Relationships are precious. There is the potential in each relationship to reflect back to us an aspect of the puzzle we are all here on earth to piece together.
Life itself has taught me this. Every relationship I have had, and continue to have, has helped me go deeper into the most important of all relationships â the relationship with myself. And then in turn, this has had a very positive effect on all my other relationships as well.
What I have learnt is that when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what, it actually needs no passport! It needs no physical presence for the relationship to deepen and for the love to grow. We can be across the world, sometimes not even speak to each other for some time, and this will not matter if the love continues to be there. Love remains at work, holding the other, as we hold ourselves and in that holding, immense healing takes place.
Some 16 years ago I chose to move from the UK to Australia. The call to move was undeniable and the moment I set foot on Australian soil I knew I was home. It was that simple. I arrived here with my then partner â with all my family remaining on the other side of the world.
I kept regular contact with my family, as one would expect, and would take regular trips back to the UK to visit. A few years after I had made the move, one of my brothers became mentally ill and a likely danger to himself and others. What followed were some very distressing times for my brother and my mother in particular, who was at the forefront of the situation. There were regular phone calls and Skype conversations to try and support with what was happening â and when I say support, back then it was all about fixing this problem to make it go away.
Yes, I wanted to support my mother and absolutely I wanted to help my brother. But I also wanted the problem to go away because it was so awful to have hanging around. Underlying all my efforts and intentions, there was this unreconciled guilt that I wasnât physically there to support them from close.
This guilt was foreboding â what was I to do? Was I to pack up and return to the UK and be physically there? Was that what was needed? Would it make all the difference?
I took this inner turmoil I was feeling to a healing session with a very wise esoteric practitioner, who lived a quality of relationships with others that I very much admired. I remember the session as clearly now as I did back then, and it is these words in particular that keep coming back:
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â
At the time I couldnât really get this.
I got a sense of what the words were saying, but I couldnât quite accept that what was being said was in fact a truth. How could this be relevant when my family was on the other side of the world, literally? But I decided to be open to what had been said at least, and to deepen my own commitment to healing all those unreconciled hidden pockets of pain within myself. I was curious to see what ripple effect this could potentially have on my relationship with my brother, and on my brotherâs situation.
What unfolded over the years that followed was nothing less than a miracle. I watched from the other side of the world as my brother, who had become a recluse with a bleak future and nowhere to turn, took absolute hold of his life and turned it around. I watched him walk away from drugs and alcohol and from the party crowds he used to hang out with â even though this meant that he would feel even more lonely for a period of time.
I also watched him turn around from being staunchly against medical intervention to cooperating with the doctors fully, knowing that was an essential part of the responsibility he needed to take. I watched him make those steps to going back into the world again, to working, to being amongst people and developing a confidence within himself that he could now bring into social situations. This was a confidence he did not have before. And I watched the joy he would have as a little boy return to his face. His eyes once again saying, âI see you and I am here.â
I visited my brother just 3 or 4 times over this period â and this is in the course of approximately 5 years. Our relationship deepened with the physical distance being there, and it wasnât about being on Skype or the phone every day. Sometimes we would not talk for days, even weeks. But what was always there was my resolute commitment to holding my brother and the situation in love, and addressing anything that would get in the way of this. This meant looking at any expectations or frustrations I might have had, any belief systems that I had taken on to consider the situation being under the banner of right and wrong.
Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are â and this was my vantage point. If I was not seeing in my brother the grandness that he is, lurking underneath the turmoil he was in, I would look back at myself first. What was in me that was covering up the truth that love will always let you see?
It wasnât smooth sailing by any means â there were challenges and difficult times, particularly for my brother â but underlyingly it was clear that he was now feeling held by something bigger, something far stronger, than the seeming darkness of his immediate situation.
I did not want to accept those words that the esoteric practitioner had expressed to me back then, because in accepting them I would have needed to accept my power as well. The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in.
And herein is the responsibility that we often duck from in relationships.
If we make relationships about âyou do your bit, I do my bit and then our needs will meet in the middleâ, we donât need to consider the powerful ripple effect that is happening anyway between us. But when I say powerful â is it from a loving, healing quality if we are choosing to behave and relate in a way that is contra to this?
Whether we like it or not, we are always oozing something out of ourselves and whatever it is we are oozing is being latched on to by the other! So do we ooze love, joy and a commitment to letting go of our hurts, knowing there is a vastness of more love to connect to underneath them, or do we ooze the icky hurts themselves? Do we stand up the walls of protection where we allow some people to access some parts of us, but always with conditions and always with a get-out clause, which means we never let ourselves get too close?
A true relationship has no walls and no protection. We deepen constantly; we bear who we truly are constantly. We jump off the cliff knowing we will be held in Godâs love, which is our love. And so we go for it in full.
I can even go as far to say that a true relationship is the communication of Heaven in physical form. What we exchange amongst each other is far from merely physical, emotional and spiritual â it is in fact, the exchange of the entire universe with the vastness of the stars coming through one divine spark to the other. Because it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to.
By Anonymous, Australia
Further Reading:
My Brother – Not an In-LAW
Making a relationship about true love
Constellations
What you are sharing with everyone is very beautiful and what can be if we commit to loving ourselves first. The knock on effect of this is that this love is felt by all others and can awaken in them the same feelings because we are after all, all the same we all come from a body of love and we will all return to the same body of love. Our future is written in the stars.
A responsibility to meet ourselves with all the Love that we are flows through our relationships with everyone else.
A great reminder this morning that what we see in others first tells us a lot about our relationship with ourselves. We can choose to see the issues or the grandness.
Appreciating the power of our essences is what is shared here as appreciation brings us so much as it holds us to the next magic moment of how divinity works and then we appreciate that until the next point of our evolution and a deeper relationship with our essences, which is the Love of God that is shared.
[…] a time in my past when I put myself on a program to bring deeper awareness to how I was in all my relationships, whether that was with my family, the shop assistant at the plaza, my hairdresser, the woman I sat […]
A magic blog. Thank you.
“If I was not seeing in my brother the grandness that he is, lurking underneath the turmoil he was in, I would look back at myself first. What was in me that was covering up the truth that love will always let you see?” What an inspiring story, thank you for all the wisdom shared from your experiences, and the simplicity of making our own lives about love and healing first and holding others in that equality and love. It’s a big difference between imposing and trying to “fix” things (understandable) and dedicating our lives to being love with ourselves and others.
I absolutely love this blog, to me it makes so much sense, when we think some one ‘needs’ us we tend to be all over them, when in fact the space betweens us can communicate all the love in the universe.
We learn so much from one another, and what is reflected, ‘Every relationship I have had, and continue to have, has helped me go deeper into the most important of all relationships â the relationship with myself. And then in turn, this has had a very positive effect on all my other relationships as well.’
I love what you have shared here Shirley-Ann in that the space between people is equally important as how we are within and if we tune into this or are allow ourselves to be sensitive to this how it can support all of our relationships.
Indeed love holds and can behold another, not in an emotional way but in energetic truth.
Being open and willing to learn from the reflections in all our relationships is a fantastic recipe to develop love within ourselves; they bring everything we need to grow and evolve and the end product is a forever increasing love held in the body.
Itâs convenient how our normal idea of what Love looks like, is like a yummy dish we can enjoy with some but not others. It completely overlooks the fact that the level of love we live is a constant emanation – a quality of energy that will never pick and choose.
It is a very very gorgeous and freeing feeling to feel the impact we can have on another just by being our true self. It is equally an awkward moment because you realise that it is no longer all about you and what you want but more about what we all truly need.
The beautiful thing about love is that it simply is, no more and no less.
This morning I was lovingly given the link to this blog, one which I’ve read many times but now has a poignancy that offers such love. There may be big choices to be made in a potentially challenging time – which is a beautiful opportunity for great expressions of love. The choice of love is never less or more in any situation. When unloving choices come to a head it may seem this way. It’s important I don’t rush but stay in the spaciousness that is love.
I live away physically from my blood family, and this blog has moved me deeply as it clearly states a huge truth that we are all connected all of the time. To see the healing in our families is beautiful and to feel that love is always there no matter how far we are in space is a great confirmation.
There are no borders to LOVE.
Love simply is, ‘Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are’.
I agree, it is undeniable concerning the way that our own healing ripples out and supports others in their own path of healing. It is selfless to heal, because through healing we are more responsible and become more aware of others and our impact on them. Healing ourselves from within to support life as a whole.
Yes, it’s totally selfless to heal. I know that when I have I then reflect to others the possibility of being free of these things. I reflect understanding and love and I have felt people feel the possibility of breaking free from whatever it is that binds them.
“âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â Wow this is gorgeous it takes away all the unnecessary stress and heartache that we can have when fixated with wanting to ‘help’ another.
If I do not see and hold another in the grandness and beauty they are, then it is I that needs healing and not them. This is a wonderful marker I hold in my body. It stops and takes me inward offering and asking me to take responsibility and heal what is going on within me.
Opening myself up and letting people in is magic in any relationship. Feeling raw and exposed I allow myself to be seen for the woman who I truly am and not the woman pretending to be something she is not or fulfilling a role at the mercy of those around her.
‘There is the potential in each relationship to reflect back to us an aspect of the puzzle we are all here on earth to piece together.’ This is a wonderful way to be with each person we meet, that there is a grandness to them that we can never dismiss. It brings us all as equal as we all have a part of divinity to bring to one another.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â This is pure revelation. We do not yet appreciate the simple alchemy we offer others by the way we live, if the way we live is deeply honouring of who we truly are and where we come from. We live in an ocean of energy and our every move sends out ripples that affect all others no matter their geographic location. There are no borders in the world of energy. This is such a beautiful example of everyday alchemy in action and your closing words bring tears of joy to my eyes, so true they are.
This just proves that everything is indeed energy, and everything we do right now effects everyone else, when we acknowledge this truth we confirm God.
