reflects how much we are seeking to distract from the tensions we feel in life.
There are a lot of foods out there that can be considered ‘healthy’ – but who decides that? The fact is that if we truly listen to our bodies then eating foods that are healthy are foods that support our bodies. I’ve loved breaking the consciousness around certain fruits and vegetables being healthy when I know for my body they don’t support it.
I agree it is easy to just believe or follow the official food pyramid or some other information that tells us what is healthy and what is not but sometimes the intentions or sources of this diet information are debatable and questionable. Also for me it has worked much better to have a personal relationship of observation with food and my body rather than following information that comes from outside.
Well said Hm- even if there were truth in diets and traditional nutritional thinking how could they be right for everyone all of the time? Listening to our own bodies means we can develop a relationship around food and understand, as you have described, what truly supports us.
I am still surprised at times when I realise that a particular food choice which once felt great has become a pattern and that when I refine the choices I make I realise that it is no longer supporting me. So important to constantly discern what is required.
When I started to realise that there are far more and deeper reasons for eating then ‘hunger’, ‘social’ and ‘tastes good’, it slowly became apparent to me that there is a reason for every bite we take. If it is not solely about nutrition and evolution then it is always, bar none, about lessening awareness, connection and transparancy and protecting our sensitivity.
Yes and I know these habits well; it actually hurts to override my body’s calls for what, when and how much to eat.
I have decided there are definitely two energies living in my one body. As I allow myself to return to a level of awareness I once had as a child, there is another part of my body trying to sabotage this return and re wakening. As an experiment the other day I ate something that was sugary I did this because I was very aware of everything around me it was a very touchy feely experience, my senses were very heightened. But there was a part of me that didn’t want to feel expanded so I ate some fruit and within a very short space of time I had lost the expansion felt racy instead and then felt tired and sleepy. This showed me beyond any doubt that sugar races my body when I’m racy I am no longer aware and then as the sugar rush leaves my body I feel very tired and lethargic. My next question to my self is why do I carry an energy within me that doesn’t want me to feel expanded and have heightened awareness? Why does it want me to be racy all the time?
A very inspiring blog. I love eating in this way too, but occasionally when I get tired I find myself reaching for extra things to keep me going. This takes me on to a slippery slope of comfort eating and I lose the lightness and clarity of my usual way of eating. It can be quite hard to get myself back. But fundamentally it is a joy to eat lightly and allow myself the possibility of feeling what is going on in my body and in my life.
Everything we do is not about the ‘do’ but about the everything we feel. When we live knowing that it changes our understanding. Awareness of energy is the true currency of life.
A very supportive and real way of looking at society’s way of eating and what is really happening to us in the comfort and numbing food can bring us and how this has become an acceptable and all out everywhere acceptable way of living away from ourselves and our true health and vitality and feeling as our way of being .
I feel that a solid healthy relationship with food has within it an element of observation. Because with observation one can be honest and learn from patterns and behaviours and from there have the wisdom and thus the ability to change what is no longer supportive.
Each mouthful we take is a conscious awareness that we are either nourishing the body or looking to numb what is truly playing out for us in all aspects of life. There is an inner knowing that all the flavours that entice us to eat more has us retreating more from the vitality we can aspire to live.
Yes agreed, in that observation there is space to consider whether you are truly hungry or whether there is something you are trying to not feel. By allowing that space it supports observation and therefore awareness.
I watched a fascinating nutrition video the other day, it was interviewing people about why and how they ate, 99% of people said they ate because they were hungry or bored, not one person said it was for the nutritional purposes of the body. Food is worth considering because it has a much greater effect on how we feel than we realise, for example I’ve been experimenting with eating more fresher steamed/blanched vegetables, rather than roast or frying (my favourites) and I find I feel so much lighter afterwards and my thoughts are much clearer – and that’s simply from experimenting with how I cook my vegetables.
Great sharing Nicole, as food is something we all have in common, we need to eat to live but how we eat, what we eat, when we eat all affects the quality of our body and our level of awarenes, therefore how we are in life. Food is used for many reasons outside the simple purpose as fuel and nourishment for our body.
Food and ways of eating are an easy reflection of how we live our life, every day, and thus can teach us a lesson every time we eat; it is either a moment of learning or dulling.
Very true Alex, just by looking at our relationship with food throughout the day it can reveal much about ourselves and the way we are living.
‘Coping with life was always more difficult when I opted for food from a perspective of avoidance, convenience or habit.’ Crazy isn’t it that we ‘think’ it is the other way around, that in order to cope with life we have to stop feeling what is going on and one perfect way to do this is eating food that doesn’t truly support us.
True Annelies, it is how we are fooling ourselves, believing we are doing one whilst actually choosing the other. Could it be that the belief is simply an excuse and the choice is in fact quite deliberate?
Letting go of a pattern of eating food which we have chosen to avoid or numb out what we can feel and our awareness feels amazing and so confirming of the need to keep refining our choices to support ourselves.
It is beautiful to know that our own bodies can tell us how to eat, what to eat and when to eat by how it feels after the meal. We don’t need all the research and diets that pop up everywhere when we do this.
We tend to seek to formulate generally valid concepts of what is healthy regarding food, but we don´t make universally true and thus relevant principles the foundation of such concepts. We need to take some steps back from what we think is the best solution or answer and check our basis before we can make some really successful steps forward.
I love the refreshing honesty and realness of this blog and the lack of self-judgement in it. It has also been a great shift in me and my life to really begin to feel and understand the energetic effects that different foods have on my body, my emotions and my mind and to go deeper than just seeing food as fuel or a tasty treat.
‘I found that I had a sense of clarity before a meal that I did not have after.’ This is so great to recognise. We can pull ourselves down with food and it completely changes our day.
Put simply there are only two methods of eating: either we eat to feel, or we eat not to feel. Thereafter the menu is chosen by way of our alignment to either of these energies – the one that supports our awareness or the one that bludgeons it. Love or not-love.
The simple truth of the matter and the key to changing our food choices to be truly supportive. Thank you Liane, I will be remembering this as I make my own food choices.
Waking up from after a night’s sleep having chosen to eat something yesterday which was not supportive of my body and rather to avoid feeling all that there was to feel and I can now feel that my body has not had the same quality of sleep it would otherwise have had. Instead of a deeply restful sleep by body has been working hard to digest and process the food I chose to eat instead. Lesson to learn from what is felt in the body.
I’ve noted how the foods when i was a child, take for example breast milk, are no longer consumed as a adult simply because the body at the stage it’s at, no longer needs or requires that type of food in this case here, breast milk. Breast milk is no different to any other type of foods and observing for our own selves [over an ideal/norm] what foods do and no longer support our body is part of our own “growing up” and personal growth.
I am Chinese and society has told me eating our main staple rice is normal we only get our energy when we have rice. The more physical our work is the more rice we need. But why then do I feel like I want to go to sleep every time after a large rice meal? So I started omitting rice in my diet and so have some friends done the same. I feel much more energetic with this choice.
It is where the demand is. There are plenty of foods on offer that don’t cause harm. Is there plenty of demand for them?
Food and society’s way of eating is a masterclass how much it can be steered into a very profitable direction by food companies the moment they find food combinations (salt, sugar and fat) that are (almost) irresistible to humans. Health is a lesser consideration in this calculus.
Great comment Christoph. Our menu is designed by what is the most addictive and will have consumers consuming more and not what will truly nourish the consumer to consume. We could get up in arms with what we are supplied with, but then we would not be taking responsibility for what we are demanding. Thus it is we who write the menu and then rage at the chef when ill health descends upon us.
I have for many years have over indulged in foods. It is like a part of me does not want to admit I am eating in excess even though I feel so uncomfortable afterwards. You know what feels better than eating the food I want to eat is being absolutely honest and in the full expression of how I feel. The more I appreciate this abundance of feeling great in the body and accepting the awareness I have the more likely I am committed to holding this feeling.
Just even the concept of experimenting with food years ago would have been a moment where I would have scratched my head and say but why? Now though after years of just doing that and giving it a go and taking things out and then reintroducing and getting to feel the impact on the body and how I feel is fascinating.
Thank you for sharing how you have developed your relationship with food to be something based on quality. it is great to read the shift in relationship – from food being something that fills you up to food actually communicating with you how you are feeling and what foods support you at the time.
‘…compared to the feeling of overwhelm, bloating and exhaustion I once felt after indulging in foods that did not truly support me.’ this is super interesting – before now I had not attributed a feeling of overwhelm with food choices however this makes perfect sense and as I find myself in this position at times it offers an opportunity to ask why I have been creating this situation for myself. Thank you Nicole.
Lovely what you share as i have been experimenting with food too over the last few years. Especially with seeing how I feel before and after eating. I don’t have a problem with quantity as I have always ate small portions and my body just stops me. What I have been working on is how easy it is to grab a meal and not plan, if the meal I am eating is nutritous or not. How even a smaller amount of carbs can cause tiredness and take me out for several of hours.
When we make the link between what we eat and how we feel, we enter into the most fascinating scientific experiment on earth, the process of testing out our different chemical combinations on our very sensitive bodies. I never appreciated just how delicate and refined my physiology is until I began this process. Now I fully appreciate the finesse of my body’s chemistry and how I can either enhance its smooth operation or deeply sabotage it by the foods and beverages I choose to consume.
‘Eating became about bringing a deeper level of responsibility to my life,’ a statement that is unusual by most peopkes standards. Even when we become aware of the problems with eating the foods that don’t agree with us, like so many processed foods full of sugar and or additives, (or drinking liquids such as alcohol and coffee) we can still do so because ‘ we like the taste’. Then we are surprised when whole swathes of a population become overweight or even obese.
“Many of us have a tendency to eat food and avoid feeling how what we ate actually makes us feel.” You speak for most of society here, i know myself sometimes I will eat not to feel what is going on – love this blog and the awareness it brings to the reader.
Food has become a way of indulgence hasn’t it. If I think of my parent’s generation just after the war, food was not as abundant, but it was absolutely healthier and there was definitely a different consciousness around it.
Observing myself when, what and how I eat has been very interesting so far and as you write Nicole it is a forever deepening investigation. Honestly feeling the body before and after eating brings awareness and asks me to make different choices. Very simple: do I eat to keep my body vital and light or not? I can see I sometimes just not want to go to that level of responsibility. At least I know the choice ahead of me and my body reminds me of that with clarity: signals of lightness or dullness.
I have also found that my level of clarity is very different before and after most meals. I could write it off as just being tired after the meal or working on something that was a bit harder, but there is also a feeling in my body of clarity as well as my mind before I eat as compared to after.
I agree food effects the clarity so much. That’s why I am beginning to understand, that I really need to refine my foods and eliminate what foods are still causing me tiredness.
Food still rules my life, it’s kind of my ‘safety zone’ I will be eating one meal and immediately preparing for my next one, a bit like being out in the open and running from the to tree to get out of the sun. What am I running away from? My own light. I plan journeys to go past the supermarket so I can nip in to buy a snack, I prepare meals that exactly hit the ‘spot’ i.e. that are a perfect vibration to dull my senses, This doesn’t make sense because I know that to truly get on in life, to evolve, I need to feel, but there’s a part of me that is resisting, that simply doesn’t want to evolve. I know that self love is the key, so why am I abusing myself with overeating food? It is crazy.
Some brilliant questions in this first paragraph that we could bring to our meal times worldwide; opportunities to get honest and therefore empowered about our choices around food. Thank you, Nicole.
Our way of eating is not true unless we listen to our body. There is no point listening to anyone else, least of all society as a whole to gain knowledge of what to eat. Enforcing anything on the body that it does not need is actually abusive, so we need to hold firm in listening to what our own body is asking for without looking elsewhere for advice.
