I was unexpectedly placed in the position of being forced to take a timed test quite recently.
The surprise test was part of a professional development day – a ‘fun’ activity with a screen technology, where several colleagues and I were asked to complete a task using the said screen under timed conditions. Our times were to be recorded and our names placed on a leader board for the entire staff to view. It was immediately evident that there would be a winner, many close contenders and even more ‘also rans’ or losers.
I was very disturbed by what unfolded. Before the buzzer went there seemed to be a dismissive sizing up of each other, a mental assessment of how things were going to play out. This instantly created a sense of individual isolation in the entire room, which became cold.
The rules were that no one could help anyone else until they had completed the task themselves and then any potential helpers could simply point to the screen – not physically show how to complete the task.
Knowing next to nothing about the technology, I prepared myself to wait until support was offered. This brought the opportunity to observe how people went about ‘playing’ the game.
My colleagues are usually very amiable and supportive, good humoured people.
However, the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else. In between bouts of intense activity, a couple of them glanced at me to check out how I was going. There was contempt in their look that communicated ‘loser,’ derived from the mania they had gone into in order to complete the test successfully in super quick time.
Things were taking a while so I asked my closest colleague how to get started with this. The supervisor swept over to us and vetoed my colleague’s support as he was yet to complete the task himself. I felt the entire left side of my upper body, including my arm, go into a kind of collapse, accompanied by a feeling of sadness as I felt how this contrived situation of timed competition, of a winning and losing situation, had placed my colleagues into an ‘every man for himself’ mindset, which was totally unlike themselves. I was out of the game because I couldn’t even get started and I could not reach my colleagues to connect with them in our usual way, nor to ask them to support me in the task. Our usual sense of mutual support and working together had completely gone out of the window in favour of recording a winning or respectable time and securing a place on the ladder.
As people completed the task, the scores were placed on a leader board and many staff members commented how they’d like a rematch in order to get to the top of the ladder – to prove their worth and skill!
I was stunned to hear people say they’d enjoyed this activity after what I had observed. Everyone wanted a second opportunity to prove they could do it – they could improve their time and knock the winner, who was having a moment of inflated recognition, off his podium.
How could such a trivial, everyday task place normally lovely people into this state of intense competition in such a short period of time (the activity took four minutes)? What made them cut themselves off from each other to get a reasonable time, if not, the winning time, with such disdain shown for those who were self-evidently going to be ‘last’?
Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.
Contrived situations like this one remove us so far from this innate essence.
Moreover, as an educator, this begs the huge question of what is occurring within our children and their bodies as they progress through an education system that measures progress through timed tests, which rank and order students’ scores – even as far as on a national scale – from the age of 8.
If one four minute test could generate so much competitive angst, intensity and social isolation, what effects do the multitude of tests in education have on our children, their bodies and their world view, especially when such tests deliberately foster the ‘every man for himself’ mindset? Can we really continue to brush off such considerations with blanket statements like, “It develops resilience,” and that, “It’s only a test”?
In our worldwide education systems, some tests, and one’s achievement levels therein, dictate what University degree or career one can aspire to, and from there, one’s path in life. How do we measure or even begin to understand the extent to which this ‘test effect’ is compounded many, many times over in such pivotal real life situations? Or do we merely witness the exponential rise in childhood mental ill health and youth suicide, feigning to not be aware of the causes?
From this four minute observation, it appears that we all need to consider deeply what occurs in these tests and the highly deleterious effects they have on all participants – including the ostensible winners. Based on what was witnessed, I would say that the moments of ‘victory’ are brief and shallow and that truly there are no real winners at all. So why do we do continue to endorse such tests and force them onto our children?
By Anonymous
Further Reading:
A life of purpose – does the way we are educated affect our attitude towards life?
The True Purpose of Education – One Size Fits All or Evolution?
When exam stress becomes a matter of life and death: The effect of exams on student health and wellbeing
Gill when we go into nervous energy to deal with any situation we are lost and that is exactly why life is set up in the way that it is. We are all living on nervous energy in varying degrees which keeps us in the disconnection to ourselves because when our bodies are racy we cannot feel the innate stillness we come from. So understanding energy is key.
Your experience would be my nightmare; I would hate to be tested in such restricted and competitive way. As these tests do not account for the fact that everyone has a different quality to bring to the table and from that we can work together to form a consensus. In nature we can see that the seed needs soil, water and sunlight to grow. It cannot do this by just being a seed it requires support in just the same way we need support to grow and reach our potential and we do this best when we all support each other and not behave as individuals.
With any form of comparison we also get jealousy and either are killers of our evolution and when we understand these flaws in the way our society operates the sooner we will evolve and return to our Soul-full essences.
If such an exercise is used to expose the effect of time pressure and competitiveness then it has some worth, especially if it is tried with those who set the education curriculum! In a classroom with children it is clearly harmful.
The interesting thing is, when we have a situation that requires competitiveness it brings about a physical reaction in the body. The reaction is one that is familiar and either embraces the opportunity to show everyone our worth and get to the top, or close to the top of the leader board, or give up and know our place towards the middle or bottom. Those memories and expectations live in our bodies until we get an opportunity to call them out and re-assess their value.
I know only too well what it feels like to go into competition – the tightness, tension, blindness to others – it is definitely a form of fight and flight; a high stress physiological state that has an impact on our bodies and this is huge when it is sustained over long periods – at work, in our home lives, relationships etc.
The other day at college we had a surprise test sprung onto us and I could feel the anxiety rise so I looked at my wrist blood pressure gadget and my blood pressure had shot up eight points without even getting up. Is it any wonder that children don’t like tests when this happens to the body.
No wonder at all. There are some careers that need this level of focus but it would be much smarter to train our children to be ready for life with skills that are transferable rather than teach them high anxiety at such a young age. We only have to look at school systems in other countries such as Sweden to see an alternate view.
I had to undergo a test on a training course the other day, it caused the whole group palpable tension and stress which was not dissipated by anything. There must be another way of doing things where people do not fall into such patterns of anxiety.
Yes, much could be learned by the organisation of what not to do from the example in the blog.
It is hardly surprising how and why rates of anxiety are so high amongst school children, ‘If one four minute test could generate so much competitive angst, intensity and social isolation, what effects do the multitude of tests in education have on our children, their bodies and their world view’.
” contrived situation of timed competition, ”
Its so important to recognise “contrived ” situations and there is one easily recognised in competition for in winning another feels the pressure of falsely been show as less.
On the flip side I experience timed tests with mild anxiety attacks! This was how I bumbled through school and now doing an apprenticeship my exam fears have come back as fresh as if I was in school yesterday. I am working with my beliefs from school now but what if we didn’t teach this in the first place? I wouldn’t be regressing to a panicked 10 yr old in front of the training manager that’s for sure! And many other adults wouldn’t carry the scars of school with them.
Who decides how much time is enough for an exam? I remember growing up that eating lima beans had almost no time limit that I would have to stay at the dinner table till I had eaten all on my plate. Both are time-based judgements that others believe you should be able to do.
Ha ha that is so true, we apply the time limit based on the outcomes we want. I remember not having a time limit when it was something I had to stay and do/eat, but there was definitely a time limit on what I had called fun!
There is such an ingrained assumption that to do things against the clock is to try and beat time – a crazy notion when there is no such thing as time in the first place.
What I am finding is that if I forget about time, as in not putting limits and restrictions on when I want to have certain things done by or not micro managing my time then time seems to morph and I enter a different kind of timeless zone. There’s a phrase that comes to me and that is that I am ‘locating myself in space’.
‘I was stunned to hear people say they’d enjoyed this activity after what I had observed. ‘ Gosh, this is very sobering. For people to consider enjoying something that is so competitive to me feels like a marker of how far off we can get. Like there was a time when I’d have easily said the same. I’d have said how exciting and fun it was – a buzz of adrenalin in an attempt to get recognition which I lived for, a little like a drug so any chance to get some I’d have been in.
In the UK, electricians have a regulation that all of your work must comply. Every few years after numerous amendments they republish it. You are required to re-sit an exam when a new book gets published. The test has 45 multiple questions and you have 90 minutes to complete the exam. That is 2 minutes per question. It is an open book exam to see if you can find the answer in the book. The questions can be as long as this comment is now. A good practice is read the question twice then, go to the index that doesn’t list a page number, but a section number, i.e. Sec 4-13-b. Now you have to find that paragraph in the book. There may be numerous locations that could contain the answer. The clock keeps ticking. It becomes a race to finish in time. The exam is not to test not your memory but your ability to find the answer.
Absolutely, if one 4 minute test could change an adults behaviour then what are the constant test that children and young people at school doing!! We sooo need to drop the test and competition.
Steve that’s CRAZY!!!!!!!!
Competition invades so many aspects of our lives now, sport, academics, work and family. Even siblings can compete for parent’s attention if they do not feel comfortable within themselves.
It’s never ‘only’ anything. There is always energy behind everything and therefore important that we discern it quality and any intentions within it.
Yes, the ‘only’ pretends it’s not what it is, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing as the saying goes. It is mean too – like if you were to find yourself feeling disturbed the it’s ‘only’ strips you of the validity of your response, it asks you to downplay and bury what you may have really felt.
Sadly true Ariana. Comparison and competition are deadly. When will the world wake up to this fact? We can show and reflect – by the way we live = that life doesn’t have to be like that.
“Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.” I so agree. I observe young children automatically helping others and supporting them – with no awareness of wanting a reward. Cooperating with each other brings out the best for all and builds brotherhood. Competition separates us from each other.
It’s only a test …. that crushes people
It’s only the education system that pressurises children with sats, with exams and conforming to a whole system that is designed to make a child feel small and insignificant.
It’s only is never ‘it’s only’, it’s always a whole deal going on.
Talking to my son yesterday about how competition changes things, I could feel the questioning in him, ‘Can I really live in the world, at school, on the sports field without competition? Can I actually be and do things in relationship with myself and my development irrespective of what others around me are doing?’ I reckon these are great questions to ask in a world that never even considers an alternative to the misguided belief that competition is innate in us.
‘However, the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else.’ There are many occasions where we are put under time pressures and we usually buy into them – I know I lived under the rule of deadlines, forcing myself to complete things under pressure. I’ve seen what’s said here happen in the work place quite often. People hand themselves over to tasks at the expense of themselves and the connection they have with others. I have been this way – like a focused laser, anyone getting in the way gets burnt! It’s felt so cutting being at the receiving end of this so I now am learning not to put tasks in front of people no matter how noble, essential or good.
Yes I agree, Gill. It is a profound moment when we stop falling for the much promoted myth that competition is natural and healthy.
The invasive, destructive nature of competition exposed. And we big it up as being a healthy aspect of being human. Come on.
People change when there is a mere mention of being on teams. We see it as healthy to test ourselves against each other but if we stop and feel the tension and anxiety in the body it clearly isn’t healthy for us.
‘I felt how this contrived situation of timed competition, of a winning and losing situation, had placed my colleagues into an ‘every man for himself’ mindset, which was totally unlike themselves.’ Yet, when we are totally unlike ourselves in these types of situation we see it as perfectly normal and acceptable. In fact, it is so normal that to question it brings up tension and disbelief in another.
Thank you for sharing this. It is interesting that the majority thinks by setting up those kind of games/test we are going to be best at what we do!!! It might take a while until we are able to built something like the pyramids again…
The way we have set up our education system has a lot to answer for in the way it has us competing against one another from such a young age… my feeling and observation is that competition is the opposite of our true nature. This means that one of education’s main foundation stones is a deviation from truth.
I agree Matilda, competition is the ‘opposite of our true nature’, yet it can become so ingrained in us. A new work colleague commented to me the other day how great it is to be working with someone who is not trying to compete with them as we all do so much better and enjoy work when we work together, rather than making it all about us.
I was considering the other day about scrutiny… I have always hated being observed as a teacher and having marks given against my performance depending on the behaviour and results of the children I teach. I realised that my wobbles stem from an investment in what others think about me, competing with others and from a lack of inner security, but by building inner confidence and strength, letting go of any outcome; why would I not welcome scrutiny and allow myself to be transparent whatever the end result may be?
I agree, Rachel. And then ‘scrutiny’ becomes something we actually front foot as we live transparently, openly, honestly and without performance related anxiety.
