In early 2015, I attended a Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 3 workshop presented by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. I have attended this workshop many times before and every time I gain enormously and learn a lot.
One of the very empowering things that we develop in Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 3, is a deeper connection to our essence, and an understanding of the specific ways we express from our essence.
At one point we looked at how each of us would express “I love you”. It was presented that for many of us it is not a natural thing to express it in the form of only speaking the three words “I love you”, but we do so because we grow up learning this is what is expected and needed from friends and family to say it in that way.
Because it is not our naturally complete form of expression, even when we speak the words our loved ones do not receive all the love and feelings we are wanting to truly communicate to them, the three words are essentially only expressing or capturing a part of what our whole body is otherwise wanting to express from deeper within. In another example, often we can express our love in a gesture or simple action, instead of words, and our partners don’t recognise it, as they are looking to hear it or see it in a way they have been conditioned to receive it, and so, love-expressions can be missed or misunderstood.
It is very joyful to feel and acknowledge the many beautiful ways we can share and receive love with others.
This morning I was on my daily walk with my gorgeous husband Christoph when it started to rain. I was feeling a little tired and not able to walk very fast. As soon as it started to rain he insisted on giving me his hat to protect me. Then when the rain got heavier Christoph took off… ran ahead, went home, got the car and came zooming back to pick me up… even though by then I was only about 3 minutes away from home, enjoying the walk and the rain had stopped!
What I felt was his humongous love and how he wanted to take care of and protect his precious wife. To my ears this was Christoph shouting ‘I LOVE YOU’ from the rooftops with a megaphone. So of course I joyfully got in the car to be with this beautiful loving man.
I then imagined another scenario where I could have responded with anger and said ‘why did you run off?’ I could have said ‘you idiot I am almost home now, I want to keep walking and it is not even raining’. Then I would have missed out big time and he could have felt rejected, then reacted to that hurt and we would have missed that beautiful moment and might even have ended up having a fight.
It also occurred to me that many wars and fights could well (or rather unwell) come out of people not being open to love in its many forms and expressions and how completely crazy that is!
The more I am open to love and allow myself to receive it and express it, the more I see it everywhere… in myself, in others and in nature. I then start to see more clearly how everyone is pure love in essence, and when not expressing in this way it is because they are in reaction and protecting a hurt or imagined hurt – perhaps even from long, long ago.
Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!
If you are interested in the energetic meaning of love, I highly recommend Unimedpedia Love which contain many beautiful quotes and free audio excerpts and can be accessed by clicking this link.
By Nicola Lessing, Business Woman, Goonellabah and published with permission of my husband, Christoph.
Further Reading:
Expressing Love: I Love You
The Highest Form of Intelligence is Love
Trusting Our True Voice and Expression
912 Comments
Love can’t be captured in any words or form, as it’s endless and doesn’t respond to any picture
Nicola you have said it all with these words
‘Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!’
And to be honest I have to wonder why it is that I stubbornly refuse to love myself even though I know I am a son of God I can feel there is a part of me that does not want to admit I made a mistake by choosing to enjoin a consciousness that keeps us all in the separation to God this makes no sense at all. But then why we decided in the first place to live in separation to the vibration of God makes no sense either I would say we have invented or created our own hell.
OH SL
“I highly recommend Unimedpedia Love,” because as like all words that empower us “Love” as in the temporal usage has many meanings so it is important to feel the true meaning that serves everyone equally and leaves no one behind, so Unimed Living (as in Unimedpedia) gives us many words that will evolve us when these words are truly used as it is shared on this web site.
So go to, LOVE at;
http://www.unimedliving.com/voice/whats-on-in-the-world/when-you-say-i-love-you-does-it-come-with-love.html
“Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!”
Yes so true – and when we surrender and feel that love inside we are a love bomb to all we meet.
The only “bomb” that we should be making!
‘It also occurred to me that many wars and fights could well (or rather unwell) come out of people not being open to love in its many forms and expressions and how completely crazy that is!’ Yes – it is crazy Nicola. I have discovered for myself how much love I let in is a choice that depends on how much I let go of the need to control and how much I can love myself. If I can not surrender more deeply to myself, the love I can let in is capped. It is only as I am surrendering more that I am understanding the level at which I have capped myself and how this has affected my relationships.