When we truly understand what actually sustains us, life becomes much simpler especially for our bodies,… Our bodies are always telling us what is best for us.
The truth is our body never lies, it tells us clearing, it is us who ignore the messages. We let our minds take over rather than going with the body’s feeling.
We need to start questioning what we have labeled normal to be based on what the majority does or agrees on or what certain concepts about nutrition, diet, healthy food etc define as good or bad; not because they are all wrong but because often not all factors are considered, especially the individuality of where a person is at in their personal unfoldment or evolution, their energetic state of being, their level of awareness etc, i.e. factors not just related to biological physiology but also energetic physiology.
Absolutely Alex, there’s more of a science to all of this therefore everyones journey is different, to where there level of unfoldment or evolution is energetically.
It’s pretty confronting and revealing how we will argue about the merits of different food groups but smash whatever it is down without even chewing it through. The way we do things is something we serially overlook because it requires us to change how we currently live.
This is a great blog to read and discuss, to have an understanding that food actually has a huge impact on our bodies. When I was young we ate what we were given – my mother was an excellent cook and we were always hungry because we played out side in the fresh air all the time. Of course we helped prepare the vegetables and washed everything up, all our meals were prepared from fresh ingredients. Now it seems that fast food has taken over and hidden in the ingredients are sugar, salt and other chemicals that affect the brain. And it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that the introduction of fast foods has had a detrimental effect on our health. But to be honest it doesn’t seem to me that anyone cares except the health services that have to cope with rising obesity in the population.
It can be so easy to snack, graze and eat stuff that isn’t good for our body when we are feeling tension. I haven’t yet wanted to cut this behaviour, but I know that when eating this way my body is dulled, numbed and doesn’t feel great. A wise person said to a friend of mine, that there has to be a value that is higher in regard for the body than the need to make the choices that don’t support us.
Everyone’s diet is unique to them because our bodies have different requirements and our level of activity varies each day. To try and prescribe a ‘one diet fits all’ approach is not considering how we live, and it is wonderful to refine what we eat accordingly so that it builds and supports us for the day ahead.
Brilliant point, Janet. This busts the myth that there is this one perfect diet that once found will solve all our problems. It is in relationship with our own bodies that we can refine and build our relationship with food, responding day to day, meal to meal, as to what will truly support our bodies and schedule.
We are constantly bombarded with advertising for food, through TV, with cooking shows and competitions, magazines, billboards – let alone on the internet where you can order practically any food you like and have it home delivered with uber eats – so you don’t even have to leave home. It feels like as a society we are constantly eating, grazing between meals on snacks. Our bodies do not need the volume of food that we are consuming, hence our growing obesity problem. It feels timely and super supportive for us to consider what is lying underneath our ‘need’ for food. I love the approach you took Nicole, to feel into how your body felt before eating and then observing the difference in quality afterwards, which makes it simpler to then identify how certain foods are affecting us.
Yes, getting really practical and honest means we can bust through some strong and long-held beliefs about food, meal times, diet etc.
‘My meals became about supporting my body to feel vital, not heavy or weighed down. After a meal, I still wanted to feel like I had energy, not like I needed a nap.’ – I love this approach, Nicole, it is so loving, practical and supportive, rather than how we tend to eat at the moment, which is more about the attraction of the food, how delicious it looks, irrespective of how it affects our body.
We forget that even 50 years ago Western food was radically different to what it is now, no packaged dinners, little take-away pizza, no giant sodas, no giant chocolate bars! Food was simpler, and we as a society were less obese, so it doesn’t take a lot of science to see what we eat, and what is now on the market to buy has to change.
Food is so easily accessible now and we don’t stop to question the impact, we blindly get caught in the desire to try and experience, not realising the harm of some of the foods out there.
I think you’re spot on that we no longer use food for what it was designed for: nutrition. Instead we use it to numb, regard and indulge ourselves. I find my approach to food as important as what I actually eat, one of my worst habits is to nibble food before we sit down to eat, this effectively means I almost eat two dinners and by the time we sit down together I’m no longer hungry. It’s a bit like food as instant gratification, rather than understanding it’s true purpose.
When you start to read labels of food it’s extraordinary how many different words there are for sugar in its various forms.
I agree Fiona, I am constantly finding so many things have hidden sugars, but ultimately it is sugar. The sugar industry has been having a great time, but this needs to be exposed and a change needs to come in.
I have noticed how I feel after a meal especially if I have over eaten. I feel dull, heavy and not myself, and what often happens next means I am less able to deal with situations with clarity but with reaction and drive. It is an awful feeling but it is only recently I have notice the impact food has on my body if I overeat and how that then impacts on people around me.
It we would listen to what society says, you could say we need to eat all day as nowadays you can get food everywhere, every time of the day, evening and even night.
It is not before we know how to truly deal with our emotions, stresses of life and internal unsettlement that we will be able to eat without abusing food for self-medication.
Hmmm. This is true and I have been able to access some of my more deeply seated emotional reactions and dysfunctional behaviours by not numbing with food and actually exploring what is going on.
Alex, yep, as I have let go of emotions, stresses of life my diet shift so much, my portions are even smaller than what they were. My body does not feel to eat much at all. I am working on exploring what foods in its small quantities actually are supportive and nurishing.
It’s really interesting to read through the comments posted here about our relationship with food. Thanks, Nicole, for initiating this conversation which is highlighting for me how much we use food to cope with life and avoid responsibility.
Yes I agree we sure use food to cope with life and avoid responsibility, I know I have caught myself when I check out and use food to take me off track.
I have found it a fascinating process feeling what ever I consume into my body and how it responds along with how that effects the quality of my being. I never ever even considered it had that much of an impact but once I started to experiment then things became a lot clearer.
Natalie the same here its like a ripple effect either supporting me to feel great or cementing me to feel really bad. Amazing how we get to change how we feel through our choices.
Something this article touches on is how our thoughts are affected by our choice of food, how much we eat and even how we eat it. This is a science one can only reveal for ones self when we are ready, but well worth considering, especially as today there are such high levels of depression, anxiety and overwhelm. Could the way for us to have the ability to live steady joy-filled lives be through what we choose to fuel our body with?
Usually we eat because we want to feel a certain way (or not feel a certain way) but not so often are we feeling (assessing) how eating makes us feel. Here is definitely some potential ready to be explored.
The way I eat now to the way I used to eat has changed dramatically. I work in hospitality and I would have a break and shove the food in my mouth as we didn’t have the time and as being a manager I would constantly get interrupted. From running around and being in the go go approach I noticed how much that effected my life. Once I started to not go into that and connect to me and my quality as i went around things started to change. I now wait till I have the space to sit and eat and I make sure it is a nutritious meal that has been lovingly prepared. Taking time to still connect with myself as I eat and not make it a function and about the flavours but also my body.
From a life of not really taking any notice of what I was putting in my body, to a time now where I can feel exactly what most foods are doing to me I find it remarkable. So empowering and really getting to know what works and what doesn’t. When cutting things out wasn’t so hard but it was the response from those around me. At the end of the day I could feel how vital, light and clear I was that it didn’t matter what others thought or try to say to me.
‘Many of us have a tendency to eat food and avoid feeling how what we ate actually makes us feel.’ – so true, Nicole. We use food quite purposefully for that very reason, even if we do not want to admit this to ourselves. Whenever I feel the tension of having absorbed energy from others around me, particularly in my old place of work, I would feel this urgency in ‘needing’ something to eat, even though I wasn’t hungry, and what I chose to eat would be absolutely configured to dull me, or stimulate me to distract me from feeling the effect of the day in my body.
As long as comfort is the driving impulse of our eating habits we will not be willing to change it for a true better but only consider so-called improvements that don´t disturb the comfort. To change eating habits we need to address our comfort habits.
I love this blog Nicole, as it brings so much light into the subject of food and eating.
Thank you for sharing the changes you’ve made as well as the benefits you are achieving along the way. I’m in that process too, and although sometimes it feels uncomfortable, it’s something worth to be lived for the sake of my health. It’s clear that first of all I’ve had to commit to feel my body and honestly admit that some foods and eating patterns didn’t support it. Only then I’ve been able to renounce to those flavours that taste good but feel bad, the renounce to some situations that are associated to some foods or drinks that affect me negatively, the renounce to the comfort that dulls my awareness, … that is, a commitment with my healthy presence in life. This is a commitment with myself and everyone, as the more healthy and clear I am, more joyful, vital I feel and greater it is what I can share with others from there. We are all really worth it!
Our relationship with food can be very unhealthy, even when we are eating all the right things, if it is a means to avoid what we are feeling.
Very true Janet, even with the seemingly ‘perfect’ diet that is hard to pick any flaws in there is more going on than simpy what we eat. We can easily use food to avoid what are feeling, even if the food is ‘healthy’ and ‘nutritious’. It is fascinating how we can fool ourselves into thinking what we are having is fine when we know it is not really supporting us. Even an extra mouthful can make a difference.
Yes, James, one mouthful of a healthy food in the energy of wanting to numb or dull ourselves, is the same as eating a whole plate of junk food. There is a lot for us to be aware of and honest about in the way we choose to eat.
So true Janet, it all comes back to being absolutely honest with ourselves and our body when it comes to building a loving and supportive relationship with food.
What I get from reading this is that we need to develop our own relationship with food, and do what is right for us, and that may change at any given time. It is always a loving work in progress and one that does deserve our attention. We have been hijacked and hoodwinked in handing over what is good for us or not to the food and medical industry.
So true Sarah, especially as much of the information offered is contradictory. It seems that if one follows such advice, then the feelings by would be that I eat this because a certain part of my body needs it, but knowing (from the information given) that it will adversely affect another aspect of ones body. One will be in constant struggle as to what to eat and quickly learn to negate the harm and focus on the good, then wondering why our body becomes ill. All the while totally ignoring how the body we each live in truly feels.
One of the truly strange things with ‘society’s way of eating’ is that the harm caused by sugar – it seems to be the main responsible agent for the obesity epidemic – is simply ignored. It seems to be similar to smoking in the 1950s when many, many people smoked and few people discussed the health implications.
Can’t help thinking that the fresh lettuce spring roll in the picture looks pretty damn good!!
Eating from the principle of how my body feels either wanting a food or having eaten rather than following a prescribed diet has revolutionised the foods I eat. I now enjoy my food much more, feel more energised, fulfilled, healthier and lost weight.
Eating from a prescribed diet is quite stunting. It does not give is The space to listen to our bodies communication of how much the body needs and exactly what foods the body is needing in that moment. This journey of connecting to and learning to listen is an unfolding one but one well worth taking. I can feel for my self that I have come a long way yet can also feel there is so much more to be honest about, to listen to, adjust and live.
So true Nicole… it is not so much the food we are eating but the way we are eating. When we are connected to our essence and thus truly connected to our bodies, the way we eat ie what we eat, how we eat and why we eat, is very different to when we are not connected.
‘When we are connected to our essence and thus truly connected to our bodies’, the way that we do everything ‘is very different to when we are not connected’. When we are connected to our essence, we are streaming God down to earth and when we are not connected to our essence, we are streaming a form of pollution down to earth, known as the pranic consciousness.
Everything – absolute everything matters and this process is a very personal one as we look and feel where we are at and what our body is calling for for us to honour. Super empowering.
It certainly is Paula, every choice we make is either confirming our connect to our essence or our disconnection. This is like a science observation on our relationship with food and how it is all linked to every aspects of our lives. For example, our relationship with work, people, ourselves etc. impacts on our relationship with food. It makes sense to view life as one and not in compartments or isolation because everything effects everything.
When we bring awareness to all the choices we make around food our bodies thank us for it.