The disharmony of competition and how it really feels to us in our body and the reality of the love we are is great to expose and see what is really going on, how we are living and what we champion as the way to be and the tests we impose on ourselves or are imposed on us in life. Very exposing under” its only a test “.
We’ve got nothing to prove to no-one just a simple love to consistently live, if you’re looking for the real test in life then this is it.
This shows the disharmony in competition and begs the question why do we still indulge if we know it is not loving. There is a reflection in this that asks us to be honest about how much we like and feed comparison.
Lately, I went to a one day course with a test at the end in order to renew my safe work certificate. The course was only about what you have to know to make a good test. There was no time for sharing knowledge or any conversation on the topic to get a deeper and tangible understanding about the subject at all. So disconnected and empty actually.
How lost can we feel when we are out of the game, but the real question of course to ask yourself should be: ‘do I want to be part of the game or not’ as that will make clear if we choose for ourselves or for the whole.
It’s like this test represents life and every day. How we wake up and then get on with the day we approach it like a test, how well we can do it, how we perform, compare ourselves to others or even just from our previous days performance. The comparison and pressure we are putting on ourselves is one we can live life but what I have learnt is that it doesn’t need to be like this. Universal Medicine presents a different way of connecting and living life and it includes loving ourselves to the max and letting go whatever does not celebrate who we are.
I and eight others are having to go through a testing exercise every other week at college and it’s not easy – it actually feels unnatural to the body to be put under so much pressure. One lady physically feels sick every week, even when she’s not being tested.
I can very much relate to that, I still remember the paralyzing feeling of possibly being caught as ‘not measuring up’, a feeling that followed me later in life in similar situations.
‘Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.’ – The moment we turn to competitiveness we reject our innate nature and the way we would naturally connect with ourselves and others.
My body does always feel so anxious in these situations where there is no space to connect and work together but instead have to work completely on our own, only for our own gain.
I’m realising the pressure I put myself under when conforming to time. Yes, things need to be done in a certain time but there is a way of doing them without racing against the clock and getting stressed and causing myself undue distress and disconnectedness.
These types of activities are championed under the guise of team building. Anyone could feel and see the change in people when you have them compete against each other and yet we still want to see it all as a good thing.
Whilst reading this I could feel the intensities of how it felt partaking in tests or competitions in the past. This ‘every man for himself’ attitude is an understatement and exists in everything. It commences from an young age within the home, especially when there are siblings around, in schools, in sports, applying for jobs, buying houses, retail sales – there is no escape from this.
I’ve been observing the anxiety within me but also in others when ‘assessments’ were mentioned at a recent course I was participating in. For most it was about failing and yet we experienced something totally different. It was relaxed, so much support from the presenter, unlike other past experiences.
There is another way – are we prepared to be part of this change?
An eye opening insight into the energetic impact of competition on a group of work colleagues; Its fascinating to clock how the energetic shift that you felt Anon amongst your colleagues and within the room was accepted by the majority as part of the process.
Whenever I hear the words “It’s only…” I know a seducing justification is about to be delivered in an attempt to diminish and disregard an experience which is asking us to consider perhaps there is another way.
Mmm very true Golnaz, they are fascinating words and essentially are setting us up for something.
‘However, the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else.’ – This is a great example of how competition instantly takes us out of our natural connecting, caring and harmonious state of being.
Great observation here in this article and I could so relate to the feelings that you express although I had not stopped to allow the space to really get to grips with it and see it for what it is and have it so clear. Thanks for taking the time to express as you have.
What an utterly pointless task though I suppose if you want to be positive at least it showed how ugly and unhelpful and anti evolution this was.
When we consider that our world is out of control with so many in a competitive, combative place and are prepared to fight for a position of seemingly higher ground. Then could it be possible that we need to work on a deeply Loving approach to all of life so that we are working together to better society at every level!
There are tests that are designed to evaluate how well we are able to demonstrate a learned skill or ability and then there are tests in which it is more about how well can you recall knowledge so you can compete for a certain rank or position.
When we make it about time and not space we restrict ourselves far more than we care to give attention to. Furthermore, such a constrictive way to live inhibits our ability to build a relationship with space and all the Universal wisdom that is communicated through it. This starts early in life and if not arrested becomes the driving force that propels us through life at breakneck speed, never stopping to fully feel and appreciate the divinity we are and are from.
Such important questions raised here in relation to the effect of tests, exams, pressure and expectations on children throughout school. We strive for achievement in one direction without any regard for the collateral damage to health and wellbeing.
I agree, and in addition the damage it has on the way we relate to each other.
Could it also be the breeding ground for competition?
If we put kids being who they are at the heart of life, the test system would be a very different picture and emphasis or checking in on how we are doing but more importantly focused on how much of the magic, joy and love are each kid still expressing and living.
It’s fascinating to share about such a shift in dynamics when we make it about winning.,it shows how this activity has no place in humanity.
I agree, it exposes how completely off track it takes us and how strongly it affects and alters our way of behaving with each other.
‘…the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else.’ It’s amazing how conditioned we have been to know exactly what to do in order to ‘win’ and how it requires us to step on others in the process. The other thing is, how is it that normally caring people don’t object but even consider it fun?
I remember studying for primary school teaching and being very puzzled how the model of physical activity being taught was based in inclusivity, accepting difference and teamwork but had a 25% part consisting of competition which nobody questioned for being at odds with the underlying core values. The notion of ‘healthy competition’ no-one likes to question. Have we accepted it as an inevitable part of life?
It is a great connection to make here, about the longer affects and real-life stress of the constant exams and testing that happens in schools.
Some forms of not being harmonious are very obvious, like taking a divisive, competitive test. Other forms are much more subtle but have the same effect of moving us away from harmony. It is only that it may take us longer to notice the disharmony.
So true… It’s only a test, now they are instituting these tests as early as in kindergarten, setting the tone for the rest of people’s lives, until this awful cycle is broken.
We have been set up to believe that life is limited and we must fight others for our slice in the limelight. Nothing could be further from the truth – everything is here for everyone if we just work together and realise we are one.
The irony is that we get the perception that there is not enough exactly because of the mentality that “life is limited and we must fight others for our slice in the limelight” and the one-up-manship, greed and exclusivity it engenders. When we work together not only is there enough but we actually magnify and enhance the splendour that we are already showered with.
Is that limelight worth fighting for when we all have an inner-light? Me says no it’s not. It’s like comparing a dull yellow energy saving bulb to the sun.
There is so much more behind the test thing and all that competition brings us, against all the oneness and love we innately are and the stress this causes us is marked and known by all but is how our world is currently run in the separation it fosters. A great exposure and question.
Already when I read a ” timed” test, it shivers me. I remember being in school and the stress that I felt in my whole body, when it appeared. Why do we have things like that, that champions those who can recall knowledge in a certain period of time and define themselves by simple function, when in fact the true wisdom comes from space and being yourself in full in whatever you do.
The irony is that competition is injected in the belief that it enhances productivity. However, how much greater the productivity is when working collaboratively together in harmony with everyone recognised, acknowledged and supported to bring their own unique input to the task.
I can remember at school I couldn’t stand tests like the evenings when at home the parents would go out and the kids would play a game of monopoly and the two ‘intelligent’ ones would just go for it, just no holds bar and on a mission. You can see how this is what the working systems are all built up on major competitiveness and comparison and it feels gross.
The corporate and business world is filled with competition, and indeed competition is seen as a crucial part of business success, but at its crux competition crushes unity and leaves us all less.
The changes we make to fit into and conform to the tests and ideals of society and the competition and lostness we feel from them with each other is a sad part of where we have come to in society today. It really is time to address this and end the continued separation and competition with each other and come to the oneness, harmony and understanding of each other lovingly.
How to bring competition in to play with one foul swoop and pit colleague against colleague – ‘professional development’ has a lot to answer for.
The fact that we put times on tests seems to focus on ranking people on how well they perform under pressure and delivering or performing to deadlines. Rather than do they understand a topic or are able to critically think.
Test are not supporting at all, I remember during my college and University days when we had to cram learn to just to remember, not because we truly understood what we learning, it was more about what you remember not about can you apply what you have learnt . It really is false way, there is no real truth this way beside ranking people who remember the most, rather than who can truly apply the topic.
Your closing question is something to deeply ponder on. We have all felt the impact of tests whether we apparently succeed or fail. It makes absolutely no sense to continue to decimate our self-worth in this way.
What you describe clearly here is how we can be taken over by an energy and how we then simply are not being ourselves anymore and how much we have allowed this way of being by the many systems we have created.
It is great eye opener how energy can take over and we are not being ourselves, being caught in the world of creation.
The pressure to perform on pop quizzes can be disabling! Who has not known someone that was great at their job, but would choke if given a test? If the test was part of a culling process, How many quality people become redundant if the test is part of a culling process?
Yes, we have that in Australia for financial advisers at the moment. All of us need to take a degree-level exam within two years and most of need to do 2/3 of a Masters degree or a full degree within 5 years and many advisers have decided to leave the industry rather than go through this. It will raise educational standards but it may not be the worst of us who are leaving.
If we see life, or moments of it, as a test, we’re totally missing the point. Life is about learning, and when we take ourselves down the track of trying to get something or achieve something from it, we lose the connection to the bigger picture, the simplicity, the joy and the richness that is always on offer, moment to moment.
The trap of wanting our children to have an easier life than we had, is designing them not to learn from life! What is our part in the fostering of the ‘I want generation’?
Forcing our self to compete in life only distracts us and when we need to live our life as a person in the work force what we have done in many cases is of little value.
For every winner there is a loser. The winner gets inflated and the loser deflated sometimes with a feeling of being crushed. Either state is foreign to our natural sense of being, which is to be harmonious, open and equal with all.
“It’s only a test…” – translated: “Let’s bring some energy and division into this group, that will wake them up!”
It would seem that the education system’s foundation of assessment now is the norm for team’s and workplaces too. Far more productivity and efficiency is reached and fun had when people work collaboratively appreciating another’s talent or contribution rather than competing.
We are all strong in certain areas and here to inspire each other, we all have something to offer, to not allow us to support one another from a young age, brings in the habit of separation into our lives in a big way. Separation in society is endemic and we need to consider the effect not supporting one another actually has on society.
“I would say that the moments of ‘victory’ are brief and shallow and that truly there are no real winners at all.” Yes it is because the energy we have to put ourselves in to compete, win and succeed in this way is so cold and hard that the knowing of having won is nothing to compare with this coldness and hardness we now have to deal with in our bodies, and we all have to as soon as we join, no matter what place we end up in the ranks.
Perhaps what I always found the hardest thing about any test or exam was not so much the topic being tested and whether I did or did not know something but more about how much competition everyone went into. This is most unnatural and in truth totally unnecessary.
The body language and the total disconnection with others is a good example of where we as a humanity are at in general, we treat life as a test and the have succeed and prove ourselves. Such a give away really how lost and if track we really are.
An ounce of comparison of one upmanship is the evil of what keeps us all separated from our core truth to live in brotherhood and as one.
I’ve got a team building event coming up and I can already feel the whole set up… everyone eyeing up who is in the teams, the sense of worth or not depending on whether you were picked first or last, the tingle of adrenalin with the ready, set, go, and then the inevitable stress we put ourselves under to perform. The outcome is irrelevant, and there is nothing about my natural quality in all of the above scenario. Be interesting to see what I choose this time round…..
If we have to make competition normal, it would have to be a huge disregard of what our body is feeling and then the insidiousness is being separated and recognized individually becomes our normal and what we strive for instead of listening to what our body feels.
It can amaze what some might say is enjoyable when if we are honest about what has actually taken place and the energy that we went into we would have to admit it was far from enjoyable.
Yes and this requires a loving level of honesty with ourselves.
Yes indeed, competition forces us to abandon our natural gentleness and care for others, and is a separative construct in society the majority of us have bought into.
‘As people completed the task, the scores were placed on a leader board and many staff members commented how they’d like a rematch in order to get to the top of the ladder – to prove their worth and skill!’ our worth never comes from anything we do or a measurement of it.
It is great to have your experience written here in words, because this opens the way for anyone else who has also experienced the same to express themselves about this subject too, which could be the beginning of how we slowly start to dismantle the illusion of competition.
Agree Gill it is making us feel less than others. When in truth we all know that we are here to share our wisdom with each other, we all come with our own awareness and understanding.