Michelle we are not taught the truth of true love, we are immersed instead into an emotional soup of false love and so the cycle repeats, generation after generation, fueled all the while by books, stories, films, songs, poems, a regurgitation of emotions so that is all we know and understand. But it is not the truth. It has taken someone who knows the truth inside out and back to front so there is no wriggle room for excuses to remind humanity what true love is so that at least there is a choice to return to our true nature or to stay in the emotional soup.
Finding True-Love as opposed to emotionally (E) attached (A) love (L) is universes apart and even having the two in the same sentence can not deliver the vast difference for EAL is slippery and actually has zero, zilch, none and not one iota of True Love!
Love comes from our movements and when you rush off so you can share a ride no amount of energy could take away from this True gesture of Love..
I know, a bit crazy really, we all really want love, and yet we are love, ‘Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!’
It is a bit nuts therefore to reject it when it comes our way, especially when it reflects to us that love we already are.
Absolutely Michelle, finding True Love is simply removing what is not Love, so expanding what you have shared, our inner-hearts are full of Love.
“The more I am open to love and allow myself to receive it and express it, the more I see it everywhere… in myself, in others and in nature.” A beautiful invitation to feel the boundless love of the Universe.
For me the same here: my love to somebody often does not come from saying “I love you” but from doing things, like handing over a spoon or a blanket. Every act could be done with love, if we choose so.
Yes and often the most loving act can be in not doing something!
We all express love in different ways, and so it is important to be open to receiving love in whatever way it is shared, ‘The more I am open to love and allow myself to receive it and express it, the more I see it everywhere… in myself, in others and in nature. I then start to see more clearly how everyone is pure love in essence’.
It is strange to think that despite many couples communicating “I love you” to each other many times during their time together even in some cases each and every day, they are most likely still holding back love! Yes that’s right! And this causes a massive tension in the relationship because despite the fact of how much they love each other being known, it is not felt or lived on the level that it otherwise could be.
This is because we hold back on truly loving and appreciating ourselves and receiving love (God) which is an energy that is constant and available to all of us everywhere. We cannot share and express what it is we do not live otherwise it is just empty words.
So beautifully shared Nicola. Love in its true expression is always felt in the quality of movements through the vibration that is impulsing those movements or expression. For as you say the words ‘I love you’ may suggest love but the quality behind these words when expressed is what is truly being communicated and the truth is words are not even needed to express true love.
HI Carola, as you know you are my favourite singer and the quality and vibration of your voice is pure heaven (love) so you are well qualified to say and sing what you have shared.
I loved re-reading this and what occurred to me was that sometimes the words I want to express seem inadequate to what I feel inside about someone.
How lovely to come across your comment and read this blog on 14th August 2018 which is the 25th Anniversary of my marriage to Christoph. You are right there are no words to express the love and appreciation I have for this gorgeous man and what we are able to live and share together not just for us but everyone.
‘Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!’ It is only when we realise that we are already love and feel that in our bodies that we can start to really let go of the needs and wants around being loved by someone else.
When my husband puts the chair in place for me to sit down for each night time meal, I can feel the love in that simple gesture, words are not necessary for in that loving action love is felt within my body.
The more I connect with the love I am and live it, the more I realise that expressing love is more about the way I live than the words I say.
Yes well said – I agree Joshua. I am also experiencing that the more we live in connection to love the more our everyday living is enriched with many moments of communicating and making love.
Sometimes we can be challenged to accept gestures of love. We become unsettled and look to create issues instead of surrendering and going deeper with what is in front of us and accepting that in full, not needing to dull it or play it down.
Isn’t it strange how abuse has become normalised in our society but we are uncomfortable with true love!!!
Sometimes love can be shared in a way that says “I ain’t going to let you continue to be in a low/grumpy mood” simply by someone saying nothing at all but listening.
That raises a GREAT point in that love has many ways to express including pulling us up when we are not in our fullness. Pulling up in this manner is one of the greatest forms of love and one that all too often is resisted and rejected as being not loving!
Yes, love has many ways of expressing, I witnessed this pulling up yesterday, a strong and very clear delivery.
The message delivered in Unimedpedia is one of clarity and truth and realigns so much of what has been put forward as truth in this world
I really love this, it is the gestures in every day life that are so important. When someone shows an act of love in this way, I am deeply touched by it. I recently came home from a trip and someone had a meal cooked waiting for me, exactly how I liked it, this was everything for me, I was deeply touched by it.
Yes I had exactly the same experience last week when Christoph washed, peeled and stir fried a huge batch of spring onions for me to have in the fridge for the week because he knows my eyes sting when I prepare them. I could feel the immense love in how he did it and it made them taste even more delicious.