There are many myths we need to dispel about food and today I am learning that my body is a very good source of wisdom about what it needs and what nourishes it most. When we pay astute attention, it becomes obvious just how many lies we are sold that are actually based on economics not on nutrition.
I had the most inspiring conversation with a lady today, she was suffering from an illness and she said to me, ‘no two people need the same foods, everybody is different so we need to listen to our bodies to determine what is true for ouselves.’ I said to her one of the surprising foods that I couldn’t eat was almonds, she said she had the same thing and we agreed that it wasn’t the almonds per se it was the way and quantity of almonds we were eating that was the problem causing us to feel stomach cramps or bloating.
Love this article. Food has much more to do with our health than we choose to realise, and seeing it as simply enjoyment is folly.
Yes, enjoyment at all costs and those costs are *very* high.
This is very true, I had asthma that needed daily medication from the age of 21 to the age of 40. All symptoms stopped when I began to change my foods and dedicated myself to living in a way that was more supportive and caring for my body. A refinement that is ongoing.
‘…how many of us have ever stopped to consider how and why we eat the way we do?’ – Why would we even need to ask such questions would have been my reaction in the past, a reaction that would have liked to simply dismiss the issue at hand and stick to my favourite foods and habits. One´s food choices and habits are actually a holy cow, well protected and untouchable, unless one allows for more honesty and or experiences a crisis that challenges the status quo. Only then will we be able to consider and honestly assess why we eat the way we do.
You make an interesting point here, that we may reconsider the standards or norm of what is a healthy diet as obviously there is much information and many concepts that not necessarily serve everyone equally or work at all. Whatever standard we may accept or adhere to as a base we may never stop checking with our body and listen carefully to its feedback.
“I cook what I eat, I love what I eat” and I Love what I cook, and it gets yummier every time I cook. So it is simple for me to over indulge in foods and therefore looking into what is happening on the energetic side of things has been a search of what is within me that is holding onto this way of existence. Claiming the absolute honesty of what was going on in my body was a start and then the observation so I could get to an understanding, which brought me to an awareness of my responsibility in the way I was eating were all key in me no-longer-over-eating!
This is very interesting Jane as just recently we have been making more of a point of making our evening meal more of a ritual and all sitting at the table and it feels like we are preparing the body for food instead of just shovelling it down as substance .
I heard a wonderful presentation recently by Universal Medicine about how important it is not only what we eat but how we prepare it and how we eat it, and that evolving and inspiring dinner conversation can help us to stay connected to our bodies and one another. It is great to consider these things so that food can support us rather than dull our awareness.
Thanks for sharing this .. yep what is the conversation like preparing dinner I can see how important this is or if we are alone what energy are we in.
When you consider how so many of us prepare food this is hugely significant. We are often in a rush, can’t be bothered, resentful, stressed, tired, angry, frustrated, unhappy etc. We are often sipping on a glass of wine to take the edge off how we are feeling and all of these energetic components are the unseen ingredients that go into our meal and therefore into our bodies.
In a way all my life i have had a love-hate relationship with food mainly from the innate knowing that food is affecting my body and clarity of thought opposed to the deceiving mind that wants to have satisfied certain needs, sweet, sour, salt, bitter, fat, gravy, fancy looking, fasting or just eat copious amounts but mostly to dull a feeling or to upper my energy because of feeling exhausted.
In allowing my innate knowing about food and its function to assist me in making my food choices, the way i eat has drastically changed. Instead of making the menu up in my mind it is now my body that tels me what to choose and what not to choose. I found the menu is not a fixture anymore, like what the food industry wants us make to belief, that you have to eat a certain variety of ingredients to have a balanced diet, but instead it is in relationship with what my body needs in that moment of time.
I am very good at not eating certain things but most of the times I don’t allow myself to understand why from my body. So there are no short cuts in our relationship with Food, nor with ourselves, evolution or any other person.
Food and how we eat is a huge consciousness, over the years I have slowly changed how and what I eat to suit what my body requires rather than following the typical food triangle or the latest fad or fashion in foods. And by doing this, listening to my body’s responses, I’ve found I no longer get the mood highs and lows I used to, I don’t get the tiredness in the day or after a meal, and I feel much lighter, vital and engaged in life.
I have found that too Rosanna and now I have experienced this there is nothing in me that would wants to return to that old way of eating that made mee always feel dull, bloated, lethargic, moody etc. but never, light, joyful, vital and engaged in life. Choosing what to eat nowadays’s is so much easier as I do not allow the temptations or misleading thoughts that disturb my body and way of being.
How do I feel before and after food – a great question to ask to start to clarify what impact the different types of food are having. And then the really interesting question: in what moments and under what circumstances do I actively choose those foods, i.e. that type if impact. This is not limited to food but we do it with all sorts of things in life such as thoughts, conversations and activities. But food is a great tool for starting to look at our strategies in life, since it is visible and we engage with it so often.
Reflecting on how we eat and I eat, it seems so apparent that we have not appreciated the influence that what we have over our body and conversely the influence of how we live over what we choose to eat.
I was having a conversation with someone the other day about how her family tends to plan their days or trips around food, and that they are more of a ‘live-to-eat’ than ‘eat-to-live’ kind of family. This is so commonplace, that the main event is a meal or time when everyone gets to enjoy some food, when there is so much more to explore about life that we may be overlooking with all of the attention going on food. A great example is travelling to other countries – often food is prioritised as the #1 most exciting thing about new cultures, but what about the PEOPLE and their culture, history and values?
Very true, Susie. So many people nowadays go from one meal or snack to the next and it becomes a constant fixation and a top priority when planning the day or a trip. I notice walking down the high street of where I live that almost every other shop is now an eatery, and this is an interesting sign of the times we live in.. where food is used to cope with life, to dull and distract us from what is really going on in and around us.
I know what you mean Jane. I noticed this when I did juice fast in my late teens and found how I would get hunger cravings around meal times but yet was not actually hungry as they would easily subside. It is like we have this mechanism which we have become so accustomed to that to not eat breakfast, lunch or dinner would mean the end of world. Yet we can all easily go a day without eating anything or say just dinner. I find I notice this when I am working and do not get a chance for say lunch, after not having breakfast and then not finding it a problem at all which shows me that I eat far more than my body really needs. So it then brings me to the question what am I getting from eating more than my body needs?
It is great, this point you raise about how food creates a change in how you feel. I absolutely get this too, and these days when I seek the comfort of snack-food, I am learning to stop first and ask: do I really want to change my clarity and state of awareness, can I afford to be less aware just now, what is being asked of me that I am wanting to avoid…etc. And it is beautiful to discover how this line of enquiry actually leads to getting a sense in my body that there is actually no hunger, but actually there is an anxiety and discomfort which I am trying to dull-out with food. So, I am exploring what happens if I address the what is unsettling first, and then see if the snacking-comfort-food is still desirable. Which quite often it is not.
I over-ate last night so this morning my stomach is feeling nauseous and bloated. In the past I would have just shrugged it off with ‘I had a big day and was just tired and hungry’, but now I am keen to look at the day and see where I lost connection to my soul which can sustain and energise me throughout even the busiest of days.
A very supportive sharing on the huge and important effect food has on our lives in so many ways and the real clarity vitality and difference we can make it with loving choices based on this wellbeing and not being dictated to by current societies choices.’I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me.’ This says everything and offers a real reflection to love and honour ourselves our bodies and our responsibilities.
We look at life and say ‘it is fixed’. 1+1 = the world we get. But we never question the ‘1’ we put in, in the first place. What if it’s the quality of this that determines all that we experience? Certainly food for thought Nicole.
Absolutely Joseph… it is the quality we choose that determines our world.
Yes, one of the issues is that this way of eating is quite cheap so will have few interested sponsors.
Society’s way of eating is hugely successful financially for many providers but signs of lifestyle-created ill health are increasing. This combination can survive for a long time but not forever.
I have been cutting out certain foods that do not agree with me and it has been very supportive. The body really does know what is going on.
What I am finding is the simpler my diet becomes, the more I enjoy the natural flavour of foods that in the past I have smothered up with sauces, sugar, cream and the like. What a joy to be appreciating all the flavours that nature so sweetly provides, she is a very good cook!
Absolutely. I so agree Rowena and the easier it is to feel what effect the different foods are having on us and how we relate to them.
How and what I eat is very much a reflection of the kind of day I have had. If I am tired or upset about something, there is still a tendency to overeat, but more often than not I am now able to nominate what is going on before getting to that point. This level of self-awareness is possible these days thanks to the ongoing support from Universal Medicine, to keep deepening the relationship I have with my body.
It appears to me, from my own experience and from observing those around me, that food is often used to self-medicate; to feed our emotions, to perk us up when we’re tired, to make us forget what is going on in our lives, the list is endless. Somewhere along the track we have begun to overlook the fact that food is simply to nourish our bodies and instead we are placing them under such strain from all the food excesses any nourishment is being negated; we are actually making ourselves sick by the food we are eating.
Even what I plan to eat I can use to dull my senses. Why? Because I’m already saying no to being aware of what’s there for me to see. By distracting myself with what I’m going to eat based on comfort and being dull, I have already chosen not to stay present. I’ve already given the towel in, said I don’t care or don’t know how to handle whatever it is, but what if I simply stay put and observe? Perhaps I’ll discover I can manage afterall.
Great sharing Nicole and yes it’s such a personal discovery our relationship with food. Being able to be honest and let our bodies show us exactly what we need is super cool and also what is not supporting us. Each step towards honouring ourselves and our bodies is worth every second shared.
Awesome read, thank you for the frank discussion on food and how we are with it, it really does need to be a personal and honest relationship we have with it, rather than trying to follow anything, we can feel what does and does not support us.
I used to be critical of people who proudly announced they never ate breakfast because I was brought up in the firm belief that we must eat three square meals a day. I have many friends now who eat no breakfast and some who eat no lunch either and just one meal a day in the early evening. This shows that all the myths we have been sold around food are wrong – we do not need to eat every four hours of daylight. When we feel what to eat our body can signal to us when it needs to eat, we don’t need to look at the clock.
“Sure, society may say that we need to eat a particular way, but have we stopped to question that perhaps society may be wrong – that there is actually a way to eat that supports our body to be truly vital and have a level of health and wellbeing that surpasses the current ‘norm’?: – agree Nicole, an ideal is never any replacement or substitute for truth – a truth that comes and is lived from one’s own body and from one’s own life [choices]. How we we eat, is a reflection of how we digest and consume life.
Even my age seems to have some effect on what I need to eat or not for I am finding now at the age of fifty that even though I eat a lot less that I used to if it is not necessary it goes straight on to my waist line even though I am still very active with a physical job.
I spent a great deal of my earlier life wanting to control my eating and lose weight. I tried one diet after another and knew that what I was eating was not supporting me but none of that worked and my weight yo-yo’d. My whole relationship with food changed when I met Serge Benhayon. The change had nothing whatsoever to do with controlling my eating but everything to do with reconnecting to and loving myself. From that place I naturally changed what I ate from my own wisdom and choice.
It’s an amazing process saying “yes” to your body, saying “yes” to feeling everything and saying “yes” especially when this can be uncomfortable or challenging. The rediscovery of food, cooking and eating is worth the transitional challenges because as you have described so well, and from what I can feel too, is that the joy and vitality of eating to truly support yourself outweighs it all. It’s just not worth the real discomfort in the body in order to have a false and delaying only comfort. Obviously, in the final analysis, we have to deal with the challenges anyway and id rather do it from a clear, healthy and vital body than one that is overstimulated, bloated, exhausted and dulled. A great read, Nicole. Thank you.
There are may concepts around that tell you what eating healthy would look like and the food industry is very willing to provide us all the ingredients we are told to be healthy. I now can see there are trends, for instance the raw food I do nowadays see in the supermarket but I am also curious what would be the next. This movement will not stop until we find the true science on food, that food is there to support the body to be the vehicle to work though and not to comfort and dull it.
