My Dad has always been a handyman, one of those guys who had no formal qualifications but was able to look at what needed fixing and before long, it was completed. His support was always offered when jobs needed to be done around the house, or when I was a child he would build toys and cubby houses from scratch for my siblings and me to enjoy.
I recently asked him for some support with a project that was being set up with the local park community. They were asking residents to help build a new nature playground and for volunteers to construct a small table and a sorting box for the play space amongst the bushes. I approached my Dad and asked if he was interested as he loved to work with wood, and his backyard was a permanent display of benches and picnic tables he had built over the years.
Over the next 3 days I had the privilege of working and standing in deep appreciation of this man and his relationship with wood and the craftsmanship of carpentry.
Day One: Preparation Stage
My Dad waited patiently for the materials to be dropped off at his home from the local hardware store. When I arrived he had already placed all of his working materials meticulously on the bench: an assortment of cutters and tools that he had used regularly and that he knew would support him to design and build these pieces. He checked that he had easy access to the area and that there was plenty of workspace for him to move around as he manipulated the materials.
I sat with my Dad and discussed the design, asking him for support and possible options in ways we would start the process. I noticed that as I worked there was this inbuilt urgency to get it up and running as my Dad continued to ponder on the measurements, sizing up and spending time feeling the wood and how it would react to the cutting processes.
I could feel a bit of agitation in my body. I was going into the ‘get it done’ mode and my Dad, in his clear and calm voice, repeated the words … “Just a minute.” Although I said nothing, I sat a bit annoyed with having to wait, not taking into consideration that my Dad was appreciating the moment and what was on offer for him to learn.
Our next stage was to begin measuring and marking the wood so that it could be cut into the correct sizes to be assembled. I went into auto pilot mode and started to measure at fast speed with a simple metal ruler. My Dad asked if I was checking the measurements from both sides, as he had noticed that the wood panels were slightly raised and that this fact could alter the accuracy. I wasn’t sure what he meant and replied, “…I think so.” Within minutes my Dad appeared with a tape measure and with a steady voice showed me the importance of taking your time and measuring both sides of the wood to achieve accuracy, as this was the difference, he said, between a balanced or lopsided table.
After stopping for a cuppa and a quick bite to eat, I presumed we would continue with the cutting and assembling process. My Dad replied… “That’s it for today. I need to sit and draw the measurements and we can start cutting tomorrow morning. This will give me time to check that all the blades are working and I have all the tools ready to go in the morning.” I stood a bit confused, slightly annoyed, as I had a plan in my head of having this finished within the day. I hesitated a bit and then agreed and headed home.
For the rest of the day this agitation stayed with me. I sat wondering why there was tension in my body and what was my investment in having to have these pieces completed quickly when there was no deadline. I knew that I had given the job to a person who would produce an incredible piece of woodwork for all who visited the park to enjoy, but the speed to complete the process was leaving me feeling uncomfortable.
The next morning I woke and read the following quote from a book by Serge Benhayon “If everything is energy, therefore, everything is BECAUSE of energy.” (Serge Benhayon, Esoteric Teachings & Revelations, p 220)
A big ouch moment was felt. I was driven by the energy of doing and my Dad stayed steady in the energy of being.
I could feel how the doing was running my body whilst my Dad stayed consistent with himself and did what was needed on that day, nothing more and nothing less. Being with himself was paramount, as this was the quality of energy the work would be completed in.
Day Two: Cutting Stage
I arrived early to begin the cutting stage. My Dad had already positioned all the wood panels on the large working bench and had his assortment of safety gear ready to go. I watched how he planned each move so that he was taking care of his body, whilst at the same time working with the heavy and loud machinery. He asked me to sand the pieces and encouraged me to wear a pair of safety glasses and gloves to avoid injury and any splinters.
I had noticed that on day two as I was coming to work on the project, I was starting to truly appreciate being with my Dad in the process. There was an ease in which the cutting stage was completed. Our communication was clear and each part of the process moved with clear precision and flow. The urgency that I felt the day before was gone, as I was now more aware of staying present with the moment, and stood back openly to hear my Dad’s suggestions on how to assemble the items we had worked together to build. We stopped again for a cuppa and a bite to eat and this time I noticed that I was not hungry and did not need to numb the feelings that I had the previous day. The agitation and push was not there and neither was the feeling to distract myself with food.
