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Family, Relationships, Workplace 473 Comments on Carpentry – A Lesson on Energetic Quality from my 75 year old Dad

Carpentry – A Lesson on Energetic Quality from my 75 year old Dad

By Anonymous · On September 23, 2017 ·Photography by Joseph Barker

My Dad has always been a handyman, one of those guys who had no formal qualifications but was able to look at what needed fixing and before long, it was completed. His support was always offered when jobs needed to be done around the house, or when I was a child he would build toys and cubby houses from scratch for my siblings and me to enjoy.

I recently asked him for some support with a project that was being set up with the local park community. They were asking residents to help build a new nature playground and for volunteers to construct a small table and a sorting box for the play space amongst the bushes. I approached my Dad and asked if he was interested as he loved to work with wood, and his backyard was a permanent display of benches and picnic tables he had built over the years.

Over the next 3 days I had the privilege of working and standing in deep appreciation of this man and his relationship with wood and the craftsmanship of carpentry.

Day One: Preparation Stage

My Dad waited patiently for the materials to be dropped off at his home from the local hardware store. When I arrived he had already placed all of his working materials meticulously on the bench: an assortment of cutters and tools that he had used regularly and that he knew would support him to design and build these pieces. He checked that he had easy access to the area and that there was plenty of workspace for him to move around as he manipulated the materials.

I sat with my Dad and discussed the design, asking him for support and possible options in ways we would start the process. I noticed that as I worked there was this inbuilt urgency to get it up and running as my Dad continued to ponder on the measurements, sizing up and spending time feeling the wood and how it would react to the cutting processes.

I could feel a bit of agitation in my body. I was going into the ‘get it done’ mode and my Dad, in his clear and calm voice, repeated the words … “Just a minute.” Although I said nothing, I sat a bit annoyed with having to wait, not taking into consideration that my Dad was appreciating the moment and what was on offer for him to learn.

Our next stage was to begin measuring and marking the wood so that it could be cut into the correct sizes to be assembled. I went into auto pilot mode and started to measure at fast speed with a simple metal ruler. My Dad asked if I was checking the measurements from both sides, as he had noticed that the wood panels were slightly raised and that this fact could alter the accuracy. I wasn’t sure what he meant and replied, “…I think so.” Within minutes my Dad appeared with a tape measure and with a steady voice showed me the importance of taking your time and measuring both sides of the wood to achieve accuracy, as this was the difference, he said, between a balanced or lopsided table.

After stopping for a cuppa and a quick bite to eat, I presumed we would continue with the cutting and assembling process. My Dad replied… “That’s it for today. I need to sit and draw the measurements and we can start cutting tomorrow morning. This will give me time to check that all the blades are working and I have all the tools ready to go in the morning.” I stood a bit confused, slightly annoyed, as I had a plan in my head of having this finished within the day. I hesitated a bit and then agreed and headed home.

For the rest of the day this agitation stayed with me. I sat wondering why there was tension in my body and what was my investment in having to have these pieces completed quickly when there was no deadline. I knew that I had given the job to a person who would produce an incredible piece of woodwork for all who visited the park to enjoy, but the speed to complete the process was leaving me feeling uncomfortable.

The next morning I woke and read the following quote from a book by Serge Benhayon “If everything is energy, therefore, everything is BECAUSE of energy.” (Serge Benhayon, Esoteric Teachings & Revelations, p 220)

A big ouch moment was felt. I was driven by the energy of doing and my Dad stayed steady in the energy of being.

 I could feel how the doing was running my body whilst my Dad stayed consistent with himself and did what was needed on that day, nothing more and nothing less. Being with himself was paramount, as this was the quality of energy the work would be completed in.

 Day Two: Cutting Stage

I arrived early to begin the cutting stage. My Dad had already positioned all the wood panels on the large working bench and had his assortment of safety gear ready to go. I watched how he planned each move so that he was taking care of his body, whilst at the same time working with the heavy and loud machinery. He asked me to sand the pieces and encouraged me to wear a pair of safety glasses and gloves to avoid injury and any splinters.

