About a year ago, when I first started working as the general manager in a deli/café, I decided I needed to do a coffee tasting. Coffee is a huge part of the business and as I hadn’t had any coffee for at least 4-5 years, I wanted to get an understanding of what it is that we sell. So I tried a decaf espresso, which was full-on.
FROM HIDEOUS TO REALLY TASTY
I hated it. Espresso, which is pure and neat in its extraction of the coffee, has nothing to disguise it and my reaction was immediate, as if my taste buds were saying to me: “What are you doing – are you crazy? This is hideous!”.
I then tried the espresso with some soya milk and this was not so invasive but still full on… I only managed to have a couple of sips of each and that was it. Then, an hour later, a headache appeared and my stomach started to feel weird.
The one thing that really shocked me though was the quick change from “What the heck are you doing, this is hideous” to (after a disguised, milky, soya flat white and a few sips of that) going “Hmmm… this is actually really tasty”.
How quickly it started to grow on me! It reminded me of when I first started to drink alcohol and started smoking. They were both naturally hideous and my body didn’t want to do either, but I overrode what I really felt so I could fit in, be accepted and look cool!
UPPING THE COFFEE ANTE – I GET SEDUCED…
My ‘romance’ with coffee didn’t end there – recently I had to choose a new blend of coffee for our customers.
So the coffee tasting began… I was having a look at the crèma, which looked perfect, and the smell was alive with lots of different scents – liquorice, almond and chocolate jumped out at me!
At that point I was slowly getting seduced all over again and I thought: “I’ll try it – I need to know what the coffee I have chosen for the deli tastes like.” Isn’t it interesting how the mind will quickly justify an action to make it OK to do! This was the start of the override again…
There were two types of blends so I had a couple of sips of each espresso and then another couple of sips of two flat whites.
By the end of the second espresso I could start to feel the change in my body… and by the end of the second flat white I was starting to like it, enjoying the flavours… I stopped there, knowing which blend was going to work best for the deli and the customers…
FEELING THE IMPACT OF COFFEE – THE HARD WAY
But for me, it was too late – by the end of the second flat white I was really starting to feel ‘off the wall’ and super-racy! “Oh my goodness! What have I just done?!” I’m thinking. It felt like I was on drugs big time… really bad speed, or something like that! My head felt really strange – like it was going to pop or explode. My heart was going super-fast, and I was completely off the wall in my behaviour – all the deli assistants were laughing at me, as they could all see the change in me.
It lasted for quite some time – we’d started the coffee tasting at 10.30am and I was still feeling traces of it at 8pm that night – and the following two days I had these really intense, full-on headaches that were hideous. I could see how people can get hooked – if I’d had another coffee, all those symptoms would have disappeared instantly.
This week I had another trip to the roastery, but this time I decided that I would spit the tasting – my body thanked me for this!
I LOVE MAKING COFFEES, BUT WHY WOULD I BE ANYTHING ELSE BUT ME?
I started making coffees when I was 15. I love making coffees, and I still do.
I love the smell of coffee and I still do, but I don’t like what it does to my body so I don’t drink it any more. It’s like some foods and how they taste and what they do to my body: I have decided to leave them out of my diet because I don’t like how I feel after I’ve eaten them, even if they taste amazing at the time – it’s not worth it!
However, this most recent coffee tasting experience really confirmed for me that I just don’t want to feel like that anymore. It also confirmed for me what happens when I let my mind override and ‘explain away’ what I’m really feeling in my body and know is right for me.
I feel so AMAZING when I’m just me – without anything else influencing me – and I know now: NOTHING ELSE is acceptable!
I’m at a point in my life where what I have chosen is SERIOUSLY AWESOME and I feel SERIOUSLY AMAZING for it. I feel so clear, on to it, light and consistent. I have so much respect for my body and myself that I am not prepared to compromise any more.
Inspired by the Awesome work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.
By Natalie Hawthorne, London, UK
798 Comments
It sounds like coffee is an easy addictive. What is addiction? Something we can’t let go because it makes us feel a certain way. The fact is we want and choose to be addicted to things that keep us away from feeling and being our true selves. Why would we not choose to be addicted to being and feeling amazing instead? It’s actually more simple.
I remember those headaches all too well, especially when I would come off the coffee and try to detox, then start to feel better and then the thought ‘one won’t hurt’ – then back to square one.
Overriding is the beginning of every slippery slope and dodgy decision I make. Instead of putting focus on how incredible it is that our body knows exactly what it needs and is good for it, we focus on what we think we will get out of the override. That can range from a moment of tasting something sweet, salty, stimulating etc. to fitting in with the crowd.