My Dad then mapped out the floor space in his work shed, placed all the pieces on the floor, like a large Lego construction site, and locked the shed door saying… “Tomorrow is the best part. That’s when it all comes together and you get to see your hard work.” It was humbling to hear my Dad appreciate and settle into the joy he would experience the next day. He was in no hurry to complete what he knew was a process that would be worth the wait.
Day Three: Assembling Stage
I unexpectedly arrived slightly later on the third day and thought my Dad would be up already assembling the play equipment. Surprisingly, he waited until I arrived and said… “Jobs like these are a two man job. You can’t beat the precision that comes from two people getting the job done.”
So together, like the foundation of the previous day, we assembled two amazing nature play pieces for our local park community with ease, precision and incredible accuracy.
I sat, extremely blessed to have shared in this moment with my Dad. I stopped to appreciate the incredible levels of patience and craftsmanship he had shown in moulding each piece of wood and the steady pace that he worked at to prevent errors, and how he honored himself in each step with rest and reflection.
My Dad was truly inspiring in his actions and was a great reflection that reminded me of the works of Serge Benhayon and the Ancient Wisdom, teaching us of the true power of working with an energetic quality that serves all.
The nature playground equipment now nestles amongst the trees in the local park that I pass each day. The way in which this was made – the care, dedication and precision of my Dad and his skills – is truly a blessing for each child that engages in its true purpose to play!
By Anonymous
Further Reading:
Washing my Car: a Lesson in Appreciation and Self-Care
‘The Joy of Ageing, Esoterically’
The fall of ‘quality’, the rise of a Quality
481 Comments
The combination of love and absolute attention to detail is very powerful.
We can learn so much from others, all we need to do is be open and willing to see Gods spark thats in all of us.
There are so many different expressions of divinity.
How beautiful to have experienced such a learning and sharing with your dad, perhaps a man with no formal qualifications but at master in living life, thank you for sharing this with us Anonymous it was a joy to read.
What a great sharing and you can truly see from generation to generation where things have become so instant that the respect, care and attention to detail has been lost in the way we are in life. The quality in which we go about life and what we do has an immediate effect on not only ourselves but all those around us.
A true craftsmen focuses not on the end product, but on the process that will eventually take him there.
This is then the quality that one receives both in the workmanship and energetic integrity.
I sincerely love this blog, reading the warmth of your Dad, his skill, your love for him and the learning you encountered through the process is gold… ‘A big ouch moment was felt. I was driven by the energy of doing and my Dad stayed steady in the energy of being.’ Re-learning to be in the quality of being, as we were as kids, can be a challenge when we have let the energy of doing take over. But your Dad is a beautiful reminder that not all adults have lost this art and have remained in touch with this steadiness.
So beautiful to read, the joy and steadiness of how your Dad worked with a quality of presence that reflected in a job well done, leaving an energetic quality for children to feel and enjoy.
When I feel a level of urgency to complete something I can often go into drive and in that quality what is done lacks the fullness of who we are.
My dad taught me how to drive a tractor… I still use these lessons in driving a car… Especially how to steer with your knees 🙂
The joy of honouring your body and working to a rhythm are so beautifully illustrated here, and I love how the author was guided with clear presentation and a lived way to seeing that it’s about quality and that always shows.
That is very true and to notice the sense of enjoyment or even joy.
I love this story and the unhurried way your dad approached the project, with no drive and no need to prove anything
If we built ‘our house’ on our innate qualities instead of the skills we aquire, we’d have a solid foundation for life. Too often we take for granted what’s seemless for us yet it’s that which is important and not the rest.
Anonymous, this is so interesting to read; ‘I could feel how the doing was running my body whilst my Dad stayed consistent with himself and did what was needed on that day, nothing more and nothing less. Being with himself was paramount, as this was the quality of energy the work would be completed in.’ I can feel that it is common for us to go into the doing and completing what we need to do as quickly as possible and that this can compromise the level of care and precision that goes into our work, it can also compromise us staying in our natural rythum and enjoying what we are doing.
If we allow others space for their own expression instead of imposing our own agenda or expectations on them we can be deeply inspired by the lived quality of them.
Everything has it’s own rhythm and cycle and our body is the master of it. So if we adhere to and honour our body the beauty will unfold naturally and without effort.
How beautiful. A master class not only in woodwork but in life. It goes to show that it is never too late to get to understand someone at a deeper level, even a parent who you would naturally presume you already knew so very well.
Knowing one another only gets deeper when we are willing to appreciate ourselves in the same quality.
This reminds me of what is possible when you connect with another and understand what they bring while also knowing what you bring, and allowing the magic and all that is possible in combining your qualities to produce a value in a product that will be felt.