How much do we just eat on auto pilot and not because we are truly hungry. It starts already with the concepts of breakfast, lunch and dinner, to eat at regular intervals because you have learned to do so, a concept that too is scientifically backed up so it must be good.
If we do not bring our full awareness to what and how we eat how can we possibility take responsibility for all of our other choices in life. When we eat to dull or stimulate the body to not be aware of what we are feeling in life we can lose the inner wisdom of the body to communicate truth.
The body constantly evolves and expects the same of us. To hold on to old patterns of eating is comfortable, familiar but perilous, especially when certain foods no longer serve us. Listening and responding in the moment is a sure sign we’re evolving with our body, not working against it and stagnating.
We don’t really think about it, but our entire lives are shaped around food – when we are going to eat, where and what. How can we have reached a point in history where one section of society is obese and the other is starving
Good question Rebecca “How can we have reached a point in history where one section of society is obese and the other is starving”. For sure there is an imbalance in the way we live that is reflected in this and possibly it is time to let go of all the old concepts and way of thinking and to become honest with ourselves first, and start to ask ourselves the question why do I eat, how do I eat, what do I eat, what are all the concepts on eating and food affecting me and what does the contradiction on obesity and starvation tell me can be of help to start with.
Eat a wide range of colours, make sure there is a protein element, or worse yet – make sure you get some carbs. It’s all knowledge telling the body what to do. What does the body say?
What a touchy subject this can be for many of us. We guard our food and our habits like we would a treasure, sometimes becoming quite fierce if another exposes a comfort related to our food habit. It seems to be an ever unfolding learning with food. There needs to be a level of love and truth lived in the body before we relinquish the grips it has on us.
It is most important to do as you say, Nicole, and take it slowly feeling your body and your responses to food all the way. In this age of numerous “healthy” diets it is very common for people to suddenly take on a way of eating that is contrary to their body’s needs. I experienced the joy of feeling light and clear when cutting out all sugary foods and carbohydrates and basically eating just fish, meat and vegetables, and occasionally nuts and seeds, but I lost a lot of weight and ended up under 7stone and bloated and constipated all the time. Being in my 70s this wasn’t funny, and I realised it was because I had made it a rule not a choice. We can only find that balance for ourselves when we are ready to truly feel what is going on and be aware of the energy we choose to eat from.
Eating – in the past I have been obsessed with eating… I would and still do eat 3 good meals a day and with snacks in between and I’d be thinking about the next meal as soon as I’d finished eating. I have several friends who only eat once or twice a day – I am not prepared to do that – yet. I am aware that I deliberately choose foods that dull my awareness (nuts) and stop me from reading because I’m so racy (sugar, carbohydrates and fruit). Every now and then I totally get that my way of eating is deliberate and specifically chosen to hold me back from doing what my body is more than able to do, but I have had the attitude that if my mouth or taste buds crave something then it is because I need it. But which part of me needs it? The Spirit that is trying to keep me small and individual or the Soul that wants to express through me for all humanity. So I’m experimenting this week, not a nut in sight and definitely no sugar and already my body is feeling more still. Our bodies do truly know what we need to feed them, far more than our brains do.
‘Many of us have a tendency to eat food and avoid feeling how what we ate actually makes us feel.’ I notice that when I eat certain foods, I become heavier, bloated and more tried. Often I choose these when I want to numb myself from something I don’t want to feel. Some foods leave me feeling light, nourished and refreshed, but then that’s also in part, to how I cook and prepare them too.
Is it society that dictates what we should do, or do we let our bodies do that? Firstly we are all unique and have different bodies that respond differently and are operating at different levels. Second if we look at the state of Society’s general health is that really something to champion or do we need to find a different way?
“Food is necessary, that there is no doubt about, BUT how many of us have ever stopped to consider how and why we eat the way we do?” – it’s interesting Nicole because the other day I was seeing how it is these days that more and more people are eating [anything and everything] whilst walking on the streets, shopping, on the bus, in cars and how rather unfathomable this would have been say 30 or 50 years ago. It shows how fast the world is changing and thus the state of our health and future as a result.
In our culture there is even a saying that when we feel full we are meant to feel drowsy as if it is the most common thing on earth. From young this is what we learned and believed. But feeling drowsy just does not cut it with work and it felt uncomfortable to not be able to function as well as before eating, so that saying and belief didn’t really make sense.
Overall I still eat what I want to eat even though it is extremely healthy. I actually love food shopping and connecting with everyone I meet when I shop. It’s bothers me though I’m aware I should not be eating snack foods the way I eat them. It’s because I am lacking true purpose at this time which is usually on my way home after work and before and while I’m cooking. When I bring the true purpose of knowing my next part of the day is equally important I eat to confirm this.
It is like we all know the impact that certain foods have on our body but when the energy of craving that particular food is there, its like we don’t care, that tension is so strong and we just want to relieve ourselves of that.
There are so many myths and lies out there about food but at the end of the day, when we really listen to our bodies it becomes clear which are true and which are false. Thank goodness we have one reliable source of wisdom that never lies to us.
The body knows loud and clear what does not support it! When we delve into the world of excuses, knowledge and research to justify our actions we can be blind sided by what we think over what we truly feel.
Feeling ‘hungry’ is a tricky one though, because I can be convinced that my body is telling me that I am really hungry but I have found that if I don’t stuff my face with food right there and then, then often my feelings of hunger will subside almost as quickly as they came.
I often cook 3 meals a day for my family and we always sit and eat together at home. What I have noticed though is that I tend to cook the same meals each week because it is easy and I don’t have to think about what I need to cook. It can sometimes be an automatic thing. But now, I am starting to feel more inspired to explore, be creative and playful with cooking. In my family we all have different diet requirements. So, cooking a meal for us all can be an opportunity to have fun with it and to be more expressive through the art of cooking. It can be a colourful and fun experience when I don’t allow time to dictation what and how I should cook.
Yes, and a reflection of how we are trying to cope with life.
I am comfortable with what I am eating and when I am eating. Now for how much I am eating …
Its great to stop and look at what we eat, as it is sure a reflection of how we are feeling from day to day.
Yes, clearly there is a different way to eat and the more honest we are with our bodies the more we can access that communication from our body.
I have observed this week, that my body is refusing to accept the way I have been choosing to overeat prior. That craving to make myself feel full isn’t there as I find my stomach can’t handle it. I shall keep observing to find how it unfolds, but I have to say this is an entirely new experience for me.
What a great shift and a great observation Rachel. The more we evolve the more difficult it is not to listen to our bodies when they scream loudly that they don’t want something.
This is an interesting observation Rachel and one I have been finding too. In the past and if i’m honest until quite recently to stuff myself with food was easy and quite normal, at times having “eyes bigger than my stomach”, and yet of late, and even though i still do enjoy quality nourishing food, i have been compelled to eat a different way eating more of an amount that my stomach can cope with and truly needs. At different times we need different foods, amounts, times of eating, and continual adjustment is required because our bodies are continually adjusting too.
That’s amazing Rachael and great that it is coming from your body telling you this for you to follow in your choices.
‘I cook what I eat, I love what I eat and I absolutely love how what I eat allows my body to feel everything all of the time, even though at times this can be uncomfortable and challenging.’ – I can relate to this Nicole, being precious about the food I eat does allow me to feel what is going on, in and around me, and as you say even though at times uncomfortable, not paying attention to what my body would prefer but instead choosing foods out of comfort is a much worse DIScomfort.
Caffeine and alcohol were the first for me to go, and as you say ‘no brainers’ that were given up many years before I started to question the widely believed statements such as goats milk being a good substitute for milk and Gluten Free being a healthy option for breads, cakes and biscuits. However over the course of a few years and taking note of what I was eating and the reactions and responses of my body, I couldn’t deny that even these options didn’t suit me – ie they didn’t support me to feel lighter in my body or how steady and clear I felt on a mental and emotional level.
Yes, Nicole, once we start paying attention to the impact what and how we eat has on our body, we cannot but have a more loving relationship with ourselves that just keeps deepening. It is amazing what the wisdom of the body can teach us.
Once upon a time if you mentioned having a relationship with my body I would have thought that was a crazy notion – and for how I was living it was compared to today. I took my body for granted and just sort of carried it around with me caring for it in the most basic of ways. I definitely didn’t have a relationship with my body.
I can honestly say, Nikki that the relationship I had with my body, was definitely uncaring and I would go as far as to say, abusive. I also just carried my body around with me because I had to. There was no super care resting it when I was tired, feeding it nourishing food, taking care with the way I moved it and generally keeping it beautifully dressed and nurtured.
Nicole, this is a great question; ‘Is food our comfort of choice, our ‘go to’ when things get tough or do we simply want to avoid feeling what is going on around us?’ For me I am becoming more and more aware that yes food is my comfort and go to, I catch myself feeling anxious about something or stressed and then it seems like on autopilot going for food to eat. What I then feel is tired and dull, for me it is to learn from this and to not go to food to avoid feeling and instead to stay with whatever I am feeling.
We not only know the exact foods our body truly needs to support and to assist us with our evolution, we also know the exact foods that dull and counteract it. The more honest I have become with my eating the more I can see that the foods I “love” is not just for the taste or nourishment but also because they may be filling my awareness of something I have been finding challenging and have not wanted to deal with.
We are masters of our own evolution and masters of our own devolution.
This is super interesting and I have recently noticed how the way I and others are eating can change part way through a meal, sometimes more than once, according to what comes up in conversation and how it is expressed and as you say Jane this happens due to everything that has lead up to the point of eating also.
That’s a very interesting observation Michael that shows us how we are constantly adjusting our reactions at any one moment to keep things at bay or to respond to what is offered.
I live in Hong Kong and although I can understand the logic of what you are saying, realistically and practically speaking this is not so easy. Most people do not cook here. It takes huge commitment to be able to make our own meals without a helper and keep a full time job. If we think about it, it is almost impossible. But what I have experienced is, no matter how impossible some things look like, it is never impossible when the intention behind it is evolution. Eating better and with more awareness in what and how we eat in a healthier life is great, but staying at wanting to better my life is a huge stagnation of energy, that eventually it is much more than how I eat and what I eat that has to be looked at.
This is very interesting Adele what you’ve shared. I have pondered on this before, that maybe one day in the future a majority of people will no longer cook at home but eat out instead because it is easier and may be cheaper to do so. This of course can only happen in cities and more populated areas where it is viable. With the growing trend of people working longer hours and perhaps have less time, going out to eat makes sense. So, it is interesting to read that this is happening in Hong Kong.
Over the winter, I must admit I have put on a few pounds, it seems the older I get the more my body reacts to even slightly overeating or under exercising but this just shows me that we have to adjust and feel what to eat at any given time as what was needed yesterday may not be needed today.
So true, what we ate yesterday may not suite our body today, every moment is a new opportunity to feel what is truly needed for our body. Same with portion size, every moment is a new opportunity not eating the same portions each time.
Its a good thing when our bodies become more sensitive – we can no longer just do whatever we want and get away with it, but now we are held responsible for our over eating or choice of different foods.
We eat food for us and not for humanity, not realising that our stuffing our bodies with dulling foods so that we can feel more comfortable in our bodies stops the world from feeling the gifts that we each bring, the true qualities that are in al of us, and the true beauty that we can reflect out in the world.
It really is for us to look at our foods and why we are eating what we are, why are we holding back the gifts we bring of our true qualities and beauty.
Yes, I can relate to this Carmel. Eating can be a numbing experience or nurturing experience. I am learning to listen to my body more and more instead of my thoughts as to what and when to eat.
