Recently I went on a trip to London which included a lot of traveling on the London Underground. Besides the difficulties of finding my way on the underground, with all the different directions and colours, I had an extra challenge which was my suitcase: although it was a small suitcase, I couldn’t carry it up or down the stairs due to a physical condition I was experiencing. I had no other choice other than to ask for help as I needed people to help me carry my suitcase up and down the stairways. In case you have never travelled on the London Underground… believe me there are a lot of stairs. I decided to make it simple – every first man I saw, I would ask for help.
It was beautiful that every time I needed someone to help me, there was a man passing by who was very willing to carry my suitcase up or down the stairs.
Then on my way back at the end of the day when it was darker and I was feeling tired after an intense but very beautiful day, I was standing with my suitcase needing to get downstairs to my platform but there was nobody around to help me. I was waiting patiently but nobody showed up. Then after about 5 or 10 minutes standing there alone (which didn’t feel so comfortable) some people came from behind, not just one, but eight men of African origin, all walking in a way that appeared very macho and aggressive and, to me, they felt like a gang. None of them seemed to have any plan to start smiling and, by all appearances, they looked like tough guys.
“Wow” was what came up… I felt some tension rising up in me! I heard myself saying to myself; “You will do what you did all day, you will ask the first man you meet for support. You won’t avoid this gang now; they are your fellow brothers. It is like discrimination not to ask. You will not play this game; you will ask one of these men for support. You won’t go into fear and you will stay very present and just be you.”
In the front of the gang walking up the steps was what appeared to be gang leader. He looked the most macho and for sure, it felt like he did not plan to smile. All the others followed him. So I made the step and asked: “Sorry sir, can I ask you something? Can you bring my suitcase downstairs because…” and before I was able to finish, I felt aggression coming up towards me and there was an attitude that indicated he wouldn’t do that for me because that was not cool, especially in front of the other gang members. He started to shake his head with a “No” and I felt the gang coming closer and there I stood… I felt I was about to go into contraction from fear, but I chose to stay with me.
Suddenly something beautiful happened. I could clearly feel that this man was simply reacting from a carried hurt, a hurt that as a humanity we are all responsible for. The hurt of the discriminations of the past. I saw and felt the image of slavery, how he was thinking that I, as a white woman, thought that it was normal to ask a black man to carry her stuff. As if he was less.
I felt the part I, and everyone else had played, when the unexpressed truth of what we did as a collective – by not speaking out and condemning slavery – and how that has hurt our brothers and ourselves equally so. I felt very touched feeling all of this, accepting that this is what we have all created and understanding that it will take all of us to heal this hurt. All this awareness happened in a few seconds.
And from that awareness I looked at him and said “It is because I cannot carry the suitcase easily with my physical limitation, so it would be great if you can support me here with my suitcase.”
I could feel the aggression in his body melting away; not because of what I was saying, but from the true place I was saying it from. There was this inner feeling of deep respect for this man. I had truly connected with him and the beauty that he naturally is. I felt very humbled and I felt only deep love for all these beautiful men, and I could feel how this particular man kind of ‘radar scanned’ me on the energetic quality I was coming with. I could feel that he was touched by the fact that I had no reaction towards his imposing aggression towards me. He could feel my equalness and non-judgment. For me it was just about connecting and opening my heart wide. In a second his behaviour totally changed.
He looked at me, nodded his head confirming he would do it: no words were needed, the nodding of his head while looking straight at me was so beautiful, all was in his eyes – the trust, the understanding, the connection, the commitment and by that the true support.
He suddenly felt like my best friend who would do anything for me. He carried my suitcase down, and the others followed close. You could clearly see that they were impressed that he had changed his mind. Coming down he just gave me the suitcase, no words, but Wow there was no need for words… ALL was ‘said’.
I have learned so much from Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. I have learnt that life is not all about me, my stories or my needs. That it is about truly starting to care for myself and others: to make life about everyone and not about fulfilling my needs… to feel the huge love and wisdom in me and to connect with the same essence in others. In doing so I have noticed I am reawakening a deeper understanding for myself and others. We all carry stories, we all carry hurts and we have created all of them. No one is more, or less, responsible.
No matter our skin color, religion, nationality or gender, we are all equal Sons of God re-turning to the love we all come from. It begins with holding ourselves in the love and care again for each other, and instead of judging, to be more understanding and loving towards ourselves, and others. When we start with expressing true love and acceptance of everyone we meet, then we can truly connect with them. Only then will we return to a true and harmonious way of being.
By SB
Further Reading:
Refugees
Seeking Connection and True Relationships
Accepting all of you
A deep connection between two people and the ripple effect for the others in the group.
‘We all carry stories, we all carry hurts and we have created all of them. No one is more, or less, responsible.’
This is what makes us equal in physicality and equal in our divineness as we all come from God .
This is amazing!! I love coming back to reading this. The power of love erases judgement, prejudice and brings us back to we’re all equal and why wouldn’t we support another because we can?
Yes, I love this blog, it touches me every time as you no doubt did with your love in this scenario.
Everything is felt before it is seen, heard or touched. Energetic communication flows faster than anything physical and we are great readers of it all. Awareness takes milliseconds to reveal the truth, all we have to do is observe but it’s easier said than done, many of us are conditioned from the moment we take our first breath into perceiving life in a certain way and this is what clouds our ability to understand our awareness. Anybody could have been offended by the aggressive response, but through understanding the energy underneath it all we are able to discern and respond accordingly.
This is such an incredibly inspiring example of what can happen when judgement is replaced by true love and acceptance. I can feel that by you holding yourself in the love that you are, everything else that was not love, dissolved, as there was no space for it. What a beautifully healing moment for everyone concerned and an inspiration for me as I take myself out into my day.
It is lovely how when we are open to the support of others it is often there, even if it is not in the way we thought it would come.
Magic happens when we connect to another in equalness.
“Suddenly something beautiful happened” A beautiful opportunity you offered to each one of those men that there is power in being sensitive with another, whoever they are.
And also, that healing is not something that needs to take place in a clinic or practice room but it can happen in mere seconds in any encounter and any place.
Absolutely and the more we open up to others the more we allow for healing to happen.