All the artificial boundaries that we have eventually need to come down but in the meantime we just need to be loving towards each other.
I just love this blog it is gold from beginning to end. Thank you Anonymous..
‘What I have learnt is that when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what, it actually needs no passport!’ I know that the more I live love in my life without putting on any conditions, those who are in my life but I do not see do feel the changes and can learn to trust in themselves more again too.
Our energetic connection holds all the power of our relationships, not our physical proximity to each other.
This is an amazing perspective on relationships – ‘the exchange of the entire universe’. What is on offer when we open up to true relationship is stupendous.
What a stupendous revelation, we do not have to compromise ourselves to help others, it is the love for ourselves that reaches all.
Committing to a life of healing is committing the truth that we are, as all the hurts we carry from moving away from the love we originally are from is the root cause of all our personal issues, but too of all the issues and atrocities we have in the world for ages and ages, possibly as long as we live as human beings here on this planet earth.
A mastering aspect in relationships is in the letting go of the personal hurts that make us to build this wall of protection. Walls that not only shuts us off from the world and all people we are with but too 1) from expressing freely and unconditionally all the love that we are and 2) restrict other people we are with to express their love freely and unconditionally too.
“A true relationship has no walls and no protection. We deepen constantly; we bear who we truly are constantly.” I love this Anonymous it is so true – the more we open up and allow another in the more we grow and evolve. There is no stopping us when we get our hurts and head out of the way.
What a great question to ask of any relationship we have to anyone or aspect of life: what’s there that’s obscuring the truth that love will always let you see.
Asking the what questions is often needed as we can so comfortably sit in the what is okay for now. There is always room for more love and with this comes more understanding.
Yes we are lost in our assumptions and it is critical that we ask why and what about our life and not assume it always has to stay a certain way. Living with more love and responsibility offers clarity like nothing else I have experienced, this supports the quality of the answers and the questioning.
We are all born with a passport that gives us equal multidimensional access to the universe and beyond and God, and that passport is our Soul. And though our connection to our Soul we see and know that love is the quality we all equally are and are from. It is this quality that when lived and shared in our relationships heals all that is not of love, allowing the quality of love to be magnified.
And this passport is not to separate us into nations, cultures and religious belief systems, but instead gives us free access to the universal love we are all from and connected with.
When we stop worrying and trying to ‘fix’ people those ‘people’ realise they are perfectly capable of fixing themselves. It is our arrogance and need that tells us we need to fix them or we have all their answers.
Yes, and it also ignores the fact that they are making choices they are wanting on some level and capable to make other choices. So many solutions can be offered that would work but wouldn’t give them the payback they’re desiring. I know this is very true of me.
I remember my early understanding of love in a relationship, that two halves would perfectly fit together to create the perfect whole. This was a total misunderstanding on my part… why not two wholes that come together and support each other to grow and deepen… and that the purpose of that is to reflect more, offer more to the world?
Yes, even though we are a part of a whole we are whole in our part. So it is not about to find completion in a relationship but to expand and grow continuously.
The latter model no doubt brings in the richness that goes beyond the perfection that we so often seek but leads us to understand that no perfection but bucket loads of understanding and love is the way to go!
It is gorgeous how when we choose to be open, bring our all without holding back the love that we are without pictures and expectations, there is always so much for us to learn and deepen with. Plus we are often pleasantly surprised with far more than we had even imagined.
Thanks for the wonderful reminder
What beautiful words âAs you heal those in close relationship with you also heal.â as we hold ourselves in love, that love holds those close to us also in love and with this love, healing is offered.
Such is the divine and beholding quality that love is… to all to be at one with the essence of it’s maker.
âAs you heal those in close relationship with you also heal.â These wise words are beautiful and also true in my experience also.
I talked with a friend recently who’s father is dying – she lives in another county to him, when she was telling me I remembered your blog and we talked about how he would be receiving her love no matter where in the world he was.
Not letting others in is a bigger barrier than any physical distance could ever be.
This is a beautiful blog for me to read as I have lived on the other side of the world from my family for nearly 25 years and I have often felt the guilt of not being there in times of need.
A passport to love! Or no passport needed to Love! I love the way you reflect here on a passport being similar to the barriers, expectations, ideals and beliefs we project onto relationships and when we take these away and make it truly about love, with anyone, magic happens.
‘There is the potential in each relationship to reflect back to us an aspect of the puzzle we are all here on earth to piece together.’ I used to be very insecure and wanted to rely on a core few for my needs and not venture out to having relationships with other people so much. Now I’m far more allowing of the awareness of where I need to be and who I am there to connect with. I smile inside when I bump into someone knowing the reflection of what is needed is being given to us through the other so that we may grow in some way. It’s fun no longer being possessive and controlling of people and relationships.
This understanding that what we reflect is of no lesser importance regardless of whether its a partner or child, or a long distant relative, acquaintance or work colleague. Everyone is watching all the time, studying the reflection of others and underneath it all… looking for and recognising Truth when it pops its head up.
As we go through customs what we truly ought to declare is our oneness with everyone else. If we got security scanned for illusion and documents stamped to certify our divinity – we wouldnât have jet lag but landing with purpose.
They say the more countries you visit the more of a person you are… Well I say the more people you love the more of yourself you are đ
We have immense ripple effects through relationships.
Very true Michael. The quality of our movements with everyone and every thing reflect out to the wider world.
If you live away from someone, the moments that you DO spend time with each other in person are important as they set the foundation of communication and relationship for the next period apart. It’s a beautiful opportunity to connect and explore what the next phase of the relationship might have in store, and having these kind of conversations is ‘catching up’ but with purpose đ
Our families and friendships have tied us up in the idea that Love is an act, a task, a party or a gift. But when we connect to the fact that itâs a quality we emmanate, weâll see it cannot be bound to one group or nationality – itâs as absurd as trying to tie up a cloud or lasso the air.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â I have found this true for myself although sometimes their behaviours may be off the wall and then it is for me to stay steady and not let myself react to this or absorb any of the energy they are giving off is key.
To bring responsibility in to the discussion about ones own healing journey is very inspiring and interesting. I like it especially because it makes no one person isolated, it can never be just about ‘me’ and ‘my healing’ as it will always be about us and our healing, collectively and with grace and understanding.
What could be more inspiring than one human beings dedication to loving others? It’s been very powerful reading this again and understanding how we can reflect on what it is within that prevents us from holding every human being in our love. So beautiful, thank you.
On quite a simple and practical note, so many people say that they need to travel to different countries in order to experience different cultures and meet people who have grown up there, and although I absolutely love travelling and think you learn SO much from it, when it isn’t possible to travel across the world you can simply go out and make more connections in the community. With more and more people moving abroad and living, working and building families in other countries, there is a wealth of diversity, wisdom and experience in your back yard that is magic to explore.
‘We jump off the cliff knowing we will be held in Godâs love, which is our love.’ It’s so much easier to stay on the cliff where it’s safe, plunging into the unknown seems very scary but is it the unknown if we are always held in God’s love and we know that?
Getting on with it is the true fearless. Knowing when we surrender back to love, Life unfolds.
When we realise everything is energy nothing we do is going unnoticed and all we do can be supportive or indeed not supportive of others in the world.
We are not as segregated as we like to think. The whole concept of nation states and borders are great big lies to amplify the idea that we are seperate, different and disconnected here. Nothing could be further from the truth. For when we live, everyone feels and receives our choices. The quality we live impacts every human being. Why stay living in these seperate cells when life is constantly telling us – itâs about the whole – everything?
‘ Love remains at work, holding the other, as we hold ourselves and in that holding, immense healing takes place.’ I love this especially that love remains at work. It shows the multidimensionality that is at hand and that there is a wisdom and intelligence far greater than I could ever comprehend – a tender humility to be lived.
I have definitely found that love can deepen without a physical contact in any relationship. In fact, without the physical presence of a person which can sometimes turn into filling your own needs and comfort, a distance friendship can be based on the qualities of each person and the depth of connection you feel.
Coming back to this article, this quote really stood out for me; ‘it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to’. Do we honour this potential and treat our relationships as an opportunity to connect to this, or make them menial, surface level and run by issues and dynamics?
What you’ve shared here is that how we are, the quality we are in and choose, does make a difference to others. When we sort out our own stuff and heal our own hurts, we show that it’s not that scary and it is totally possible to lead the lives we know we have the potential to lead.
I realise every time I take the responsibility to not hold back myself with others in what I am feelingâthe vulnerability, the possible hurts, the loveliness without feeling less, the people close to me start to express more of themselves and their claiming of responsibility in life, it is really amazing.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â This confirms that self love is the foundation of all other relationships.
This gives us a whole new perspective on connection, relationships, people, purpose and shows that the way we live life really does affect others in ways we often dont’ truly consider.
I love the way you present relationships as being universal and from the stars. If we open out our awareness to this bigger picture we can accept the grandness that we are and the way that we can communicate and relate in a divine way. No more playing small!
This is truly beautiful and very healing to read, often we have our own needs or pictures we want fulfilled from our relationships and then we end up having arrangements with others and wonder why we are not experiencing any deep connection or love with another. The way you held your brother with love without any attachment is very inspiring and shows us the power of love to transform not only our own life but also the lives of others around us, this is true responsibility and true love.
‘âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â I am getting an understanding that as I open myself up to love coming through me then those who are connected with me in some way also get this because love has no divide. Then it makes sense they feel this and make their own choices to allow greater love in their lives or not.
When things get hard and rough the best thing we can do is step up and embrace it in full rather than crouching down and waiting for it all to ‘blow over’.
I donât like the idea of another holding me in an energy that is not loving yet they claim to love me. But focusing on trying to run away from that energetic hold is nigh impossible. My understanding brings it back to – If I change how I hold myself that in turn can inspire others to hold themselves and thus me and everyone else in more love. Focusing on others doesnât work it comes back to how I am with myself.