This is really a great point Jane, and I have noticed recently just how much I have used even what looks to others to be super healthy (gluten, dairy, sugar, caffeine, alcohol, free, etc., home-made) food in an almost self-medicating way to not feel the hurt of various things that happened in the day (say, at work, for instance) or to not feel the responsibility of changing my behaviours after I have been pulled up by someone. It’s the timing of these choices and the amounts of food being eaten and for what reason that really makes the difference, and it is as if the final choice is already pre-determined by my reactions to other things going on to me, or by my response to stay connected and feel light in my body.
Great point Doug, and by looking at the shopping aisles and the options available, it is a clear sign that many of our food supplies are very numbing and loaded with all sorts of ingredients that can actually harm us. It doesn’t make any sense why we would produce and consume foods that would potentially have ill effects so that our food can last longer and also stimulate our taste sensations but numb our senses and even harm our body.
What I am starting to explore is the way I prepare my food is also equally as important as what I eat and how I eat. Everything matters, every detail is important when it comes to the science of energetic quality and integrity.
Beautiful comment Chan. Perhaps it is more than minerals, vitamins and nutrients that nourish us.
This brings a new dimension to nutrition and why we eat. There is so much information about food now that we can easily eat so called “healthy” foods that may in fact not be healthy for our body. It’s so important to listen to what our body shares as we are each different. For example, my body started to have a reaction to eggplant, so I had to drop it out of my diet. For others it might be healthy and supportive but it wasn’t for me.
I find that if I am rushing to get things done, I then rush the preparation of the food and continue in that same energy and rush when I am eating of it. If on the other hand I sit down for as little as 5 minutes on those days to reconnect and be with myself then the quality of the whole mealtime changes. It is not just the food we eat it is the way we prepared that food, how we eat it, when we eat and what we eat.
Even on a practical physical level we are told and given pointers that we should chew so many times and make an effort to digest. But do I do this? I do not. Too often food goes down like it’s headed down a chute! Seconds later it’s all gone and I’m looking for a new piece. This is miles away from feeling everything, tasting each mouthful, without a rush and knowing the bigger purpose to our meal – it’s all about supporting us to be love. Thank you Nicole I can see this applies to everything not just the way we eat.
I know this one Joseph. Your comment reminds me of the Sunday roast – it takes all day to cook it and ten minutes to eat it. Maybe if we did slow down our chewing there would be more appreciation for the food and the body would benefit from our efforts, and I am sure be thankful.
You say we should consider if how we are eating is truly supportive. I expect if you ask any binge eater if they feel how they are eating is supportive they will say of course not, it is awful, destroying my life, but I can’t seem to stop myself. There is something else going on here.
As I continue remembering to listen to my body, I am aware that different foods cause different symptoms in my body –
For example –
sugar leaves me feeling racy,
Gluten settles like a heavy weight within a very short time causes bloating and I want to go to sleep.
Dairy makes itself clear by a runny nose and the whole sinus area feeling blocked.
What I noticed more and more is people consuming something while ‘on the move’. Drinking a coffee on their way to work or eating lunch while walking. Eating doesn’t get the sole attention it deserves and we are not aware of the effects of what we eat and what the effect is on our body and being.
Yes I agree, and if we look at many of the drawers in offices these days we will see they have their fair/fare share of chocolate bars and biscuits. I have found for myself that if I snack when I am working at the computer my digestion is compromised and I am less steady in myself.
From this blog I get that when we say no to responsibility it shows up pretty immediately in our food choices. How we eat is a great barometer to what’s going on and how we are in the day.
There is a certain art to being guided by the body to eat what it needs – initially we can easily mis-interpret this as ‘eat what your body feels like’ eg. “ah yes, my body (aka my taste buds!) fancy yoghurt and blueberries… the calcium will do me good” – the reasoning has come from the generally accepted ideas about food. Yet the body would say no thanks to the yoghurt as it makes me mucusy, makes my eyes sticky, makes me need to clear my throat, the blueberries make me a bit racy and impedes any clarity and thought. When we build our connection to our bodies and start to understand its messages, the changes in what we eat are a natural progression of that relationship.
It’s so damaging to have so many ‘ideal diets’ out there as it takes away from the process of finding out for yourself what works and doesn’t work, and unfolding – as you’ve shared – your own relationship and refinements to what you eat.
Yes I can see it is very personal. What one body needs is not necessarily what another body needs and when we abdicate this level of connection and awareness we remain trapped in the constant searching for what is going to ‘fix’ us.
It has been revealing to explore my food choices and the rigid ideas I had e.g. that I could not cope without having breakfast when what I have discovered is that most days I feel much clearer and productive when I don’t eat before going to work.
This is a great conversation to be having as it feels like we are abusing our bodies with our food choices more and more. What you are offering here Nicole is the opportunity for others to stop and feel what their body is trying to communicate before they overload it yet again with substances that are not supportive.
The reality of how we eat in society today is very revealing when looking at our health, vitality, weight and presence and is really something to change in allowing our awareness and responsibility in life to open up and claim who we really are. Checking out and numbing with food is a world wide problem which has far reaching effects and the choice to change this is ours for now and our future generations to learn by and appreciate lovingly.
What a great understanding of food and how it really effects us by observing our body and how it feels and the sluggishness and lethargy that so often occurs after eating. The lightness, clarity and aliveness you share is very special to feel and honour and life changing as we change our diet and how we live, shop and prepare our food and how and when we eat. Inspirational.
I love this article and particularly right now the questions posed about what society considers the right way to eat and the opportunity we have to ask our bodies about the impact of what, how, when and why we eat. The latter approach offers us real insight and truth.
‘…I absolutely love how what I eat allows my body to feel everything all of the time, even though at times this can be uncomfortable and challenging.’ This is very inspiring and so the opposite of what I often do or see in how society uses food. What if I simply made it about eating to remain connected and aware? This would completely change how I cooked, ate, bought the food, the food choices etc.
We have become full-time consumers. Whether it is food, beverages or emotions we seek something to dense us down.
So true Michael we seek to constantly dense ourselves down, it is letting go of this seeking and claiming our true power and responsibility.
Wow Jane, I love what you’ve shared, it is all about observing ourselves, being open to feeling and seeing what is truly going on. Like many things in life, we can either use it to support us or use it to abuse our body. To be honest about our relationship with food is great and there is much to learn from taking just one aspect of life and observing it in detail.
If we go back in time and tell people say a thousand years ago that in the future we will have more food in the world than we can eat and we are going to throw tons and tons of food out each day. But there will also be a huge portion of our population who will not have access to food and therefore starve to death. Can you imagine how crazy this would sound? But, this is happening right now, in our current times. So, is our relationship with food on a global scale a reflection of our relationship with food on a micro scale? I reckon so, because if there is disharmony in one area then naturally there is disharmony in all other areas of our life.
What a differnce in how I am living now compared to the past, how I feel today when I don’t simply eat to avoid feeling but eat to support my body. Mind you it took me ages to let go of many food addictions! Love the article.
If we look at the health of our society as a whole I feel we have definitely got something wrong with how we eat and what we consume and how we consume it.
I agree Mary and I am sure most people would agree as we can see by the massive increase in obesity we see everywhere. However, the gross over eating and unhealthy eating which in many cases is completely out of control must be a symptom of something else so we need to look a bit deeper and be more honest as to what is really going on, and what it is that we do not want to face so instead choose to stuff our face!
A great point Jane. Conversations such as these are a great place to deepen the awareness that food can and does affect us. And through sharing our findings we can keep building our understanding and relationship with food and everything else around it.
Wow love this – if we based school education on this whole blog we would have a more productive healthier happier race of beings.
Over the years of adjusting my diet to truly support me I have noticed that you have to actually take a break from some substances to feel what they are actually doing to you. For instance, when people consume a lot of chocolate, sugar or coffee they are aware of the peaks because they often say they need whatever they are reaching for but often are less aware of troughs in their energy levels when the peak is over and the dip has begun. I know this because I too didn’t know the real effects until after I gave these things up. And I can tell you it was a shock to the body as it had been struggling with these poisons for a long time and giving them up was like giving up drugs. But I can also add that living in a steady way without the peaks and troughs is a much more settled way to live and so much kinder to my precious body.
Oh yes, oh yes, Jane. I can get a craving immediately after saying something or reacting in some way or doing something. The science is fascinating and opens it up way beyond the narrow view of eating just being the ingestion of fuel into the body.
Agree Doug. The math is not hard to do – You do not need to be Einstein to work it out!
“Never did I stop to consider how what I ate impacted on my body or me” – so true Nicole, and also, how that if it’s impacting us, then it’s impacting those we’re with too from the change in our quality. There is nothing that we do as an individual that doesn’t affect others too at the same time. So the way we eat, is the way we eat for people/humanity. This is huge to realise, to admit or to comprehend, let alone to live.
Yes Jane, I would say we have made ourselves masters in using foods for pleasure or to compensate for the adversity we experienced that day. But never I have learned to eat to be light and to be the vessel to let that light shine through. actually how I ate was most of the time completely the opposite.
I am deepening my relationship with food on a daily basis and found that it is a continuous learning and in which all the old I had learned about food just seems to be not true for me anymore but a mere glimpse of what food in reality is doing in us physiologically but too on an energetic level.
Often when I go out for dinner and I explain the waiter or chef what i like to eat and how to prepare it they always ask me what diet I am following as that is what they understand and can relate to. Then I have to say that I am not following any diet as it is not a fixture but an ever expanding relationship with how to feed my body in a way that is supportive to my whole being and not only satisfying my taste buds.
In a world full of the latest diet and food fad it is of note when we actually choose to eat in response to a listening, honest and respectful relationship with our bodies and how they sign post very clearly the impact of our choices.
Yes, so true Doug, I rarely see a basket of shopping with the raw ingredients to cook something, more often than not it is food out of packets with virtually no nutritional value.
Coming off sugar or overeating leaves me feeling on edge, unable to handle life and not that different to if had taken drugs the day before.
We are told our energy comes from food and that sweet foods give us an energy kick but I find eating sweet foods in particular leave me feeling really tired the next day.
Great point Fiona, ‘We are told our energy comes from food …’there are other factors that gives us energy that we as a society have not yet allowed ourselves to become aware of. When we are willing to be aware, we can begin to see what is true and what is not, and therefore, it would be difficult to lie to people who are willing to tap into the awareness that has been offered to humanity by God. So, in order to not access our awareness, we often choose to numb it, and food is the most common go to for this. It sounds contradicting doesn’t it? Because how can something that gives you energy be numbing, doesn’t this highlight that there are other energies at play that is not from our food source?
The high and low sugar gives us is actually super draining on our body, for it has to work so hard to handle the excess we force on it by eating sugar.
Above all we need practice in observing. After a while in my experience it becomes very obvious which foods are harming.
One interesting research results is that those women who follow Australian government guidelines for eating do not lose weight compared to those who don’t….
Food- how we use it and what we eat and even how much and how often has changed over the years. We are starting to see how food is everywhere, instant, more accessible, it is not about being seasonal or preparing – it is about getting what we want now. And in that we have changed our relationships with food – not as an activity we put time into feeling what is needed to eat to nourish our bodies, but we use it as a filler of what we like in that moment. So there is a huge opportunity for us to stop and take stock of re-inventing our relationship with food and not carrying on with the trend but rather considering our bodies first and foremost.
This article is most timely, I come and go with eating nourishingly, generally healthy, having given up caffeine, alcohol, gluten and dairy in that order. Sugar has been a sticking point because I crave the sweetness. I rarely have refined sugar, have bouts of craving fruit, or worse, dried fruit. When I don’t eat anything sweet I can feel the stillness in my body. Your article is reminding me to feel how I am before and after a meal. I have certainly felt lethargic after some meals, needing to lie down for a nap. My body is speaking to me and I need to listen
Understanding why we eat, the quantity, quality and the way we eat and how this affects how we feel is so important. Often we forget that the simple basic daily things like eating can impact our health and well-being in more ways than we think. In the world of energy, everything matters.