The games of betterment in our social status, colour or origins is what keeps us from getting to know what is truly on offer from us all. Seeing beyond the form and allowing the true essence to shine is a gift to us all in our daily interactions.
I love reading this blog. The idea of being alone on a platform at night with a group of men is not one most women would want to experience. Feeling and understanding where other people are at is such a gift to humanity and brings us back to oneness instead of us all going into our separate reactions and hurts.
A beautiful example of supporting another to not carry their burdens of hurt.
” We all carry stories, we all carry hurts and we have created all of them. No one is more, or less, responsible. ”
This is very true, challenge is to let go of the protection of the personal hurts, then the realisation of responsibility will drop in.
A wise beautiful woman named Sandra told me recently that ‘people love to support others’ and I had never really thought of it like that. I have always been there to support others but found it difficult to ask for myself – until that day that is.
It is amazing how much we know and feel in everyone around us. Often we feel and sense far more than we realise. When we give voice to what we truly feel from our body within our inner heart, that’s when things really start to change in human life!
Judgement is debilitating in relationships and also in possible relationships-to-be when we first meet someone – this might look like avoiding them or being a certain way with them/reserved because of the expectations we’ve attached to their image. The reality can be so different, but we can also inspire anyone with a high quality of care, listening and respect no matter what their background might be.
I love that you had committed to ask the first man you saw in every situation and you were presented with all sorts of situations that challenged any ideals or beliefs about what that would look like. We are, as you say, all the same, yet we often wear our hurts and scars on our sleeve which creates an outside shell of protection. Time to change the scars for hearts and give life, love and each other another opportunity by being that change ourselves, lovingly and consistently.
I will be travelling in a few days and will need assistance with a small suitcase as I have a recovering frozen shoulder on my left side and a new tennis elbow on my right side. I have asked for assistance before when travelling with my frozen shoulder, but this takes it to a whole new level. Letting go of my independence and letting people see quite how fragile and delicate I am.
Supporting one another, whether we are friends, family or strangers is a part of us all living together on this planet, regardless of race, religion or culture.
I really love this sharing as I can feel that I often change myself based on how I ‘think’ others will receive me and through this I often harden my body and I can feel that this then communicates a rejection to others when in truth I am scared of rejection but that is then what I project and do to others.
We can all feel when someone is holding us as an equal or not and we have a choice to react to this and add more injury to the wounds we all carry, or we can choose to respond with love and bring a greater understanding and equality to every relationship we are in.
Yes Andrew, we can be the change we want to see and not wait for others to be that first.
A simple smile makes a world of difference in the day when we feel the levels of protection we can all walk around with. I have often found that this simple gesture can make mine and someone’s day.
By understanding that we all carry past hurts into the present it helps us to not take things so personally when people react around us.
The power of love when we are open to it has the power to transcend all that is not of love, creating space for more of what is true to be brought forth.
Beautifully shared Carola, the exact words I needed to read today!
Beautifull. When we let go of judgement, fear, protection, assumption, expectations and stay true to ourselves with a willingness to be open and truly connect with another love is instantly there as it always is.
The beauty of true connection – no words needed.
It’s really beautiful how sometimes we see ourselves in difficult situations in which we need people’s support, and how much can happen in those encounters when we open ourselves to them. By holding others in the same love that we hold for ourselves, miracles like this become the most healing and natural things in our everyday life.
Wow what a day you had , its amazing what you brought to theses men , equal-ness of the love that ye both are just lovely.
Connection builds the bridge across any so-called division or cultural separation, and through this connection we do feel that we are indeed all one.
“I have learned so much from Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. I have learnt that life is not all about me, my stories or my needs”
For me, there is a paradox here – as in one way you did make it about you, because you needed to honour you and what your body was sharing, but in that interaction, it comes not about you anymore because of the universality that we are all connected and can feel much more that we currently think. And when we do that, it is not about us anymore, but we think universally, with us all as equals.
What a beautiful account of how if we truly connect with people without judgement or pictures of how someone should be because of how they look, we can really make a difference, no matter how small or brief the interaction.
With all the fear that can be created around the underground it is so important to remain aware of the fact that it is used by human beings just like us. Huge crowds can take on an identity of their own which can feel threatening. Often people do not speak on the underground which can feel so unwelcoming. It’s easy to be in fear out of reaction. I feel it’s important for us to remain connected to our own human nature and not cut off like many people do. From experience when I do this I often have exchanges with strangers that are open. The openness needs to come from ourselves first and foremost, otherwise we are not available to receive anything that comes our way, and we simply contribute to the hostility and fear.
The key word here is trust. Trusting our selves enough in order to trust another. A great lesson to share with the world, as this is by far what stops us from opening up and being truthful. When we offer this level of openness it can be embraced with love or reaction. Either way the truth is on offer and that is the difference that is not being felt in the world today. Thank you for writing an inspiring message for others to learn from.
A beautiful blog to come back to showing us what truly can happen when we hold to what we feel is true and not back down.
This blog shows us the power of love and how so much is communicated energetically with out any words needing to be expressed.
I love this sharing, it is so humbling yet full of love, appreciation, acceptance and understanding for us all equally.
The only thing that interferes with this is thoughts that would have us believe we are less or more than another human being.
This is so confirming of the love we all are and it’s always gorgeous to read if ever I go into my own hurts and protection. I totally agree and get the ‘understanding that it will take all of us to heal this hurt.’ There are so many hurts in this world and it’s going to take us all to work together to heal them. Beautiful. Thank you so much for not falling into protection to be able to share your experience. It so inspires me.
This blog offers a clear example that discrimination is not only expressed in the obviously negative and abusive things said or done to another, it is equally expressed in all the subtle thoughts, emotions, looks, judgements and body movements. These are things we don’t often associate with the expression of discrimination but in truth all discrimination which is in fact separation from another, is expressed first through these things.
This wonderful story confirms how deeply we all feel everything and how it is always about energy first. The young man was able to feel and respond to your true intentions and that would have been a great healing for him. It is very giving and humbling to learn to receive.
When we express true love it is amazing who may respond and how they respond. A few people can go into reaction but it is quite rare. Most people respond immediately and that is very joyful.