I so so love this blog, it has everything in it that we need to know when missing someone due to distance.
Last week I sat on a plane with a lady who had travelled 20 hours on a plane to see her dad who was ill in hospital, I talked about this blog and how we are so connected no matter what the distance – she like me found this hugely comforting.
A commitment to bringing love to a relationship no matter what is totally where it is at. I can feel some relationships are offering me an opportunity to heal old hurts in what the person is reflecting to me; a chance to respond lovingly where neither party is right or wrong, better off or worse off
– love has no investment because it already is everything.
I can also attest to the fact that love doesn’t need a physical presence. Last year I finally got to meet some ladies who I had been meeting online and working on projects with for some time. My mind couldn’t quite register that I hadn’t met them since there was so much love and intimacy between us. Meeting in person was really just a confirmation and the icing on the cake.
You’ve beautifully shared that sometimes our responsibility in a situation is to be open to support, surrendering and allowing things to be as they are. We often run to the hills when responsibility is brought to our attention, however it is so much more than having ‘roles’ or ‘chores’ to do.
Staying put and allowing the lessons to flow with the responsibilities is the biggest learning in any situation. Yes, we may feel to squirm but what we learn is invaluable!
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â – This has been evident in my life. There is a member of my family who has gone through an extraordinary transformation over the past couple of years and is now steaming ahead with the life that he wants rather than being in the depths of despair, depression and drug addiction. It has been amazing to watch.
Love is boundless.
The internet can be so supportive when we use it to connect to people and develop our relationships.
This is a very enlightening blog for me because as you say, anonymous, accepting the power that we hold within our bodies is the quality we hold ourselves in. And for me, to accept the power we have is to admit that we are very powerful and not the victims that we so often want to portray to the world. And there lies our irresponsibility to ourselves and others.
Yes relationships are very powerful and our relationships with others are very much related to our relationship with ourselves. Therefore when we have a commitment to love and responsibility with ourselves we bring that to all and everyone regardless of how they respond. Equally if we are abusive towards ourselves that is what others receive regardless of our words.
I love the line: As you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal. It brings a simplicity to the relationship. As you wrote ‘if I do my bit…’ It does require a level of responsibility, that’s all, and a deepening love for ourselves. And indeed there are no borders, passports needed for being with the other, to hold the other. What this line shows me, that neither is there a limit, border or line of the depth of healing. So where I deepen, the relationship with the other does as well. It almost feels like an end of the so-called border between ‘You & me”.
No holding back Love! It can’t be stopped.. only delayed.
I totally agree Michelle, if we get relationships to be about Love then everything will make sense.
I love the opening lines and appreciating each one of us is a piece of the puzzle we all need to appreciate the bigger picture. It really puts my old belief -that we just have the one soul mate and that will complete us – to bed. How wonderful to give myself the joy of seeing the beauty in everyone.
This is very powerful. You remind me that I do know my responsibility in relationships. Incredible healing that can take place when we choose this.
“The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in” – This is very beautiful and brings attention back to the fact that it is our QUALITY that makes who we are and supports others in our relationships, not what we do.
“A true relationship is the communication of Heaven in physical form. What we exchange amongst each other is far from merely physical, emotional and spiritual â it is in fact, the exchange of the entire universe ” Beautifully said and the real gift in our lives making love , healing and evolution what life is all about.
There is a cycle to life which I have observed, and this is relating to the fact that as we go deeper in our love for ourselves – paying astute attention to the quality of the movements and thoughts that we have, then our relationships with each other seem to become more respectful, intimate, playful and ultimately have the potential to be truly loving.
“If I was not seeing in my brother the grandness that he is, lurking underneath the turmoil he was in, I would look back at myself first” – the humility of this is love. Seeing someone not for the issue they’re in, but the essence of their truth… is not easy to see when one is in turmoil oneself, though in the presence of self-love, love is easier to spot. The more or deeper we self-love the more we’re able to behold in observation another in that quality [love] too.
When we drop the walls, protection and measurement, love can pour in.
‘Love remains at work, holding the other, as we hold ourselves and in that holding, immense healing takes place.’ This is so my experience. How open I am with people doesn’t stop when I am not physically in their company, it’s how I am with myself and how open I am to letting people in. I can feel what a difference it makes. It’s wonderful to feel this and no longer look for ‘proof’ that this is so – though people do say how warm they feel.
“A true relationship has no walls and no protection. We deepen constantly; we bear who we truly are constantly.” I love this it is so true, the more we drop our protection and the more we open up the more joy and love we say YES too.
When we make relationships about love we eliminate the need to be right or wrong.
” âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â ”
This is so wonderful and what a support knowing the more one re-connects with themselves the greater the opportunity others have to do the same
I recognise this. Often in the past when I have had some difficulties with a relationship with a friend or colleague, when I have eventually turned it around in myself and claimed a little bit more of myself and let go of a belief system or past hurt, then without having spoken to them the next time we have met the relationship has become equal and the “air cleared”, and it is more than the air that has cleared.
A beautiful blog simply holding us all in the love we are “Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are”. Inspirational and simple and something to always remember when we get blinded by our stuff that gets in he way of deepening all that is on offer in our relationships.
‘…commitment to holding my brother and the situation in love’ this is beautiful and in living more and more love in our own lives so too does our responsibility to hold others increase all the more.
This is the kind of article I would love to see in the mainstream papers, you offer loads here, I learnt so much. If the world understood what you write here we would all be taking a deeper responsibility for ourselves and in doing so naturally for those close to us – either near or far. Beautiful article.
One of the most liberating facts about life is that as we heal, others around us have the opportunity to do so too. This makes life so simple and our responsibility so clear. We work on, care for, take responsibility for ourselves and the ripple effect is felt and assured.
‘We can be across the world, sometimes not even speak to each other for some time, and this will not matter if the love continues to be there.’ This is true anonymous . and in a similar way , we can feel complete connection with a stranger on the street when we are open and transparent with Love.
‘âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â’ I love reading this as I can feel the truth of it in my life. We are so connected and if one connection is expressing love then it can’t but be felt by everyone. Physical boundaries make no difference!
Yes agreed, energy is not contained within walls, it travels on the wings of love or all that is not. What a responsibility we have to each other as far as our input into the collective quality we are all living with.
Holding another consistently in love …and allowing space can be transformational.
A truly healing story. There is no doubt that our relationship with ourselves affects everyone around us. If there is willingness and we are open to it we can support each other greatly.
Starting with being honest with myself and building this openness into my relationship with me, has changed all my relationships completely. All those little, apparently insignificant lies and deceptions I lived with to cover up past unresolved hurts or how I was feeling, led to so much complication, confusion and disconnect in my relationships.
I can understand this âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â It is important to understand that we can heal what is in the way for us and this offers a reflection to everyone around us. Those who have grown up with us will feel these changes. There is a beauty in appreciating this reflection regardless of the response or reactions or pictures of what the outcomes will be.
Holding on to our hurts stops love from being expressed and lived, and as a result of creating walls of protection, it shuts people out and our relationship suffers immensely. The crazy thing is, when we hold onto our hurts, they simply create more hurts. This is a vicious cycle, I have been in it myself and have also seen many people getting stuck in it too.
Love indeed does not have a right or wrong but holds another in a quality of equality and respect.
‘But what was always there was my resolute commitment to holding my brother and the situation in love, and addressing anything that would get in the way of this.’ – how beautiful for your brother to feel your absolute and unwavering commitment to holding him in your love. Allowing him the space to re-kindle his own commitment of love to himself.
Anonymous you have completely blown out of the water any possibility for us to ever doubt that we can do something when we are living remotely from someone who is needing our support.
‘What I have learnt is that when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what, it actually needs no passport!’ – so true, Anonymous. Building our relationships from a foundation of love is the key to dissolving barriers and boundaries.
I love what is shared here about the commitment in a relationship and how this sets the foundation. It is a different way to look at how we are in relationships and what the purpose is, and know that we have a responsibility to live who we are so this can be reflected to others.
âGosh they are annoying!â âI wish they would stop that and go awayâ – how many thoughts we get that all overlook the simple fact you present Anonymous – that our relationships are constellated in the most perfect way. We donât have to fix them, just hold them in Love. Beautifully said.
Hear, hear Joseph. Relationships are actually very simple aren’t they? We just have to hold everyone in love, no need to fix anything or go into frustration. And, by simply holding ourselves and everyone in love, everything naturally is taken care of. This reminds me to never underestimate the power of love.
What a brilliant blog, offering a taste of the power we all hold within without saying anything, but by living, breathing and moving truth we create great change.
I love this article its wisdom has stayed with me since I first read it. What you offer Anon is a chance for us all to see first hand how energy actually works, we work on healing ourselves and give space for others to do the same and its a win win for all.
So interesting – that each relationship in our lives provides another angle of reflection so we can know ourselves even deeper in how we are in the world and with humanity.
‘ Every relationship I have had, and continue to have, has helped me go deeper into the most important of all relationships â the relationship with myself. ‘ This is how we evolve our relationships first and foremost.
From my understanding not all those in close relationships will heal as you heal. They are offered an opportunity to heal and some align and heal while others resist the pull up you are offering and no healing occurs.
As I build and deepen a loving and true relationship with myself the more I am letting go of an attachment to the people in my life. Where there is an attachment there is no love as the relationship can be based on needs, ideals, beliefs or conditions.
Never hold back an ounce of heaven, an ounce of divine responsibility that we all know equally, for that is the reflection and true love we are desperately asking for.
‘A true relationship has no walls and no protection. We deepen constantly; we bear who we truly are constantly. ‘ So this is with EVERYONE! It doesn’t matter that I’ve been brought up by society to differentiate who I am close with and who I am not, who I should care about and who doesn’t matter. I remember telling someone about having this one off interaction with a woman that would have been viewed like we were old friends and the person calling me weird. Usually I would have retreated inward but I know it’s so lovely when I’m not holding back because people do feel it.