It is one thing to have a test to check how much has been learnt in order to support bridge the gap for what understanding needs to be strengthened and another thing to be pitching people against one another in competition. The two activities are a world apart and ought not be confused together.
Yes. Not even the winner feels good about the process – only a momentary excitement followed by a let-down.
Competition is championed in our society at all costs. ‘It brings out the best in us’, ‘don’t be so serious, it is just for fun’ and what you have said ‘it develops resilience’ and ‘It’s only a test’ are examples of not wanting to feel the effects on our life. When we point out the detrimental effects of what a test does to ourselves and our innate nature of working together we spoil the fun but the figures about suicides and ill mental health in young people don’t lie, the pressure of competition both online and in real life are getting higher and higher, is this what we truly want for our children and ourselves?
I did loads of tests in school but today can honestly say that none of them really enabled me to truly flourish from the inside out. The only thing that these tests taught me was how to feel nervous, stressed and insecure.
I can resonate with what you share, the tests did not support me to flourish but made me more stressed, nervous and insecure. I just felt I had to just keep working harder and harder to achieve anything.
This shows how competition just pits us against one another – even with people who are usually supportive. What’s horrible is that this is considered fun! What I wonder about is the drive it puts people in to beat another if they didn’t the first time, wanting a second chance to do so. So even though the test was ended I do wonder if there was a residual energy left whereby people felt cheated at not having 2nd chances to beat their fellow colleagues and how long it took to let this go.
‘It’s only a test’, sends thousands and thousands of kids into fear of failure, anxiety and distress especially when we set such high stakes. Mental wellbeing is most definitely compromised through such a heavy weighted test curriculum in the UK.
Well said Rachel. When this is paired with a lack of support for children to remain with and understand what they feel in life we are clearly setting the perfect condition for problems and yet society does not want to admit it’s own part with the problems that we face.
Just the thought of a test triggers many anxiety not only for kids but in adults too.
So true Rachel. In the process of testing driving our kids from a very early age, we have completely abandoned the true purpose of education. What good is it turning out a bunch of highly stressed kids jammed packed with knowledge but with little or no comprehension of who they really are, what their God given qualities are and how to develop trust worthy relationships? It has ‘Disaster Zone’ written all over it.
Being put on the spot and being asked to take a test is one of the worst feelings and I have seen some potential work colleagues slip through the cracks because of this method.
Julie those ‘cracks’ that you are referring to are everywhere and often purposefully set up by us in the hope that another will fall into them. Which really begs several questions ‘what is it that we’re trying to achieve?. At what cost? and ultimately who misses out?’
It almost feels like you can’t win – crack under pressure or play the game and be a part of the problem.
You raise a very important theme going on all around us from primary school to the workplace. The pressure of time and competition e.g.win and not loose. I can see it with children around me in their final year of primary school: level of stress the tests have on them whether they score high enough to go to high school, the stress if they are accepted to the school they want, the overwhelm of being at high school with weekly tests and then the reflief they score high on their tests (‘I am okay’ relief) or low (‘I am not okay’stress) and still years to go. The human being turns into a full of stress human doing/performing. We need a reflection like you who does not play ball with game.
‘Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.’ And actually to do anything else – well, all the everything else we do: compare, judge, set ourselves against one another, compete etc. – takes a huge amount of effort, because we are always going against the flow and pull of what is totally natural.
There is no doubt that putting people in competitive situations with a reward at the end gets results, but at what cost is this to our health and our relationships and therefore our communities?
It’s only a test. yet after reading all you have shared, it really has shone the light on the harmful effects of so called ‘tests’, not only the separation from one another but also the damaging effects to one’s body as you described. And begs the question, what these tests do to our childern.
I still have anxiety dreams about going into class and having an exam I did not know about!
I am 67 years old! Talk about trauma.
Tests just set us up to go into comparison and judgement.
Wow this really highlights the destruction of getting it right. The whole way competition is set up is to win based on another’s rules – but what if we took a step back and appreciated each person for who they are not how well they preform
We create artificial situations and rules in order to run such tests and then assess ourselves on the results – makes absolutely no sense.
Stress competition and comparison are all festered by tests and something that is not natural and healthy or loving for us and are designed to keep us all separate and less than who we truly are. A great blog sharing the truth of tests for us all to ponder on.
I have clients who are students and even though it is the start of the academic year they are already talking about the anxiety they feel about their exams at the end of the year…how can this level of stress be a healthy or effective way to teach young people?
And does this mean that as our children go through the education system they come to normalise ever more constant and increasing levels of anxiety and stress? A body under constant stress will exhaust very fast. Hence our coffee addiction?
Your description of your colleagues reaction to your inability to complete the task captures the madness that overcomes people when they go into competitive mode and the fact that it is endemic in our education system means our children are growing up in a world where they are often forced to pit their wits against each other rather than learning to work in co-operation for the benefit of all.
Competition and comparison contains the evil of separation.
“If one four minute test could generate so much competitive angst, intensity and social isolation, what effects do the multitude of tests in education have on our children, their bodies and their world view,….” A very valid point. Competition engenders fierce self-interest and a lack of compassion for others. With education fostering such attitude it is no wonder that adult life has also come to a ‘me first and foremost’ belief, negating the feelings of others.
The moment we measure ourselves against another we create a divide that severs our connection not only from the other, but also from ourselves and from God. It is the game of separation and how evil seeks to run.
That makes so much sense as you can’t separate from one without separating from the all. Makes every relationship very important!
As soon as we out anything under a test scenario, even without adding timing the state of the matter being tested changes as we impose something on it which is not of it.
The only thing a Test tests is how good we are at doing tests. Bit of a limiting self serving loop to buy into when there are many more extremely productive ways to assess people abilities.
Agreed Rowena – reminds me of a quote from Einstein ‘if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it’s going to spend it’s whole life thinking it’s stupid’.
To think that our overpowering another in competition to gain a momentary sense of power or be victorious is an illusion. In truth, all that is gained is a further separation from the true power and wisdom that is naturally present and always accessible when we live honouring our connection to our body and being which then is beautifully magnified when we work together.
Competition and time pressure seem to bring out the worst in people. During the test there can be a ‘buzz’ that stops us feeling the separation that happens between people but as was observed there is an intensity, harshness and dog eat dog that comes in. Why would we want to foster this in our teams and work relationships? To me, this is not how great things come about.
I really love the exposure you share here, its not talked about enough, the stress, the strain, both physical and mental that is placed on us when we are expected to compete against another.
Its one of the things in the future where they will look back and see it for what it is – barbaric.
Pretty much every day of my work is a sort of “timed test”. In that I have a specific amount of work that has to be completed and a very rigid time within which to get it done. I have been working like this for over 20 years and can say that whilst it is often incredibly stressful and I certainly haven’t mastered how to do it, there are lots of things that we can do to ensure that it doesn’t affect us. It’s of course all about preparation and the connection, presence and commitment that we bring to our day. Take your eye off the ball for 30 mins in the morning and you’ll pay for it at the end of the day. I work with a big team of people, so it becomes all about the connection to them and supporting all of them to be on it, to know what is required and to feel the support of the whole. There are many aspects and details to this that could be written about for hours, but the sum of it is that every moment matters and time doesn’t change, slow down or speed up, so in fact we do know what the parameters are and what needs to be done – but then there is a whole other level to it – and that is about the quality in which it is done and this is something that I’m really exploring now. Getting it done is of no true purpose if the quality of the work is not true. It’s a fascinating and an ever-evolving science for me.
So true Otto anything that is worth doing, it is worth doing properly and if quality drops due to a time frame something needs to be altered to counter this.
“Getting it done is of no true purpose if the quality of the work is not true.” So true Otto – and the care you take of your huge team is evident in your expression here. As you say. ‘every moment matters’ and we aren’t always aware of the ripples we send out to everyone around us – and beyond.
Tests are crippling all areas of our world from education to corporate to everyday living. Putting any timer on and measuring our worth that is not coming from an appreciation is harming to say the least.
Even reading this I can remember the feeling of my heart rate increasing and my body changing before competitive events like this, especially sports and athletics. Our bodies must go through the same processes with any competition and this is not a healthy way to live.
Great summing up of the room as the participants braced themselves for the competition – noting just what happens to them and the atmosphere it creates.. ‘Before the buzzer went there seemed to be a dismissive sizing up of each other, a mental assessment of how things were going to play out. This instantly created a sense of individual isolation in the entire room, which became cold.’
It is becoming increasingly well known and acknowledged that a true leader is one that supports others to expand and lead equally, and a true manager is one that supports others to grow to at least to the same level.
So why are we still investing in activities that encourage competition and an “I need to be better than the next person” mentality?
“They” say that competition is good for business but that opens the door to trickery and psychological seduction and this goes for all workplaces. Competition is no good on any level, not between siblings, friends, work colleagues, businesses or even within government ( which is on display on a daily basis).
Beautifully expressed and the key here is quality; so often the first thing that gets thrown out of the window when companies or individuals are competing with others.
This article shows how when we are asked to be competitive towards each other all the care we have for others goes out of the window. What a horrible situation to be placed in.
A lot of what is presented to us can contain an element of deception. What was tested in this ‘test’? What was the gain for the group from the ‘test’? It is similar with when we are being ‘surveyed’, where our goodwill at times get abused by the survey trying to sell us something.
Reminds me of the tests that one of our children sat the end of their primary education in the UK. The results of these tests were not passed on to secondary school, who did their own assessments when he arrived. Thus the sole purpose off these tests (that they had been stressing about for a year) were so that the school could be judged by the government watchdogs alongside all the other primary schools. So – 10/11 yr old children put under stress for a year of their teaching (along with the fact that during that year their education became very, very lineal, dry and reductive in its focus during this year) just so that the school can be ranked in some kind of league table. And of course, these tables are published and become the public’s barometer of where to send their children, so the school (which is ultimately a business) is forced to push their pupils to get the very best marks possible so that the school can qualify for next year’s grants. The whole system is so deeply flawed and the interest and care of the children is so far down the priority ladder in all of this. Crazy!
Those competitive team building challenges can be some of the most divisive and have detrimental effects that are opposite to what was intended, because in my experience although people “work together”, they are actually working together to work against and beat another. This does not make sense to me if true harmony was the intention of team work.
Agreed – it becomes a group of people working together but with a self-interest rather than true collaboration.
What is the point of proving how fast we are at something when the process causes us to loose sight of our best talent and feature: teamwork. No one can ever work in isolation, we all at some point have to work with other people, so why not nurture this quality so as to confirm and strengthen our natural powers.
Yes, learning to be in relationship and work together with others lays the foundation of a true education.
Such a great testimonial highlighting how our lives are set up from very young to put us in an unnatural state of competition. You can feel the separation and aggression and a total shift from an innate yearning which we know is to be in a harmonious and loving way with each other. I am an educator, and this article really has brought it home to me the detrimental effects of education models. Thank you.
Is competition the wedge we have created to keep us separated from ourselves and all others?
And the opposite seems to be true, when everyone comes together to support after a major traumatic event in their locality, only to usually return to their separative existence after things have settled back to ‘normal’.
Interesting that the test was pitched as a ‘fun’ activity aNd many chose to engage with it in that way even though you could observe that they were not as amiable and caring of one another as you had witnessed them before. Amazing how we let ourselves be fooled by the facade of things.
So true Golnaz. If we are totally honest there is no fun in a game of one up-man ship, because it is completely devoid of our most deeply shared joy, working in relationship with one another.
“ the surprise test was part of a professional development day “. It’s pretty sad to think that this process described passes for professional development
I agree John. In my book Professional Development means bringing to the fore more of our innate abilities to share with the world so we can deepen both our private and professional relationships. I cannot connect with how creating a competition that pitches people against one another can ever serve this purpose.
Competition is so imbued in society that we have come to accept it as normal, healthy, even- when in fact everything about it is not: the pressure we put on ourselves and our physicality, the need to conform and ‘get it right’, the drive for perfection and the fear of failing; all of which makes us feel more distant from feeling our natural state of being steady and diminishes our sense of feeling truly connected to one another.
Perfection is a fallacy! Does it exist anywhere in nature including the animal kingdom? The only place it seems to flourish is in our minds? What fun would life be without discovering new things by making mistakes?