The judgements we have are so often driven by our own fears and hurts and your story is a great example of putting to one side those feelings and being you.
It’s lovely to re-read this story, especially as these men were probably not used to feeling that level of openness from anyone, and it just goes to show that no matter how hard we present ourselves this can always be broken down with true love.
Each time I read this, I am moved to tears. The scars of how humans can be with each other run deep but can be healed quite simply and steadfastly. This blog is a stunning testament to this.
This is the best real life example of what happens when we drop all the ideals and beliefs we’ve carried around for eons and simply just allow ourselves to be who we are and accept others for who they are. I absolutely love this story.
This is the inspiration to never dismiss the offerings in our every interaction. Thank you.
Yes this is a great reminder that our every thought can either heal or harm.
It’s a great moment when I realise that I’m responsible for the quality of my thoughts.
I had a minor accident in my car today and it was amazing how caring the people in the other car and myself were during the whole episode. We were so much more concerned about how we were feeling , if we had support etc than the damage to the cars and there was no blaming at all just an honest sharing of what had occurred. We did swap phone numbers and chatted for a while but this was so unlike accidents I remember from before when there was finger pointing and sometimes aggression.
In love no words need to be said, it’s often our own need for recognition that requires words to be said.
The power of love. We are all equal and we all crave love and connection, a beautiful and powerful sharing.
No words were needed in this instance of a blessing for all in the way that you held all involved. “No matter our skin color, religion, nationality or gender, we are all equal Sons of God re-turning to the love we all come from”
This article speaks volumes. If we are open love is found, felt and experienced everywhere.
This is a beautiful example of how we all have the capacity to be love because we are love. It is always a choice whether we let ourselves be the love that we are or not.
When we meet people first with love and a strong knowing that they are also love, they can not but help to melt.
Everyday I feel how people are craving to be truly met. And when they are the truth and beauty of who they are is received.
Exploring our prejudices, being really honest about them – all of them – is a responsibility we simply have to take if we are going to break through increasing patterns of segregation and fear based marginalisation of groups of people categorised by any number of labels: skin colour, hoody wearer, age, weight…
I love public transport for its opportunity to connect to people – it can be all too easy to put in headphones and focus on our phones, but when we do choose to connect to someone, a smile, offering directions or helping with someone’s bag, we make a step in the direction of being more connected rather than disconnected.
I can see how horribly wrong this situation could have gone so it’s a good thing love is found in all of us, just sometimes you have to dig for it.
I am noticing everyday how much people love connecting with me and me with them. It is such a natural exchange and one that recognises our common humanity. Since I have made a deeper connection with myself, I see that same depth in another. These young men felt that too, every one of them!!
Living in London I have experienced many moments of kindness and love on the underground. Often when I need help it appears out of nowhere. It’s important to remember to be open to this possibility instead of assuming that everyone is unhelpful and uncaring. We are then more likely to be supported by people around us purely because we are open.
This is so beautiful to read and feel the oneness we all share. When presented with such love, the love we are all a part of, all the prejudices, the histories, the hurts can fall away to reveal this love in its essence. I am so inspired to not let discrimination dictate but love impulse.
Being really honest with ourselves about where and how we discriminate is the only way to break the hold these thoughts have on us. I know I have wanted to pretend they don’t exist which in a way simply gives them more power. There is something very powerful about open disclosure even quietly with ourselves.
I think its really lovely to read that you actively asked people to help you with your bags! I had to get pregnant to start asking for help as I never did it in the past, and when I did start asking for help, I wondered why I had waited so long! The fact is we all know love – we all have had family or friends or loved ones – and yet we can treat each other as strangers until we have officially met. But in asking a stranger for help, it just melts that barrier we put up against each other. That’s beautiful. That’s humanity.
There is more here to share on the levels of beliefs we have about the “type of people” we should keep away from. I have often noted how there is an air of unspoken communication with cultural groups about being accepted. Have these groups been formed not from our skin colour, and features but our fear of accepting that everyone has the same opportunity to be open to living and being with reflections of true love that calls for responsibility in seeing beyond the exterior?
I just adore that in true connection, any hurts just melt away and people can be seen for who they innately are. A deeply healing experience and lesson in life.
I love reading this. It is such a strong and loving confirmation of the power of vulnerability, of being open, having no judgment, being transparent – in fact being ‘naked’. Beautiful.
If we look at each encounter as a relationship an exchange and observe our responsibility in these exchanges the day becomes so much more engaging. There is purpose in all that we do.
I was talking to someone about this yesterday and how often they encounter reactions and hostility from people simply because they are a tall young man with short hair who often wears a hoody and that these reactions morph when they hear that he is well-spoken… both of these reactions are steeped in prejudice and judgement.
When we hold others as equal they feel it, when we hold them in love they feel it too. This man felt your love and openness and remembered the love he was. Awesome to see how this simple science is the answer to many of the worlds problems.
I agree, there is so much more to life when we stop making all about us…”I have learnt that life is not all about me, my stories or my needs.” I enjoy my life deeply because I have stopped focusing on my issues and stories and started appreciating the bigger picture.
I agree, Samantha, my life becomes bigger and richer in correlation with how much I expand away from it just being about me and my lot.
Agreed Kevin there have been way too many times that I have reacted and pulled away from an opportunity to connect with people on the basis of pre-conceived ideas and falling for social stereotyping. I know, not only because of this article, but also because of the times that I haven’t done this, that all the times I did were missed opportunities to break down the barriers we invisibly put up between each other.
I have found that expressing myself honestly, clearly and without holding back what I have to say in both words and body language is the most direct way to convey the love within myself to another.
It is hurtful to hold back the deep love that we are, and when we do not hold that back, others have the opportunity to also choose to not hold that back for themselves and to another.
Yes, Adele, and this is one of the ways we can dissolve the prejudices we hold against one another.
Oh Ariana this is so beautiful and a far cry from the countless times I have struggled with a heavy bag banging against my shins, simply so that I didn’t appear weak in front of strangers! Madness!
