My gorgeous husband continuously surprises me with his level of openness and willingness to deepen the love in himself and in our relationship. I am forever in appreciation and awe of this and I admire that when I present more love, there is not an ounce of resistance in him to going deeper. For me, this is the confirmation of how powerful the expression of love is: it is supportive, beholding and asking us to further question, unfold and return to the greatness we are all actually from.
For the first time in this life I feel that I am in an intimate, fully committed relationship with a man where we treat each other as equals: we are each unique, we each have our own offerings and strengths in our relationship as we do have areas we each need support with.
However, together we are on the path to be all that we can be with each other, all others, and ourselves in every part of our day. This is an appreciation of him and for him, but also of myself and my deepening commitment to living and being the love that I am in full.
My gorgeous husband is tender, deeply considerate, unimposing, loving, gentle and super caring. He is a powerhouse, he has the ability to unify and gather people, to relate caringly with them and build strong relationships. He is able to see, feel, nominate, and clearly voice his feelings of how things have played out the way they have. He is able to acknowledge when he is wrong and to speak about areas he wants to place more loving attention into.
These are all qualities that I see and appreciate in him but at times he does not see in himself, or have appreciation for . . . and he is aware of this. I fully understand how this can happen and have felt the same in myself too. I totally love his honesty as he chooses to move forward with now bringing appreciation of himself; as he continues to self-care and deepen his relationship with himself, he develops an ever growing presence.
All of this has unfolded with a loving rapidity for him in the past year and I fully admire him, also appreciating the level of love that is now available for us all to connect to and choose in our way of living.
This is a dedication to the love and openness of my husband, and the unending love from Our Soul, always calling us to be more love.
In deep appreciation of Serge Benhayon and the presentations of the Ancient Wisdom and Universal Medicine for reflecting this love to me. This consistent reflection has supported my journey that began eight years ago by reconnecting to the love that I am, to me, and to my greatness. Now we live that love in our family, at work, with our friends and in our lives.
Forever learning and unfolding . . .
By Johanna Smith, Bachelor of Education
Further Reading:
Soul
Appreciation in Relationships
How many Marriages & Relationships have been Improved?
749 Comments
I just love this it is so great to feel the love and appreciation you have for your husband, it is so very refreshing to hear someone express such love, to often we can focus on the negative untrue things you are turning this around and at the same time giving everyone a blessing! Thank you!
It was really at one point in life past relationships to see the negative especially when my undealt with hurts were triggered. However now that I have worked with clearing hurts and also deepening my love and self appreciation it is very easy to see all I love and appreciate in others, especially my husband. And of course because he is totally lovely – it’s easy.
Johanna the way you and your husband continually deepen your relationship is super inspiring. You lead the way and he joyfully follows, and this feels so natural. Too often I hear (and I have been there myself) women complaining about their partner. This blog shows how we can inspire each other to ever deepen our relationships.
This is such a beautiful blog of appreciation, all that we are is reflected in what you present. The love we can build and the grand effect it has on every relationship we enter.
Yes Benkt and what I m realising every day more and more is that it is just a choice we can choose to appreciate someone and all they bring or we can choose to nit pick what is wrong with them or what does not match up to our expectations. Ultimately we are choosing love or not.
We can have beautiful relationships with everyone we have a relationship with. When we appreciate that, and build our loving relationship with ourselves, every relationship has the opportunity to grow and grow.
What really stands out for me is the absolute appreciation that comes with this blog.
I don’t feel this is done enough in relationships, but to do so, to truly appreciate another for all they are, without need or expectation, is to absolutely hold them in love.
Wow what a gift we have in any relationship.
To appreciate is to allow someone to naturally go deeper – because they are confirmed in where they are, so how could they not be more.
I agree Hannah. Not only in couple relationships, but even in friendships, there is a great deal more appreciation that is needed.
Yes. This is important to do everywhere and with everyone. People desperately need to be confirmed for who they are in truth.
“To appreciate is to allow someone to naturally go deeper ” awesome observation Hannah, so very true it really is the greatest gift to just allow someone to be who they are, it will always go messy if we impose or put our expectations onto someone.
“For the first time in this life I feel that I am in an intimate, fully committed relationship with a man where we treat each other as equals: we are each unique, we each have our own offerings and strengths in our relationship as we do have areas we each need support with.”