Well said, Steve…perfection is something that is particularly sought after by young women these days, with their looks, make-up, body, lifestyle, boyfriend etc. It is a crippling pressure that creates very low self-worth and constant comparison, leaving no room to simply explore who they are and what matters to them in truth.
The coldness hardness and harm of competition is shown here for what it is and what children are subjected to from young. It is no wonder society is what it is and a sad but real reflection of life that is due for a change bringing in the love we all feel and are .
I agree with you Tricia, our children are subjected to these tests from young and it is heartless. I read recently that they are going to bring in tests for the four-year-olds by 2020. This is just an attempt to shut them down sooner.
Tests always feel as if there is a prevalent energy of judgment that feed the shocking cycle of perfectionism and need to be more in every way.
Yes Stephanie. It is just another way of saying that we are not enough just as we are, and that we have to prove ourselves by how well we do.
Anonymous you expose so well the coldness and hardness of competition. We are born knowing brotherhood and that we are all equal and so it goes against every cell in our body to think we have to compete against each other.
We are absolutely born knowing brotherhood, yet it is the society in which we live in and the schooling that polute our brains that we need to be competing against each other .
I agree Anonymous. I spent two years as a classroom assistant before taking a position as a private tutor in the classroom. It was plain to see right from the start that the stress and anxiety tests create completely mess up a person’s ability to truly learn and begs the question, “what is it that we are really testing?” When we put speed to the test, it encourages us to throw quality down the drain, hardly a skill worth celebrating.
Yes, they make learning much harder. I wonder why we haven’t found a better alternative?
Many times team building exercises are built around competition which inevitably leaves someone as less. We may put it down as a good laugh but at what expense to the body and what is it we have to override in order to go against our innate nature.
There’s an enormous amount of competition in our society, not just in tests but in comparing looks, jobs, salaries, family situations as well as relationships. We can approach the other billions of people on our planet for inspiration and learning, rather than wasting conversations on judgement and jealousy, bringing both parties down.
Competition and comparison stand hand in hand at the doorway to the human dysfunction. So much or our ill health, abuse, and lack of true purpose come from these twins and what is worrying is that in general society has not clocked the problem.
What a set-up, instigating a fierceness and every man for himself attitude that turns colleague against colleague and cares not about the repercussions within the team. Competition needs to be outed for the evil it is and articles like this go a long way to expose what is really running the world.
No wonder we have so much illness and disease in this world when ‘tests’ and completion are the norm.
I would say anxiety and stress is at high due to the pressures of tests.
“Contrived situations like this one remove us so far from this innate essence.”. Anything that takes us away from our essence is not worth doing.
So true, I agree with you Elizabeth, anything that takes us away from our essence is not worth doing.
Understandably there are times we need to assess whether we have the required level of knowledge or skill, for example to ensure a surgeon is competent before performing an operation however how we do this even more important. It is not the person who is undergoing a test but instead the level of skills etc. they have acquired. We cannot be measured, graded, banded or given value or quality from a test for we are already everything. It is up to us how much of this we choose to live.
“It’s only a test”, “it’s only a joke”, it’s only once”, “it’s only small”, often the prefix of “it’s only” is followed by an excuse as to why we aren’t taking responsibility for our actions. It would be much more honest and therefore evolutionary to out ourselves by saying “I’m doing it/it’s happening because………”
Anything that pits us against another is inherently evil and designed to introduce the illusion of separation.
“Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.” So true – seeing young children supporting each other, before the competitive element sets in – is a joy to behold -but it does set in quite early, depending on the role models surrounding them….
“However, the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else. ” This demonstrates how much we go into individuality and self when there is competition. I used to love sharing cooperative games with my children and their friends when they were young, rather than competitions – this back in the eighties……
We are so afraid of being wrong, of failing or admitting we don’t know or being last – to simply sit back and wait in a test like the one you describe, at ease with knowing you won’t win and your not sure how to take part is an amazing reflection of how you can have enough sense of yourself not to get lost in competition
Nothing is just a test, it’s horrible to feel what the purpose of this test was on your team, a very strange team ‘building’ expertise. When there is so much to be done in our world wasting a second of it in creating hostility artificially is really distasteful.
Now that would be an interesting and engaging school subject, Ariana, to discover more and more and deepen our understanding of who we truly are.
‘It’s only a test… ‘ great title because it’s way more than a test and what it incites in people. It reminds me of when I’ve heard people say, ‘oh it’s only a bit of fun’ regarding competition. I feel pitting yourself against people is fun I used to want to compete in ‘it’s a knock-out’ as it looked fun – aside from the physical brutality of being knocked about on the watercourse the game was set up to humiliate and laugh at the contestants. Often there is such discounting when people say ‘it’s only a bit of fun’ and actually this promotes people to not be so ‘soft’ as to feel quite the opposite.
Its sad to think what you so easily expose here is most people’s everyday reality, no wonder we have so much illness and disease, when we go against the natural harmony with another of course our bodies are going to respond by sending us messages that completion is not ok.
Its amazing the coldness that descends when competition is introduced to a situation
The impact of being put under competitive test conditions is so significant… I have been completely taken by it on many occasions and I love this article for exposing how divisive and destructive it is.
That’s the correct choice of words for competition – divisive and destructive and without any merit other than a few seconds in the limelight for the winner and doldrums for the rest.
The moment I make anything about time any sense of space disappears, I start to rush and my body feels the strain from doing so. It is no wonder that I get so exhausted at the end of the day. Learning not to rush is taking time as it seems so counter intuitive to what I have chosen to live.
Possibly we then have to set aside the current education methods and testing and grading systems as these do not correspond to the tender and delicate nature of our bodies.
What is it in men that likes to compete with one another while we are at best when we work together in brotherhood as we often can see when disaster strikes humanity?
Yes, the cooperation that sets in when disaster strikes gives me the sense that the world can get back on track. However, how long does that sense of cooperation last? Do people go on supporting each other after an event, or do we return to our old way of being and working – as individuals once more?
Our whole education system is based on a testing principle with exams and test in a regular interval. While we think this is normal because it is the way it is and because there is the idea that these test are needed in a way because we have demands on how people should be, want they should know and must be able to perform and from there have developed test to confirm the current status in someones development. But to me this has never felt appropriate, the tension and stress that comes with making these tests is just because there is that demand, that force to perform and in that tension we disconnect with the grander whole that really matters in life and truly will support us in any situation we will enter into. So in other words, this testing way of education system is robbing us from our true intelligence that this connection with the grander whole is and to me that is why humanity is considered to be so wayward at times.
When I hear a word like ‘test’ my body can immediately go into anxiety, I hate the feeling of having to compete with others and watching others fight to win. It is against our true nature and in the end everyone loses.
I don’t think we want to see or consider the enormous pressure that comes with knowledge and academia and this determining our lives. So the student who has great recall but knows how to abuse themselves becomes a doctor – and the student who is deeply self loving and caring with not great recall has to do something else. It is quiet scary how we have set up education and are not willing to look at it.
Competition is so embedded in our psyche that it does not take much to bring out this fierce competition between us. I was in a lesson today where a small quiz was played at the end and the class quickly went from quiet and what seemed to be a unification to sudden dog eat dog style competitiveness between each other. It makes me wonder how much we are moving in separation to each other if such competition could be “suddenly” expressed.
I was at my daughters sports day and the organisers started rounding up the dads to compete for points for their children teams and I could tell straight away that each dad started sizing each other up, it was supposed to be fun but that competitive thing came in like a flash and underneath it was deadly serious. It amazes me how on any level how competition can change us.
Simply reading this article I could feel the impact of this timed test physically. I wasn’t there but my heart tightened and I remembered all too well the physical sensation of performance anxiety. There are some really important questions asked here and we would do well to pose them on a broad educational and societal scale.
There is an excitement with those kinds of activities that will always leave most let down at the end. Its almost like the effects of coffee. Makes you race and excited then drops you so you are low afterwards. Even the person who ‘wins’ feels an awkwardness because they know that most are let down, disappointed and possibly feeling less. Really no one is a winner.
Competition and comparison always breeds separation. Are there truly ever any winners here ?
There are never any true winners in competition or comparison, they leave people separated and disconnected.
The evil of competition is exposed well in this blog and how it strips us of our true nature.
‘…strips us of our true nature’ and robs us of connection and brotherhood… yes truly evil.
When we say, ‘it’s only a test’ we dismiss all the unease, tensions, rivalries, disconnection to ourselves and others we feel in out body. This we then make the norm so that we no longer become so aware of the unease, tensions, rivalries, disconnection to ourselves and others. This is a tragedy because we accept and live a lesser way of being that is contra to our true nature.
There’s nothing worse than going for an interview and being told you have to do a test of some description, either written or typing. Especially as people are usually anxious before an interview, so they rarely perform at their best and being put on the spot just adds to the pressure. If the companies disclosed ahead of time that a test was required they wouldn’t receive very many replies.
Julie wow how strange not to share with someone you meet what is ahead, of course, on the one hand, I get that the purpose of an interview is to see how someone deals with different situations but what type of people are we really looking for? Those that are good at their job or those that can lift a company to the next level through their alignment to the purpose of the company?
Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way, oh how we get is so wrong. Just look at the lengths we go to and the money we spend in sport, to be the fastest, strongest or to be able to jump the longest or furthest. How much of this actually matters?
The more we reiterate the fact that it is our innate nature to cooperate, support and work together, the more we will see how insane so many of our social practices are.
I saw a very sweet video clip of 4 quadruplets about the age of a year and a half, playing a game of ‘cuddle my sibling’ each of them went in turn to hug a sibling and then they swapped to another partner. This game went on for ages with much joy and giggles. It just showed how much love is in our nature and that cooperation is so innate in us. Not one of these babies was concerned about who was stronger, taller or more dominant. Each was as equal to the other.
Thank you Anonymous for exposing so eloquently here how deeply harming these sorts of ‘tests’ are, what you describe here allows us all to see quite clearly the damage that also takes place not just to ones mental well being but also to their physiology when in competition with another.
The surprising thing though, is that day-to-day we don’t notice the harm, or the changes we make within ourselves when we do get into the competitive drive. Instead, we champion competition and tests, or at least accept them as part of life, ‘faite accompli’… it’s how life is so there is nothing we can do about it. By stopping, observing and recognising what is going on is a great first step in changing the status quo.
The whole big fat lie about ‘victory’ like a hunter standing on the head of lion – what is achieved through destroying another and lording it over them in their weak if not dead position. So yes, children are not killed in the process of an exam, or a sports games, but there are winners and losers, and I have two questions, for what purpose? And is it possible that the emotional scars run a lot deeper than most of us care to see, when it comes current education system? I do not criticise the teachers or the parents, who I know are largely doing the best they can, but I have a strong feeling that we do not have our priorities in the right place concerning our children’s long term wellbeing and so humanities wellbeing, long term.
Making life all about achieving through the pressure of tests and competition puts us in competition against ourselves, cutting us off from a deeper sense of who we are and what’s important in life.
The moment we are fixed on any goal, especially for self preservation or self success, we leave our beautiful connection with our delicacy, sensitivity, and love, and so cut ourselves off – not only from ourselves – but from others and all around us that makes living on this earth worthwhile. There is another way to survive — working together, being unattached to outcome so that new avenues of direction appear, and knowing we are all connected.
What a real exposing of the effects of tests and competition on us all espcially from a very young age so revealing and so sad to feel the separation and lack of love we foster and encourage in our lives in society today.
A really good lesson that I learnt at school was when we were asked to all replicate a plane made out of cardboard. We had to trace the wings, body and different parts, cut them out and put them together and see who could build the most planes in a certain amount of time. I think the best anyone did was complete one plane. Then we were asked to form groups and each choose to specialise in a task like one cut out the wings, one do the body and one put them together and one do something else but by working together we all managed 3 or 4 planes in the same given time. Working together was far more fun and the results explain all.
‘Healthy competition’ – what irony.
Competition is that instant hardness and self preservation that cuts off everyone but the goal
Since first reading this article, I have been noticing how environments and circumstances can affect myself and those around me, which is interesting because this shows just how much there is to respond to and as such – how one chooses to respond then goes on to create the next circumstance or environment that we all walk in to.
I have always loved learning, but have always felt distraught by the testing of how much I could repeat verbatim of what was taught. Life would have been so different during my schooling years if such a stress did not exist.