I was talking to someone the other day about this blog when they were sharing a similar experience. What is great is how when we open up to other people generally they open up to us. We just have to be willing to take the 1st step. So much of my life I have played the waiting game – but that does not work! I know love and I know how to be love so it is my responsibility to be love and thus show others it is not only ok to be love but very possible to actually live a life based on love 1st and foremost.
A wonderful example of true love – no attachment, no judgement, no demands.
What an amazing example of both the prejudices and judgements we live with daily and then the incredible transformations that can occur when we simply open up honestly and respectfully to one another. How quickly the barriers fall.
There are so many physical differences that we can see in each other, in fact no two people are completely the same, which is actually a pretty amazing fact about life. And yet there is the tendency to use this fact as a way to separate ourselves from each other, to distinguish borders against what is acceptable human anatomy and what is not. When all the time our differences could just be a physical manifestation of the unique quality we all bring to this world, unique in how we express the one source that holds us all equally.
There is so much offered in your amazing and beautiful experience and every time I read this I am blown away by a few very simple words “but I chose to stay with me.” Simple yet incredibly powerful and have supported the healing of many many people just by your loving reflection and connecting to the essence of someone.
This article makes me aware that in the greatest atrocities of life lay the equal and opposite force and that the depth of love this holds is beyond comprehension.
Tears came to my eyes again this morning when I read your blog as I was reminded of how much love and understanding there is available to us at any given time should we choose to stay open and not react.
Despite everything on the surface between people underneath there is always a undying connection from which comes true communication. It is what is felt within which is more persuasive than words or actions – the memory of another way of living together in equality and harmony…brotherhood.
From the title “Finding True Love in the London Underground” one might be under the impression that this is a romantic story about finding one’s prince or princess or soulmate or some such. Great to discover that there is no emotional love touted and that this is a true story about how true love can be in every day situations anywhere we find ourselves.
This experience demonstrates that true love is about the connection between one another, its not limited to husband-wife but is the potential of the brotherhood connection between each and every person.
This very much shows how we are all equally the same in essence… we all naturally and innately know brotherhood and recognise truth, love and understanding when it is presented.
The art of surrendering opens so many possibilities.
There have been many times when I have hesitated and held back through making an assumption about some one else. I can feel how this has limited connection, I have not been open. I can feel how this is changing and I am opening up. It feels joyous to connect with people and for them to not just be friends and family that we have agreed to connect with, my experience of the world has changed, humanity is feeling like one big family, what a great way to walk in life.
I am reminded of a situation with a man I used to come into contact with regularly, who was always angry. When I first met him, I would contract every time he spoke to me and then something shifted, one day, I stayed very present and just met and spoke with him as the tender man I could feel below the anger and the hurt. He melted and from that day, all our interactions were so playful. I know that he felt met and not judged by me because I could feel who he was below the surface anger and deeper hurt.
It is our open heart that allows what is there to make it-self known and it is a closed heart that caps the expression of all around us. This is a beautiful article which reflects to us all that is possible and none of it needs to be complicated.
Thank you Syliva for the most inspiring, heart blog. As i was reading this my heart was melting and i was feeling such a deep joy. The joy of connecting with each other from our essence, from our hearts, from who we are. We carry so many hurts and often how we live and behave comes from protecting our hurts. Hurts of generations, historical hurts, personal hurts. Yet when we open up and meet from our hearts all of that is melted away instantly in that very moment. The power of connection, openness – Love with each other.
What an amazing constellation of people who were all ready for a healing… pure gold offered for everyone.
I love the love that can be found on the underground. A kind hand can appear from nowhere when you most need it. It proves that the natural kindness of human nature still shines through when help is needed.
‘It was beautiful that every time I needed someone to help me, there was a man passing by who was very willing to carry my suitcase up or down the stairs.’ We realise how beautiful people are, and can be, when we are willing to be fully open to them, and therefore meet the qualities that are within us all.
I remember how difficult and unknown it was asking for help when I started to realise that I had always carried loads that were far too heavy for me and had turned the whole thing into a virtue of some kind. Your particular situation here is very unique of course but what stands out for me from my experience is how truly willing people are to support another human being and how that brings out the best in all of us. Some wonderful and magical fleeting connections happen that way and I treasure them deeply. The whole experience cuts right through the dross and baggage that we carry, goes right through to our innermost core and tenderness.
Your experience shows how solid and strong love is, that it can off-set and deconstruct behaviour that is holding another in equal and opposite reaction to love. Just like a maths fraction equation, When that common denominator of love is recognised, it cancels out the variables that are surrounding, rendering only love to be standing.
I know there can slip in a subtle form of judgment of others if I am not aware of it in my daily life, where I meet someone and make an immediate almost reflex decision as to how open I am going to be with them based on how safe they are I guess. This measure of safety is based on all sorts of beliefs I have in my head around how someone should or should not be or look. One thing that has helped me stop doing this as much is looking into people’s eyes and really connecting with their essence and often I have been surprised at the beauty, tenderness and grace that I have felt and ‘seen’ in others which is far greater than any superficial judgements I may have initially had of them. This has allowed me to drop my own layers of protection and be more open to my fellow human beings with whom I share this planet with.
This is a beautiful example of how appearances can be deceiving and that if we stay steady within us we can change the world around us.
I found this story very touching. I know as a woman the tendency is to go into fear when you are around aggressive men. But this blog shows me the absolute power of respect and understanding. We all want to be seen as divine beings and the walls can melt so easily when we are.
’I have learned so much from Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. I have learnt that life is not all about me, my stories or my needs.’ Indeed, life is very different when we learn to see the bigger picture, and understand that whatever we contribute to the world, that ranging from sadness and anger to joy and harmony, it affects ourselves and everyone else equally.
This is such a beautiful reflection of how we bring all our past hurts with us in each moment and interaction and that unless we remain aware can colour our reactions or responses.
It was lovely to read this blog as I often find myself not being open to receiving support. I recently flew and found the same thing – stairs everywhere! Although I could lift my suitcase, I found it started to feel too heavy especially for one side of my body. I had connected with a lovely man sitting next to me. As we were leaving the plane, I vaguely heard him ask if I was ok with my suitcase, but ignored it. The second time he asked I said yes to his offer and it felt great, to let him be the caring man he is and for me to be cared for and not feel I have to ‘do it all alone’.