That is so beautiful. It seems simple but to get there is hard work and requires commitment, as I have discovered. Especially the equal part, was, and still is, every now and then, difficult, as I had put my partner on a pedestal for all the beautiful qualities she brings, under valuing and not really appreciating the loving, playful, caring, tender, powerful to name just a few qualities:-) – that I am.
Thank you Willem. Yes it is very simple but this just goes to show how much we firstly complicate life, the relationship with ourselves and the dynamics we bring to the relationships with others in general. I have had a few relationships and not felt what I do today. This is simply because of the healing, self care, layers I have let go of and relationship I developed with myself before I entered this one. . . And of course both my husband and I have a willingness to make our relationship one of truth not comfort or arrangement. We truly want to develop and deepen our true support.
I am a man, absolutely with only interest for women 🙂 – but judging from the photo, you DO have a gorgeous husband !
It is great to read to somebody express in this way about their partner. How many people in a relation could do that? Not only the words, but honestly? I am afraid, not very many.
Great point Willem – anyone can write beautiful words but it is rare to feel that these words are lived and expressed from a deep knowing of who we are. Johanna has beautifully demonstrated how it is done here.
Yes this is a sad fact Willem. We renter relationships seeing and feeling all we love about a person but people tend to not work on developing their relationship with self or with their partner and it soon becomes about what their partner can and can not do for them rather than the full appreciation of the gorgeousness they feel in love with with their partner.
You are so lucky Johanna to have such a beautiful, loving relationship with your husband.
Although we all know that this has nothing to do with luck, it is due to your commitment to love, truth and openness – and your loving relationship with yourself first. Thank you for sharing your inspirational story with all of us.
This is a beautiful sharing, Johanna and I really feel it is a celebration of love. It’s incredible that for most of our lives we wonder through, not truly knowing what love is and for some of us realising that the love we do know isn’t true! I feel it is a shame that most of us do not realise that the love we seek from others is actually inside us. It is there and has been there all the time! Thanks to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I too am learning to reconnect to that love and bring it out in all that I say and do. It’s still quite early days for me, but when it happens it feels amazing. Just to have a joke with a stranger at the train station fills my body with such a warm glow, I cannot help but appreciate it.
I am sure if there was this kind of communication and appreciation taught to couples before they intend to get married there would be much less divorces. There probably would be less marriages too, because it would expose the couples that don’t do this and are not willing to learn.
You have a great point there Jinya. How many couples get married to hide in a relationship, or to fill their loneliness (even though they may not realise this at the time), and having to look at their communication and appreciation issues may be a little too exposing for some.
So true Sandra and Jinya, I know sometimes I feel challenged in my relationships when asked to go deeper. When we feel challenged we then have a choice we can react and go into resistance or comfort not choosing to evolve or we can feel a wee bit uncomfortable and go deeper into our own love and our love with others.
That is so true Jinya. Less divorces, and less marriages too, if this kind of communication would be required before you could get married. I am wondering how married couples who remain if this would be the new standard? Not too many. But if Johanna and her partner could be the new standard, and people who be properly educated in what is like to have a true relation, based on true love, these ‘new type relationships’ could very well be very contagious.
‘For me, this is the confirmation of how powerful the expression of love is: it is supportive, beholding and asking us to further question, unfold and return to the greatness we are all actually from.’ This is so beautiful and a great reminder of how that reflection and expression of love changes lives, and how it’s our responsibility to everyone to hold that love for them to also have the inspiration to return to when they are ready.
I love the simplicity of this blog – the deep and pure appreciation, and a love that is not smothering but simply holding. With no need or expectations from each other.
That just feels so true and ultimately what we all know to be love.
To truly appreciate those we love is something we don’t do often enough, yet it is so confirming. If we can appreciate where someone is at, they can only go deeper, love more, open up more.
Appreciation is so confirming and as I bring it into my relationships, I really see the amazing difference and depth of love that is almost never ending.
Beautiful sharing about the truth of a person living who they truly are, bringing honesty, willingness and openness to all others. Although in you share a very special union what you have described here Johanna is about true service, equality and consistency. Thank you for celebrating your love with us all.