It is quite a paradigm shift in what society is doing: they drink coffee to feel happy, and you don’t drink coffee to keep on feeling well, not happy, but ongoing amazing. What would you chose?
We often hear people say that smoking is not good for your health and that too much alcohol is also bad for you, but rarely do you hear people putting the effects of coffee in the same category. It’s very telling when we as a humanity have gotten to the point where we cannot function without our morning coffee but isn’t this showing us how exhausted we are, and that coffee can be an addiction. What is not common knowledge, is the long-term effects of drinking coffee and what it does to our bodies.
It is extraordinary how we can adapt… Even to the constant ingestion of a proven psychotropic beverage!
I gave up my coffee addiction over 20 years ago and I have never ever looked back. Caffeine is so poisonous that I found the 7 days of withdrawal worst than that of giving up cigarettes. I gave up because I no longer wanted to be a slave to an industry that profits off such things or partake in a substance that dictated the movements in my day. I was claiming myself back. Some years later I came upon Universal Medicine and realised that I poison myself even more than any substance with denigrating thoughts that keep me down, so from then, there has been a whole new poison to discard of and replace with the knowing of the grandness of who I innately am and I tell you this process has taken a lot longer than 7 days!
Yes, our addictions can come in many forms not just food and beverages though these are easy to relate to. When we do not deal with the source of our addictive behaviours such as negative self-talk being one, we cannot truly address the behaviours that are born out of these untruths.
Thank you for exposing how the mind plays tricks on us so that we easily slip into starting to justify our actions when if we only listened to our bodes messages then it is loud and clear that even having a sip or two is a slippery slope into disregard and abuse.
It is the same with emotions- when we don’t observe how we are feeling and what is going on for us but instead go into the emotions it can have a similar effect on the body- of feeling like something else is taking over. I am learning to be much more honouring of what my body feels so that I can be more aware and not allow myself to be taken by the emotions of events in life.
So true and I can feel how I have used this in the past as an escape and wallowed in my emotions as a way of avoiding feeling empty.
It is interesting to observe the impact on society of coffee today. It has become an additional extra to our daily dress. Clothes, shoes, coffee to start the day. Could it be possible that coffee is driving our day and sustaining our levels of energy?
Yes there are coffee shops on every corner a bit like petrol stations, and if we fill up with the incorrect fuel much like our cars the body will eventually break down.
I had a decaf coffee recently and it resulted in a sleepless and anxious night and a very difficult day at work afterwards. As delicious as that coffee was i know I never want to feel that way again. I haven’t been tempted to try it again since.
Leonne the temptations are always there and sometimes we fold and go with it, tastes pretty good usually and then as you say bam the body cops it. The more I listen, honour and respect my body the more I feel vital, joyful and alive.
It really is quite something when the body says… ‘I can no longer eat this anymore’ and whilst the taste buds and ‘smell buds’ might be in disagreement the body does have the last word. Making myself feel ill, racy or bloated is not worth the yummy taste for 2 moments compared with a week of feeling not great.
Lies grow on us not by attrition but by us negating and overriding what we have felt. Our spirit has free reign once we have ignored what our Soul has to say. Thanks Natalie for brewing this blog up.
Love the pun Joseph, but that is exactly what is happening and how the spirit is brewing up an illusion that your body is doing well and functioning. So awesome to crack the veil.
“I love the smell of coffee and I still do, but I don’t like what it does to my body so I don’t drink it any more. It’s like some foods and how they taste and what they do to my body: I have decided to leave them out of my diet because I don’t like how I feel after I’ve eaten them, even if they taste amazing at the time – it’s not worth it!” – Natalie, this is so beautiful to feel how you have been able to bring in the strength of self care and self love to say no to something that does not support your body! I love how you shared the details of your experience too – Very inspiring indeed!
Many year ago I gave up coffee, three years ago when I went out with friends and had decaffeinated coffee it had a racy affect on my heart and whole body. So thank you Natalie, for sharing about your experience with coffee, and the funny thing is that when I gave up coffee I also gave up sugar and sugars and sweet fruits have a similar effect on my head and body as coffee.
Yes Greg I too noticed the different levels of effects sugar was having so the process of not taking that into the body was a transitional one. From sugar to honey and maple syrup and that was much better than refined sugar but then over time it became a place when I would just get strong headaches. So now it is nothing and it feels so much better. We are always refining and tweaking to where we are at and it is just a matter of listening to the body.
wow this is so exposing of how easily we are attracted and even addicted to things that harm us – isn’t that weird? Points to something else going on here. It seems we have different openings with similar results. For one it might be coffee and for another it could be relationship, food, gambling, certain thoughts etc etc. Might find a clue here: http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index/unimedpedia-spirit.html at Unimedpedia Spirit!