How Beautiful Syliva, you stayed open,no contraction or reaction just creating the space for the other to feel the true openness and connection. In that moment you shifted mountains and allowed for deep level of healing to take place, without any words being exchanged.
It is amazing how we can be so quick to judge with our eyes yet when we open up to theirs and give them the chance they are more than likely to do the same. The question is are we willing to be fully open with everyone else, or are we going to continue to wait for everyone else to open up 1st?
Choosing connection to you, allowing your heart to open wide and feel the true essence of the person in front of you is an amazing experience. What it is revealing for me is how often in my life have I played it safe to such an extent that I avoid situations. If I cross the street to avoid someone that would be hurting them because I’ve shut my heart in judgment. – ouch for us all.
It’s amazing how we have a learnt reaction to change how we are toward other people because of our perceptions toward them in defense. If we are all doing this surely those who choose not to can start an opposite chain reaction of remaining open and removing the perceived need for a defense or protection from others.
‘We all carry stories, we all carry hurts and we have created all of them. No one is more, or less, responsible.’ What an absolute truth you have stated here, and one I have chosen to be ignorant to time and time again. Do we really want to feel that responsibility we hold in the dilemma of others?
It was inspiring to read how you held yourself in such circumstances and the connection you felt as a result of holding this man in the same love and respect you would hold any other Son of God.
Beautiful example of how when we open in truth and love, no messing, we are more often than not met with the same. I have been in similar potentially threatening situations and by being very real the potential danger has not come to fruition because of the steadiness in truth and love that I have held in that situation.
Truly understanding someone and feeling what is coming up for them is one of the most loving things we can offer another and to ourselves. And in my experience, not taking things personally, as when we do it is like building a wall in front of the person.
Allowing ourselves to be supported makes all the difference in the world. Instantly, support is there and we may then realise that it was us who stood in the way of true support coming our way in the first place.
I love this blog – we are all equal in essence. Makes me think about how different the world would be if we based our relationships with, and parenting of our children on consistently connecting to their essence without imposing our ideals and beliefs upon them. I wonder if there would no longer be the need for violent gangs.
“They are your fellow brothers”, so clearly and truthfully expressed. More and more I feel how this is actually the truth. Not from my head anymore, but from lived experience. We are all equal and all our essences can be felt and can never be destroyed, no matter how far we’ve distracted ourselves from our essence, one day we’ll all return. How beautiful is it for a person to be met by a complete ‘stranger’. No one is a ‘stranger’, a strange word actually. We might not have met this person in daily life, but it is definitely a fellow brother or sister on his or her way back to herself.
We all crave to be truly met for who we are and not for our apprearances, which for most people is just a thick layer of protection for never having been truly seen or met in the past.
There is so much to say for staying open and not letting our hurts be more than our potential. What a gorgeous story – we’re all equal and to live like this is very healing to how we have treated and still treat each other.
To truly connect is the best medicine ever as a true connection is something most of us are dearly missing.
True courage and power right there at the top of the staircase. Not to manipulate or force, but to allow vulnerability, open up, see, feel, understand and appreciate another son of God all in the twinkling of an eye.
This has really got me considering the times I’ve not asked someone for help because I’ve assumed they’d be unwilling to for whatever reason; and actually just by asking them fully feeling the equalness of us all communicates this and gives them an opportunity to confirm the care we all share for one another. I’m inspired to not let my fears and prejudices get in the way of how I am with others.
Fear is something that has a huge impact on our lives. Had you stayed in the moment of fear all of this would have passed you and this man by.
Appealing to the innate connection we have with each other as human beings provides the opportunity for that connection to be opened and felt anew.
When we hold steady with ourselves the reflection we give to others, whether directly or indirectly is huge.
Choosing understanding over reaction towards life, or others is deeply healing for all involved in any situation.
Wow well I wasn’t expecting that, but your story brought tears to my eyes. What an amazing story and a loving experience. It goes to show that when we put our ‘this is who I am’ external shell aside, we are all equal, loving brothers and sisters. No matter how we’ve lived or live, who we are or what we do, we can still connect to that love within. Thank you for sharing this beautiful story.
As I said before I love this story, we need much more of these as this is our natural way, love is our natural way. The other week I was doing some research on Islamaphobia and was shocked when the top searches on Utube where people being straight out racist. I could not believe these videos had received so many likes, this is not our natural way, to say such harmful things and promote hate like this on a media outlet is pure irresponsibility and highlights a responsibility we all have to say ‘no’ to this type of abuse.
There can be a lot of chatter in my head – talking to all sorts of people, and negative chat with myself. I’m finding talking to myself can be supportive – supporting me to be tender with myself, feel my own quality and confirm what I’m feeling.
I love what you say here Zofia. We are here to evolve each other. Sometimes I can think that I need to evolve everyone – that’s rubbish and quite arrogant really – we are here to evolve each other as you say.
I got shivers at the point where you described how you suddenly understood why this man was behaving in this way. The understanding that you both came to on an energetic level changed everything about your experience of each other and then well beyond too. Understanding behaviour is a huge part of my job as a teacher and there can be a lot of aggression coming our way. I am learning how to respond to behaviour rather than throw back the same aggression out of protection. I have lost my temper or spoken aggressively a few times this week out of protection and reading this has reminded me to stay present with myself and my body, and stay with knowing the essence which is far from the behaviours being shown.
Beautiful that you held your steadyness and allowed him to feel his equalness with you and everyone else, without the need for words.
I have also learnt there isn’t a perfection only many opportunities to re imprint with love again and again and again.
Discrimination (not allowing ourselves to feel that we are all equal brothers; hence not accepting others as equals) finds its way if we allow it. Who do we ask for help and who we avoid asking; who do we want/accept to meet and be met and who we avoid; who do we trust and who we do not, etc. These are all silent decisions but decisions we constantly make nonetheless.
Connecting with another truly and equally works miracles.
In meeting someone fully and without reservation we can offer the opportunity for them to also let go of their judgement and preconceptions recognising that we are in truth all the same.