“For the first time in this life I feel that I am in an intimate, fully committed relationship with a man where we treat each other as equals: we are each unique, we each have our own offerings and strengths in our relationship as we do have areas we each need support with.” Thank you for sharing this with the world by writing this blog. I agree it is truly beautiful and possible to be in a fully committed relationship based on love and that feels completely equal.
This was beautiful to read Johanna. A hint to appreciate those in our life and what they bring. Also what we all bring – a chance to deepen love.
What a beautiful appreciation of your husband Johanna and a joy to read . To get to this loving place is worth celebrating and the expansion from here can only flow and grow with you together. The gift Serge Benhayon is offering us by his inspiration for true relationships is simply gorgeous and so loving and tender brings understanding to relationships and showing us how they can truly be if we choose to make loving choices and work on our stuff. A great sharing thank you
Lately I have been seeing how we compete with each other, in almost everything. This produces and feeling of a struggle and a fight, am I better than you, or are you my superior? Who is in the driving seat? I can see now how this approach has been carried into every relationship I have had. So what you share here Johanna is actually massive. We can as men, as women, truly connect to each other, appreciate our essence and make competition a dying sport.
Letting go of competition Joseph is huge as you say, it can run us without realising it’s there. When we connect to each other and appreciate who we truly are, that we are all different but all on our own journeys, we are all the same and there’s absolutely no need to compete. We can all drop the competition with this understanding.
I love that Joseph “make competition a dying sport” it works on so many levels.
Great honest sharing Joseph. Love it.
What I have just come to realize is that when you don’t appreciate and see the divine constellation of you being together, then issues will ALWAYS arise. Then it is up to you (not only meaning you Joseph, but us in general), to ask: do I have a devine constellated relationship, or am I just here to fulfill my needs? Am I wasting time with this person and is there somebody else waiting?
Reading your words Johanna, I can feel how you hold your husband as truly precious, independent of his choices, or actions that day. When we see past the roles we play to appreciate our essence its like we are given permission to open up in a big way. What a difference to the continual striving to be the ‘perfect partner’, so many of us think we have to live up to.
A blog full of appreciation. How gorgeous, and how important. We often do not stop to appreciate the people in our lives. To dedicate a blog to someone feels so honouring and full of love.
Beautifully expressed Johanna, couples like you guys are too few and far between you are an inspiration to us all as we all have to be careful in relationships that we are not holding each other back or only giving or receiving a measured amount of love. Appreciation for self and each other is the key for growth.
To be able to express how we feel about another is HUGE and is very healing for both parties; something we don’t do enough. It’s great that you are supporting, loving and encouraging your husband, rather than bringing him down.
Reading your blog Johanna has allowed me to pause and appreciate my relationship with my partner, all that he brings to our relationship and the beautiful and constant reflection I get from being in a loving relationship.
“For me, this is the confirmation of how powerful the expression of love is: it is supportive, beholding and asking us to further question, unfold and return to the greatness we are all actually from.” Beautiful said Johanna.
Johanna, I have found that having a commitment to always being more love in our relationship is a beautiful way to heal any disharmony and to continually move froward in our commitment to each other and what we are bringing to others.
I love this Anne ‘A commitment to always being more love.’ With this kind of understanding how can we do anything but expand and evolve?
There was a men’s group led by Michael Benhayon and Otto Bathurst recently that was open to women. Feeling and listening to the men speaking it was clear that there is no difference between us at all. It was so refreshing to feel this equalness. It is us that put things in the way to our clear communication and expressing ourselves in full. I felt such appreciation of both men and women in this short meeting. Appreciation for us to express the joy in living in the bodies that we have chosen, enjoying everything there is in being a man and equally everything there is in being a woman.
Re-reading your blog Johanna, reminds me to appreciate and allow time and space for my relationships to grow. To let go of expectations and lovingly reassess what I would like to bring into my relationships.
Beautifully expressed Chan.
I love how developing appreciation for ourselves helps us to appreciate others. To appreciate the natural tenderness that is in all men is beautiful and reminds me to be tender too.
I agree Carmel, we are all naturally tender and beautiful. By appreciating ourselves we can expand our appreciation to others too.
This is gorgeous Johanna, instead of focussing on what isn’t perfect in our relationship, it is so different to appreciate and express to each other ALL we bring to the relationship. Expressing our love will make the relationship endlessly grow and grow and grow and grow endlessly.