I had noticed that on day two as I was coming to work on the project, I was starting to truly appreciate being with my Dad in the process. There was an ease in which the cutting stage was completed. Our communication was clear and each part of the process moved with clear precision and flow. The urgency that I felt the day before was gone, as I was now more aware of staying present with the moment, and stood back openly to hear my Dad’s suggestions on how to assemble the items we had worked together to build. We stopped again for a cuppa and a bite to eat and this time I noticed that I was not hungry and did not need to numb the feelings that I had the previous day. The agitation and push was not there and neither was the feeling to distract myself with food.

My Dad then mapped out the floor space in his work shed, placed all the pieces on the floor, like a large Lego construction site, and locked the shed door saying… “Tomorrow is the best part. That’s when it all comes together and you get to see your hard work.” It was humbling to hear my Dad appreciate and settle into the joy he would experience the next day. He was in no hurry to complete what he knew was a process that would be worth the wait.

Day Three: Assembling Stage

I unexpectedly arrived slightly later on the third day and thought my Dad would be up already assembling the play equipment. Surprisingly, he waited until I arrived and said… “Jobs like these are a two man job. You can’t beat the precision that comes from two people getting the job done.”

So together, like the foundation of the previous day, we assembled two amazing nature play pieces for our local park community with ease, precision and incredible accuracy.

I sat, extremely blessed to have shared in this moment with my Dad. I stopped to appreciate the incredible levels of patience and craftsmanship he had shown in moulding each piece of wood and the steady pace that he worked at to prevent errors, and how he honored himself in each step with rest and reflection.

My Dad was truly inspiring in his actions and was a great reflection that reminded me of the works of Serge Benhayon and the Ancient Wisdom, teaching us of the true power of working with an energetic quality that serves all.

The nature playground equipment now nestles amongst the trees in the local park that I pass each day. The way in which this was made – the care, dedication and precision of my Dad and his skills – is truly a blessing for each child that engages in its true purpose to play!

By Anonymous

Further Reading:
Washing my Car: a Lesson in Appreciation and Self-Care
‘The Joy of Ageing, Esoterically’
The fall of ‘quality’, the rise of a Quality

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473 Comments

  • Mary says: March 19, 2020 at 4:39 pm

    This to me is such a beautiful sharing
    ‘I could feel a bit of agitation in my body. I was going into the ‘get it done’ mode and my Dad, in his clear and calm voice, repeated the words … “Just a minute.” Although I said nothing, I sat a bit annoyed with having to wait, not taking into consideration that my Dad was appreciating the moment and what was on offer for him to learn.’
    I know those moments of agitation in my body and I have found to stop and ask myself what is going on? What is my body showing me is so incredibly supportive to go deeper to pick apart the anxiousness so that it has less of an impact on me. We can so easily get caught in the anxiousness, and then we are not ourselves and live from reaction not a settlement.

    Reply
  • Mary Adler says: December 17, 2019 at 4:26 pm

    The attention to detail and precision of your Dad’s working and his appreciation of the materials he was working with will be felt by every child who enjoys playing in the park.

    Reply
  • Viktoria says: July 23, 2019 at 3:01 pm

    Different aspects of life touch us differently, we can all see the beauty in various things which another person may not be able to – for some people it’s working with children, for other people it’s working in hospitals and third it can be nature, wood, or even cement and concrete. Who are we to judge what is what and for whom? We can only learn and appreciate, look at it and see the beauty in places we have not before.

    Reply
  • Greg Barnes says: July 23, 2019 at 4:40 am

    What a great blog, as we can all take a leaf out of the book of revelations you have shared about your dad.

    Reply
  • Leigh Matson says: June 27, 2019 at 3:50 pm

    Rushing a task these days feels really horrible. Giving it the right amount of space to look after yourself while it gets done helps bring a quality of care into it that can be felt by others.

    Reply
    • Greg Barnes says: July 23, 2019 at 4:43 am

      So True Leigh, when we bring integrity to what we do this energy is felt, as is shared in the blog with the Serge quote.

