A little over 2000 years ago, a baby boy was born. One version of his story presents how this baby boy, in spite of his humble birth, was visited by a host of people all bearing him gifts: Wise Men, shepherds, possibly even angels. The shepherds brought lambs, the angels, their adoration and the Wise Men brought gold, frankincense and myrrh.
Perhaps a more philosophical reading of the latter gesture indicates a greater significance in its symbolic meaning – a conferring upon the baby of the potential for, or confirmation of, his own inner connection to Love, Wisdom and Divine Intelligence.
Either way we look at it, this baby boy was celebrated at his birth in a way that befits the birth of a Son of God and was feted with the qualities one would rightly assign to such a being. This baby boy later lived and shared these qualities with the world and eventually his life became the cornerstone of one of the current institutionalised religions in our world, Christianity, named after Jesus the Christ.
Notwithstanding that several interpretations have been overlaid upon the life of Jesus over the years, it can assuredly be said that his life did fulfil the promise of those ‘gifts’ conferred upon him, or confirmed as being within him at his birth.
In our current times, 353,000 babies are born each and every day, with a little over half of these babies being boys (1). Hence, there are over 176,500 baby boys born daily. This equates to over 65 million baby boys born every single year.
It is surely worth considering what physical gifts and/or qualities we bring to them. How do we welcome them into this world? What are the first imprints they receive, not just from their immediate, close family, but from all of us?
In the more affluent societies, most if not all babies are ‘showered’ with physical gifts – toys, nappies, engraved cups and spoons, greetings cards to welcome the new baby and for boys, largely blue items of clothing. These baby boys seem to ‘have it all’ when compared to their peers in less affluent countries, who are born into poverty, sickness, war and conflict. On one level they are most certainly more fortunate. However, what energy precisely comes with these packages of ‘blue’ based gifts, qualities, beliefs and expectations? In what quality of energy do we collectively welcome baby boys into this world?
Based on personal experience and observation, what I see is that from the moment the baby takes his first physical breath, the process of imprinting involves the imposition of some very weighty ideals, beliefs and pictures, which severely reduce and restrict his innate expression.
As a child is born, there is a moment of absolute grace where those present behold the new life in a genuine sense of awe and wonder.
Shortly thereafter, he is also greeted by the often heavy expectations of his immediate and extended family, who are themselves the subjects of the same societally dictated concepts about what it is to be a boy and what it is to be a man; concepts that are then projected onto the physically vulnerable, newborn baby.
The first conversations are often about the baby’s physicality. Does he have long legs? He’s going to be a runner. Is his build more stocky? A lifetime of rugby ahead for him! Does he clench his fists? Likely to be a boxer. It is not uncommon for families to drape their newborns in the colours of their favourite sporting team from the moment of birth. Others discuss and anticipate what career the child will take up later in life – will he be a carpenter, a doctor, a musician, an entrepreneur who will uphold the family name, make money, be a success? Much of this occurs as the child sleeps and ostensibly without any awareness on the part of the extended family of how it affects him, for good or for ill.
In some hospitals there is an anecdotal saying that when there are more boys born than girls, it presages the advent of war. Globally, there are always more boys than girls born – the ratio is 105:100 (2) Are we then implying that we are always going to be at war and do such beliefs endorse the tough, competitive, even aggressive image of what it means to be a man?
Such impositions are everywhere. I once mentioned to a friend that her newborn was distressed by the noise and the energy of the TV. Her reply was that she had observed the same thing, mentioned it to the medical staff and was advised that the baby, who was a week old, needed to get used to it.
Part of the mix can also be the emotional needs of the mother. I have often heard mums refer to their newborn sons as ‘my little man,’ and observed how the baby can at times be assigned the role of fulfilling mum’s need to feel needed.
Do any of these imprints support the baby boy to connect with what he innately is? Or do they undermine it?
Is it possible that the baby boy born a little over 2000 years ago came into a family who themselves lived in a way that honoured the qualities of tenderness, inner connection, Soul, Love, Wisdom and Divine Intelligence? Did his teachers, elders and other members of his community also live thus and so nurtured the baby boy to unfold his divine potential, clearing the path for him so that he knew how to clear the path for so many others?
We are none of us born into a vacuum and naturally look to others to reflect and to confirm who we are. Especially as children, as newborns, we need to be nurtured in a manner that supports our unfolding development of our inner qualities. However, is it the case that we can only do this for our baby boys, for all of our children, once we have offered to, and unfolded this, for ourselves?
Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves?
Do we need to be Soul-connected ourselves to truly welcome a Soul-connected being coming into the physical body in a way that confirms its absolute divinity? I feel that we do and that it is only then that we can move on from imposing our collectively held ideals, pictures, concepts and beliefs to expressing a true welcome from the inner-heart like:
Dear little child of mine
May the rays of Heaven shine
May you know just how Divine
All the wonders you bring to our lives
As you live and as you grow
May you forever always know
How grand and special you are
Bright as the light of a star
Dear little child of mine.