Awesome thanks Nicola such a support to get a better understanding on how habits, patterns and behaviours can dominate our lives. How simple it is and it is just a choice.
How do we learn? From feeling the impact of the choices we make on our body. So if we remove these feelings we have you can see how we stunt ourselves from any growth at all. This is the harm of substances like coffee that take us away from feeling the truth. But it really can apply to anything we use to stimulate us and escape from reality. Thank you Natalie.
Well said Joseph, all substances take us away from feeling the truth which is a representation of how we don’t want to take responsibility for our choices. When you start to address the checking out and the numbed way of living, life starts to become a lot more enjoyable.
Caffeine is a poison the coffee plant puts out to kill bugs. The body responds to this dose of poison with a spike of adrenaline and this is what people do to themselves to kick start themselves in the morning and of course what peaks must drop and so the yoyo effect with the nervous system goes on. Even decaf has traces of this poison so I am not surprise at your body’s reaction.
Then we add sugar, which could be concluded to be even worse than caffeine?
The taste, smell and flavours of food can be so seducing but oh so momentary whilst the after effects last way much longer.
It is absolutely the consequences of our choice and how the body is not able to avoid such outcomes of what we chose.
It is so amazing, a science of its own really, how our bodies continually refer to us the truth of our choices, and the effect our choices are having on our body and being. And what an insidious trap it is to engage the energy of overriding this truth, as it is what leads us to accepting abuse to be normal. And yet when we honor the truth in our bodies, our being is freed to shine the amazingness of who we are, of which there is nothing in this world that can compare to this feeling.
So beautifully shared Carola and yes an insidious trap we can get sucked into of overriding the truth. When you say no to this and honour our bodies as you say it truly is beautiful and the more you confirm this the more power we are.
It is so common nowadays to drink coffee that we forget that it is deeply toxic to the body. This is a very convenient forgetting on our part.
So true Elizabeth, there is no denying the toxicity of coffee, as the body is constantly reflecting this truth. Yet in our indulgence in overriding the body’s intelligence, to avoid responsibility we continue to find ways to mask this with flavours, sweeteners and blends, with our bodies left feeling far less than vital and free.
Correct Carola and Elizabeth, the avoidance of the responsibility that a) we got ourselves to a state of being that is exhausted and b) that if we were vital what could we then be capable of living. We know deep down that there is so much more but keep paying so much less and it isn’t actually that much fun at all, yet those moments of taste sensations and pick me ups are what we call a high. How lost are we really?
It’s interesting that when coffee is stopped how there is a detox to go through, aches, tiredness, exhaustion, headache, I have experienced this myself and seen it in others, it speaks for itself that it is a poison to the body, and then If tried again the effects on the body can be clearly felt and we get to feel the true impact it has on our body.
Yes Ruth it is unquestionable once you go through the phase of having the poisons leaving the body it is a very tangible experience. This is what has been the final confirmations when stopping coffee, alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, sugar.. The more we let ourselves feel the truth of what the body is communicating to us then the more you feel what is harming the body.
Drinking coffee is something I gave up around 25 years ago and was sick for 3 weeks before the toxins left my body. I had headaches, shivering, sweats, stomach cramps and when it was all over, I vowed I would never go through that again. If it took that to get the poison out of my body, it needed to stay well away from me. And I have not had a sip since – no thanks.
That’s what I have also started to appreciate and get that if our bodies are clearly telling us that something doesn’t agree with it then we have to respect and honour what the body is telling us. So many times in my life I have overridden what I have felt to keep up with all those around me. It is such a point of return when we say hey I know what is best for me and my body and that’s why I am choosing it.
I used to love mugs of seriously strong black coffee during the day. After stopping drinking it for several years, I was offered a coffee that was infiltrating the air in the area with a powerful and evocative smell and I was seduced into deciding to have one small cup to see how it tasted again.
Seriously ill choice – which my body left me in no doubt about – within less than 5 minutes, my adrenals kicked in and I could not stop shaking from head to toe and for a while even unable to sign my name on a document that needed to be completed.