Imagine attending a school where there was the space to allow each child’s process and pace, and a focus on connection and feeling what is needed rather than the pressure of getting through a syllabus or passing assessments. I think we can learn a lot from others like your Dad who understands working in harmony.
To observe someone who is so present with any task or particular way of working is an absolute joy – my whole body re-configures to harmony within a very short while.
I love coming back to this blog and feeling the warmth and heart of your Dad, anonymous. The love just comes pouring through your words and it is so enriching and filling to feel. Thanks for sharing.
Our judgements and pre-dispositions prevent us from understanding the gold that is within each and every one of us.
The judgement laces the true potential to love one another that often falls short off the mark of the simplicity we are offered to live in communities resulting instead in the comparison and jealousy that riddles all forms of communication.
When I re-visit this article I am always touched by the quality I feel from the way you observed and honoured the qualities you saw in your dad as he worked. A point of inspiration for my day.
This allows us to feel and recognise the quality of the relationships we have with one another and to stop often to honour and appreciate them.
It is great when we clock and feel tension in our bodies, and then bring understanding as to why it is there, ‘ I sat wondering why there was tension in my body and what was my investment in having to have these pieces completed quickly when there was no deadline.’
I wonder if your Dad shouldn’t teach carpentry lessons? I know that I would so appreciate being taught by someone who has such a love for what they are doing and so why wouldn’t they enjoy
taking their time preparing and then there’s the delight in coming to the fulfillment of a job well done.
This blog is a beautiful sharing, how your dad built the playground equipment was so gorgeous and inspiring, and yes, he could teach and inspire many.
Who needs TV when there is so much to share, teach, listen to and learn from one another! All of those reality TV shows are put to shame by what can happen in a conversation or by watching someone work…
The inspiration that is offered by another with our daily routines and interactions teach us so much about life and what can be lived by others with no perfection or ideals to fill.
My dad taught me once how to put up fences on the farm, I had seen these fences every day of my life to that point but to be actually shown how it was done by a master was something else, there was a lot of precision involved as well and learning the way to tie up the wire so it looked neat and wouldn’t slip and the footings for the strainer posts so they would stay straight for years to come. So many things in life we can look at and take for granted without appreciating the time effort and precision that goes into them.
My Dad taught me the joy of gardening. It was never a chore as he would attend to the plants with an effortless manner and it became part of his rhythm.
It’s a good point how we can take things for granted or not appreciate all that has gone into making them how they are until we stop and see the details involved or have a go at doing it ourself!
I absolutely loved reading this saga on, there is so much to learn from the pace and precision your father took, I would be a bit like you ! It’s great to appreciate and learn from others wisdom and loved way.
Anonymous, I really love reading this article, it makes me appreciate the care and dedication that it is possible to work with, when I work in a careful, loving way it feels amazing, if I rush to get the job done, the quality is not there and I make mistakes and the work has not been enjoyable.
The feel of your blog is so yummy, Anonymous. The feel of your agitation on the first day slowly turning in to appreciation on the second feels such a loving process you allowed yourself. Your feeling blessed by the third day and being able to appreciate the teaching your father brought forth ‘of the true power of working with an energetic quality that serves all’ is a blessing for us all – as it is also ‘…truly a blessing for each child that engages in its true purpose to play!’ Exquisite.
It’s so common to try to run up the career ladder as quickly as possible going from better job to better job with more and more pay. But if we have not taken care of the quality of our work in each job before we move on what are we taking with us and what foundation have we built?
Sometimes we miss the true beauty of someone because it’s been there our whole life. Or perhaps it’s just familiar and usual for you to see. It’s crucial we don’t forget how exceptional we are, and keep enjoying and appreciating the beauty that comes our way. Why should it be rare and occasional when it could be our everyday? Thank you Anonymous and your Dad for this great blog.
‘ “Just a minute.” Although I said nothing, I sat a bit annoyed with having to wait, not taking into consideration that my Dad was appreciating the moment and what was on offer for him to learn.’ I love how your father wasn’t being swayed by any push to get on with things, knowing that allowing space to communicate what’s needed is actually what brings the quality of work through. This is a wonderful reminder for me as I can get caught up in doing to get things done but not stopping to align to a quality that will be supportive for all.
I would totally definitely like to work with your Dad. There is so much for me to learn here about working respectfully, spaciously and in honour of the quality of what is to be done… thank you for sharing what you learnt alongside him.