(Michael Benhayon GM Records)
Does not every child, every baby boy, deserve to be welcomed in this way, honoured in the simplicity of all that he is? And is this the only gift he truly ever needs, confirmed and lived daily by all those around him?
Permission from Michael Benhayon for the use of the Little Child of Mine lyric at the end of this blog.
- How Many Babies Are Born Each Day? (n.d.). Retrieved August 04, 2017, from http://www.theworldcounts.com/stories/How-Many-Babies-Are-Born-Each-Day
- Sex Ratio. (n.d.). Retrieved August 04, 2017, from http://www.searo.who.int/entity/health_situation_trends/data/chi/sex-ratio/en/
“Boys will be Boys”…I Don’t Think So
Men – Are we set up to fail?
Real men don’t cry
“Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves?” – Probably one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves at anytime in our lives as this is what we reflect to everyone around us.
Today I have been in the company of a beautiful 7 year old boy, to try to win his attention by distracting him with presents or food would be an insult to this little wise wonderful being.
Every young boy that is born into this world is a Son of God so needs to be celebrated and appreciated accordingly.
Everyone deserves to be treated and supported to become who they truly are. It is sad to see, what images and ideals gets put on boys and girls- it feels like a “brain wash” from young on to not be a threat for the “normal” to change or to challenge. It took me years to erase all of the pictures that I carried about being a woman and what it needs and there are still some certainly hidden left. Nowhere is the truth reflected so it is great that this blog exist. Thank you Coleen for highlighting the fact that we are manipulated from young on to not become who we truly are.
It really is time to let go of all the ideals, beliefs and pictures we hold around boys and all men in fact, if the current suicide rates are anything to go by it is clear men are struggling to be met and appreciated for who they truly are and are needing to feel the space to express more openly and honestly.
There was a moment of grace between us when my daughter was born after a long labour. I gazed on her exquisite innocence and beauty totally present with nothing els in the way. It wasn’t long before the impositions began, my anxieties, my possessiveness, my ideals, my control. This affected much of her life until she started to know and claim herself for the Divine woman she is. You are so right Coleen, we need to be in that quality ourselves to give birth. She gave me a gift by reflection of the Divine in me the moment she was born, and now continues to do so. How awesome is that, and very precious.
“Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves?” What a great question for us all to ponder on, whether you are a parent or not.
Yes in the end we only bring to another person what we are living in every single day of our lives. Whatever we do or say, only what we live in our bodies will be received… This goes for babies and all of us really at any age.
Wow the fact that “in some hospitals there is an anecdotal saying that when there are more boys born than girls, it presages the advent of war” says so much. Conversations such as this are so needed for us to wake up to the imposition and harm our attitudes, beliefs and throw-away lines may be having on children as they are sussing out how to be and express themselves in the world.
‘In what quality of energy do we collectively welcome baby boys into this world?’ – this question gave me cause to stop and consider all the gifts I have chosen and given to people, young and old, during my life and question what energy they may have been laced with. An awesome reminder that EVERYTHING we do, and say, has an energetic imprint.
A child at any age discovering who the truly are is a miracle. If we honoured this with every child from birth the world would feel far safer and look very different.
Coleen what you have shared really sets bare the fact that most babies are actually set upon from birth and rather than being free to be themselves, they are coerced into being something that has been set in motion by images and ideals, rather than simply being allowed to be themselves.
We have lost the way when we think that we must impose on children how to be in the world, when in truth it is many of us as adults who have disconnected from our own essence and innate wisdom.
If we have misconceptions and misunderstandings about who we are, if we have settled for boxed in definitions and stereotypical pictures of what our gender is here for, how will we raise a young child? It seems we are sentenced to impose on them the reduced version of us we think is true, to get them to join in too. But every new born who arrives in this world shows us we are wrong. Boys are delivered as precious and delicate as a rose, girls arrive powerful and strong – like a love bomb. It’s they who teach us the truth, not the other way around. They don’t need to sign up to our beliefs and ideals, just maintain the simplicity and wisdom they naturally came with. It’s down to us to return to this quality that’s true.
If we hold and cherish our young as the divine beings they actually are would they not grow up to bring so much more love, wisdom and intelligence back to our societies?
You have made a lot of great points to ponder. On reflection I would say that despite being welcomed and loved, few baby boys are born into a family where their essence is valued, as the lyrics of the song would suggest. I have lately realised in conversations how often we project into the future and impose our societal hopes and expectations. This already tells the baby boy, who people want/expect him to be and that his essence is not enough.
The words to this song are magical and reminds me that we can welcome ourselves and each other into this world with love no matter how old we are.
It will be amazing when we stop stereotyping and pigeon holing people and start celebrating the natural qualities of each gender and our particular expressions of these.