The issue of race or racism either being on the receiving end of it, or the one condoning it, is about non-acceptance of oneself, because i know that when i started to accept myself and all the 7 nationalities i represent, my skin complexion and background, that the resulting feeling or sense of inferiority or superiority [that creates the separatist reality of racism], dissipated to make it or none of those ‘outer shells’ no longer ‘an issue’ by which to be identified and recognised by. Acceptance of oneself dissolves towards the acceptance of others seeing them in the same light as us. As equal brothers.
Great expression Liane – “…love wins, by virtue of the fact that it never fights.”
“It is like discrimination not to ask.” – This is such an insight and an important aspect for all of us to consider and take into our lives in our dealings with our fellow brothers …
So well expressed Esther and yes indeed – a whole history lesson and just in a few minutes of wordless communication – so awesome.
I especially connected to your last sentence – “When we start with expressing true love and acceptance of everyone we meet, then we can truly connect with them. Only then will we return to a true and harmonious way of being.” This is something we can practice on a daily basis no matter where we are or what situation we are in. It is a continuing learning process and the love that can be experienced by all is worth every step.
What an enormous healing for both you and the leader of the gang!.. This is one of those incidences which for years to come, will be remembered!
I have always found public transport fascinating – it is such a brilliant place to experience life in a microcosm
I love it too Rebecca, slices of life one after the other. There are so many opportunities to connect, simply through eye contact for example.
If we only experience a moment of being seen and accepted for who we are we get to know that it is possible and not a futile wish. Being seen is what cuts through the giving-upness most people have given in to. Once we know it is possible it is only a matter of time before we choose to heal and restore who we are.
When we express in our full power and with love, then there is an open invitation for the walls of protection of another to come falling down. What we are left with is a sense of oneness, of togetherness, of brotherhood.
What I appreciate when reading this blog is how we are all willing to help and support each other – it comes very naturally and it it just takes one person to start this. It shows we all have the pull and knowingness that we’re all equal.
If I can hold myself in any situation, not going into reaction, magic happens! If can not let my stuff get in the way, everything is possible!
And is all about what choice that I make in any situation. That is the power that we hold!
We have the power to transform our lives and all of humanity.
Wow, that is responsibility! Let’s get on with it!
This just shows how much we are all feeling energy all the time.
It is amazing what can happen when we trust and take a step with no investment in the outcome, in this case it was asking a stranger to help carry a bag, it is these profound moments that contain so much beauty.
We are fed images of teenage gangs and associate them automatically with some horrific outcome. Some years ago after dark I returned to my car in a car park and saw there were teenagers hanging around. When I arrived at my car, they walked towards me and I felt anxious but what happened next amazed me. They said they had noticed that I’d left my lights on and offered to help me bump start the car. As it happened it was an automatic so they couldn’t and I had to call for help, but while I was waiting it enabled me to observe them in a completely different light.
Wow Carmel, truly gorgeous to hear, thanks.
It’s amazing what a moment of openness can do for another. It’s possible that with the group of men holding a macho, aggressive attitude they would be used to people shying away from them, keeping their distance. But in experiencing you not flinching, holding your space and staying open they would have a moment of something else entirely. Who knows what impact a moment like this can have in the support of others?
Yes I feel you are on to something here Janet. It is the staying open to connecting with another person’s essence and not being distracted or dominated by their behaviours or reactions or stories; that is the way to heal all our relationships.
Yes, what an opportunity to give and receive love.
I loved reading this blog it is so inspiring demonstrating the power of being vulnerable. I love the instant understanding you had of this mans first reaction, but were able to remain connected and not contract which then he could feel and so dropped his guard and from that the true connection felt between you both. What a wonderful healing for you both and what a great reflection for the other men to witness.
Very impressing and inspiring example of being unconditional and letting go of any pictures that otherwise impose upon people – that allows a space for just being who you are and that is enough, to be seen and accepted for who we are in essence beyond the layers of protection and pretense.
How differently we would experience the world if we understood the energetic fact that everything is a reflection, and if you don’t like what you see or feel , it’s time to look at the source and ask why is this being reflected to me and what’s my part. Everything is there to teach us as life is one big lesson and there are no accidents, only lessons to be learnt and fully appreciated for the opportunity to expand.
This blog goes to show just how open people actually are to supporting others and going out of their way to make sure other people are looked after.
The commitment to love and equality are palpable. Absolutely beautiful and inspirational to read. What if mankind – all of us – would treat each other with the same level of respect and love as here is being shared? What if… Could it be that we could live together in a one unified way where we there’s no need anymore for slavery, unequality, racism, bullying etc? And what if we’re all responsible for making the choices and commitment to be able to feel our hearts once again and from there truly start loving others.
First thing that came to my mind was “don’t they have elevators?” that would make it so much easier… but I realised later that that would be just a solution not an answer to the state we are in as humanity. We are so easily going for a fix, a way to not having to connect to other people and avoid issues feeling like we moved on, but actually not truly moving on and healing these ways we have been with each other as you did so super beautifully by connecting to yourself and others.
Syliva this is a sharing of love that re-imprints history and clears the way for evolution and harmony amongst us all, thank you for leading the way.
There is much talk in the world about how we are now all so insular and selfish and don’t live in communities or look out for each other etc..etc… All of which is true. But I travel on the Tube a great deal and see this kind of stuff happening all of time. People giving up their seats, helping Mums with prams, supporting people with their suitcases and helping people navigate the maze that is the London Underground. So, no matter what is going on on a global scale, there are loads and loads of people who are still connecting to their innate caring and tender being and are super willing and open to really looking out for others. Amongst the carnage that humanity can so often appear to be in, it is very heartening to see these frequent displays of love. It is who we are.
It is a blessing for all of us men to have women openly express their fragility to us and for us to openly welcome it and support it. Gosh the world needs more of this. We are all fighting in so much protection, yet crying out to have these kinds if inter-actions. It would have been seismic for the man who carried your suitcase – and all of his friends.
I remember years ago a friend travelling around the world on her own with a great big back pack that she didn’t carry once. At the time I thought this was an outrage and ridiculous but now I recognise that she was able to accept help from others that she was completely comfortable with her fragility as a woman. It’s very cool how we can change completely if we allow ourselves to consider there is another way to live without the fight and struggle.