At the end of one of the courses I attended as an adult, we still had a test. The teacher explained that he simply wanted to know how well we had understood the topic. So we could take as long as we wanted and look anything up we felt was necessary. This was great because he had obviously considered the impact of the normal tests and was trying a different way.
That example and the conversation in this blog show how we need to keep assessing the real purpose of the various activities we consider ‘normal’ simply because we have repeated them so many times.
We would do well to consider more deeply the effects of our assessments of those in learning environments and courses – what are we really measuring?
Competition brings isolation, mistrust, contraction, separation, hardness, momentary relief, comparison, individuality, … Do we want this in our life? Do we want to offer this to our children? Do we want a society like that?
While it looks like we want to stand out, the main thing I get from competition is a feeling of joining in and taking part. I can see now this is such a lame, shoddy substitute from feeling connected in our heart. There’s nothing to join when you’re already a significant part of an amazing whole.
Often I hear people say they enjoy something that any physical body would detest, this intelligence that says such a thing is completely removed from the common and loving sense of the body.
What occurred in this ‘fun test’ reminded me a lot of what happens at school to our kids. Competition is applauded in education and used to motivate kids. I hear teachers say that this is the way to engage kids in an activity, competing to be the best. We are trained to enjoy this moment of being better than someone else and we can easily fall into it again, even when we normally wouldn’t act that way.
When in conscious presence with our body, it is easy to be aware of the pressures of being caught up in time or being timed to achieve something and we thus have the ability to choose to step back from this self-induced abyss of stress and frenzy to outdo another to come first.
Competition is rife throughout our societies and deemed as normal and healthy. This blog exposes this is a lie – as is anything that causes fury or separation from natural brotherhood that is known in our essence.
I was appalled when I was told that the children in the primary school where my children attend are encouraged to participate in a speed test. Children as young as seven are given the test. What does tests like this do for our kids? – create more competition and separation in the classroom? They are not ‘just a test!’ The tests put the kids under pressure to perform which can have a devastating impact on a child as they grow older. As a parent raising three children, two in primary school and one that has just gone up to high school, I am finding that it is imperative that we as parents, grandparents, friends, teachers are committed to support our children all the way through the education system.
“In between bouts of intense activity, a couple of them glanced at me to check out how I was going. There was contempt in their look that communicated ‘loser,’ derived from the mania they had gone into in order to complete the test successfully in super quick time.” – This sentence indicates just how much competition seems to snap people into a kind of ‘fight-or-flight’ adrenaline fueled state of being, almost like a ‘kill or be killed’ mentality. It’s reminiscent of someone in war, but to an obviously lesser extent, although the damage to relationships is massive any time we drop into that competitive ‘spirit’ (no coincidence that this word is used to justify it as the spirit is the aspect of us that will do anything to stay individual and not feel the oneness that is our true way with others).
The mentality of every man for himself is all to often utilised in business, pitting colleagues against each other for the best sales figures etc, and then at the same time, team work and all the buzz words that go with it is also seemingly upheld – these two things cannot live in harmony and actions and expectations speak far louder than the requisite but empty speeches about working together. We have to consider in the end what we value more.
There are so many mixed messages coming through in life. In our education system the values in a school often list caring, listening, supporting etc and then set the children up against each other in adversary positions. Relationships then easily move towards comparison, competition and bullying. Your observations of this experience amongst adults is clearly articulating the unnatural effects of setting people up in opposition and as adults we can have greater awareness of whats going on but with children I am wondering how they navigate these extremes. Great article offering so much to reflect on – Thanks Anon.
In school sports events and as a teenager, although awarded the ‘Victor Ludorum’ medal every year for coming first in the most number of athletic events, I did not participate to win, I just enjoyed taking part. As human beings we’re innately co-operative. Being forced to compete and see winning as the be and end all kills something precious and tender within us and pits us one against another.
Competition culture also thrives in everyday life. The urge to win cultivated since childhood for many of us now exploited in any number of ways including singing, dancing, cooking, let alone sport. The joy of participating in group activity without any desire of an end result or drive to win is now beyond the understanding of the the vast majority of people.
The question rarely asked when placed in this false ‘test’ conditions is ‘Why?’ ‘What is the purpose?’ either by participants or test organisers. Everyone follows blindly into these situations. This test scenario seems like a pointless exercise and damaging for all who take part.
I used to cry before and after tests, I got so tense. It felt unnatural. You can feel how it separates people and makes that 5, 30, 60 minutes etc the pinnacle. Pinnacles are unhealthy, we need steady consistency to support us, this is where the true wisdom is.
How can we place winning at the expense of disconnecting to another? It clearly exposes a lack of self-worth and love we have disconnected from within ourselves in favour of winning or beating another for if we were full of love we simply would not think never mind compete in competition with another; we would not feel the need as there would be not one ounce of investment in the outcome of winning.
‘Moreover, as an educator, this begs the huge question of what is occurring within our children and their bodies as they progress through an education system that measures progress through timed tests, which rank and order students’ scores – even as far as on a national scale – from the age of 8.’ This most certainly begs the question. I’ve worked in schools and have experienced the constant test children are under. Many can’t cope under the stress and their behaviour changes. I’ve worked with young children who have already given up on themselves and their abilities. ‘Tests’ don’t allow for learning just judgement. For those judged to be inadequate the persona can give up, for those judged to be adequate the tension remains as next time they may not do so well…No-one wants the look of disdain of being a ‘loser’.
Whenever I make something about time, I feel tension in my body as I’m so focused on the ‘deadline’ and what I need to do that there is no quality in what I’m doing.
Me too Fiona, it is crazy how much pressure we put on ourselves when we say we have ot do somethign by a certain time. Whereas when we just do it usually it is done much quicker anyway!
When school reports come back for our children we always direct the focus on to the ‘effort’ marks rather than the actual scores; appreciating the commitment that they have been making irrespective of the results.
This is a very obvious exposure of these not-so-hidden-traits. But what comes to my mind is that this play-out occurs in countless situations in our lives even when a stop-watch isn’t present. When push-comes-to-shove – as the expression goes – then peoples’ true colours are often exposed.
You can sense from this how in an ordinary instance you are an equal part of the group, but when asked to behave in a way that did not feel true or natural, you became the outcast, the odd one out. We can see here how group energy can be whipped up or even simply instructed into something that is so far removed from our natural way of being, and under the guise of training/assessment/development the large proportion ‘happily’ leave all that behind!
‘Our innate nature is to co-operate and to support each other in a loving way.’ This feels really true and shows how competition and division goes against our nature.
I can really feel reading this how harmful it can be to put us in competition with each other and how unnatural this is to our naturally co-operative and supportive way of being with each other.
Harming beyond words and a marker of how we model to our future generations.
I was that child who would crumble in a test but breeze through the course work. The two didn’t make sense and the cause of the problem was simple- the anxiousness and feeling judged and tested.
I know what you mean as soon as I am being tested or being watched I used to always crumble and think I was not good enough. It is interesting how just because the situation chnages we change. The more I have chosen to stay with myself in each and every moment the less the surroundings affect how I am.
It would be great to live in a world without competition of any sort except that which is healthy and stops companies having monopolies to control prices but I can’t help thing how things would be if all that energy was there for the benefit of everyone. The interesting line for me in this blog is how it turned your usually very amiable and supportive, good humoured work mates into totally different animals it just exposes the energy of competition.
Great observation, yes big clear signs that there is something that is not working concerning competition. There is no such thing as ‘healthy competition ‘ those words cannot and should not be put together,
Exactly, Kevin. The energy of competition exposes the very nature of itself by the ‘character’ change we go into when we align to it.
I can recall being in Spain some years ago and observing women at a market stall pushing and shoving and falling over one another to get to the goods as if there was about to be a shortage and each one wanted to get there first. There was no respect, no brotherhood and it felt awful after the polite queues I was used to in the UK. Competition of any kind is unpleasant to experience, I love it when everybody works together to achieve equal results for all.
It is awesome here that you really observed what was going on in this situation and did not just follow the crowd so to speak and responded in a way that did not join in based on what you felt was true for you.
We have come to believe that competition is good for us as it builds character, or so they say. But does it really. What sort of character are we building where we can crush another and then walk away knowing deep down that there is another person involved that we have harmed, and then getting patted on the back from our supporters. As children, we can feel that it is not natural for us to compete and yet we go along with it for the recognition.
While we all know from our inner most that competition takes us apart, what is it then in people that like to compete with one another?
The other day I was at a company that had a wall with a number of portraits of employees on it. They appeared to be the best employees of the year according the accompanying text. But what about the other 9000 employees that are equally contributing to the success of the company I came to ponder on. How would they feel to not have their portrait on the wall of fame? Will they either start to do their best even more, or will they give up, but both because of feeling less than the winners. But of course they also can see it for what it is, that it is about a competition that does not unite but separates.
A seemingly harmless activity highlights how harmful competition is as well as ‘going it alone’. We are not meant to go it alone. We are meant to work together in cooperation bring out the best in each other. This does not have to be perfect for we are not perfect, but no matter where anyone is in their capacity to work with other people it is still very possible.
Put lions in a colleseum and they will fight. Put humans in competition and they will do the same.
As an adult we can opt in or out of most tests or surveys based on choice of participation, and although doing degrees, masters, PhD’s and other qualifications still require a type of assessment we know that is part of the studying process. For children it is not a choice of whether they do examinations or not but a given, and so we have a greater responsibility to make the process fair for all and something young people can understand, because not every child finds these things easy or would ever choose to do them.
It is interesting how, when time is introduced with regard to racing against the clock, it is such a key part to making people change from helpful to competitive. Trying to keep up with something that continues without pause is something that creates a disconnection within oneself. I know if I have tasks to do within a certain time period, if I focus on beating the clock, I go out of rhythm and lose connection and can get all, get out of the way I have to do this task, and lose all connection with the space we all share and live in. I become linear and lose moving in consideration of everyone around me. I would say racing against time is how often the work places can become so stressful and unsupportive of people.
Yes, I agree, even the winners are harmed by competition, because it drives them further and further away from their true nature.
This is prevalent in schools and the marker of what we championed as academic success. Success of what in the long run?
Good question, Nattalija. What kind of future adults are we creating if we ask them to leave their sensitivity and awareness behind once they enter the school gates?
How long will it take us to become honest and truthful about how harming competition is and that our whole education system is based on competing, an energy that seperates us from young. When will we see that ‘Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.’
Competition compresses us and our body whereas in collaboration and unity we experience space and connection.
By working together hand in hand the greatest volume gets achieved and accessed. Everything is possible and more, if we but realise that we cannot and not need to do it by our own. Recognition and reward is just a mere satisfaction to the joy that is on offer, when we truly connect back to oneness we come from and work things out from there.
People often think, the best you can get out of someone is through competition. What quality of an end result has it, when you do something out of a push and to outdo another. You might get things done but the cycle of function, selling out, abusing yourself and not being seen as who you truly are gets fed, by championing a measure of results, instead of a quality of results.
Reading this I could feel how people seem to get ‘possessed’ by the competitive energy which is completely condoned and endorsed as a good thing since young. I used to thrive on it and that individualism now feels totally ugly – but I can still find myself falling for it, comparing myself with another, a desire to withhold support. So so ugly. So not to be fostered so young and so relentlessly.
Yes it is ugly to act, think or move in a way that is unnatural and a forced way of being. We do however all know there is a different way, and the worst part is that we still choose to denature ourselves and live a lesser version of who we truly are.
Why do we encourage competition when it is so harmful?
When we see the effect of competition on athletes years after they have finished competing, it is not an inspiring story.
This very much illustrates the toxic effects of competition and comparison… and how shallow and short lived a so-called victory truly is.
Spot on Paula, if only the same amount of energy and time used for sport and competition was used towards being more loving and supporting each other to evolve, what a different world we would live in.
It’s so horrible to feel what competition does to us, it literally destroys us – so fascinating that we champion this way of living !
‘Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.’ Which is so true as we see this when there are natural disasters, communities naturally pull together to support one another because it’s what we feel to do.
A fascinating observation of the energetic outplay of competition and the separation that follows.
Indeed as you describe how the situation unfolds Anon it becomes harder to see this group of people as adults but like the activity became an invitation for them to regress back to their school days.
Yes and when we know people for the beauty they are and yet they can act in this horrible way, it proves for me that everything that occurs is due to energy coming through us not that we are bad people.