I love what has been shared here. We do think we need to be physically present or at least in contact for a relationship to grow. But we can develop the relationship from our side without needing to be with the other person. Love doesn’t have any boundaries or rules and this blog shows that clearly. What it does is hold us and everyone else, offering a light to lead us back to our essence.
What an incredibly beautiful, powerful and inspiring blog, Anonymous. ‘ ….. it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to.’ – you have certainly reflected this in your relationship with your brother and his incredible turn around. You confirm the amazing power that we all have when we are committed to holding each other in love, unreservedly so. Inviting the other person to re-connect with their own divinity, supporting them to make loving choices that re-affirm the truth of who they are.
Guilt and regret are purely harmful and serve no one.
“Relationships are precious. There is the potential in each relationship to reflect back to us an aspect of the puzzle we are all here on earth to piece together.” I love this sharing and the beauty and love it is offering us all to see and remember for ourselves and to live this love in our daily moments and meetings with everyone coming from ourselves.
“What I have learnt is that when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what, it actually needs no passport!” – or anything else either… just love’s continuation through expansion of the very same to grow deeper, richer, grander, bolder.
Anon – Do you feel that by not pandering to the guilt and moving back to the UK, this meant that your brother had to take his own responsibility for where he was at? If you had moved back, would that perhaps have indulged and enabled his choices? I ask without any knowledge of the situation, but am very interested in this because so often the ‘loving’ thing to do is wrapped up with so much poison of emotions and guilt that everyone just gets further infected by whatever is going on. By offering and allowing space, the invitation is then there for the other to step into the truth of themselves.
Thank you for sharing this story. An amazing and humbling testimonial, that makes our responsibility undeniable.
The quality we connect to, and move and live is way more powerful than any words or gifts we can give. Holding another in the beauty they are – energetically offers them the chance to remember they are Love. Thank you Anonymous.
“Whether we like it or not, we are always oozing something out of ourselves and whatever it is we are oozing is being latched on to by the other!” You really highlight the responsibility we all have here Anonymous to choose to live a life of responsibility in order that other people are not affected by our individual choices.
Yesterday I was presented with an opportunity to hold myself and another in the grandness that we truly are, rather than going into reaction and getting hooked into the drama loaded with expectations or fear of outcomes.
The relationship with myself is being called to surrender to a deeper level, even though it is being challenged by others around me.
I can relate to this Stephanie. Iâm realizing at a whole other level how imposing we can be with our errant thoughts, anything that âleaksâ off us undesirably! Which brings home the responsibility to bring deep settlement within us, to have a solidness within that does not leave us as we move about our day. When that is there we emanate grace, and the spaciousness that lets the other be.
Something I am very much working on.
There was a period in my life when I had a lot of doubt as a mother and a parent. I always felt I did not measure up and felt I couldnât handle everything. Secretly I wanted the support from others and was not getting it, because I was trying to escape my responsibility. Deep down I knew I had to face this, but I didnât know how. During this period of time my son reflected many mental illness traits that were not present when he was younger and I felt seriously burdened. I was on guard and nervous every day as I did not know what would come next for me to face. Eventually I worked on my own guilt of being a single mom, I no longer felt that I owed my son, I was able to stand up to him with less attachment, our communication went from non-existent to existent to sharing our feelings and enjoying each otherâs touch and company. Today my son has recovered from many of the anti-social traits with family and still progressing steadily in his commitment slowly back into society. And we both appreciate the support between us that has allowed us to heal many ingrained patterns.
‘It needs no physical presence for the relationship to deepen and for the love to grow.’ This makes so much sense when I am deepening my connection with love. If I put stumbling blocks in the way they are felt too. Remove them and love blossoms. And the blocks can appear reasonable, logical like if I don’t focus on the relationship it will wither and die. Included in that is if I feel off and focus on my connection with me and the relationship is placed to the side then that’s somehow selfish. But if I focus on a relationship and it’s not coming from my connection with the love that I am, then what is coming through? Then what is that relationship based on if it’s not love?
So this instantly brings up a topic I love to pretend I know nothing about…. Responsibility!!!!! I really don’t like the fact that how I am with myself affects all my loved ones because that takes away the reason I’ve adopted all these years not to deal with my own issues by way of putting everyone else first and in that falsely “helping” them by fixing their issues.
Knowing the only way to support them is by supporting myself is very confronting when feeling your feelings can be so tricky! Still it’s a great awareness to have and one I had quite a few years ago now and the quality of my relationships has also vastly improved as a result, but as with everything, there’s always more and the “helping” people thing has become a lot more subtle in my life so its good to be reminded about it.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â When I first heard these words I had a moment of asking how is this possible? But as with much of the wisdom that I have been presented over the last few years I sat with it and allowed myself to feel the truth that I had been offered. And yes, as I began to heal my hurts and the relationship with myself, some of the relationships with others close to me began to heal as well; some quickly and others slowly but surely. The big lesson here is that how I live affects everyone around me.
What a rich and empowering blog! Why is it so hard for us to accept that we are as grand and powerful as we are ?! Maybe life would be too simple then maybe ? đ
Not needing anyone to be a certain way allows the ultimate love, space. Realising and embodying that we never have to “do” anything to help another is huge, as we learn from young on, that we need to do something, to get a result. Accepting the own innate grandness is for me a ongoing development- it changed my whole way of living .The motion and effort we put ourselves under gets reduced, as true motion comes first from a surrender. Then we know exactly what needs to be done in form of physical action or if the biggest love is to just be present and being there.
I loved what you have shared Steffi, it is not in the doing that we help another, but in accepting our grandness and surrendering to this allowing us to move and live in a way where we will know what we offer to another in the way of love.
When we make all relationships about love and not just about getting our needs met, there is the opportunity for true intimacy.
When we hold another in the love of who they truly are, rather then try and change them to suit our picture or see them as their behaviours we give them the freedom to make their own decision of how they want to live.
Exactly Mary-Louise. It is that absolute imposition and hence the space that is allowed which then lets the other feel that there is no pressure, expectation or judgement placed on them. It is the greatest healing we can offer – in fact, that is the healing. We have dismissed for so long how sensitive each one of us is, that we have forgotten how simple it is to love someone.
‘We jump off the cliff’… alongside lots of gold in this article this phrase touched me, because it invites me to ongoingly relinquish control, conditions and any holding back in my relationships… it is an amazing feeling.
Very true Matilda… if we want to make our relationships about love we can’t settle for the cruise control button. A relationship that’s cruising is a relationship that has one stale. It’s a constant dive in – to ourselves, to access deeper parts of the never-ending love that we are and bring this to this plane of life. And it’s so so amazing doing this together, in relationship, as it has been intended.
I feel too that when we talk to someone who is not physically present or connected to us by skype , phone etc that the message we put out is still picked up. When we communicate lovingly in this way, with no attachment to outcome, we are offering a healing for ourselves and the other. It’s like planting a seed and when the conditions all come together for that seed to germinate more often than not it will and it does and it can continue to grow with love (support) from itself and others.
“There is the potential in each relationship to reflect back to us an aspect of the puzzle we are all here on earth to piece together.” There is no greater mirror to discover what we need to heal within ourselves than within the mirror of another person.
It needs a lot of courage to step aside of the well-trod path that we had set out from safety and a controlling way of living life and to “jump off the cliff knowing we will be held in Godâs love, which is our love. And so we go for it in full.”
Yes, it takes a lot of courage which can be supported by the honesty of admitting how all the other ways have fallen short of bringing us back to the love we are. All the other ways promised so much but deep inside we knew each one would bring us only complication and harm even if there was glitter on top trying to wow us for as long as possible.
Its like talking to an old friend that you have not spoken to for decades and feel that no time has passed and that you pick up where you have left off. These are markers for what is possible in all relationships.
Yes and the way in which we are holding one another as we express rather than coming from a judgement of how we ‘think’ we should all be living.
“being under the banner of right and wrong”… it is time for this banner to go. It has the world held so tight in its embrace and keeps us from being open to the truth of a situation and the incredible offering it is offering us when we get caught up in the right and wrong.
Indeed Sarah, the right and wrong banner we have accepted as being right to follow acts as a imprisoning, keeping us locked away from accessing the truth that would otherwise be simply available for us to live too and by in any situation that we would encounter in life.
What a wonderful reminder that rather than impose on another by feeling we have to be there to be part of their healing, we can work on dealing with our own ‘stuff’ our own emotional baggage and that also supports them. We have so much to learn about the unseen ties we all have with each other, the ones that drain, the ones that impose and hold another in guilt. If we deal with releasing ourselves and others from our own hooks, the ripple effect can be what it is but it will be without imposition from us, which can only be an incredible freedom!
We often have a tendency to think that we have to see a person physically and discuss with them to have a difference, yet what I love here is the reminder that energy is global, universal and we don’t need to be in physical proximity to people to inspire them.
I agree David – also lovely that wen we are with people we do not need to necessarily say anything to support them as our movements alone can bring the quality of healing to us and them.
When we take responsibility for our own healing we are reflecting back to others that they too can heal if they choose. Healing is never just for self it is for the all.
“when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what, it actually needs no passport! It needs no physical presence for the relationship to deepen and for the love to grow. ” beautifully said and the knowing of love and true relationships changes everything and allows a harmony and flow in our lives wherever we are across the world .”Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are.”
I have found it is in the wanting to be right or wrong where relationship issues start to happen and appear. Whether it be wanting to be right to embrace another or prove a point or being wrong and either giving in to compromise amd let the other person feel they have won or not wanting to admit or say when things are hard in fear of being judged for being wrong. It is crazy much we can use them to divide us.
Itâs quite profound isnât it, to consider that as we deepen in one relationship we deepen in all. There is no such thing as exclusivity in love.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â and so with this awareness come the realisation for me that we have a responsibility to hold them in love as they go through this process. This applies to everyone in our lives that we are in relationship with and not just our immediate family but work colleagues, friends and the people we meet regularly on a daily basis.