      Reply
  • Vicky Cooke says: May 18, 2019 at 1:59 am

    We all could (the world), have something to learn from your dad. He sounds and feels like a very beautifull man and I concur what others have shared in the comments in that I would love to spend a few days with him too, I feel there is a lot he could teach me and certainly much to appreciate in and with him. Moments like this are so precious and magical ✨

    Reply
  • Rachel Murtagh says: March 27, 2019 at 8:16 pm

    There is much we can learn from your Dad, anonymous. Getting anything done in quality means no rush, push or drive.

    Reply
  • LE says: March 12, 2019 at 7:39 am

    Everyday I wake up loving my dad more, the more older I get the more I deeply appreciate him and all his amazing qualities.

    Reply
  • Caroline Francis says: March 5, 2019 at 2:58 pm

    Yes and to deeply appreciate and confirm the quality sets the standard for a way of life.

    Reply
  • Lucy Dahill says: March 2, 2019 at 10:31 am

    What an opportunity for so much appreciation. Firstly of the connection with your dad, secondly of the skills he brings, and thirdly of the importance of the difference between rushing a job to get it done and truly honouring the quality in a job that will last for many more years.

    Reply
    • Mary says: May 29, 2020 at 3:05 pm

      Lucy I agree with you the care and detail that went into the project has such a depth of quality to it that surely it can be felt and appreciated by everyone that uses the playground equipment. In the doing there is no quality the quality comes from our innermost connection with ourselves that’s the most delicious quality of all.

      Reply
  • Lorraine Wellman says: February 7, 2019 at 3:43 am

    I love how we can be such a great reflection and inspiration for those around us, this blog is a lovely example of that.

    Reply
  • kehinde2012 says: December 26, 2018 at 6:05 pm

    To begin and complete a project with love, care, attention and without hurry is the way to be. We can all learn much from your father’s steady thoughtful. considered way and apply it to our own lives, from taking a shower or bath, preparing a meal or cleaning our homes. What is important is the quality we bring to each.

    Reply
    • Mary says: February 25, 2022 at 3:55 pm

      kehinde2012 I have just completed my first business trip abroad and what I noticed is that everyone is still in that energy of hurrying got to get somewhere, do something, so much agitation and nervous energy being used. The world stopped for 2 years by all governments and then the green light to restart was given and everyone seems to have gone straight into drive mode if not more so to try and catch up from where they left off. What is missing is the quality that we do something in and with. We want everything to return back to ‘normal’ but ‘normal’ is not working and will never work, what is still missing is the quality of our everyday movements.

      Reply
  • jennym says: November 30, 2018 at 6:15 am

    It is a beautiful thing to watch a person who works in absolute harmony, their movements can reflect such precision and grace.

    Reply
  • Carola Woods says: November 13, 2018 at 5:53 am

    This is a great reminder for us all, of the truth that we are all are beholders of wisdom and the more we are open to the wisdom of another the more we as a humanity will evolve together. We have so much to learn from each other and support and inspire each other with.

    Reply
  • Rebecca says: November 11, 2018 at 5:41 pm

    I love this; ‘ Being with himself was paramount, as this was the quality of energy the work would be completed in.’ It makes me realise that I get caught up in the doing and being busy rather than staying with me and moving in my naturally gentle and calm way.

    Reply
  • Rebecca says: November 11, 2018 at 5:36 pm

    I really love reading about your dad and the integrity, precision and care that he works with – this is truly inspiring.

    Reply
  • Meg says: September 30, 2018 at 3:24 pm

    You’re blog reminds me of the saying everything in it’s right place. I think today we can be increasingly impatient to get things done and move onto the next thing and we are loosing the sense of when things need to be done and the art of working hard that the older generation seemed to naturally espouse.

    Reply
    • Lucy Dahill says: March 2, 2019 at 10:33 am

      Yes there is a sense of order and precision that comes when everything happens when it is supposed to happen. That doesn’t mean slowly, it means being sensitive to the movements that lead to the completion of the task at hand.