Johanna, you have made love the foundation of your life. This means everything must be about love first; appreciating this love reinforces an already solid foundation.
It is so important what you share here Johanna, as there is no other option than to love – equally in every relationship – if you are up for true good. Since I know Serge Benhayon, and Universal Medicine has been in my life, I know that I deep down missed love enormously, even though I looked at the wrong places (except within). I am now realizing that I have more ways built (created) to offset myself, my love than anything else, shame. But.. Nevertheless what I am now learning by Universal Medicine is that I am now offered the opportunity, just like everybody else, to discard these old abusive ways (creation) and come back to the love I am. I have to say it might be bumpy at times, but the absolute solid feeling of letting hurtful (hurts) and abuse (self-abusive ways) go and out of my body – is the best gift I have ever given myself. Thank you Universal Medicine. Thank you Johanna.
Wow Danna, you have covered everything, from how to get from A to B to back to Love… You are absolutely right there is NO other option but Love, what else is there, we come from love and we will return to love. We may wobble along the way but through the teachings of Universal Medicine and the loving support of Serge Benhayon we have no more excuses but to take full responsibility, stop creating a loveless world and come back to the Love that we are. I have missed love too but now we know where true love resides we can stop the ceaseless search for it on the outside and empower ourselves by connecting to it on the inside.
The tenderness presented here is deeply felt inspiring us that we have a choice to have this too in all our relationships and all we have to do is ask ourselves why, knowing we have created it to avoid the responsibility of having truly loving, intimate and deeply caring relationships. What an inspiring blog – thank you Johanna.
I agree Caroline. I just love the level of tenderness that Johanna writes about her husband. It reminds me to hold everyone in my life with that level of tenderness as well.
Great points Caroline and Elizabeth, I can feel why I have held back from expressing my love to others is because of my own hurts or wanting the other to appreciate me first to feel safe to express my love – something I am learning to let go of in my life. The biggest key for me has been to deepen the appreciation and love for myself which has allowed me to feel this and celebrate it in others without needing anything in return.
It amazes me what we create in our relationships to avoid the responsibility of having true intimacy with another whether that is with a partner or friend and the lengths we will go to, to avoid this.
Yes Caroline, how crazy is it when true intimacy is what we long for most in our relationships. How wonderful to read Joanna’s sharing here along with the gorgeous comments, proving that when we do open up in relationships whatever their nature, be it partner or friend, there is the opportunity for so much more.
Your writing is truly i spiring me to appreciate my partner more and how we are together in the relationship. I melted when I read your blog. What an effect it will have on relationships, if we were just to express our love and appreciation to all our intimate relationships.
“How powerful the expression of love is”. To share this with another is so beautiful and what is reflected back is pure joy.
The words capture something really big. It is amazingly beautiful when someone refers to his/her partner in a way that holds him/her in fond love and deeply honour him/her. Thank you for sharing this ove with the world.
Johanna this is a hardness melter for sure, great to re-read and feel the deep honouring of yourself and your husband equally. I love the fact you mention how your husband does not always appreciate himself but is aware of that. I know that for myself too and would add that perhaps if anything needs to take time, it is our deepening acceptance of how awesome we are.
Oh yes, please do take the time Simon, to deepen your acceptance, you are absolutely worth it and we would dearly welcome your great love. It is felt here.
Thank you Joanna for sharing your appreciation for your loving husband. I have realised that I have never been in a truly intimate relationship with a man, so I greatly appreciate other people’s stories of what this is like.
Your blog is a beautiful reminder for me to appreciate more deeply the relationships in my life and to express this to others – I am sure there would be less marriage break-ups if we simply expressed our love and appreciation daily.
True Anna, also less depression and mental illness. Lack of expression and appreciation is responsible for the beginning of all our illness and disease, this is the key missing fact that the medical profession is currently lacking.
I find this a gorgeous testament to love when it is expressed through truth, equality, gentleness and tenderness not just within the relationship but also to oneself and shared with everyone
So true Jonathon, learning to love ourselves is an important and vital step in the foundation of a relationship with self or anyone else. This is so foreign to most men and women so a few ideals require knocking down before it begins or it is simply that we have never been told about this.
Men can find it hard to accept and express appreciation, so I am sure that by sharing your appreciation of him, he also learns to appreciate himself and others also.