A while ago I had an operation which I needed eight weeks or so to recoup but being self employed I went back to work after about three. I had absolutely no energy so I turned to my old mates caffeine and sugar, bad move! I started having the odd decaf and over a period of time became quite dependant on it to the point if I couldn’t get a decaf, I would have a full on coffee and then it got to the point where decaf wasn’t cutting the mustard so I was mainly having the real McCoy and I have to admit it felt like I was fully addicted and something I would have trouble stopping. Caffeine is a drug and no matter what anyone says it is not good for you in any amount. At the end off the day I always felt knackered. Into the second week of kicking the habit again I started to feel normal and had energy left at the end of the day and I am feeling so much better in general. What is crazy is the amount of coffee places that have popped up everywhere over the last few years. The thing that people are using to cope with their exhaustion is only making their exhaustion worse.
That’s so true Kev, the vicious cycle of an addiction you know is not supportive or working for you yet you couldn’t possible imagine your life with out it, and if you did you certainly would panic that it wasn’t there for your next hit. The amount of times I have had customers totally hanging and in desperate need for their caffeine fix they can get a little edgy to say the least.
‘However, this most recent coffee tasting experience really confirmed for me that I just don’t want to feel like that anymore’ Sometimes we may judge ourselves by having fallen in eating something that we know doesn’t support us, but sometimes we need that last confirmation, to definitely close the door to it.
Absolutely Amparo, it was like that with everything that I have stopped that I couldn’t handle any longer feeling out of sorts or totally smashed by what I had consumed. if you do it for any other reason then you haven’t truly honoured what you felt and there has to be a level of imbalance because it truly wasn’t your call from you body saying No More.
Natalie, it is great that you have written about how adversely affected your body and wellbeing were, just from drinking small amounts of coffee. In a world where coffee consumption has gone through the roof this is a much needed blog to alert us to the fact of how our bodies are assaulted when we drink this beverage.
It sure is Elizabeth, and what I find fascinating is that everyone knows how it is having an effect and that it isn’t great yet to consider why we want or need it. We know that if we start to look deeper there is actually a lot more going on than we care to admit.
As a reformed caffeine addict that had to have my ‘fix’ every morning before I could be even remotely civil to the world, I am now pleased to say that my morning brew is me. That is, when you are that hooked on something, you cannot let go of it until you replace it with something far greater and this greatness is simply us – our true self that has been in hiding for so long. Once this is felt, our behaviours start to shift so that to the best of our ability we do not do anything that stifles our expression of this.
Liane that is exactly what happens and so beautifully expressed. There really is no other fix that is better or grander than being who we are, the beautiful being within that doesn’t need any fix what so ever.
It feels like you have provided a real key here Liane to dealing with habits like coffee drinking. I recently allowed myself to get pulled into the comfort of having a decaf espresso and experienced almost an identical chain of events that Natalie described above, completely overriding my initial response to the incredibly bitter taste that made my stomach tie into knots and had me bouncing off the walls and unable to sleep. So why would I go to a drink that did that to me? Well, it completely coincided with my reaction to some things that were very much disturbing me at my workplace, but that I held inside without expressing and let it roll around in my head for days. Therefore, the coffee was a great way to avoid feeling what was going on for me and dealing with it. Only after working through this with honesty and staying open to the individuals involved in the workplace issue without holding back how I felt did I easily let go of the pull to drink something that would take me out of my normal feeling self.
Yes it’s amazing how we turn to food and drink when we don’t want to feel what is around us or going on in relationships. So cool to call it out for what it is.
I never liked the taste of coffee but was shown by work colleagues to make it into a milky coffee with lots of sugar, and before I knew it, I was drinking several a day. Then slowly the coffee got stronger, and the milk was reduced, and the cups turned into mugs. Now I am thankful to say that I kicked the coffee habit and now will say I like the smell, but I know I will not like the bitter taste.
It’s amazing what we would have said to be fine and normal over times becomes all about the people and your connections. Th ekey is to make it about this first and then all of ourselves follows.
Our body does not like things like tea, coffee, smoking, alcohol when we first try them for a reason … because it is a poison to the body and this is what it is saying. However, as you found out just how quick is the spirit to override this and go ‘actually this is quite nice!’ hence now we currently have at LEAST 3 coffee shops of if not more on every street or every side of the street. Supermarkets are now also even giving shoppers free coffee when they are shopping so we walk around doing our shopping drinking coffee!!!! It seems there is not a moment we can do without this. SO. What are we wanting to avoid if we are so desperate to override our body the whole time?
It was amazing the other night I was out with some work colleagues and I didn’t drink any alcohol along with two other ladies at the table. One who was said ‘well yes it is a poison’, and then proceeded to share a bottle. I totally remember being aware of the assualt and harm it was causing in my body but over rode and ignored it. It has to start with us looking at what is it that we are not wanting to feel and deal with that leads us to that point of abuse.