      Reply
  • Samantha Davidson says: September 26, 2018 at 1:52 am

    I love that there are life lessons everywhere, and we can if we are open learn at any moment, appreciate, love, refine who we are and our relationship with the world and humanity. In any moment.

    Reply
    • Carola Woods says: November 13, 2018 at 6:03 am

      Agree Samantha – openness is the key for us all to deepen our relationships with ourselves, with others and with life in order for us as a humanity to evolve.

      Reply
  • Sam says: September 14, 2018 at 2:36 am

    I have learnt so much from my father, there is real steadiness from my parents that I so appreciate. My dad has such a great sense of humour and will always make me laugh.
    Being open to the love that others share in their own way is one of the absolute magical and wonderful things about life.

    Reply
    • Nattalija says: October 26, 2018 at 8:19 am

      In recent months I have witnessed the absolute playfulness and tenderness of my father with the arrival of a new grandchild. Showing the reflection in both the young and old of the deep delicateness that men hold!

      Reply
  • Joseph Barker says: September 6, 2018 at 12:35 pm

    We all have the tools to deliver divinity naturally. Just avoid getting caught up in stress and panic – stay steady with our body and we’ll help produce experiences crafted with Love and truth.

    Reply
  • Natalie Hawthorne says: August 29, 2018 at 3:07 pm

    Wow what a blessing that was for you to experience with your father. I just adore spending time with our elders and experiencing their wisdom that they have to pass on. The level of integrity that a lot of them live to is a marker of their generation, the commitment to giving it your all and doing the best you can in what ever you are doing, right to the end. When I stop and look at today and the younger generations coming through there is a marked difference as to how they are living life and what they are committing to.

    Reply
  • Sam says: August 29, 2018 at 5:45 am

    I love this, your dad sounds gorgeous, we can learn so much from one another – society is filled with much distrust and critic for another, when we break down these boundaries and actually see the divinity in another we can not but learn. Together we Evolve.

    Reply
  • Rebecca says: August 22, 2018 at 3:00 pm

    Reading this article makes me realise how inspiring our elders can be and what important role models they can be for younger generations. I have elders in my life that work with care, gentleness and integrity and this is very beautiful to see and be inspired by.

    Reply
    • Michelle Mcwaters says: August 25, 2018 at 3:43 pm

      The power of influence and support elders can have on a community cannot be underestimated. We are all really losing out when elders lose that sense of being claimed and authoritative in what they know to be true. Too many of our elders have lost that spark, giving up on life. This really is a tragedy for society, especially for our children who can benefit so much from the wisdom elders have to impart.

      Reply
  • Rebecca says: August 22, 2018 at 2:57 pm

    Anonymous, I really love reading this article. I can feel that the way your dad worked – with care, dedication and precision and no rush or drive is a beautiful way to work and a way that is an inspiration for younger generations. People like your dad are much needed role models to show that it is the quality not the speed that is important.

    Reply
  • kev mchardy says: August 20, 2018 at 1:02 pm

    Living in a country like England with all the history and very old buildings it is plain to see we have lost a lot of true craftsmanship over the years as the trade off for cheaper buildings that are not built to last takes over. It is so important to appreciate true craftsmanship and be inspired by past generations not to lose this way of doing things completely.

    Reply
  • hm says: August 19, 2018 at 6:52 pm

    We forget the importance of time and quality in this day and age. I appreciate reading this as it shows how important it is to focus, give something space and complete it in full. How often does that apply to society today? Rare it seems

    Reply
  • Christoph Schnelle says: August 14, 2018 at 7:03 pm

    That is very true and to notice the sense of enjoyment or even joy.

    Reply
  • Christoph Schnelle says: August 14, 2018 at 7:01 pm

    The combination of love and absolute attention to detail is very powerful.

    Reply
  • Sam says: August 9, 2018 at 7:23 am

    We can learn so much from others, all we need to do is be open and willing to see Gods spark thats in all of us.
    There are so many different expressions of divinity.

    Reply
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