There is clearly a lot more to food than just something we fill ourselves up with to stop feeling hungry or refuelling the body.
I agree Andrew, and I am starting to notice other things we absorb in life that also affects us, like emotional drama, gossip, feeling judgemental, jealousy, anger, etc. and how they can cause havoc in our body. Food can play a huge part in how we feel in our body but the other energetic factors of what we take in is equally impactful.
“I know I never considered that food had such an effect on me, other than contributing to my weight or making me feel extremely full.” It is true we don’t generally talk about food making us less clear and aware or more heavy and tired. Most we talk about concerning food is if it is a healthy food or it is about loosing weight. What helped me having a steady and healthy weigh was making it actually about the feelings foods gave me after eating them, rather than focussing on a diet from the ideal of having to loose (or gain) weight which is the current way of having or coming to a healthy weight.
“Never did I stop to consider how what I ate impacted on my body or me” – Isn’t it crazy that even when we fundamentally KNOW that food has an impact on how we feel, our body’s shape and it’s chemistry, we are still often eating meals choosing to ignore this awareness. Since when was blindly eating food more important than our body, and our health?
I have been one to hold onto eating more than my body truly needs in an effort to keep myself numb and avoid feeling what I have been feeling. Indeed the marker of when I thought I was full was perhaps not truly when I have had enough to eat but when I was dulled enough to not feel what was going on around me.
Learning how to feel the effects of what I eat has knocked out many paradigms that I held about food and even meal times. The more I tune into my body’s needs the more my choice and range of food changes, some of which I am in total awe of. Having given fish a wide birth for over 20 years, now it is one of my favourite foods, a fact that astounds me every time I eat it and my body feels so great for having it.
The words ‘eating’ and ‘responsibility’ are not usually found in the same sentence, as with food we tend to have treats and over-indulgences and often use it to dull or numb our sensitivity to not be responsible, because we do not wish to feel the truth of something.
Eating is normally considered a period of “time-out” from the day, thus no wonder we throw away responsibility. It is the reward, the check-out, the time-off, the break from the day. We need to consider it as an essential and deeply integral part of the whole 24 hour cycle. Then we might start to address it differently.
I have been thinking about all of this and have realised that I have never in my life ever really discussed or been taught about the actual purpose of eating. What is that we are actually doing? What is the reason, desired effect and point of it? What are the relationships between food, our bodies, our organs, our functionality and who we actually are. There are zillions of discussions about which foods are ‘good’ for you, which contain this or that, which foods are harmful, carcinogenic etc…etc..But before all of that, underneath all of that…we never actually talk about how food can either support us or prevent us from the most simple of goals of just being who we are. Surely that is the most important purpose of all. If we start with that, and are honest about that, and whether we even want that, then i reckon the reason behind our food choices will become a lot simpler and clearer
Thank you Nicole! Inspirational for us all most of all myself!
Thank you Nicole. In my experience, following what society says about food and diet did not support my body but learning to listen to my body’s signals and messages I too have developed a diet that supports my body and day to day living allowing me to have much more energy and vitality. I clearly know when I’ve eaten something that doesn’t support, I get a heaviness, dullness, tiredness, bloating but without beating myself up about it, I take a look at why I ate it in the first place, usually not wanting to feel something or deal with something.
“The way and quantity I ate, as well as the preparation and storage of my food, changed and developed into more of a routine and ritual.” I’ve had that same experience, going from eating food to give me something that I felt I was missing to seeing food as a support and experimenting with how I eat and how I feel after I eat.
I really love this post Nicole, you tackle some really good issues about food, the way we eat, and how that affects the way we shop too. In the past I would definitely just buy groceries without the greater understanding you present here, the groceries were “”just food to be bought and paid for” as opposed to food that will support and nourish my body… and others too by virtue of the care I am applying to myself. It just goes to show that the more care and awareness we bring to the way we live life through our bodies, that all other aspects of life get a spring-clean too.
Nicole, having been inspired by this article I am experiencing this week with how much I eat and being aware of when I have eaten too much. It’s great to observe this without judgement, simply noticing how my body feels and my energy levels. What I am finding is that the more I eat in the day the more tired I become, whereas if I have a very light lunch or no lunch at all I actually feel much more vital in the afternoon. I have become aware that previously I was eating at lunch time at work because that is the ‘norm’ rather than because my body needed food.
Even though my body spoke loudly to me many, many times in my life after eating certain foods it wasn’t until I turned 50 that I finally realised it was time to ask what and why. Questioning what I ate was a great start to turning around my ill-health but it was when I asked why I eat what I do, that the pieces of the food puzzle began to be discovered. And it was when I realised that much of the time I ate because I was tired or emotional that the puzzle was nearly complete. It is still a wonderful work in progress with a few more pieces waiting to be discovered, but my body thanks me every day.
There is so much bombardment that works around eating healthy, yet the way we prepare food is a big marker to how we consume it. We can eat healthy but if we are cooking in overwhelm or exhaustion what is the quality that the body receives to support us.
That five minutes of ‘stimulating flavour’ is like a noose around our neck, it will not let go and even when we are sick to the stomach, with a certain food we still indulge or partake in what ever that food is, so how can this be? Could it be we want to check out and dull so we do not have to feel our essence? ‘5 seconds of stimulating flavour’ or any amount of dulling, stimulation or ‘avoiding me’ is it worth it? So our essence, which is the ‘me’ needs to be studied so we understand how we can be so easily led around by the nose and eat those foods that are not allowing us to feel the true ‘me’.
It is not just the food we eat, it is the way we eat the food and my daughter is brilliant at reminding me when I eat to quickly.
Food definitely has an affect on the quality of aliveness and vibrancy I feel in my body. It can become normal to accept far less than this clarity when we don’t allow the space, both in moments to reflect and space within the body to feel.
Such a great article and conversation about what drives our food choices. I love how you approach it as an experiment and let your body decide not your mind as to what was truly supportive. My food choices have also changed as my awareness to their affect on my body has been felt more deeply. Thank you Nicole.
I’d say food is a super weak point of my life – because I know how effective it is when I abuse it and therefore myself. It’s very inspiring to read this especially as I’ve started noticing that even thinking about foods I know will bring me down already has an effect. So how amazing would I feel if I got out of my grump with life and committed starting with choosing to eat in a way that supports me?! This would include dealing with and being honest about when I don’t want to commit, looking at why and being open to healing the hurts that are getting in the way, because I know I do actually care.
I also never used to consider the effect of the food I ate beyond if it would make me gain weight. It took for me to feel a strong reaction to gluten to start to question what I ate and the effect it has on my body. Now although I still buckle to those thoughts of eating extra dinner or snacks, I really feel the effects, which definitely impact my awareness, sense of purpose and clarity.
I’ve also noticed this too Nicole – how you feel whilst preparing dinner, or before sitting down to eat, 100% determines whether we overeat, eat the wrong foods, pick, overindulge OR eat too little. What happens in our day up to that point and how we respond to life has a direct impact on our relationship with our food.
It’s so true – we have the ‘Eat-well plate’ and guidelines for a ‘balanced diet’, but have we really explored all the options and ways we can nourish ourselves with what we eat, or gone for a template that sounds great but may not be true for everyone, or the best thing for all?
What became super clear for me the last weeks is the influence of my food choices and the impact this had on everything: on my work, the quality and clarity I had while working and also on every relationship. So saying ‘no’ to awareness it not something without consequences. I love the lightness in my body and the clarity in my head with eating light.
To bring a level of honesty to our eating is a massive change. In the past I have just eaten to fill myself up – but know i know why I go for certain foods – to make me racy or dull me – when I have an opportunity to stop and consider – what am i avoiding here? To have this as a sense check has allowed me to get honest with food.
This is huge; ‘Coping with life was always more difficult when I opted for food from a perspective of avoidance, convenience or habit.’ Most people would say food is their friend to stay in their comfort of ‘eating away’ their emotions, hurts or other issues they have to deal with.
Certainly food for me and so many is used as a way to help cope with life, a crutch or a support to lean on when things feel difficult. The problem is that whilst we keep opting to use food as a crutch then we ensure that we will always need crutches. However by looking at what’s going on for us when we feel the need to go for food as a support, starts to address the actual cause of our needing to eat. Awareness builds awareness and so slowly over time we start to be able to see our behaviours more clearly, rather than just being ‘in them’ and that affords us more choice. Eventually we find that we have dealt with the underlying impetus to eat and we no longer need to use food as a crutch. In fact we can throw the crutches away and skip through life without being a slave to food.
There has been a lot of focus and emphasis on how various foods can affect our physical health. But what is covered here about food’s relationship with how we experience life and therefore our expression takes that conversation to a whole different level.
Yes food has an obvious effect on our physical health but also has a big impact on our general well-being energetically, emotionally, spiritually… that we are only just starting to uncover.
It’s great to bust the myth that control and discipline is needed when it comes to diet and food. It is simply about making observations and then developing the self-love and care to discard that particular food from our personal buffet.
Eating has become something we ‘do,’ a tick-box to give our body nutrients – without feeling what is truly supportive for our body at that time.
I agree Paual, food has also become something that we use to socialise, to celebrate, to commiserate, to say sorry, to say please, to say thank you, we use it to win over other people, to impress others and to get them to do things for us. We use food to comfort us, to stimulate us, to entertain us and to identify us. Food has become an absolutely unfathomable fixation for so many. For many it is a complication and an obsession (be that not eating enough or eating too much). All of these things are difficult to see when we are still using food as anything other than the wonderful support for the body that it is. Used correctly food allows the body to remain clear and light, the perfect vehicle through which the soul is able communicate.
We can be quite happy to not look at our relationship with food as when we do it is rather confronting. It seems much easier to stay ignorant.
There is no dieting regime that can ever outshine the simplicity of coming back to stop and listen to what is being communicated from the body about what is actually working for it. E.g. how it bloats or feels tired after certain foods.
Oh my goodness -the mention of food and school – this brought a long forgotten memory straight to the surface another lid of a hidden Pandora’s box has just been exposed and flung wide open.
A sense of shock on realising how deeply established this routine was and thus continued for everyday of my school life from around age 5 to 16. If anyone rebelled, there was detention to attend after school.
Being marched in and out of the school canteen for milk break (no-one was exempt from this – one bottle of cream topped milk for every child, that was supervised to ensure it was all drunk).
Marched in again for lunch break to be greeted by the smell of stewed cabbage mingling with the aroma of newly baked hot jam sponge.
Queuing for our food that was then crammed and piled high onto the plate, to make us grow’ big and strong’, with the command ‘to eat it all’ to the ever droning Mantra of ‘waste not want not’.
And then, being watched and told to eat everything on the plate in double-quick time, to yet another Mantra of ‘how lucky we were to have food on the table, unlike those starving in the world’
And to end the routine, we were then marched out again, so that the next sitting could be accomodated and replay the same scene all over again.
Our relationship with food is such a huge topic and there are no right or wrong answers because we are all different and our bodies require different things. I was always one for sticking to fixed ideas about what and how often I should be eating etc, and what I realise now is that I was not taking responsibility for feeling my body there and then in the moment and discerning what is actually true for me.
This is the problem with food isn’t it… having fixed ideas about what is ‘healthy’ to eat. What works for one doesn’t work for all. Sometimes, it’s not what we eat it, but how we prepare it and how we eat it that can make the difference. But I do accept that we all know too much fast food, too much sugar and sweet things, like cake, really don’t support us to feel vital and vibrant.