To know what feels how in our bodies is an absolute gift. How amazing to have that process and not just follow suit by hearsay. And to be able to feel the effects confirm our clarity and to honor this, is love built and deepened with ourselves, so much to appreciation.
Yes Adele so true once I stopped walking through life as a robot so to speak and doing what I had been doing my whole life and what others around me did, I then gave myself the opportunity to feel that possible somethings didn’t actually suit me. That I had immune myself to things even thou they had a massive effect on me. One by one I have slowly played around with and experimented what things have been doing to my body and being. It has been a fascinating process and one that is forever continual as we are constantly evolving so things can change over time.
To actually come to the point of being able to feel the effect of this substance in your body, and then to have the presence and inner strength to be able to not actually swallow… Now that is amazing, and inspiring 🙂
Yes Chris that is totally amazing, what I find fascinating still to this day is in the morning when I am dealing with the coffee machine to make sure it is all on point I can tell by the smell if it is too sour or too bitter, just from the nose you can sense exactly where it is at. Just like anything you get to feel it and then you know where it is at. The thought or desire simply is not there because I know what it will do to me. It will shutdown all my senses and everything becomes totally disjointed and disharmonious. No way can I do that again, that is my solid foundation that is super cool.
When we have the will to make change all will be revealed to simply make the change.
Yes Rachel that persistence is interesting as I had that with smoking and alcohol where in the initial experience it was hideous but kept on with it. For me one of the main reasons was to be accepted by my peers and to be cool. Not thinking I was enough to start with.
I always loved the smell of coffee, but on the tasting of it never liked it… I added copious amount of milk to change the taste, so much so it became a milk drink with a dash of coffee. I wasn’t a coffee drinker for long as there came a time when I felt sick drinking it… so stopped pretty soon afterwards. The question to myself is… if I didn’t like it why persist?
The persistence is driven by a force of ignorance of not wanting to be willing to truly look at how we feel and why we are exhausted. The vicious cycle of ignorance deeply encourages a road of distraction. Sometimes obvious other times not.
I could only every drink coffee if it was super weak and full of sugar syrup to disguise the taste – and then, coffee never gave me a buzz (although i did only ever really drink decaf) it just make me super tired – like the effort of processing it through my body was just exhausting!
That’s super interesting Rebecca and just goes to show how each and everyone of us our bodies respond to things in different ways. Just a confirmation that what ever it is if we aren’t feeling connect, steady and vital from the outcome of what we ingest then we have the opportunity to review and change things around and make different choices.
The speed with which we can change our mind on something that is not true for us is quite something. I have found the same throughout my life. I have been sure that I would not do something and the next moment finding myself doing exactly what I knew I would regret and feeling kind of pleased about it. I love the example you share with the coffee because coffee really does taste hideous neat and yet we quickly overcome that, telling ourselves it tastes good or masking it with milk in order to get the quick hit that most of us need to get us through the day.
The taste and flavour of coffee can be seductive so to be able to be honest and say why your turning to it is the biggest step you need to take in returning to our natural harmonious state of being
When I realised that coffee, even decaff coffee was making me feel more tired it made no sense to drink it any more.
I agree Fiona, what I did find tricky at the time was cutting the habit and patterns of having a default mode of just doing what you have done for so long. It is a vicious cycle so to really say no to that is say yes to the amazing beings that we really are and capable of.
I walked into a coffee shop recently, it is one that I used to go to regularly and it was lovely to feel that no part of me wanted to have a cup of coffee any more.
Yes Fiona it is very liberating when we are free from something that has had a hold over us for a long time and has contributed to not being able to connect to who we truly are.
I had a similar experience this week with food. I had stopped eating a lot of foods that made me feel sluggish and then one afternoon chose to eat some of it again, the next morning I woke up and it was like I had to drag my body through the day.
It is such a real experience when you feel it in your body. You can’t deny it especially when you take it out of your diet and then reintroduce it. That happened with me when I stopped eating gluten, boy did I feel the sluggishness, the fogginess bloated from eating it. When I felt how full on it was, I immediately stopped and my quality of life on a consistent and daily basis has been incredible.
We can be so waylaid by our senses of smell and taste and yet when we feel the impact of things like stimulants like coffee we have another layer of information to listen to which really lets us know how we might be draining and exhausting ourselves.
It is fascinating this process and what I find even more fascinating is how we can go on ignoring this for quite some time until our bodies have to make it loud and clear that it can’t and won’t continue like that.