It is such a beautiful point Michael and that brings us to responsibility. Knowing that everything we do has an effect on everyone, not just those closest to us is a stop moment in itself asking so ok what I choose and the way I am matters.
True love is beholding of all, for how do we love the one, without also loving the many?
And this puts to bed for me the notion that there are different forms of love. Love is one unwavering heavenly quality that simply expands the more it is accessed and expressed.
‘…we allow some people to access some parts of us, but always with conditions and always with a get-out clause, which means we never let ourselves get too close?’ what a great question to ask of any and all relationships in our lives. In truth if we find this to be the case in one relationship it will be in all.
‘ If I was not seeing in my brother the grandness that he is, lurking underneath the turmoil he was in, I would look back at myself first. What was in me that was covering up the truth that love will always let you see?’ This is a wonderful practical question to ask oneself when the beauty of another is masked by something within us. There’s an inner beauty to us all. No matter if, on the outside, behaviours and energies are layered on top of it we can still see past them to the true being beneath. So what is it within me that maybe is obstructing me being able to connect with this?
“Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are â and this was my vantage point”. And this is an inspiring vantage point to hold with all we love so dearly.
Loving with no protective walls would mean letting people in to see all of who we truly are and letting out all of who we are.
Which is why we avoid it. Letting someone see all of who we truly are would be to reveal our greatness – and us to see that equal greatness in them. This would expose the lie of the way of living we have set up which is built on a premise very far away from the greatness we all are. And it would expose that this lie is of our own making.
I can definitely relate to leaving my country of birth to go and live in another country and leaving all my family behind and sometimes wondering how I can support them from afar so love what you are saying here that we can love people simply by committing to our own love and our movements of that love and that we donât have to be physically in the same place to do this.
This is what All of our relationships can be based on …”…when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what,” And I mean All, with people we are yet to meet, the shop assistant, our Grandma, the bus driver…why offer one person less than another, we all benefit and prosper when we make a commitment to Love and our expression.
“Because it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to” – and when you also talk beforehand about the stars Anonymous together with this line here i have pasted.. it makes me really deeply appreciate the beauty of the science of reflection that we do get from people who have re-connected to the stars and who shine, twinkle and bring heaven on earth as our own reminder. Simone Benhayon is just one of these such people for me… and also there are many others too that remind me of our grandness through their eyes.
Absolutely gorgeous – When we surrender to the appreciation of what we have connected to, when we claim the truth of who we are for ourselves, we then see this truth confirmed back to us though the eyes of so many.
I can relate to this very well. When we judge a situation or a person in any way and do not see their stupendousness we are negating our own stupendousness of love. The love that can hold another and all others in absolute equality and with them feeling this preciousness, true change is inevitable.
Love is a living intelligence, an intelligence of such magnitude that we can’t even begin to fathom how it works but in truth we don’t need to know how it does what it does, we just need to be love and then stand back and watch it do it’s work.
When we are just focused on and thus reduced to the physical realm we will think that connecting with another is only possible when our 5 senses somehow can communicate like seeing each other and talking on the phone etc. Of course that is an important part of our daily experience as human beings and very necessary, but actually we are in connection also when being alone, it is only the absence of physical ‘proof’ that is missing. Maybe it comes down to a very simple and practical question: Do I shut down or reduce/focus my awareness when being alone or do I stay open and aware of the interconnectedness we cannot escape.
It is beautiful to consider that love is a beholding light and how, any activity that comes thereafter is an expression of that light – a beautiful divine expression that holds you as equal.
How amazing that you had this awareness, Anonymous – “underlying it was clear that he was now feeling held by something bigger, something far stronger, than the seeming darkness of his immediate situation.” We are all held in love, no matter how far we contract or veer off track.
What a fascinating story and example of (long-distance) love Anonymous , and how that when we understand love is so much more than physical presence alone, that love operates and flows without borders or geographic confine to always reach the specified source.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â A science we have yet to fully explore and appreciate but extremely real nonetheless. When we study the world at the atomic level, we can appreciate the subtlety of subatomic communication. When we address our own self-care, it affects the particles in our bodies that in turn begin to emit a different message to the world, one that we are all earning to receive, the permission to love our selves deeply.
It is quite amazing when we notice that connections between people remain even at a long distance, not just in term of the memory but that there can be an actual influence and this blog is a good example.
That’s great. No matter how precise the measuring in relationships, it only leads to a muddle.
To pull to love is strong.
Recently I offered to help an elderly lady with her shopping . In our conversation it transpired that I was related to someone who she felt had wronged her. When we said goodbye she said that I had now redeemed that person. Our interaction had cleared the slate so to speak. From our loving ways others also get to experience more love.
I love this little story, Elaine, especially as there is no coincidence of who and when we meet people. It would seem that there was a true purpose for your meeting and a lot more going on energetically.
A very timely sharing and beautifully presented. I love your words ”LOVE doesn’t have right or wrongs it simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are”. Thank you Anonymous.
Yes, and this holding gives the other a choice, a choice that may be easier than without the holding.
I love that Richard – what a great byline as it were to start the day with đ Every day!
Yes, Richard, what you share here sounds like two completely different ways to be in relationship. When we take responsibility for ourselves, things are much more simple and clear with another.
The truth of our interconnectedness is something we avoid, because it shows us how responsible we need to be for all of our choices in daily life.
I’m experiencing something interesting with a member of my family they withdrew from life many years ago to some little hamlet in France and my contact with them has been erratic. But this last 6 months they have been making contact and it feels as though they come close and then withdraw itâs a yo-yoing effect. They get furious with me and can also be very loving. I understand that they are in a process of testing me and life again; that somewhere in their past life they have been very hurt and it is only in this life are they testing whether or not it is safe to trust again. I do not react to the fury; I encourage the love and have no expectation of what might happen. All I can do is live what I know to be true to me and if it resonates with another then so be it, if it doesn’t that’s cool too I’m not here to convert anyone just be all that I can be.
Dear Anonymous it was a great joy to read your amazing blog. “Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are . . . ” What would be happening in this world when more and more people would chose to live like this – just holding themselves and others in love. Perhaps this is one of the best medicine we all can prescribe to ourselves and than be simply curious what will happen . . .
Incredible how our relationships can change, deepen and develop even over long distances. We can use technology to connect in this way rather than distract ourselves away from life and relationships!
We cannot underestimate the impact we have on those around us – either we add to the issues and struggles and confirm that life is just this way, or we role model something else.
We cannot but be in relationship â with self, others and actually everything, but we can and in truth are responsible to define the kind of quality of this interconnectedness as we are either in harmony or disharmony and cannot avoid affecting the greater whole we are part of.
If we are true to ourselves it gives others the space to feel who they truly are too.
Your sharing is the conformation of our interconnectedness and reflects how big our impact on others can be.
This alone is amazing and explains love beautifully ‘Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are â and this was my vantage point. If I was not seeing in my brother the grandness that he is, lurking underneath the turmoil he was in, I would look back at myself first. What was in me that was covering up the truth that love will always let you see?’ Love is about holding another and ourselves in a space to just be and seeing the grandness of who they or we are regardless of what is being presented.
Openness is what leads to the potential of an opportunity being utilised.
Ain’t nothing coming through a closed door.
Yes indeed, it is very embracing and beholding of another to hold them as an equally divine being, regardless of the godliness or ungodliness of their choices.
Yes, the godliness or ungodliness of their choices…what a great expression. I get a sense there are many people in our lives who offer reflections to us and the opportunity to consider our own beliefs and judgements. They may have different means to address and cope, but what are their choices reflecting to us? perhaps ours are equal or more imposing to them.
This is a great example of our inter-connectedness and the sentient nature of our relationships. “As you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.”
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â
This sentence has remained firmly in my awareness since reading it and offered many opportunities to bring deeper healing to myself and thus others.
It can be so easy to focus all our love on another that not only do we give less to everyone else we also give less to ourselves. Yet when we simply are our all with everyone including ourselves then everyone benefits.
This clearly illustrates the power each of us have, and the responsibility we have to appreciate ourselves and what we bring. I can really see how not appreciating oneself is a very sneaky copout so as not to take that responsibility… and how in so doing we turn the volume knob down that little bit on the love that is literally right there in our bodies and beingness – to be expressed through our permission.
Relationships begin and end with a commitment to becoming intimate with ourselves and holding ourselves in the Light, and having established a foundation of love within that is steady and solid we can hold others in the same Light. I have been wowed by how relationships have changed and deepened as I have become more transparent and open and not held back from speaking my truth and ‘Because it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to’.
‘I can even go as far to say that a true relationship is the communication of Heaven in physical form.’ Thank you when we allow it. This is exactly what it is.
And that is what true magic is, healing our own hurts and living with true love will have effects beyond what we can fathom at the moment.
“Love remains at work, holding the other, as we hold ourselves and in that holding, immense healing takes place.” Beautifully said Anonymous… Love has no boundaries.
So true Paual, true love does indeed have no boundaries and yet what we have touted as love for centuries has come with the most ridiculous restrictions, demands and conditions. This in itself is a sure sign that it is not love.
There cannot be walls or limits when love can deepen unfathomably.
Very true Rosanna. Which is why saying yes to the love that we are and are here to reconnect to and bring in all that we do, brings the greatest freedom we could ever wish for. No escape from anything is needed when we say yes to the love that we are.
We live in a world that is nothing but love and yet for all intents and purposes it feels pretty loveless. And there is no one to blame but ourselves.
True Alexis, we make our own misery or we choose the love that is there.
“As you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â’ This is the ultimate understanding of being selfless whilst putting oneself first at the same time. To truly love oneself and to heal whatever hurts we’ve accumulated ultimately ripples across to everyone we know.