What stands out for me in this article is how the people who took the test changed, and you were witness to this and while you have been able to observe your body and how it felt and how this experience made you feel and you are so beautifully skilled at expressing yourself, children who may be in the same situation are not often given this same care and support that you have offered here to yourself. This highlights how important it is to support children to express how they feel and what they can see happening in the world around them, as this can foster real understanding, no judgement and the development of true self-care.
“Our innate nature is to cooperate and to support each other in a loving way.” something that would be incredible if we all embraced and made it our everyday reality. Something so deeply powerful that it will transform society to the point where the real internal suffering need not be a reality.
Anonymous, the competitive test what you experienced feels cold and unnecessary, surely companies would want their staff to work together and support each other, rather than work in competition, it doesn’t make sense and creates division rather than harmony in a workplace.
I have been very competitive in the past due to involvement in sports and life in general but now, more and more so, I can feel how much harm this causes because it is the very opposite and draws us away from our most natural way of being in relationship with each other.
We want to be the “winner” because of our own insecurities, to win something proves that we are better than others and that gives us a sense of worth because as a society we have completely disconnected from this sense from within ourselves. We simply don’t know how to value ourselves so look for recognition on the outside, in order to get recognition in today’s society you must be “better than”, “doing something good” or “beating another at something” (just few of the most common examples i can think of). But this instills a deeper sense of insecurity each time we engage in this competitive behaviour, it disturbs us, it can make us wobbly – leading to a life under constant anxiety which many (if not the majority) of us live.
Yeah the need for recognition is pernicious and runs through everything we do that is why what Universal Medicine presents about going within making connection to the source of life is the key to escaping the traps of our normal.
This is the energy that gives us the celebrities, the champions, the best contributors, the golden medal winners, the winning companies etc. but in that we forget that 99.999% of the people are deemed to be the losers.
It would have been great to do a test straight after this one that involved everyone helping each other to achieve one goal and then get everyone to compare how they felt after each exercise. I can’t imagine any surprises in the outcome.
“From this four minute observation, it appears that we all need to consider deeply what occurs in these tests and the highly deleterious effects they have on all participants – including the ostensible winners.” Dear Anonymous I only can agree that most of us needs to stop and to feel into what is really happening in such a context and not to follow the mainstream meaning that this is what builds our character.
This is such an important enquiry – ‘How do we measure or even begin to understand the extent to which this ‘test effect’ is compounded many, many times over in such pivotal real life situations? Or do we merely witness the exponential rise in childhood mental ill health and youth suicide, feigning to not be aware of the causes?’ Let’s make sure we address these questions sooner rather than later…
We react to life by attacking each other when the only way out of here is to work together. The test described here exposes our driving philosophy in all its brutality.
We only have to listen to our body to know that any form of competition is not our natural way.
We will grab at any opportunity possible to seek even a split second of recognition and moments of false glory because it is missing out on the true form. It is pretty insane to settle for the false version of glory when we can access the real deal whenever we want. True glory leaves no-one out and is always completely inclusive of everyone.
Any form of competition puts stress onto our body. In order to compete, we have to harden our body, disconnect from it and an anxious energy kicks in immediately. On a wider scale competition creates disharmony and separation, and we can already see the damaging effects this has on our world, so why are we all not seeing how this activity is harming us?
All I can think about is how much energy is wasted competing with each other when if all that energy went into helping each other no one would go without anything and we would probably be much more advanced in more ways than one.
That test must be highly addictive for the participants to want to go back for more. It’s interesting how much we block out when our focus is on our addiction to an energy.
I am wondering what the addictive nature of this is… possibly it comes from the drive of not wanting to be at the bottom of the heap, or to not feel humiliation at being last? With this, comes its twin of dominance and superiority. So, it’s either feel that you’re not worth much because of failure or you feel superior because you got to the top. Is it the feeling of superiority that we are addicted to? Both scenarios do not offer connection, support and working together, only individualism.
Yes, Fiona, addiction is a suitable word to use as we get hooked on a false energy but then suffer the devastating consequences of abandoning ourselves.
‘However, the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else.’ when time is imposed on movements everything changes. Time is a great ally as a measure of cycles but nothing more. We would be far wiser to measure how much space we allow in what we do, rather than how quickly we do it.
Your description of the behaviours you felt seemed like it went on for far longer than 4 minutes and felt really disturbing. It’s really interesting to see how quickly we change when we make life about ourselves and competition. I wonder what impact this had on the team afterwards, rather than building relationships it no doubt chipped away at the companies foundation.
“It’s Only a Test….” – but at what cost to us and our state of wellbeing, the way we interact with people? Tests to test us on one upmanship never work. “Tests” of true love however are a different thing in there being a call to return to and to come back to the place of harmony that is love.
It’s very unnatural to take tests and to be able to perform well under that sort of scrutiny and pressure. Some do better than others and those that cannot are deemed as a failure, stupid and inadequate – you only have to watch the children during testing at school to see the distress it causes.
It’s super interesting that competition is used in “team-building” exercises – competition I find does the opposite, it breaks down a team and make you focus on just you and your progress rather than the whole picture and what is going on for everybody.
I remember that I had to complete a test at a sales meeting I attended. I refused to do the test which was over a 2 day period. So I was not allowed in the classroom I was segregated from everyone and had a black mark against my character. My boss was furious with me, I explained I felt the test was an expensive waste of time; it proved nothing and did not make anyone a ‘better’ sales person. Quite the opposite it builds comparison and competition. It turned out to be just what I said it was a very expensive waste of time, but management buy into these sales and marketing packages rather than supporting the sales team to build simple communication skills. Working in Sales is all about clear communication and people.
Anonymous what you have shared sounds anything but fun and great observation to see just how destructive these test can be. I hate these types of test for the very reason that as you say they separate us from one another and it fuels the comparison and jealousy the “look at me, I’m better than you” which is not the case at all as we all bring our uniqueness to everything we do.
This is a much needed conversation so thank you anonymous for taking up your pen to write about it. As a society I believe we put a huge strain on ourselves as adults and on our children by subjecting them to these ‘tests’. Just reading your blog I could feel the tension and the stress of having to complete something in a timed manner. We are after all not robots but deeply sensitive human-beings but we treat ourselves with such distain and abuse; as you say no wonder there is a rise in ill mental health across the board. Why do we do this to ourselves?
The insidiousness of competition and rushing is that this is believed to be our normal, that if someone actually connects to themselves and work in a pace that is supportive and nurturing to themselves and others, that this quality would be too stark a contrast to the mass choices and thus cannot be ignored. Connection is asked to be snuffed out and not poke its head in the abnormality of disconnection that we have made our every day.
For me the worst case is feeling being pushed. This makes me react and retaliate and want to withdraw from life. I’m learning that in these situations I have to first honor myself deeply and rebuild a feeling of spaciousness within myself. I will not be able to do everything the world expects of me and that is okay.
When we squeeze time and rush, space is being compacted and the unease comes from the lack of spaciousness..
Some of the most ‘intelligent’ people are seen to be the least ‘street smart’ or ‘approachable’ people, but certain people will value street smartness as intelligence and mainstream academic knowledge as not important. This just goes to show the wayward approach we have to intelligence and I can imagine that comparison simply makes this even more complicated and confusing.
Yes, this is a great observation and example of how quickly we abandon ourselves under the right incentive, pressure or goal.
I never did well in tests. so much pressure on having to remember so much in such a short space of time. The intelligencoe of the body is so much greater than the so called intellignece of the mind anyway, we should be questioning what it is we are trying to prove by being able to remember more facts than another person as all it really does in the long run is seperate people.
What energy are we aligning to when we create such tests? Not one of Love that is for sure.
Was that a test (of what, precisely?) or an incitement to fight?
There can be no harmony in competition.
What an experience and thank you for bringing your observations here. The sense of going through schooling for a legal minimum of 12 years and some into 20+ voluntary years in that undercurrent of competition and isolation the prevalence of self-harm, anxiety, depression and mental illness, is no surprise… let alone the bullying, gangs and cliques that are a ‘normal’ part of school life. When we are consistently and continuously steeped in such rotten poison, poison because it is not our natural way, we are being denatured to the point we no longer live what our true naturally loving nature is. it is incredibly sad.
The pressure is extortionate, I remember well, feeling panic and not feeling able to deal with the force of some exams. I am learning to not get caught in the panic these days, however the harm and imposition this places on our younger generations is without question unavoidable, unreasonable and unnecessary. Yes we need to know if someone can do their job etc, but this is achieved through ongoing observation and evaluation not one exam.
Very true Alison, with competition there are never really any real winners. I know for myself when I have won things often it creates more of a separation with others than before I won which shows the futility of it. We do it for acceptance but then almost get ostracised for being too good and winning.
So true Fiona, we are designed and here to work together, anything which pits us against each other is a complete contradiction to the very nature of our essence. You only have to look at children to see how naturally we can work and play together when we take needing to be anything or prove ourselves in anyway out of the picture.
Competition of any form is harmful, it can be exhilarating for a split second but it actually causes our body to harden, our nerves to be on edge, our entire body to become racy and comparison and jealousy kicks in.
What a great observation and how very revealing how we have set ourselves up to compete and fight.
Competiton is one of those hidden evils -we think it is healthy – we encourage it . and yet it goes against our very essence. We are designed to work together not to compete.
It’s a great discussion, if we know the true qualities of human beings, including harmony, co-operation, gentleness and care and we see that go out the window in tests for the sake of competitiveness, then we should question what these activities do to human relationships and their validity in life.
That is key is it not Melinda, the ability to question what we are doing, the willingness to connect to who we truly are and then lay the two side by side…much can be revealed about our current way of life, values, habits and cultures in this way.
An open question: what is the quality of the completed work like when competition is what has driven the outcome?
The beauty of no competition is seen in disaster relief – just working together to support each other. When will we learn this is possible outside the disaster impact zone?
It is crazy that a team building exercise should pit people against each other in such a damaging way and exposes the lack of value in such activities before you even consider the impact on those taking part and how the team moves forward together after such an experience.
It didn’t seem to be a team ‘building’ exercise …
Great point, that if in just 4 minutes competition can obliterate relationships, what is happening to children and young people who are constantly put under the pressures of exams and competitive sports etc.?
“If one four minute test could generate so much competitive angst, intensity and social isolation, what effects do the multitude of tests in education have on our children, their bodies and their world view..” – and even Anonymous, this 4mins test is but a microcosm within the macrocosm of life where many of us live life in continual moment by moment competition/competitiveness either with ourselves or with others and in this heightened stimulated state it’s no wonder why or how come we do have such a depressed state of being, find collaboration with others difficult, suffer internal distraction and unrest. Living life in this ill quality is not sustainable; in the end there is large scale suffering from it.
Anonymous, what you experienced sounds anything but ‘fun’ and not at all ‘developmental’.
The wealthiest man in the world that owns the largest internet shopping site, here in the UK has delivery drivers paid by what they deliver! Time is, literally money! Every moment of your working day, no matter how long, would be against the clock! How many other white van men and women are on the road interreacting with us?
Winning a test doesn’t give us anything that is sustainable because it is just a recording of a moment where you happened to be the fastest, best, most clever and so forth yet it never gives us something substantial to have in life that we did not have before we won. For instance our quality of life is not suddenly going to change by winning the test, if we had negative thoughts before we most likely still have them after and so on.
These sort of tests seem to really ignite our spirits, the part of us that love individuality and the fact is it is in all of us to be competitive, some more than others and that is how we get the winners and losers of this temporal world but none of which would ever exist if we were all connected to our souls, we would all be winners then no one left behind.
Everyday, every moment is a test to see if we will stay connected to truth, brotherhood and oneness or sell ourselves out for individuality’s crown. As soon as we go into being separated with another the true test in life is failed. We’re not penalised though but just get to have another go.
Up until only a few years ago I would have periodic recurring dreams about being back in a primary school or college classroom during a test and being in a panic as I had either forgotten to study or it was a surprise quiz (the most dreaded type). So obviously this was showing me something about how I still held in my body a sense of anxiety or anxiousness revolving around the educational system and how it is constantly demanding its students to prove themselves and live up to other people’s expectations of them before ever actually stopping to appreciate the child for who they are. This blog was excellent in how it clearly shows the immediate negative effects of imposing a competition-based approach to learning.