Great comment Janet, this is why dieting books and dieting regimes often doesn’t work because the most powerful diet we can go onto is by listening to our body. It will guide us as to how much, the timing and the types of food it needs. We have become so desensitised from our body that we often rely on outside sources to guide us and in most case it is not always supportive.
Yes, what is often missing is respect and humility in our relationships with our bodies; a dismissal that keeps us at arm’s length from some very real and honest reflections and insight.
” Sure, society may say that we need to eat a particular way, but has anyone ever stopped to question that perhaps society may be wrong ”
When one looks at the health of society, one would have to say there must be something wrong with what and how we eat.
And we can re-write the ‘rules’ about our diet by building a quiet, reflective and honest dialogue with our bodies and how they feel around our food choices.
Nicole your sharing just highlights how our food choices are never about our food. We are all ‘master chefs’ knowing exactly what to eat, how much and why avoid or numb feeling what is going on or dulling the clarity we can feel or like yourself to continue to deepen the clarity that we can feel. I recall someone saying to me a while ago that food and diet was a controversial area and they were correct. We see food as the holy grail of wellness, but we are not even scratching the surface of how we use food and how masterful we are at it.
Air, water, food…the basics we need for life on this planet. It makes sense that the quality of our life will be dependent on the quality of these three ingredients. Our relationship with breathing drinking and eating is the foundation of our health and a reflection of the relationship we have with ourselves. The wonderful thing is that when we start this process of listening to what our body needs and wants and discovering what really nurtures and nourishes us, it is as if our body wakes up like the sleeping beauty it is and begins to enjoy being alive – we enjoy life more as we find our own way through the miasma that we have allowed up until this point.
A very good point Richard. This would be a true form of education.
I too had never considered that how I ate could have such an impact on my body Nicole, but since I have become aware of this, along with what I eat and how it also affects me, the messages come through very quickly and clearly so that it makes changing my habits around food much simpler to address.
I used to swear by breakfast every day and would never leave for work without, telling myself it was the most important meal of the day. However, I realized that if I really tune into my body, I don’t actually feel hungry then, so consequently had to re-examine my attitude. What a breakthrough in realizing that what I was actually eating was a false assumption!
A child of family recently returned to the UK after living in Kenya for seven years walks into a supermarket and exclaimed, “Thirty types of cheese!’. Important to remember relationship with food differs according to where we live in the world. In some African and other countries supermarkets exist, but most food is sold in street markets. Food is not marketed to the extent it is in affluent countries, nor is it over-indulged.
This article is asking us to look underneath our preconceived ideals and beliefs around food, along with everything we have been taught and begin a relationship with our body like none we have had before. The honesty that we get presented with if we choose to do this will astound us. Both in what we need to eat, how much and how often. There is much we can do to support our health and wellbeing, it just takes a willingness to begin to explore this for ourselves.
What is shared here is a vital ingredient if, as a humanity, we want to begin to address the absolutely shocking statistics of illness and disease that we now face.
I have noticed that food is no different to drugs in that it can be used to numb, stimulate or tranquillise depending on the medication required to avoid feeling or looking at something.
Our relationship with food keeps evolving if we continue to evolve. It has to, as nothing can get left behind in every area of our lives if we are committed to our growth and the evolution of the universe.
A big part of being honest about food and its affects, is in actually wanting to feel and be in connection with one’s body as this brings a whole level of communication that can be dulled-out by certain foods. So in my experiments I have found that the want to re-connect has to come first, otherwise it is just my mind playing with food and so no real learning takes place.
I agree, Shami. If we look at our relationship with food from a deep connection to ourselves, we will learn a lot from our body about what it requires to be fit for life.
Nicole, I love your very simple experiment; ‘So I began my own experiment, one that only required a constant honest observation – to stop, feel my body, how it felt before eating, and then how I felt after eating.’ Taking a moment to really observe this feels great and will allow us to really notice the impact of certain foods on our energy levels and the effects they have in our bodies.
It makes complete sense that food is needed to nourish and support the body to feel vital and well. It doesn’t make sense that we over consume, over eat and dull the body with food to make ourselves ill. We have turned our tonic into poison.
Absolutely it is literally lunacy that we find ourselves in the western world. How we can be so extreme and in utter disregard and abhorrence to nature is really horrific.
Is it not so that a lot of us are following a special diet because this is the new trend or especially healthy??? Your amazing blog Nicole opens a door to observe our relationship with food and to look at it in a different way. I like it to find out what my body needs to eat and not what I think I need to eat. Is it sometimes challenging to eat like this – yes – but as you so wonderful described it is absolutely worth it
Those of us that have the privilege of easy access to food have gone completely and utterly mad about it. Our supermarket shelves groan under the sheer weight of our products, the choices that we now have in each food group is utterly ridiculous, especially snacks! The availability of food is past prolific, certainly in cities and in most towns, it’s not possible to go anywhere or do anything that does not include the option of food. And so, with the understanding that most of us use food to interfere with how we’re feeling, it means that we have easy and unlimited access to being able to distort the way that we’re feeling
and so how on earth do any of us truly know how we’re feeling, if we’re permanently distorting it? On top of all of this, the manufacturers of many foods have used certain combinations (like sweet with salty) to ensure that our bodies start to crave certain foods. Trying to battle against food by going head on with it, is doomed to fail, the only true solution is to systematically work on how we’re feeling, so that gradually (and it is a very gradual process), over time, we begin to feel so incredible that we don’t want to interfere with it in any way.
Yes it is obvious that food is given the hard sell and that it is a commodity these days and that there are industries cashing in on the populations obsession with it.
That is the key, I was with someone for lunch and they were really insistent to make sure there was no sugar in the dressing and just as I was thinking how pedantic she exclaimed, ‘I just feel so good I don’t want to ruin it’ wow I thought I have never thought that. How cool was she to want to homie herself so much. I learnt a lot in that moment.
Nicole, in a world that is absolutely obsessed with food, this is a very important discussion to have. From my own experience I would say that the majority of us use food for no other purpose other than to anaesthetise ourselves. We mistakenly think our urge to eat comes from hunger but most of the time it comes from a hungry desire to not feel whatever it is that’s going on for us. It’s as if the physical act of swallowing has the ability to push down whatever’s coming up (all be it temporarily). What I have found however, is that by gradually choosing to look at the things in life that make me uncomfortable, my need to medicate through food has almost completely dropped away and my relationship with food is now one of mutual support.
We like to make life about the ‘what’ – what job, what partner, what car, what food, but very rarely do we consider the how. It’s the quality we choose to live in that changes everything. Thank you Nicole.
I have always had an interesting relationship with food. I have found often I can go into eating the same thing because it brings a form of comfort and consistency yet may not really be supporting me to continue evolving – essentially I find I can use food to stay stuck where I am.
We generally eat to avoid feeling life; we eat to opt out and create a niche of bloated and uncomfortable comfort where we park ourselves a little to the side and opt out of the traffic for a while, until the next snack or meal that is. Just so we don’t need or more precisely, we physically and mentally can’t join in again. But how can we not be part of something that we are inextricably a part of? Well, by eating more and more often we can pretend at least … but is it worth it?
If I’m honest, I eat to much as there is some sort of comfort, even in the uncomfortableness, in the heaviness. It’s like putting the blinkers on for a moment and turning life down to a level that is manageable.
Food has far more impact on our daily well being than many would care to admit. It’s a long journey our addiction to food, but one that we reap the rewards of as the journey progresses.
This is such a supportive blog Nicole. There’s nothing more powerful than sharing from our own lived experience. It’s inspiring and empowering.
It’s definitely a conversation worth having as we seem to be consuming more in the way of food and also at the same time wasting huge amounts of food.
“After a meal, I still wanted to feel like I had energy, not like I needed a nap.” A key turning point for me in realising that if I continued on my then trajectory I was lining myself up for Diabetes. Learning to feel how food makes me feel has and continues to be the best dietary advice I have ever followed. Consequently I too have ditched alcohol, carbs, sugar, milk, caffeine plus a few other things. I feel like a million dollars and hence the need to comfort eat has completely dissolved.
Agree Doug, the more we have articles out in the world about ways to be with food that deepens our understanding of the impact of not just what is consumed but why and what emotion we may be avoiding. Very sensitive people are often ill equipped to deal with how much they feel around themselves and then eat to dull themselves as a very basic example.
Our ‘best diet’ is a very personal thing, no-one can tell you what is best for you but your very own body. Fortunately it speaks a very clear language.
Nicole, I reakon we just need to look around our communities to see that society is most definitely not on track when it comes to the foods we consume and the impact on everyone’s bodies.
In the past I had many physical problems and illnesses but it never occurred to me they could be connected to the foods I ate. When I was forced to stop and in the space that came from that got to observe how my body responded or reacted to the foods I ate, I was blown away by how much is communicated. Feeling tired, bloated, stomach or belly aches, headache, lethargic, racy, chaotic, emotional and even feeling pain in my limbs…after a long period of observation and slowly eliminating I was able to connect it all to what I ate.
Food and our relationship with it is not static, it needs to evolve as we do, even on a physical level our bodies change a lot as we age. Not considering why we eat, what we do through culture, family or habit is very unsupportive for our wellbeing.
To simply take a moment and look at what food means to us can already be rather revelatory. Why do we eat? For connection with others…but when we eat foods that do not agree with us, or overeat we cannot truly make a connection. To celebrate? But when we eat unhealthy foods and drink alcohol the body suffers..how is this a celebration? To experiment with dates, invigorate and stimulate our senses? What we experience as stimulation is in fact an assault on our senses making them unreceptive for the finer details and what there is to feel. To dull our senses and block our awareness….oh yes..there it does the trick just right.
“So the challenge I feel within myself to not eat that food can be very uncomfortable, but the after effects of eating foods that do not support me last a lot longer than the actual flavour does.” Inspiring to read someone who is successfully working through this one. It is a loving work in progress for me as I still often choose the 5 minutes of pleasure, that often results in hours of discomfort.
I know that one Sarah – 5 minutes of pleasure that really is not pleasurable at all.
So true Sarah, I can relate to this – It is a loving work in progress for me as I still often choose the 5 minutes of pleasure, that often results in hours of discomfort.
When I was younger I felt like the odd one out because I didn’t like any food that was creamy and I hated butter. I found creamy foods made me feel sick and I didn’t like eating them, as I got older I overrode the messages from my body and included more rich food into my diet to fit in, but I could never stomach butter. Now it feels like I have given myself permission to honour what my body feels, and I no longer have any diary products in my diet and nothing that is sickly and I feel so much better for it.
Our relationship with food is telling so much about how we are in life, what we avoid, compensate, dull, we need to get a reward for… this relationship, like any other relationships, won’t change overnight. Your beautiful process in letting your body speak to you, testing out, instead of blindly following ideals and diet- suggestions rules is a beautiful inspiration for everyone.
It’s hilarious how people scrutinise (truly) healthy eating, but condone and almost egg each other on to eat rubbish foods.
Yes Nicole, and it is so good we starting to open up the conversations, real ones, about food and the way we eat. Accordingly to the teachings of The Way of The Livingness it is shown that every persons diet needs to be one that is supportive of their evolution, and that our food; what we need will constantly change, as we change.
Very true, the foods we eat influence us a lot physically as well as mood wise, but this is something we do not learn to pay attention to and not many of us are aware of it, but it is very helpful to observe ourselves in it to find our way back to truly nourishing ourselves through food instead of just consuming what we feel like from our senses but in complete neglect of what our body truly needs.
A couple of years ago food was my accomplice to being and staying emotional. Now food is my accomplice to stay balanced and clear in life. I might not eat the same amount and the sweet seductions of todays food variations anymore, but what I gained in life instead ( true harmony and stillness in my body) , no foodtaste could ever equal.