What we share with others is key, beyond what we say and what we physically do – people can feel the quality of how we are living, how we are growing and learning and moving through life and this has a major impact on their relationship to us
That phrase makes me laugh, but it is so true. In every moment whatever energy we are choosing and moving with is through us touching every single person and every area of life. This is constantly the case, without exception. Huge.
Connections are beyond time and distance as they are not something outside of ourselves but are living within.
Alex, that got me realising that our relationships are the externalisation of the connection we say yes to which are not limited to this plane of life. On this physical realm we have the relationships and friendships play out – but there is so much more at play. For we do not just operate on this one physical realm. Every relationship we have including the one with ourselves spans across many more dimensions, beyond the physical. When we begin to appreciate this, we start to grasp the majesty every relationship can bring to us and is.
Very well said, you are revealing that we are multidimensional beings and hence everything we do as well as all our relationships are multidimensional, ie. they are neither linear in time nor location, distance or direction but rather emanating spherically and touching and relating with much more than just the subject we may focus on.
Without relationships it simple doesn’t work. No-one can be everything by themselves, we need others to discover the whole and our own more hidden aspects. And we also need to work together to solve all the issues we encounter living on this earth.
Love just knows how to be love, its really very simple.
Relationships are always opportunities to develop ourselves but for that potential to be filled, there must be honesty and transparency first.
Barriers and borders do not keep energy out and that is why they don’t work.
What I am becoming aware of is the more I live in commitment to myself in all areas of my life the more loving my relationships are becoming. I cannot deny the fact that if it is true love I am looking for in my relationships I have to look within, at the behaviours and how I am living first.
Thank-you Anon for exploring this pearl of wisdom and sharing the might of its lived truth.
The ‘might of its lived truth’. That is absolutely beautiful Lucinda.
If we are committed to living and speaking our truth then every relationship we have will be about love, including the one with ourselves.
Reading this has inspired me to skype, my sister, once a month to catch up on how her life is going, and to build that connection with each other.
Love this to bits….Iâm oozing with love, power and the commitment I bring to healing my hurts even more so. I resonate deeply with all youâve shared here, Anonymous for I too have had a similar family situation I thought I had to fix and be there for and yet have realised over time, how truly connected we are when I come from the mutual grandness in us all. Itâs never about having the solutions but in allowing the vastness to flow through and reflect from us. A gorgeous communication that truly heals whether youâre there or not. Thank you!
Thank you Anonymous for sharing such a powerful inspiration of the importance of keeping committed to what one knows is true for oneself and the ripple effect that this then has on others.
What a gorgeous and true statement: “Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are”. And this holds just as true for ourselves as it does for every other person.
Thanks, Anonymous. You had me at ‘relationships are precious’. Everything is there for us to learn and grow if we simply open our hearts.
Now that is what I call power: ‘The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in.’ It is palpable for me and others that each time I walk into a building holding myself in absolute love, everyone gets the same (treatment).
A great point to raise how no matter if we ignore it or acknowledge it – there is magic in relationships, a connection between 2 people that is very powerful and almost a magnetic pull. Relationships inspire one another – it is not 2 pieces coming together but 2 people working together.
Such a beautiful blog to read, thank you anonymous! I’m contemplating the words you received from the esoteric practitioner years ago and am marveling at the wisdom they contain and also the potential of what they offer to everyone. I have found it a slow process to let go of the hurts and judgments etc that creep into my relationships, but am feeling inspired after reading the blog to deepen my commitment to my relationship with myself, knowing that this has a ripple effect out to all other relationships I have.
‘Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are’. Beautiful Anon.
I am beginning to get a sense of what is on offer when I hold myself when I am with another… no agenda or conditions but absolute love.
As part of a re structure I have started to do some ‘cold sales’ calls this means that the company I’m calling does not know me or the product I’m selling, and to be honest I haven’t done this type of selling for years. But what I noticed is that I have no worries about whether I will be accepted or not. We all know that most people dislike cold sales calls, but I’m having fun just connecting to the person on the other end of the phone. I actually do not have to sell anything except genuine love and affection and I’m really enjoying just connecting to the people I talk to, they can feel my joy and it is infectious.
Anonymous, reading this makes me realise that I have not made a commitment to making relationships about love first and foremost, this I can feel makes all of the difference, and stops relationships being based on a need; ‘What I have learnt is that when a relationship is based on a commitment to bringing love to it no matter what, it actually needs no passport!’
Gorgeous realising that each of us can offer a piece of the puzzle of life to one another. Great reminder to appreciate the reflection received through others, as well as embrace the responsibility in our own expression..
I wonder if the brother’s falling apart was in any way triggered by you leaving? Your response to your brother has been amazing!
“Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are â and this was my vantage point.” How awesome it is to feel that the more we deepen and cherish our relationship with self the more we are able to hold others with the same love. Love beholds all equally not matter who we are. Simply beautiful.
Looks vs love, boundaries and borders vs brotherhood… the things society promotes as âvaluesâ to take into our relationships not only with partners but family, friends, colleagues and other people around the world are so skewed yet so well designed to âfitâ the agenda of creating separation rather than treating others with true care and respect. Just think about it; if we didnât treat people differently based on their looks and instead treated everyone as absolute equals, then would we have the âborder problemsâ we have today? Itâs fascinating how what weâve set up feeds into and sets up more things to keep us apart.
Taking responsibility to heal ourselves has affects we cannot fathom. A great example of this anon.
That’s it Bernadette. Takes all the trying and struggling out of the picture. All that is needed is for us to make a commitment to heal our own hurts. When we do this we heal more than we realise.
‘As you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â This just makes sense as we are all connected so how we hold ourselves obviously affects all others. It’s a great thing to remember when we have gone into being concerned about another not evolving, or doubt what we can actually bring.
“I would have needed to accept my power as well. The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in.” I think you hit the nail on the head here A. and maybe it is for this reason that we want to hold on to our hurts and reasons why we don’t let others in completely.
I often see as a practitioner if one person heals something within themselves or get’s awareness on a pattern they can then let go of this always immediately impacts their relationships. I have so many accounts of people who’s relationships with children, parents, partners, colleagues and friends have changed that there is indisputable evidence that healing ourselves is offering a healing to all others in our lives as well.
Your blog and story is just ABSOLUTE GOLD, many times I have reflected upon it today after reading this yesterday .. in a phone conversation this morning with a friend and then throughout my day at work reminding myself 1. just how much of a difference we can make to others just through our livingness and 2. Am I 100% committed to love and life and if not why not .. what is stopping me? and 3. What healing (re hurts etc) is there that I still need to heal that in by doing this would have a positive ripple affect/healing on others. Also it just goes to show the affect we have on others even on the other side of the world!!! I am so glad you shared this. Just stunning ⨠And also what incredibly wise words from your esoteric practitioner.
This is such a great way to view relationships and this blog holds the keys to dealing with all relationship issues – that if we stop sensing and holding the other person in the grandness that they truly are, despite any behaviours to the contrary, then rather than blaming and/or judging the other person for it, we can stop and look at our own ‘stuff’ and read what is coming up for us that is preventing us from holding the other in love. What is it we are demanding or expecting from the other person which is generating the reaction? Love does not have demands or expectations.
I find that relationships are completely transformed when we take responsibility for our part and do not look to the other person to be what we want or need -if we understand that we are all responsible for our own evolutionary path, and giving another the space to discover and learn for themselves is part of what love is all about.
Beautifully said Meg and a great reminder that ‘relationships are completely transformed when we take responsibility for our part and do not look to the other person to be what we want or need’; this is so important.
I like that Monica – the lens of love which can easily get clouded by our own perceptions, hurts and ideas which we bring in and distort our view so that we stop being aware of the grandness that is all around us constantly.
What I am feeling when I read this blog again is that our passports are linked to our identities and it is our identities and what we identify with that mostly gets in the way when it comes to issues in our relationships. So when we put love first we have no need for any identities, ideals, beliefs, backgrounds, cultures, nationalities or even likes and dislikes. Our connection through the common thread of wanting to love and be loved supersedes all of these superficial differences.
Very true Andrew. I wonder if that is why as a human race we tend to baulk up on love. We crave it, seek it in desperation, go for empty substitutes – and is this not because deep down we know that in this love that we are, when we accept it and are it, we lose the sense of identity we have worked so hard at having?
I love your comment, Andrew, so true. Passports are for me identical with borders and protection. Whereas why would we want to focus on what separates us when we can focus on love and what unites us?
I am with you on this, Jane. Carers often give everything they have away to ones they care for instead of sharing what is there. Without deep self-care and deepening the relationship with ourselves, each of us is lost.
‘Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are’.
I love being held in this love and love holding another in this empowering energy. In the end each of us has the key to everything at hand inside and it is often only a matter of giving ourselves permission to let it out.
Hmmm yes Monica, the ‘Lens of Love’ â fogged by our issues, but cleared through that commitment to knowing ourselves and others by our true quality.
“it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to” If we are all from the same source then it stands to reason that we have this powerful effect on one another when it is the same love that runs through each of us.
Technology has made the world a much smaller and accessible place but only love gives us true connection.
Recently I visited some friends whom I haven’t see in 11 years and we hardly kept in touch during our time apart. But when we spent time together, we realised that the time we spent apart and the distance we lived from each other didn’t affect our relationship. It felt like those 11 years were more like a few days ago. So, when love and connection is present, time seems to shrink in the most loving way.
Living proof that the more we learn to treasure our selves the more it has a magical effect on others. If we want other people to change their lives, then we need to be embodying the principles that we are craving them to adopt. So often we prop each other up through our self-created neglectful patterns. It is very powerful when one family member breaks the habit and establishes a new norm. It enables us to re-orientate our selves back to self-respect and self-responsibility even when the connection is remote.
This to me is a huge ouch!, for humanity because how many of us live this way
“The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in.”
This shows me that unfortunately we live in an expendable, loveless society.