Wherever we may find ourselves true Love is always present whenever we are connected to who we are in essence.
This sharing makes you realise how much we all judge each other on external features and the personal reactions we carry. The great lesson in your sharing is that if we all went beyond this all of the time- there would be no issues between races, religions, nationalities or between any people.
This is a blog I will share and share with all. I see its potential to inspire others on Equality and Diversity courses I present. This scenario, or similar, could be used to explore perceptions and split moment choices we make. It offers a wonderful opportunity for reflective group work by inviting people to share what they would do in a similar situation and why.
Your experience shows that meeting someone in love and understanding, no matter the outer projection, can melt a relationship back to a mutual and very natural connection.
Awesome that you saw beyond the superficial image that this guy portrayed as a barrier to keep people out, such a blessing for both of you and everyone who witnessed it. Thank you for sharing.
…and it got me thinking how amazing the man would have felt as he walked away. The warmth of love melting away that cold exterior even for a few fleeting moments. And for those in his group who witnessed it – to see one of their crew helping out someone. Surely an inspirational moment for them all.
What a journey of feeling the fear, not contracting and holding yourself and another in love and equalness, simply inspirational.
Yes, gong into fear and contraction would have only reinforced who the guy/group thought they were, not who he/they truly are.
I have often loved the small moments of connection that you get when asking someone to help you with your bag, or as I have discovered, the sweet surprise when you offer to help someone with their pushchair or when you can see that they are lost. All to often we pass these opportunities to connect by.
Yes! I love walking up to lost tourists in London turning their map in all different directions. I often think to myself ‘what if I was in their shoes?’ – how cool would it be if some local could point me in the right direction. An opportunity to interact, to connect.
Well said, Esther. There is so much we can learn every day just by observing and connecting, so everyone we meet is a teacher.
When we are in our livingness, the world opens up around us. The ripples of these simple acts has a domino effect of spreading love.
In that moment, on that day something fundamental shifted in that man and all those men as they were met with your steady love holding them as equals.
Love works, because love is simple. The moment we try and complicate it we know it is not love.
Thank you for sharing where love can take us when we choose to stay connected with ourselves.
I find it particularly remarkable that you were able to walk down the stairs without expressing emotions. Wouldn’t this have been the most typical situation to become scared, frustrated, angry or sad? Not going into emotions opened the door for love to be expressed.
This is a beautiful example of how true love disarms and deconstructs the walls of protection and guard. True love – not the romantic version, but the quality of harmlessness, honesty and oneness in expression, brings about connection within and with one another.
The support to carry your case was for me a bit like a microcosm of what happens in a disaster, where people pull together and show what I feel are their true colours. Compassion, care and love. The question is why it takes someone in need of support or being vulnerable for us to express love towards one another, why is this not our normal everyday.
It’s not just esoteric people who read people, Street people read everyone who passes. If they see you are afraid, they know you have pre judged them to be dangerous. You are insulting them. It’s much better to make friends with them.
It’s funny how simple this interaction was when a connection was made. This really is as profound as it gets, because in another circumstance, if the person asking for help was in complete and utter fear of the men, it would have been a very different outcome, after all, is it possible that the gangs continue to multiply because of the fear and judgment generated from them?
This is awesome and deeply inspiring. Had you not asked this man and contracted in fear, he would not have got the opportunity to consider his hurts were not universal and feel it is connection that is universal.
I love all that there is and can be felt in even the most simple exchange. To allow yourself to feel this and not react to what is felt, allows true magic to unfold between people.
This is such a beautiful blog.
When a person is holding hurt, aggression or hardness and they let it all melt away when you offer them love and equality, it is a beautiful thing. In my experience, when the protective shield is down, these people that appear mean or tough are often the most sincere and deeply caring people you will meet. I had a customer once, this old lady that was very rude and complained about everything when she visited my cafe, she was angry and the best challenge I had seen in a while. When I met her with absolute love and touched her with the deepest care, with zero reaction to the fuss she was making, she melted like ice on a summers day.
This is an awesome story of how things can happen when we don’t judge and how people will be with us when we let them in and knock down all the walls of protection.
Wow- what an amazing, inspiring story and turnaround for the man, only possible because you held him in such deep love as an equal, and was given the awareness of where he was coming from – deep past hurts. You showed deep trust, and true love for your fellow brother, no matter what colour, race or nationality
What a beautiful example of the power of reading the situation in full and taking energy into account. We can offer so much healing to all we encounter just by staying with ourselves and truly seeing what is at play and not just what we can physically see. There is always so much more going on then meets the eye!
The eyes of a person share so much, there is so much light that shines. The more I see past the outer garments, habits and choices, the more I see the equality, divinity and love, we all share.
I agree, Samantha. The eyes don’t lie.
I travel on the plane a bit, a short flight into London. I have found it very interesting to observe who I get to sit next to and share with. Some times, it flows and the person wants to talk all the way to London, other times there is stuff that either I have made assumptions about or they feel that means we hold back. I have one example when this happened, but when I did venture a “how are you going…” and talked about our destination, I could feel the mutual shared connection and it felt amazing. Holding back is protection, nothing more, the more I am willing to be open and connected with other’s the more this is reflected in my life. Awesome to feel.
Absolutely, everyone in that encounter connected with the oneness of life. Profound to share in and read.
When we speak from love it dismantles the barriers we otherwise put in place to not feel the truth of who we all are.
Yes it is true that we all have hurts that we carry, but it is also true that we are not our hurts, we are so much more. It is our choice as to whether we are willing to heal and let go of our hurts, our choice as to the degree of Love that we choose to live for ourselves though which the foundation of all our relationships are laid. Do we live from the reaction, protection and limitations our hurts or from the openness, acceptance, understanding and appreciation of the Love we all equally are?
It’s actually understandable that we approach life with such defence because of our own previous hurts or the generational hurt that we carry. But what is clear is that the way we have dealt with this does not and has never worked…i.e. meeting this with judgment, defence, criticism or blame. Meeting someone with openness and an understanding is really the only way to show that there is another way to be together.