Food and drink for the majority is of the highest priority. Some it’s a struggle to get and it’s a very real anxiety of when they will next eat. For many of us though, we tend to choose food when influenced by our emotions, stress levels, nervous energy and just looking to fill ourselves up, numb or have some stimulation and excitement. Food and indulging is given so much energy, which in truth depletes our energy, instead of how our being and body feels after we eat. Is it the same? Is it energised, vital and clear? Or is it bogged down and in a state of withdrawal to process what we’ve just put into it?
10 years ago I didn’t realize that not only what I eat, but also how I prepare food and how i am or speak during eating influences how I feel afterwards. The quality of every detail matters and adds to the end result of how our body feels.
What is outside the ‘normal’, anything that would expose the untruth of the right, is often ostracized/ridiculed/attacked. ‘Normal’ is the society’s ‘right’. And in truth, the ‘normal’ is not even normal for us, it never came from us, it is a series of anticipated reactions to well-orchestrated propaganda whose whole intention is to keep us away and blind to the truth of what we are.
Food is huge for all of us and society tells us in so many ways that whatever we do we cannot bring a truth around food. This is why this blog is so important and we need many more blogs like this one so that we can begin to consider that maybe all is not well with the way that we approach food.
I certainly eat more healthily now than I did ten years ago, giving up gluten and dairy, caffeine and alcohol were no big deal, but sugar has been another matter altogether. I gave up refined sugar but craved sweetness so ate fruit instead. Something that happens when I eat too much sweet stuff is I get bitten by insects. Nature is letting me know that I need to drop that too. I’ve been eating nuts as a way to deliberately dull myself. Knowing what’s going on and changing unhealthy habits is a challenge. I am working on being more self loving and more energetically responsible which will, I know, make a huge difference to my self sabotage.
Food is used to deal with so many emotions we don’t want to feel and the self-medication is making us very sick.
It’s pretty incredible how little attention we give to the process of putting a collection of substances into our precious bodies a number of times every single day. When you compare it to how we obsess about our cars, phones, clothes, houses…why is it that we so readily ignore something that is clearly infinitely more relevant to our well-being, vitality and long-term health. It’s madness. And thus, because we are not actually mad (although we can of course debate that?!), there must be something else at play. There must be another force or reason behind this behaviour. What is it that we are hiding from? What is it that we are not prepared to see? Why is it that we resist making different choices? These, and similar, are the very basic and preliminary questions that we need to be asking if we are to get to the root of this. No amount of medical attention or research, no amount of chemical or surgical intervention is actually going to shift anything. No diets, fads, or substitute ingredients will evolve us out of this quagmire. We need to start with honesty. And that is the Page 1, that I am still on.
The ‘why’ and the ‘how’ are equal to the ‘what’ in the constantly fluid equation of eating food
Love reading about the way we eat as opposed to what we are eating. When we pay attention to the why it takes care of the what.
It is interesting to see how many people are overweight these days. I have noticed myself that my own body is communicating with me all the time about the amount I truly need to eat. I have noticed a resistance to eat less as my body is impulsing me to and continue to eat the amount I desire and need to eat to numb my awareness. An important part of our relationship with food is our relationship with awareness.
Absolutely, Joshua, what I eat also has to do with my relationship with awareness and how much awareness I allow. I love the feeling of lightness in my body and clarity in my head after I have eaten.
It’s very revealing of why we eat what we eat and how much when we ask our body and truly listen to when, what and how much it actually wants. When I’m feeling great and focused I don’t even think about food until my body needs it, but when I’m upset, distracted, wanting to not feel or needing a reward all I can think about is food.
Some really good points here Nicole. I love the self-experiment you have done and are continuing to do. It’s not about what we know or what anyone else has told us, it’s about knowing for ourselves what is right for us by being willing to listen to our own bodies. The difference is profound and very powerful.
Yes.. honest observation of how we feel after everything and anything we put into our bodies and how we move – whether that be food, emotions, how we are with ourselves and our bodies. This honest appraisal and awareness of what we’re actually feeling is what supports us to make the changes we know we need to make but can often put off until we’re forced to change.
Universal Medicine has inspired me to re-assess the way i live in response to my body, this may seem like a basic premise but what i have been so struck by is how dictated i was by outside influences; food is a huge one. Although on the surface I was making so called healthy food choices, it was very revealing how little of these choices actually responded to or honoured the constant dialogue that was offered by my body. For example for years i continued to eat nuts like almonds, peanuts and cashews even though after i ate them i would feel a tightening in my throat and my breath would feel slightly restricted – I constantly JUSTIFIED to myself that because they were healthier than a packet of crips they must be better.
My relationship with food very much needs to be taken stock with and refined. For me what I feel would be supportive is to get underneath the behaviours of why I go to certain foods and when, as there are patterns I keep falling back into and have not yet truly re-imprinted. This doesn’t feel heavy or a hard slog and nothing to do with me berating myself but Just about me loving myself more ✨
This is an awesome blog Nicole and very timely too…. as it invites us all to stop and reflect on our choices of food and how those choices are impacting on our thoughts, behaviours and our clarity of being able to read what life presents us with. Recently, I have started eating a few foods that I havent eaten in a long while and there are a few other foods (veg – especially when fried) I can feel are now comfort foods, yet I am not able or perhaps to be more honest. I am not willing to let go yet… mmm, something for me to sit with!
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An important conversation Nicole to return to. Food has become a national obsession and I observe how all pervasive it is. It is of course a big money earner, promoted everywhere, everyday, every media, almost every retail outlet, there is space to sit down and eat. We are fed the lie that it makes us feel better, is sexy, brings people together, whereas without awareness it is a noose around our necks, if not literally killing us, certainly kills vitality and clarity. As you say, eating unconsciously dulls and numbs the body: we use food to hide what we feel and it becomes our ‘go to’ to fill the emptiness we feel inside. Certainly time for a true perspective.
After making the choice to change my diet to one that was so much more honouring of my body it didn’t take too long before “I began to appreciate and enjoy the clarity, vitality and awareness that came with eating to nourish and support me rather than to dull and avoid me.” I realised that I had used food to “avoid me” and as a result was living a much lesser quality of life that was actually possible, the very vital life I am leading today. Yes, it is time for society to take a long honest look at what and how we eat, as the global statistics on the state of humanity’s health are letting us know very clearly that in many cases what we are eating is making us very sick.
How we eat, what we eat, why we eat and when we eat is a biggie. It could be fair to say that the vast majority of us recognise that we over eat and comfort eat. Despite eating far more enriching and healthier foods, (no gluten, dairy, sugar or salt and definitely no caffeine or alcohol) I still have the propensity to overeat and to dull myself when I don’t want to feel what is there to be felt. I know that my body would feel far more vital and light, even with less of the healthy stuff.
When food and mealtimes become highlights of our day rather than the spaces in-between meals. We have a problem.
Yes and I would say most of us live this way, thinking about the next meal rather than living and enjoying the space in-between.
We sure do, yet soo many people say they live to eat and now with snacks etc.. it seems many of us do our best to avoid doing anything but eating!
Yes and when you look around at what is available in shops now there are snacks which are marketed as healthy almost everywhere so we can have what we like to think is guilt free snacking all day.
“After a meal, I still wanted to feel like I had energy, not like I needed a nap” This is straightforward but can actually make an enormous change to how we feel inside and about life, eating not to make our body feel weighed down and full, but instead vital, light and ready for anything that could come our way.
Thank you, Nicole, very inspiring to read how you have developed your relationship with food. In my younger years, I read a lot about what foods are healthy for us. I have since learned by listening to my body that even if every magazine or health food book is raving about a certain vegetable, it doesn’t necessarily mean that my body wants it. For years I was eating salad peppers as a healthy option, but when I would cut into one I would feel nauseous and the same goes for gluten-free oats; foods made with these dull my head and I can’t think straight. Again I used to eat oats for my bowel health and yes they did work in that department, but I couldn’t think straight afterwards. This process of feeling what we eat and why we are eating these things is a science all in itself and should not be dismissed or overridden, especially if we want to feel well.
Looking at the how and why I am eating rather than just eating because I feel hungry has definitely made a big impact on my health and well-being.
A timely blog Nicole that supports us to reflect on our relationship with food and appreciate its true purpose in our lives.
One day everything shall be brought back to it’s true purpose, which is to support us to live the truth of who we all are on Earth.
“Coping with life was always more difficult when I opted for food from a perspective of avoidance, convenience or habit.” Very true, when I eat to not feel I cannot help but feel less clear, more sleepy and less aware of what is going on. Even when I don’t feel heavy or bloated, the decrease in awareness and clarity is always there – making it harder to deal with life or solve simple problems that arise.
It is such a personal experience with food and only one that you can ever know from giving yourself the space to feel what the food does to your body and how it makes you feel. I didn’t even think about this, wasn’t even on my radar but once working with the practical Universal Medicine principles I started to realise how much this has an impact on the quality of my being.
When I don’t want to feel something sometimes the cravings for foods that are not lovingly prepared or are things out of my regular diet it can feel very intense. The perception that I can’t handle what I feel actually feels worse than accepting what I feel! Because in the ‘can’t handle it’ I do all sorts of nonsense that upsets my body.
What we choose to eat is very particular to each person, what kind of day we have had and what our body needs. It is crazy to think that one diet is right for everyone, and I have started to give myself permission to explore my relationship with food without any rights or wrongs.
Yes no one size fits all here, I agree Janet. Our relationship with food comes from our relationship and awareness with what is needed and when.
Recently I have been paying more attention to how I feel after eating and have noticed an overwhelm feeling in my body. Interestingly I had not considered the overwhelm to be associated with food! I realise I have completely denied and dismissed pondering on the possibility that there could be a link between overeating or eating foods that do not support me and my body and the overwhelm I experience very soon after eating lunch. Thank you Nicole for sharing.
I had spent a great deal of my life treating food as a function of the constant motion lifestyle I was living. The body was a furnace that required something to burn to keep me moving. I would often read labels for calorie content, highest calorie ones were always my first choice. A health report on the high amount of caffeine in soft drinks was handy for it allowed me to drink the one that was on the top of the list. This report is what caused someone to market a product that contained twice the amount of sugar and caffeine to become the new king of the hill. Today energy drinks compete with coffee consumption. Did I feel anything in my body other than exhaustion, No! What a change, eating what the body requires and not what the mouth desires.
Thanks for writing this Nicole, as I still have a long way to go with food and I found this very supportive. I realise now how numb I must have been to be able to eat the foods I used to and the amount I used to eat, for now I can feel really bloated after eating only slightly more than I need, but I guess that slightly I will look back on and think it huge. I used to pride myself on being able to eat and drink anything and everything but the more I listen to my body the more I have to change, even though the resistance is always there.
Nicole, I love what you are sharing. Reading this makes me ponder on how what I eat affects me. Yesterday I forgot to take my lunch to work and noticed that I actually felt much clearer and less tired in the afternoon than previously – this was very interesting to feel and made me realise how much food can dull us. It’s great to experiment with this, thank you.
That the body can survive longer without food than without sleep gives us a huge indication where our priorities lie. Most of us are happy to get by on the bare minimum of sleep, staying up well past the point our bodies are indicating it is time for rest and/or loading ourselves up with stimulating foods and activities before bed so that when we do sleep it is less a restoration and enrichment for the body and more so a complete collapse/shutdown. But ask us to go without food for a day or two or even make minor dietary adjustments and all hell breaks loose because we are suddenly asked to let go of the buffer we have in place to not feel the truth of where we are at.
Liane this is a truly eye-opening comment thank you.
“My meals became about supporting my body to feel vital, not heavy or weighed down.” There is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to eat, just a way to be aware of how our body feels when and how we eat or drink anything.