“I can even go as far to say that a true relationship is the communication of Heaven in physical form. What we exchange amongst each other is far from merely physical, emotional and spiritual â it is in fact, the exchange of the entire universe with the vastness of the stars coming through one divine spark to the other. Because it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to.” This is an exquisite definition of relationships. Relationships give us the opportunity to see ourselves reflected.
Leonne, reading this makes me appreciate my relationships more, knowing that there is a reason we have come together and that there is potential learning and evolution for both of us; ‘Relationships are precious. There is the potential in each relationship to reflect back to us an aspect of the puzzle we are all here on earth to piece together.’
The illusion that we get amazing relationships delivered on our lap is one of the most harmful ideals to which we have become attached. You clarify this beautifully Anonymous and then go one step further to show how the way we are affects everyone else in this world, regardless of the borders that we know. The choices we make everyday have serious consequences for us all. Rather than stamps in passports, perhaps we should have confirming marks indicting how loving we have been. Our choices are the only thing holding us back in this world.
I find this amazing that how we live on one side of the planet affects our family on the other. It is another example showing how we are all connected – and in fact that how we live affects everybody on the planet. I certainly find that friends across the world are all ealing with the same issues as me, or making the same discoveries, having revelations that are similar. We truly are a one humanity.
Doesn’t it Carmel… it clearly illustrates how every movement we make does have an impact everywhere. It is a grand concept to grasp because for a long time we shunned away from that responsibility. But the reality is, we are all very powerful beings, and how we choose to use or abuse that power is what it comes down to for each of us.
Wow anonymous what a powerful revelation about relationships. It is gorgeous reading that each of us are divine sparks through which the vastness of the universe touches another. Indeed “it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to.” So beautifully put.
So isnât it wonderfully powerful when we nominate that which we allow takes us away from living who we are so that we can live and hold a greater love from within ourselves and hence bring and offer to the all.
I find that the more healing I do for myself the more I am able to offer to others including the close members of my family. As a result they have made choices to heal too. We can inspire simply by choosing to live in a way that is true and vital. It is always noticed and others are free to be inspired or not.
Wow wow wow, what an article – what a healing offered. when I read “Love remains at work, holding the other, as we hold ourselves and in that holding, immense healing takes place.” the hairs all over my body stood on end – these words also having the same meaning for when someone has passed over. Love always remains and in our universe of interconnectiveness whatever we are doing always affects another even if they are no longer on this plane of life.
And I too will say that I agree with Anonymous in sharing that as we heal, those around us heal too, and this means that anyone who is connected to us in some way will also heal, and hence it is a win win for all, though the healing process may not always be pleasant to experience!
Hello Anonymous, and thank you for sharing about your experience and the connections you have had with your loved ones despite the distance in kilometers! I too have moved from Europe to Australia and have my family living in Europe in various parts, and thankfully in many ways we have learned to deeply appreciate the skype calls and the emails and all the little ways of communication, which certainly do not stop us from feeling close to each other!
Anonymous, I love this; ‘Love remains at work, holding the other, as we hold ourselves and in that holding, immense healing takes place.’ It feels really important to remember that it is not how much time we spend with someone but the quality we are in and the quality in which we hold others.
That’s so true Rebecca, and what a healing that revelation in itself brings. We don’t have to try or fix anything. In fact we don’t have to do anything. All that is asked of us is to love.
If we make our relationship with ourselves about love and nothing else, then by default we make all of our relationships about love and nothing else.
Thank you Anon for sharing how love literally moves mountains… and that it surrounds and supports us constantly. I have found something similar with moving from Australia to Canada 4 years ago, in that I could see things so much clearer with distance, and have witnessed miraculous changes in all our family back in Australia. Family members who are doing things that they never thought they would in this life, and I know this is because of how we live here and with no perfection how we are with them. Your blog has made me stop and appreciate this but also has brought home the responsibility we have to not just ourselves… but everyone.
Love it Aimee, the writer is not alone in their experiences!
I definitely agree with the last line. Wonderfully said as it is very true. Nothing of this world is ever perfect, we make mistakes, we get things happening in ways we may not have desired. Yet it is our expression that ultimately allows this world to feel and exhibit the grand and gloriousness we truly are within.
I love this – no trying, just being and no expectations.
A willingness to heal – to look at all the things that are not us and essentially baggage – is a huge step to being able to support our bodies and other relationships. With healing we are a reflection of love for others – and this sharing is so powerful in the possibility of what true healing brings.
I love your last paragraph. We can try reducing what is to whatever the size we think we can handle and try convincing ourselves, but the truth remains the same, it is much grander than what we can possibly imagine.
Awesome Anonymous! Relationships are the most important thing we have to get right or truly to live for. Everything else is a byproduct.
And if we live this model of our relationships, there will be no need for national borders and actual passports!
Spot on Michael, and so it is exposing that we have made national borders and actual passports as a means to separate, rather than bring together and Unite!
I have experienced this in relationships. it is an absolute joy to meet someone you haven’t seen for some time and feel how the love has deepened between you both.
Thank you Abby. I have this experience too and yet had not really felt in to what this was about. Very lovely.
Love is the foundation of all relationships.
It is so true that “…the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in” too. If we are truly loving with ourselves then we will be just as loving with all others.
The power of love is truly a blessing… thank you for sharing Anonymous.
Thank you Anon. Your blog clearly shows that working on oursleves and living the grandness we are to best of our ability has an impact on others wherever our location in the world is, and our connection with each other by far exceeds skpye or the telephone or being there in person. Wise words your practitioner shared with you.
Thank you, Anonymous, for sharing with us the miracle of love.
“The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in.” Life’s Base camp.
And life’s key to true power.
And it will eventually one day be this way – where there are no longer the physical boundaries and borders that we have in the world now. These are man-made and an extension of the borders carved within ourselves, the separation to our own inner most conection and from there to everybody else.
Once we shift this within, the landscape without will also change. And one day, we really will no longer have the need for passports.
“If we make relationships about âyou do your bit, I do my bit and then our needs will meet in the middleâ, we donât need to consider the powerful ripple effect that is happening anyway between us” – This is an excellent point. If every one of our movements makes ripples and we are in the same ‘sea’/pool, then there is no middle ground and we are actually responsible all of the time for our relationships even when we might not be with people face to face.
Really blown away with the beauty expressed in this blog. The way back to who we are is through love and this love canât help but express itself with another.
This is a amazing wake up call to the responsibility that we all have for how we are in all our relationships and that there is no need to be physically present for our love to be felt and the ripple effects of this to have profound impacts way beyond what we may imagine.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â This is quite a statement isn’t it, but until actually witnessed it can be hard to believe. Through your example you show that the principle of ‘everything is energy’ and everything is connected, is true.
This is so true, it is not what is said or done it is our consistency steadiness and holding of love that allows others to heal.
Why do we spend our lives like a cactus that only allow certain people in? Why not be a flower that is for everyone to enjoy our beauty and take our nectar with you.
‘The quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in’. Anonymous thank you. I can relate to what you share having experienced something similar in my own family. When we stop trying to fix others, but instead deepen our relationship and love for ourselves, the healing ripple has no bounds or boundaries.
Thank you Anonymous for sharing such a profound and inspirational story; a beautiful, lived example of what can happen when we are willing to heal ourselves from what is on offer from the reflections that occur in our lives.
Thank you, truly inspiring to read about the power of love and your commitment to continually discard anything that got in the way of holding your brother with love.
To let go of the self and completely make love our foundation we become the powerhouses in the world that are needed to heal all the hurts in people and to remove all the pollution we have dumped to the earth we live on too.
We need to keep bringing it back to ourselves, over and over and over again because it is only by returning ourselves to love that we will be able to return the world to love. There is no other way.
Anonymous you have defined relationships in a way that few other people would and yet your definition is one that deep down each one of us knows.
It is so healing to read this and such an amazing confirmation of the healing power of love when we get ourselves out of the way.
I have been learning that and feeling how true it is that Love doesn’t have a right or wrong, Love holds you and everyone equally in Love. This is a huge one to crack, to feel and to realise that it actually has nothing to do with what you are defending but connecting to what is truly there on offer.
Yes Natalie, there is nothing in life to defend, even not the love that we may have chosen as the foundation of our lives as love just is love whatever we may think.
Goodness gracious me … what an absolutely stunning expression and blog. Everyone in the world should read this, boy oh boy it says so much but most of all what stood out for me right at the beginning was when you said ‘commitment to love’ and what I got from this even more is when we truly, deeply commit to love and to holding others in this love, miracles do indeed happen. Thank you so much for sharing this .. pure magic ⨠and super inspiring
“but underlyingly it was clear that he was now feeling held by something bigger, something far stronger, than the seeming darkness of his immediate situation.” Could you imagine if we were all held in this love?
Because it is through relationships that we remember the stupendous grandness we are from and that we are all, eventually, heading back to. Beautifully said Anonymous, relationships offer reflections back to us and from us and when love is at the helm, true evolution is a given.
This power we have is amazing and undeniable. Appreciating how much I accept all you’ve said is actually quite lovely, yes there are greater levels of awareness to this which is also saying love has no boundaries. I may not live this expression but I do know I’ve scratched the surface on acceptance of this. Love is an emanation that keeps on going once it’s expressed. We can heal so much, people can resist but not forever and once they stop resisting they’ll know the love that’s been there waiting all along.
The very beautiful thing is, that even when someone resists it actually doesn’t ‘matter’ as such. That is because their bodies have received the impress of a way of being that resonates as absolutely true to it – because our bodies are designed to live in harmony and in brotherhood. So even when one resists, the marker of the love they have felt (because it is always felt even when denied) is forever with them,. It’s a marker that will activate when they are ready to say yes to what was offered. That could be 10 years from now, or 150 years from now. Everyone does return in their own time – all we need to do is reflect the love we have remembered and now live.