You have offered us all a very simple and clear example of what it means to let someone in with no judgement or critique, to truly let them feel seen and met with understanding.. What power!
It is a delight to see how help is freely offered on the underground when people have suitcases or buggies. I used to think I was being independent by not asking for help, but now I would not think twice about it. We dont have to do it all on our own, and I enjoy the support I get in allowing others to help me.
And at minimum it is an interaction, a connection with another. It doesn’t take long to realise that interactions and communications are few and far between in the tube. We all love to connect, but dare not on the tube. May I help you with your bag?
I have loved my experiences of having a heavy suit case on the London underground, both for showing me my own unwillingness at times to ask for help, but also the support that is readily available if we choose to ask.
This is brilliant – and as you share here – if we are able to ask for support without any hurt or reaction – then we clear the stigma of all keeping to ourselves and keeping closed and separate.
Yes so amazing. And how great that you let yourself feel all that was playing out in the moment it was playing out as you held the others in equalness and love.
I love the beautiful reflection here that when we choose to remain loving and open, and when we do not buy into our own or anyone else’s reactions but instead simply observe it, there is an inner wisdom that supports us to deepen our understanding. And what a perfect example that when we expand that understanding within ourself, and deepen the love and appreciation we hold the other person in, that they actually feel this and it supports them to also deal with their own inner issues.
totally inspired by this blog. Its amazing what can happen when we don’t react and think people will hurt us, the ‘protective radar’ can simply melt away, and it is coming from this openness that humanity so desperately needs, with friendships, work relationships and all relationships.
What a confirmation of the opportunities that are always there when we don’t go into judgement and remain connected to our innermost. A powerful learning and deep healing for both you and the ‘gang leader’.
Awesome sharing Silvia. Feeling the absolute beauty, openess and connection that occurred in that moment brought tears to my eyes.
How gorgeous it is to be reminded that we can melt even another if we simply connect to who they really are. I had a similar experience on a tram recently when an older, aggressive looking man stared intensively at me at close range for an extended period of time. In the past I would have reacted and shut down or gone into anger and defence but this time I allowed myself to feel that this man had clocked my true beauty. I clocked his true beauty when I did this and when I smiled at him with an open heart and he tenderly smiled back with no imposition. When I left the tram this man wished me a wonderful day with a warm and open heart. It was astoundingly beautiful.
There is so much to learn from in this blog, of no doubt I will learn more about each part as I re-read this. For today what really stood out was that when you respected yourself first people were more willing to help. Whereas if it comes from a ‘you do this for me’ that comes from first disrespecting ourselves and then others feel disresepected and unloved, thus the hurt and reaction. Theres nothing wrong with asking for help I am learning but it feels like to me that if we don’t help ourselves first that help does not come from love but need and it prevents others from lovingly supporting. I have struggled with lifting heavy things at work but if I try to lift them myself I get hurt. And if I let things get too heavy and just ask another to do it that also hurts them and me. But when I care for myself I am more aware of when something may be getting too heavy and ask them to help sooner rather than later and/or do the work tasks I know are within my capability.
It would be easy to feel intimidated by a gang of men on the underground and many would have just let them pass, but so much more was offered here by you refusing to engage with the aggressive energy they were protecting themselves with.
An amazing example of how we treat people COUNTS, and the way we are with other people in every moment and every interaction not only matters but could potentially effect that person for the rest of their lives.
Wow, this is a beautiful example of the power of love and how love can heal all the hurts of the past in one second.
This article does so much to healing the gap in inequality and brings a level of understanding that is currently so desperately needed.
Communication is far more than the words we say to each other and this shows beautifully how the connection between us all in our hearts brings true understanding of each other.
Its super interesting how understanding can change a situation… knocking our reaction or our judgement of a situation and allowing a reading of what is really going on.
Being vulnerable is so powerful.
This is a very humbling blog and a testimonial for the power each of us carries when we truly connect. The healing is felt right through my bones and through the veils of time.
This is a powerful example of the fact that we are all one and the same and in essence deeply sensitive, tender and caring people underneath that protective wall we have build to protect ourselves from being hurt. When we are able to let our guard go down, we also give that same possibility to the other, and that is the beauty and power we can bring to the world in living that love that lives in us all equally so.
I just love stories like this.
The underlying discrimination of treating people differently at all is very well represented and the repercussion that they present.
So true Luke. How many layers of hurts, reaction, protection are built on top of one another because of such insideous forms of discrimination? And how easily were they dismissed through a moment of honesty, realisation and true connection reflected in this blog.
What an amazing healing this man would have received from you through the way that you treated him as an equal, and let yourself understand the reason for his aggressive behaviour. Beautiful.
That is an amazing story of how true love, courage and decency ignited the same in a fellow human being so that this man could grow much bigger than his accumulated hurts and meet you as fellow human being; and even more special because it happened in front of his followers.
Beautifully said Gabriele.
So true and great points made here Gabriele – especially – ” because it happened in front of his followers.”
A timely reminder in the current state of our world and the levels of racial hatred. An opportunity to look past the deep hurts that we all carry and seeing another for their truth worth which is equal in us all.
I agree Gabriele Conrad. In this precise moment, all present were given an opportunity to heal a hurt that they carried of the world and all their reactions as a result of this. It would be interesting to know the ripple effects of this sharing with others.
A great sharing. I love that sometimes no words are necessary… when we hold people as equal in the love we both are, they cannot but feel it and respond in kind.
Communication without actually verbally communicating.
I agree Samantha Westall. I had this experience today at the hair salon. I sat opposite an elderly Vietnamese woman who spoke no English and seemed quite closed off from the staff and other clients. I took the time to smile, wink and even share a grin and before long she began talking to me -all from holding another in equalness. It was truly a memorable experience for us both.
There is absolutely no distinction between human beings – we are all equal regardless of race, colour or ability and when we remove a hurt, facade or indeed the outer skin layer – we are all the same. It becomes so apparently clear that the role we may play, the culture we may be born into, the hurts that we may carry, have all been brought to us and are not in our essence who we are – they are a far cry from the Divinity we each are.
A deep commitment to our own love for ourselves is first necessary to be able at times like this to reach out and connect to that same love in others. It is then that ‘magic happens’.