“Anything that encourages us to pit ourselves against one another cannot be truly evolutionary”, particularly in light of the fact that there is no such thing as another, there is only the collective us.
Sitting exams has become a very accepted and standard part of our lives and yet when you really consider what is involved, they are a very random and abstract adjunct.
Competitiveness isolates and separates us, collaboration and cooperation unites us.
I really enjoyed the words you chose to highlight here and in their origins how they illustrate exactly what you portray: competition – strive for, and eventually, rivalry, you can feel the distance and separation needed for this word to develop. And the warmth in collaborate – work, together.
It’s a simple formula and one that we would do well to seriously consider… for what end result do we really want?
And the purpose is what? This sort of method is used in the education system a lot and it has not true purpose. Being purposeful is about unity, understanding a shared goal that supports all, separation, betterment and individualism.
I love your sensitivity and awareness that you could observe with such insights as to what was going on around you.
I read a report recently presenting that academic pressure is becoming one of the top causes of mental health issues in young people in the UK, and this increase has been since the UK government introduced performance rated pay for teachers. We have seriously got our priorities wrong!
I talk to my children about this sort of pressure and that it is well worthwhile not ignoring, but instead being honest about how it feels. Also I talk about being aware of what there is to appreciate, for example, some children have no safe place at home or at school to speak about their feelings or feel met for who they are and with our children, they have a place at home to talk about how they feel and we understand from our own experiences what it can be like in school. It is s important we engage with each other about the system and what feels in honesty like it is not working.
The pressure children and teachers are now facing in school has got out of hand. With pay performance related pay, attainment results in English and Maths the all of the everything, data king and a reduction to the arts, panic and fear led by Ofsted inspection, children and teachers sit in a pressure cooker. It is no wonder that mental ill health is on the rise. Apparently 40,000 teachers left the profession last year… unfortunately children are obliged to stay and have no choice in the matter.
I had no idea that teachers are on performance based pay. Is that across all schools both private and state in the U.K.? Why is it that we are now turning education into a commodity, no wonder children are being severely impacted by the pressure.
Trying to win is like an end-less ladder to success and eventually we miss a step and fall to feel the ramifications of each step taken that is not True for the Brotherhood we all come-from and are re-turning to. And as we get to the so-called top everyone is hanging on by their finger-nails with anxious, addictions, depression and being unsure so we become afraid to let go.
The sooner we let go and take those steps that are needed for us to be moving in a true direction the simpler our life becomes as we see everything very clearly with our feet firmly on the ground so our movements align to our Soul and then this could be described as the True-ladder-to-success.
Just reading this, I got a sense of how ingrained that ‘test mentality’ really is.. I left school 20 years ago, and university 15 years ago, yet I still have an inner drive to be the best version of myself – to work the hardest I have ever worked in my life, to prove to myself that yes – I can do it. Do what, and for whom, I find myself asking. My colleagues are all pretty relaxed so I know it’s a pressure I put on myself. There’s no test, yet I turn every day into some kind of competitive batttleground against my inbox and the work that I have to do…a battleground against myself. When it’s me versus me, we both lose. In that, I lose connection to myself, and others, and become blinkered, hard and cold.
This is, thankfully, slowly changing, as my body (exhausted) is showing me that it’s so clearly not working, and is pretty much forcing me to slow down by refusing to be pushed at 100mph. The more I make my job about people, and not perfection, the more I enjoy it, feel relaxed and feel myself – and that brings about a natural openness and connection with others.
It really is about remembering what matters in life: people, and connection to ourselves and others. When I forget that, then my job feels loveless, cold and hard – it’s not really my job, but me feeling that within my job. When I remember it, suddenly there’s a natural ease and flow, and enjoyment – mistakes matter less, and we just get on with it. How we are with our work and jobs is how we are with our lives. Replace ‘job’ in the sentences above with ‘life’, and the same applies.
The tension that going against our nature and our essence brings to the body is immense and we have to put in a lot of effort to override this and pretend we like competing with each other.
Competing with others can be very addictive and we can be fooled to think we like it because when you win it gives you a false sense of feeling like you are on top of the world but that soon comes crashing down due the nature of the energy we align to to be competitive.
As a group or a team we are strong, simply because we all bring our unique qualities. Each team member is needed and we don’t all need to be perfect in everything. Taking this into account our learning process would entail really different offerings to learn this and testing everyone on one aspect is not part of that.
I have been noticing more and more how just comparing ourselves with one another, and in fact even to a picture which we think we should be like, is one of the most debilitating things ever. In one quick swoop I end up judging myself as not good enough unless I achieve such and such, all my attention channeled into a drive to achieve this very narrow band of expression at the expense of pretty much everything else.
And so astutely observed here, add competition to the mix and it is a perfect remedy for people to abandon the sensitivity and brotherhood that we could all be otherwise expressing.
How quickly the pack instinct for survival of the fittest comes to the forefront and the care and support for others just flies out of the window in an instant. Thank you for sharing this Anonymous and more importantly confirming the wisdom and understanding in your choice for non-action in this event – we don’t have to choose to be part of this destructive way of being that continues to come up in everyday life whenever competition and being better than others is the focus.
Yes it was great that you chose not to engage with this competitive energy that had nothing to do with building team rapport.
Absolutely Stephanie. We can stay true to ourselves even though it is going against the grain. WE can also by our movements show there is another way.
Education, work and in so many ways life has been created to work like this so it’s no wonder so many people put so much energy into trying to opt out. In truth there is no opt out though, only choices which will either bring a reflection of greater truth to the situations we encounter or, if not doing this, to further fuel the energy which builds and maintains them.
How truly “loving” are the team before partaking in such an exercise? I question whether it was true love or whether it was actually comfort because if there was a foundation of true love within the team there would not be the propensity to suddenly separate and complete against each other.
“Or do we merely witness the exponential rise in childhood mental ill health and youth suicide, feigning to not be aware of the causes?” Only when we really look at what’s going on in our bodies and truly be honest what is going on around us, near us and in us will we feel how much we have to change within to change the world.
“So why do we do continue to endorse such tests and force them onto our children?” Must be a defect deep within our spirit that needs the attention, the recognition to know itself by, instead of knowing oneself to be enough as it is.
These so-called team building exercises are so common in the workplace. Years ago when I worked in HR we had to come up with these activities for the group interviews, essentially to sort the ‘wheat from the chaff’ as the saying goes. It’s no different than physically fighting for a job; it was to prove how hungry you are for the job and how driven you are at the expense of others – all in the name of sales.
“However, the moment that the timer started, they became very intense and their movements hard, forceful and excluding of everybody else.” what an amazing observation, such everyday activities create the separation we so often try hard to avoid yet instill at the same time.
Being rushed, forced or imposed on a rhythm which is not naturally ours for a goal that is from the outside is a very harming thing. It is very simple as no one when honest enjoys being rushed.
Yes and if we are honest we can feel this force or imposition in our bodies.
Flash backs to school exams and having to go in and sit 3 hour long papers it was hideous. I simply couldn’t handle it and yes in that time for studying and lead up to it you lock yourself in your room, do what you can and then hope for the best, all the while making yourself feel like a nervous ball of reck. It’s all about isolation and intellectual skill and prepares us for the ‘future’ in a way that is deeply disconnected to who we truly are and how we can work together.
Thank you Anon for your descriptive article. And this is 2018 and we are still dealing with gladiator experiences in our work life and we hold we are a civilized society of people. Hmm…I feel we are sadly missing something here.
If this display of human behaviour over wanting to win a four-minute game is being held in one location, it is sure to be taking place in many others, in various formats. Therefore, it is no wonder the world is in the mess it is in, when seemingly civilised human beings can lose all sense of themselves over something that has no life enhancing impact on the greater plan unfolding in the world. In these situations, brotherhood which is our natural way of being, is utterly absent and we all suffer, whether we realise it or not.
How can we be getting ahead if all we are doing is going round and round the same sun, living the same day, always with an opportunity to live it all, or see how we get nudged off track. Better to focus on that quality every day.
This is the way our whole education system, sport and to a greater or lesser extent work are all configured. Every man for himself and that there are winners (1) and losers (the rest). Its a crazy setup.
This reveals very clearly that it is only when we all reach an equal level of understanding – group work – that true purpose is met.
True wisdom does not know any time . It can only unfold by space. The moment you get locked into time, you disconnect from what you are and what can come through you.
Yes I agree these corporate team building exercises to develop “one’s resilience” and “enhance cooperation or cohesion” do nothing else but ensure that competitiveness remains the driver of a person’s life… a driver in which at some point suffers and inevitably gets crushed by that they end up crashing their ‘car’ symbolically their body. Injury is not at all fun.
Yes I agree these corporate team building exercises to develop “one’s resilience” and “enhance cooperation or cohesion” do nothing else but ensure that competitiveness remains the driver of a person’s life… a driver in which at some point suffers and inevitably gets crushed by that they end up crashing their ‘car’ symbolically their body. Injury is not at all fun.
What you experienced anonymous seems to be the opposite to team building, it seems to separate the team and cause rivalry – I am surprised that this approach was used as this would not make for a harmonious workplace and sense of working together and supporting each other.
Anonymous, thank you for sharing your observations of a timed, competitive event. This does make me reflect on the effects of tests on children and how unnatural this is for them.
Why do we continue with these tests and force them onto our children and not only continue but seem to bring in more testing. Maybe those who make the rules were effected in such a way by such tests that they want to spread the ill effects. It does seem like almost everything on this plane of life we live in from education to music is set up to keep us as far away as possible from who we truly are.
What is it in people that likes to compete and wants to be the winner? To me this is not its true nature but just a habit that has its roots in the eagerness of creation many people do strive for.
We really have to look at the way we educate our children as putting them under continuous test will definitely have its effect. We as adults are the living results of these practices and I must say that I have put aside a lot of my playfulness in order to make me to comply to the demands of the system. Therefore we have to ask ourselves if that is really worth all the effort that is being put into education? For me it is not.
There’s a certain type of consciousness that comes with, ‘it’s only a test’ and it’s everything you describe, anonymous. When saying this to any primary class I have taught children automatically go into anxiousness and not feeling good enough. When I had to test a year 1 class, (six year olds) for their very first spelling test the tension in the room was palpable. I explained to them (from my whole being… and they were scrumptiously gorgeous) that I loved them the same even if they got them all wrong or all right, it didn’t matter the score only that they gave it a go and had done some prep work beforehand. They didn’t get it… the anxiousness was embedded. I said it two more times and on the third go, the penny dropped that I really meant it didn’t matter to me what their end result was and that I loved them regardless. On the third expression, the whole class simultaneously let out a sigh of relief, dropped more into their bodies, relaxed and we then got on with the test. This example just highlights to me how strongly the feeling of not good enough and fear of failure tests brings. For these little ones, they really felt that the amount of love and recognition on offer was linked to how well they did… and this is, in truth a common feeling for many because, we as adults only praise kids for when they do well.
The moment the energy of separation enters the equation we are reduced to our lowest common denominator and robbed of our universality; which is the Oneness we are and are from.
Being a bit long in the tooth, I have had a lifetime of required tests to complete, many work related. There was one qualification that required retesting every three years that required three days of class work to prepare for the exam that would highlight changes, but it was still; a wink, wink, nod, nod… teaching the test. There was no computation of getting the highest score, for the result was pass or fail, so a 100 or a 70 was just a pass!
Yes Doug. Society in its current format is proof of what results from our heedlessly following the well-worn path of trying to fit in and not discerning what is truly being asked of us under the guise of competition.
Elizabeth it was a joy to read what you have expressed here absolutely nailing the energy of this and exposing so clearly that it is all about individuality and just how evil this is. Something I feel we have a long way to go in truly understanding and having awareness of as a whole.
Thank you for exposing the true evil of competition and the increasingly damaging effect that this is having on our children.
A few years ago, I had to sit for an exam after almost 30 years of not having one, and I still remember how horrible it felt in my body to be put under so much pressure to complete a series of tasks within a set time frame. I could feel so clearly that it was not to evaluate our proficiency, but it was to evaluate how much we would be willing to abandon ourselves in order to prove ourselves. But when you described how your colleague said they enjoyed it, I can actually relate to that elation and how much I used to need that to feel like I was worth something.