‘I can even go as far to say that a true relationship is the communication of Heaven in physical form.’ Absolutely divine and so true, and from this, I am beginning to see how powerful it is when we live in true relationship with ourselves, with people and with God. This highlights to me how important relationships are and what they offer us in every moment and in every opportunity to reflect heaven on earth.
This is something we need to realise ourselves every moment of our life ; ‘The power each one of us has in that the quality we hold ourselves in, is the quality we hold all others in.’
WOW! This blog is incredible, powerful and deeply inspiring. ‘A true relationship has no walls and no protection.’ I realise how thick and high my walls are that I have created over the years and it has been confronting lately when I realised how many walls are still present, strong and thick (maybe even doubled layered), blocking the flow of love. I want to break them down, dismantle every piece of these thick walls, but strangely, a part of me finds this difficult because I have been so used to using them as a security blanket, a way to keep people out and not evolve. After reading your blog, it blew me away, well, it also blew parts of my walls away. Thank you, for sharing this heavenly expression.
This is such a big lesson, ‘love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are’. I am really in the process of seeing how much I operate from hurt and in this life becomes about trying to make people right and wrong. It doesn’t allow them to be and hold them in love which is much more freeing for them and for you.
This shows how much we affect everybody else in all that we do and how we already support each other simply by taking deep care of ourselves and healing our own hurts and pain.
Indeed not much is required if we live from a connection to love within us, a grand origin that we all belong to.The world without makes no sense. Living accordingly is the most important ever, forget our nationality, our pasport, our physical appearance, our reputation, our job, our status or achievements itself.. Nothing actually counts more when than the love you have lived and built in your life and with others.
One of the very interesting things I have discovered about healing is that it does not always mean we get better or the symptoms go away. I have a friend recently who underwent a massive and very joyful healing and in that she was riddled with terminal cancer and passed away, whilst another one of my friends also went through a healing and her apparently terminal cancer has gone into remission. There is so much more to true energetic healing than may at first appear on the surface.
Thank you Anon, what a beautiful blog and yes it is indeed something when we connect to the immense power and responsibility we each bring.
This is such an exquisite sharing that shows that how we are in relationships matter and that there are opportunities for all in every relationship – nothing can ever be underestimated.
Wow that is so amazing that as you worked on deepening your relationship and healing your hurts, this reflection was felt by others around you. Such a joy to read and truly appreciate the extent to which we are more connected than we may think with each other.
Anonymous, wow what an amazing article, having family across the world I find this very supportive to read knowing that I can hold them in love no matter how far apart we are – very beautiful, thank you.
A very beautiful sharing showing us how every movement we make has the power to heal or harm another anywhere else in the world. This is true responsibility.
The quality I hold myself in is power. Nothing I do or achieve but how I hold myself is what brings forth the grandness we are. Such simplicity yet since I havenât lived this it makes sense that a part of me hasnât wanted to be grand despite the efforts that have been dressed to be greater and grander from an illusionary low point.
Indeed whilst we hold onto hurts and attachments we cannot but affect those around us in ways we may not always truly want. To truly support another we must also equally let go of hurt and embrace the love we are.
‘Love doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately are’… and because of that, there are not expectations or demands, just the observation, acceptance and confirmation of what already there is between each other in its continuous expansion.
Nothing is more inspiring for someone than to see us heal our hurts, showing it is possible and simple to do. If we are in fixing mode we can say the words of what the other should do but it is in the end always because we do not want to feel the hurt of the other person doing what they are doing, and the hurt of knowing we do this in an area of life as well. Super inspiring, thank you.
Our need to not see what is around us means we allow behaviour that is very harming and abdicate responsibility for having a choice in that behaviour.
âAs you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.â . . . . so beautifully stated and so true. The most loving thing for us to do for all the people we love so dearly is to heal our own hurts and live life in the fullness of who we are by following the impulses of our inner heart. All will benefit from our taking responsibility for ourselves.
Very true Kathleen and isn’t it so beautiful how it takes away any notion of trying? We don’t need to save, fix or strive for anyone or anything. Our one job is to love. To love with our all, and to open up more and more to the infinite vastness of our love every single day.
We tend to go about our days not registering the impact we have on others. I know for myself, I don’t tend to appreciate the qualities I bring enough – which is in fact irresponsible. We are all here to reflect a unique piece of a humongous jigsaw puzzle that is straight for Heaven to lead us back to Heaven. That in fact, is our purpose. And – it can be a lot of fun đ
“What was in me that was covering up the truth that love will always let you see?” – this is such an incredible way of viewing life, of seeing other people and relationships. Rather than seeing the other person as the issue, it is recognising that within everyone no matter the issues they are facing or the issues between us, there is an inner essence that is untouched or tarnished, and if we are unable to see or connect to it in another then we need to look at what is getting in the way
We have a far greater impact on people than we like to believe.
Wow anonymous, you share with us the power of holding steady in our truth and love and what it can bring when we see another also from the truth of them.
Wow I love your last sentence ! Magnificent beings we all are, with enormous power to heal.
What an amazing journey of the power of true healing in our livingness and love. This is a beautiful sharing and learning of what is possible with true communication and relationships to treasure and know.
âLove doesnât have right and wrongs. It simply holds the other person in the grandness they innately areâ. I could feel these words of wisdom flow through every particle of my body as I read them and then read them again. I can feel that this is a truth that I have always known but had buried deep inside but now that I have acknowledged it I can feel the grandness that I am, that we all are.
Wow – what incredible and powerful truth you have expressed Anonymous. Your blog helps me to see that sympathy has absolutely no place in relationships. In fact we use sympathy to deny our own responsibility. If we live love others will feel it – this is the best medicine we can offer.
Love knows no boundaries or borders literally and this includes the ‘borders’ and ‘boundaries’ we put up between us as people as well as geographical ones.
Wow, I love this, especially the last part when it becomes about relationships being a communication from heaven. I am only beginning to get a grasp of how interconnected we all are, and each time something occurs that confirms this, I feel absolute joy inside, in being a part of something so very grand.
Thanks Anonymous, this was a good blog for me to read as I live on the other side of the world to my mum and often feel guilt for not being there to support her in her later years. So knowing that the work I am doing on myself is supporting her and various others back home that I have felt I should have been there for is great to know.
This is a gorgeous way of evaluating our relationships and a great question; do we communicate our ‘everything’ and all the love in the world to every person we come into contact with? Can you imagine what would happen if we did!
‘As you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal’. These words really struck me too as I read them because it takes away any need for trying, for needing to get things right, for doing, fixing or rescuing. With holding ourselves in love and the other with love and with a willingness to heal we, without imposition, reflect to another that it’s possible for them to heal too and there is a natural pull towards love.
Brilliant blog Anonymous, no matter how well intentioned our motives might be it is an important matter of honesty that we admit we want issues to go away. For when we are in this mode as you beautifully show we canât hold ourselves or others in Love.
A beautiful blog on the power of love. Our relationships can reflect this or not depending on how we choose to live and express. What we choose to emanate has a huge effect on everyone else, whether we like to admit this or not.
This is a powerful blog, anonymous in the sharing of your experience. To clearly see how our re-connection with ourselves and how the power of our own healing can support another, whilst we hold them in love, is miraculous. Of course, your brother had to choose the change, but this platform was made easier and possible because of you. It defies all our current thought about healing and the individuality we hold ourselves in.
Relationships are a great reminder of the grandness we are from when we choose to be ourselves and bring the love we are to others. Then we have no need or expectations rather allow the love to unfold and deepen which is truly magical. If we bring anything less then it is not truly a relationship, atleast not all that it could be. And this is the case with everyone, irrespective of whether they are your initimate partner or not.
” If I was not seeing in my brother the grandness that he is, lurking underneath the turmoil he was in, I would look back at myself first. What was in me that was covering up the truth that love will always let you see?” Wow! What a reflection.
Brilliant blog Anonymous – exposing solutions as being quick fixes rather than true long-term healing.
That which is so complex is so simple when the truth is understood about everything being inter-related and the fact that we do affects everything and everyone else energetically Worldwide.
‘As you heal, those in close relationship with you will also heal.’
A loving relationship with another does not depend on a physical presence as it offers the opportunity to feel as does a love of God deepen the more we feel the love.
What an amazing journey back to one’s self and the ripples it creates all around us… that is always just a choice away for all of us!
So well said â when we don’t hold another in love first, despite all outer appearances to the contrary, we get into right and wrong and should and shouldn’t. Remorse and guilt are oftentimes the consequences. And that means that we add to the sludge in the world, to the created mess of emotions, issues and conundrums. Love, this way of living is not.
This article highlights the absolute necessity for each of us to again find that spark we have within, to begin to and with consistency love ourselves, in full, warts and all. For this is the very basic foundation to healing our hurts, as they present, no rush, no push, but a clear commitment to do so. Our power is needed, world wide, it is our truest way of being a human being.
Never again can we underestimate our power once we have read this article.
Thank you for these incredibly inspiring and restoring words. Love is not dependent on geography. It is universal and unifying, for it is the grandness we are and are from. When this is connected to and lived, such love beholds and bathes all others in this. Love is who we are.
…and how can one not be in love with that fact.
Love does not need a passport as it has no boundaries.
“What we exchange amongst each other is far from merely physical, emotional and spiritual â it is in fact, the exchange of the entire universe with the vastness of the stars coming through one divine spark to the other.”- These words are like music to my ears and I can feel that they are themselves from Heaven, Anonymous. This blog really shows where our true power lies, through inspiration, but also proves that all our movements and actions have an affect on others at an energetic level that has nothing to do with physical contact. Truly amazing we are when we accept that responsibility as you have demonstrated here.
‘Music to my ears’ too Michael, bringing home that through our reflection another sees the divine spark they also are. Change your movements, speak in a way you don’t usually or eat something you never do… and people notice. Within our every day we have the choice to confirm another to make loving steps again or continue on the harming path they are on.