Every birth is a ginormous celebration of another fellow brother entering the world once more.
The words of this song allow for the appreciation of what a child brings in its own unique expression no matter what the gender is with no expectations or impositions, simply beautiful.
I love reading these words by Michael Benhayon as they speak to the child in every one of us, encouraging us to appreciate how precious we are.
What quality are we in when we meet another, are we bringing love or possibly comparison, jealousy, frustration if anger? Do we even consider how the quality we are in impacts the other person?
Do we need to be Soul-connected ourselves to truly welcome a Soul-connected being coming into the physical body in a way that confirms its absolute divinity? I say, absolutely Coleen and this comes from our livingness and choosing to live in a way that supports us to be all of us in life.
“Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves?” Absolutely does, our quality of our livingness will definitely affect the quality of our welcome for our newborns.
Yes and for every child that is welcomed this way we start the turn of the tide and the re-writing of history.
It is super interesting and important to flag up the habits we slip into without thinking when we welcome a baby into the world. And the gender stereotyping does kick in instantly. So, whilst honouring the natural qualities of a girl or a boy we need to be very careful that we are not imposing and overlaying societal expectations that interfere with these.
What an amazing beautiful welcome into the world you share here Coleen so beautifully valueing who we are and the delicacy and beauty of every chid born and honoured this way. What we try and put onto babies children and ourselves in life currently is so loaded and full of impositions seeing a true way is very lovey to feel and will have a huge impact on humanity for the future.
We place expectations on babies often before they’re born. I wonder how many people even realising they’re doing it. We’ve done our best not to, and as we soon will be welcoming our second, I’ll have another chance to do so.
It’s definitely time we looked at the deeper role of what is involved in parenting, is it just to raise a human being who can cook and clean and will be successful career wise, or is it to raise a human being to know exactly who they are and how amazing they are, and to nurture them to grow and learn and never stop exploring this?
We have a great responsibility to live the love that we are, so that we can live the love-full reflection of a child right back to them.
I love this Cherise – what an awesome expression and if we live this love and reflect this all around us all of the time – there will be many changes in the world.
“Does not every child, every baby boy, deserve to be welcomed in this way, honoured in the simplicity of all that he is? And is this the only gift he truly ever needs, confirmed and lived daily by all those around him?” what a great reminder to parents, family and all of society that its about how we live and connect with our kids (and each other) that is what really matters in life. I often forget this but the truth is exactly that.
I played Micheal Benhayon’s song Little Child of mine to a pregnant friend and her husband it was a deeply touching moment for us all as we could feel the love and power that her little one was to bring.
We often perceive gender as something which divides to two sexes but it is here clearly shown that it has also become something which divides us from ourselves.
A very beautiful blog Coleen about the divineness that the newborn baby comes into the world with and what it is we reflect to the baby , “Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves? ” great question. Each time Michael’s beautiful song is sung it brings tears to my eyes, divine love coming through.
“Do we need to be Soul-connected ourselves to truly welcome a Soul-connected being coming into the physical body in a way that confirms its absolute divinity?” I agree that to welcome a child in full honouring of their divinity we too need to be soul-connected, however I also feel a child can be the leader in the family and inspire us to deepen our relationship with ourselves, our Soul in which case we may not yet be fully soul-connected ourselves but are able to welcome the child with the fullness and Love we are living at that moment and with a willingness to evolve.
I saw so clearly reading this that when a child is literally first born, we are in awe of the miracle of life, but how quickly we allow that to fade.
Great point – I was, and still am, blown away. I mean it really is a miracle. Appreciating that allows no space to consider gender, colours, future professions, etc.
That’s so very true Sarah, it fades as we go into doing, what needs to be done, allowing self doubt into our ability to know what to do.
Beautiful Colleen and what a lovely thing it is to let a child be who they are and grow up un-imposed upon knowing they have divine gifts and qualities.
I hugged someone yesterday. He happened to be a man. What I could feel as I held him was the hardness and protection in his chest. I could feel his belief that he has to be tough. Underneath this I could feel the absolute desperation for love, and a real need for the hug that he was receiving. I was aware in that moment of his vulnerability, and how this had never been cherished or encouraged. He reveled in the tenderness of the hug, and I could feel that he did not want it to end. It’s tragic that boys are not honoured in their tenderness. They are left adrift and lost to themselves.
A child who is brought up without the impositions and expectations from others is one who is free to know the sound and warmth of their soul is what truly holds them in this life.
This is a very beautiful invitation, Vicky, one for us all to consider when we are meeting children of any age.
I am certainly fortunate to live where I am compared to other parts of the world to raise my children but this has never given me the right to not look at the quality of energy with which I was and am living my life. I have always known that having money was not the answer but it was not until I met Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine who supported me to question my life that I began to take responsibility and commit to it.