It is important for us to beware of how we feel in situations, we often try and override our feelings, but not dealing with feeling tension in an exam, means we carry it with us and it impacts on our life, we carry the hurt. Great as you are doing being aware of the harm it can cause if we are not being observant of how we feel.
If you can imagine the sea racing it’s waves to see who gets to land first you begin to understand the absurdity of the competitive way we currently exist.
We are going to get there anyway, just like a wave will reach the shore all we have to do is surrender and bring 100% of us without investment.
Yes! I was thinking about how there is a forceful tide of competitiveness and ‘healthy competition’ we will all have been enveloped in – and that by simply recognising how it makes people change and how it separates us is the start of a shifting tide. So it’s therefore our responsibility to hold ourselves steady in these competitive moments to not take part. Only then can the shift begin.
I love the analogy Joseph and shows quite how absurd any form of competition really is.
Great example Joseph, it is pretty insane to see how far we have strayed and nature constantly reminds us of our natural way.
‘It’s only a…’ is a phrase we use to dismiss the intensity of what is being performed or offered, as in ‘It’s only a joke’ when a hurtful comment was made or, ‘It’s only a game’ when there are winners and losers. We cover up the harm we do with our words but the harm is still there, the words are meaningless.
“So why do we do continue to endorse such tests and force them onto our children?” because anonymous, unlike you, most people don’t allow themselves to feel the truth of any given situation.
Oh my goodness what is shared here is huge! How much of the every man for himself and the disdain and lack of appreciation for working for the benefit of the All is promoted and fostered by how we set up our education?
So true Golnaz. We will always evolve when we come together, co-operate and work as one. We only need to look at how we are in natural disaster situations to see this in action. Unfortunately here we are almost put into a position where there is no other option. But given that this is one of the only times that we do in a community type way, then its no surprise that these incidents are increasing.
Generally speaking our education system sets up and champions the pursuit of individualisation and triumph over others. These things have to be taught into a person because they’re not innate.
Seems crazy really that we have team building exercises where we are competing against each other to prove we are more intelligent than another. All the time missing out on the natural intelligence of our whole body intelligence and living in harmony.
I remember my daughter playing with a boy building towers from block and then pushing them over. Then the boy wanted to keep the blocks for himself and build his own tower she watched him then just pushed it over they both looked at exch other and then started building together again without a word spoken. I loved it as it showed they knew the truth that separation is not it.
And then what about sport – that is a HUGE one. As teams and individuals are pitched against each other ALL the time.
Sadly this is the risk of what we call in when we compete. We make it about the best rather than the people. What a great way to observe this and not get involved but to just feel what this drive does to people.
I agree with you Gill, I felt quite sick as I read this blog, it obviously brought up things that I remember from my childhood, I hated testing time. I realized just how much it damaged me and I have hated competition all my life obviously have always known that was not the way to be truly living life. I have always felt and known in my body that we need to be co-operating together in all the tasks needed to be done.
Measuring each other´s functionality is so much against our true nature of appreciating and supporting each others unique qualities and expressions. It is a falsity we choose that keeps us in a mere reduction of our grandness and will never lead us nowhere- only through equality we will move together in the true direction of evolution.
That is a great question you are asking here- I remember hating it being in such a tension to perform. But I also have to admit that there was a part in me, that wanted to get the recognition of being the best. The only way to free ourselves from joining such a contest is a deep knowing that we are already enough and outstanding, without needing to outdo another and get recognition by that. How evil and sad to feel better, because another was less ” good”.
Recognition is a fleeting moment! When just coming over the line meets the requirement, you pick up with experience as you go, like a driver licence test!
I do know that to, that temptation to go into competition and in wanting to be the best. When we go into that type of energy I must say that as a human you get completely lost because you try to be something that you are not only for the recognition and reward. You actually sell your inner stillness to the mentally driven way of life, a way of life that is striven for by many people.
What kids get put under in school is horrendous, but then as adults we buy into the same system that crippled us.
Because it gives us a sort of relief and security to walk with labels instead of embracing the vastness we are. It identifies us, which seems for our mind more exciting than truly surrendering and through that to connecting with everyone, where everyone is equal. The moment we pay the attention to us, that we seek from others & reveal that nothing from the outside can truly make us joyful, the system will change.
Usually the winner doesn’t feel that great either as they then have to deal with everyone’s envy. The attraction of competition is that it induces a forceful numbness and gives a lot of temporary and also numbing energy. It is a respite from feeling what is happening around us and there is a hope of things being better in future.
I had a similar experience not to long ago when there was a simple test with a group of people aimed to see what they knew about the business they were aligned to nothing other then that safe for a bottle of beer that would be the first prize. There was a big screen that would show the ranking throughout the test. But the competition immediately kicked in and it was as in your example, astonishing to observe what happened. Some people hardened and went into a super form of focus, ready to ‘shoot from the hip’, others kind of withdrew, one young lady was beside herself, as if it was a competition where she would stand the lose her life if she did not rank high. To me this shows what the educational system has installed in us for from a very young age we are told that much is dependent on how we perform in tests and competition.
Anon I love how clearly and unmistakably you spell out for everyone the exact consequence of competition. It is immediate separation from and often opposition to our fellow human beings. And isn’t much of life set up like a test? Not only if we will perform but if we will be liked and/ or accepted? It makes it nearly impossible for us to come out of the deep separation we find ourselves in.
“And isn’t much of life set up like a test?”, great question Carolien and I would say that yes, absolutely life feels like a constant test for most of us. The feeling that we are constantly trying to achieve or match up to others is a very common one. We strive to be the winner at work, the winner in our social group, the winner in the families, we compete against others at the gym, with our homes and pitch the achievements of our kids against the achievements of our friends kids. Being tested, being compared, competing are all feelings that are very common to most of us, so common in fact that we don’t question them.
It is never ‘only a test’ as it’s entire design is to measure, define, delineate and box whoever is taking the test. No matter how playfull or insignificant it is portrayed to be there is always a consequence in how we are labelled, seen, approached, communicated to etc. It is very rare that we as human beings, who are always trialing and testing ourselves internally can truly let go of any outcome of any test.
What you described here, anonymous, has become so common in our world and so accepted that most people don’t clock the difference in their body and in the group. We are not made to work alone, only together things can change and how important is it to educate this to our children.
I is fascinating how so often we can change our character simply to win something even if there is no real prize other than praise! I had an experience earlier in the year where we had these quizzes and fastest to the buzzer, for me it was very simple easy questions as it was about what I have been doing for the past 7 years whereas for others it was all new to them. So I was pretty much getting every question right. I almost wanted to get something wrong to fit in but thought thats just silly. So what if other people make remarks. For me though it is more about how everyone who does not win feels deflated even if only slightly which is something I hate.
And remembering that those that do not win is the whole group except for 1 winner. Its like making climbing to the top of the mountain the pinnacle experience, rather than enjoying every step of the journey.
There is an emotional rush that comes from competition that generates a feeling of individuality which masks the actual task at hand. It is like a layer that is added to what is physically taking place. In the likes of sport the impact of any sport on ones health and well being would make anyone question whether it is true for them to do if they were truly in their body, and not caught in the emotional stimulus that the competitive nature of sport brings. This is the exact same thing here. Hence it is not the test that is the issue but the energy that is underneath it.
I couldn’t agree more Anonymous. Your colleagues natural way of being together was put to the side and the competitiveness of testing kicked in from past experiences. Each one of them would have their own story with tests and how they felt at school and you would have watched it all play out. I know for me, I de-tested tests and would be so nervous that I would forget so much and sit there thinking the worst thoughts about myself for not doing well. As you say, we can’t just go around saying to our children ‘it’s just a test’ anymore, as this follows them around throughout their life rearing its ugly head when things like this come up, until we all realise we are not that.
What you describe sounds more like a battle field than an office setting; it is remarkable how quickly colleagues can turn on each other and try to elbow their way to the top.
I remember when I did my French O Level exam they had a grade F for Fail and H for worse than fail probably was Horrendous. I got an H and was quite proud that at least if I was going to fail I would do it fully.
That grade also left the teacher as a failure – too many Fs and Hs and their reputation suffers. Interesting that the smartest person in the room got the worst grade.
This is very similar to some children’s board games, such as ‘Risk’ where one has to try and conquer the entire ‘world’ in the game and take over other people’s countries. Does it bring people together, or cause tension and force them apart?
Great point, Susie. Most people consider boardgames to be harmless, but they too have the ‘them and us’ mentality because of this inbuilt competition factor. It’s no wonder our young are reeling in anxiety when you take a step back and look at everything they are subjected to in the name of education and/or fun.
These competitive tests are definitely not great for teamwork. A team of people on a racing yacht might work together as a team but they are in competition with fellow sailors and that’s a suprememacy situation of ‘us’ and ‘them’.
Could a major cause of the rise of mental ill health in children be due to a to parallel increase in school tests at an increasingly younger age and more frequently? This article would certainly indicate this.
Great point, Jonathan. This rise of anxiety can’t just be a hapless coincidence. Statistics show a different picture, as the increase in school testing at an increasingly younger age and frequency is definitely in sync with the rise of mental ill health in children. Children from so many countries who have been subjected to this type of testing regime are the living proof that this rise in anxiety is indeed fact.
When are the powers that be going to wake up to seeing how detrimental this is to both the current and future well-being of our students?
As I began to read what you were sharing here this is exactly the same question that came to me ‘this begs the huge question of what is occurring within our children and their bodies as they progress through an education system that measures progress through timed tests’ and I think it is actually starting younger than 8 now. Which is ridiculous, in fact it is all ridiculous as when we look at the world we are living in and the complete mess we are in has ANY of this made a difference. The very real answer is … No! We have seriously got to see the damage this does and just how unsupportive it is.
The whole ‘survival of the fittest (or smartest)’ competition thing has been applied to a species that doesn’t work that way. If human beings where solo creatures then fine it might hold some merit. But the fact is we are social and work together naturally and competition is unnatural to us.
when we put each other in boxes, lovelesss positions, to win someone or something over. is the biggest separation, no matter who introduces it.
Some excellent points made here Anonymous, it is devastating to see what we put our children through during their schooling years. What also occurred to me is that we do hold the memory of those tests in our bodies because even fifty plus years I still have a vivid feeling of taking a typing exam with the William Tell overture clicking away on the teachers’ desk and playing a lot faster than I could physically type.
Sounds like a nightmare and I am sure it was; setting a tempo that no-one can keep up with is like thumbing one’s nose at the students who are left feeling inadequate and inferior.
It does stay in our bodies and there are many ways we can try numbing it out or getting rid of the excess. I can remember after I finished school, waking up having a nightmare that I didn’t finish an assignment or I didn’t hand in a project and I was going to fail. And I wasn’t a student who strived to get top marks. I know many others who also shares stories like these.
To see what we go into and how we behave when competition is thrown into the mix is a shocker; more so, is that we don’t see or feel the hardness and isolation we put ourselves into and then say that we enjoy it. In the UK, children are baseline tested at the age of 4 and sit national exams at the age of six/seven. If we put in the social media mix and the pressure and competition children face at school then is it no wonder we are seeing a sharp rise of children on stress medication, sleeping medication and children who are self-harming.
Absolutely well said Rachel, no suprise indeed, but more so it requires us to become honest and open to see why things are now the way they are and what we can truly do about it – is our responsibility to take this seriously individually too.
Very beautiful – it’s profound how ingrained this ‘getting ahead’ is for us. All that happens is we go into our head at the expense of our heart and our natural love for others.
Very true Joseph and as soon as we go into our head and lose our connection with others then our behaviour completely changes and really anything is then possible, even completely unthinkable things can take place.
And we really think we got ‘somewhere’ at the expense of leaving ourselves and the love we naturally feel inside.
How can we be getting ahead if all we are doing is going round and round the same sun, living the same day, always with an opportunity to live it all, or see how we get nudged off track. Better to focus on that quality every day.
Such a great point, Anonymous. Just your description of what happened to your body and in the bodies of the ‘competitors’ is enough to indicate the accumulative harm we are causing by insisting on this way of proving our so-called intelligence.
In the world there is most of the time if not always someone to fall back on if we don’t know, someone to call in or ask for support. Especially in situations where there is an apprentice there is always a supervisor around to ask for support so why are we indeed training ourselves and each like there is no one to work together with? Life is not lived in isolation so we need to actually learn how to work together much more than how to do things on our own as generally we are very good at that.