My three favourite cooking ingredients are love, chilli and lemongrass – with love being the most delicious and nourishing by a long shot.
Every loving expression is worth appreciating in full and this is made possible when we get our ideals, expectations and beliefs out of the way.
Yes, not only do our ideal, expectations and beliefs get in the way but they are not even ours in the first place!
There are a million ways to say I love you without uttering a word, and there are also a million other ways to express love with the openness of our voice and our full beholding of another.
I completely agree although maybe would change it from a million ways to infinite!!! There is no limit to love.
One of the key parts, I reckon, to any relationship, is knowing how the other person understands love in communication. Because this opens up a whole world of intimacy and grace between you, and the opportunity for a new language to be learnt – the language of love in relationship.
Rain has cleared the decks so the love can rain down on us all, and the love that you have shared has rained upon us all, so what a blessing Nicola.
Love is a fascinating subject, and the true meaning should really be understood. And yes, as Nicola expresses to get to the truth of love ❤️ the energetic meaning should be defined. Love is equally expressed to all blood family or not — if you love your mum more than your neighbour it is not love your referring to. You see how vitally important it is to know what love is and what it is not so a One-Unified truth can be grounded.
Part of my job is to visit people in their homes. A lot of the time I am offered a drink. I feel this is something that is very loving and supportive and a way that people welcome me into their home. It’s a very rare event that I don’t feel welcomed and feel at home. We say “I love you” in many different ways and to many many people not just those who we may happen to be in relationship with.
I have also noticed how people might come up to me and say strange things but really they are just trying to find something to say because they are wanting to connect and say hello. If I connect to the intention and what they are really wanting to say and not the words then there is a potential for a lovely connection whereas if I just focussed on the words there would more likely be a disconnection!
I’m blessed to know Christoph and his ways of expressing love are many and varied. They often don’t fit the picture of what society may have dictated is how to say I love you and that is one of Christoph’s great qualities – he doesn’t buy into anything society dictates. He chooses to express qualities in their true form.
I have found that when there is love, there need not even be any action accompanying that love, just the presence is already very substantial.
Yes the presence of love is very substantial indeed – such a beautiful holding energy.
Beautiful Jill and yes receiving is very important and something many of us have more difficulty with. We can’t really “give” love as we all already are love but we can let it out and in so to speak.
Gorgeous sharing Nicola, love comes in many ways and forms, being open to feeling it and accept it brings great joy both to the giver and receiver. I call it love in action when my husband shows me with his loving ways.
After reading this I am curious about the ways in which love can be expressed beyond my pictures of loving gestures.
It can be a presence – your photo is expressing love, just showing your head and your hat.
We can express love when we look into the eyes of another or into our own eyes when we truly see the reflection of ourselves in a mirror.
Yes it is gorgeous to look in the mirror and see love and joy reflected.
It makes sense that something as big as love cannot be contained fully in or only expressed by the words “I love you”, and is expressed by our whole body in many ways including the way someone does the dishes. Thank you Nicola as this has really expanded the expression of love. And if love is who we are, as we learn to live from this energy all of our everyday activities can be done in the expression of love
Nothing is as sexy as a man doing the dishes 😉
Yeah, I completely get this – the over and above feeling that comes when tenderness and care is shown. When no words needs to be spoken, because it is all being expressed through the actions of another. And taken out to a grander scale, as you have done, how incredible would world relations be if countries and religions communicated with each other through their neighbourly activities much more than the words written, spoken and proclaimed.
Love can be expressed in so many ways but how often do we discount the less obvious gestures and leave the other person feeling crushed. So many misunderstandings could be avoided if we were more open about accepting love in all its many and varied forms.
It can be very hurtful to reject caring gestures, but love when truly expressed is complete and does not need or expect anything and therefore is not crushed.
Love is indeed a full body experience that has nothing to do with our thoughts or our needs
It is in the smallest details that the ripple effect of our love for another can be shared.
Nicola I love this blog and the fact it highlights to us the many different ways in which love can be expressed. Also love love love the link to Unimedpedia – now we are talking the real deal.
Loved to read this story again, Nicola. I too have been conditioned in the fact love comes from saying ‘I love you’ and things like buying expensive gifts. I now see that my love can come in many more ways and, the other way around, saying I love you, can be void of love.
I love how you bring a greater depth of understanding of who we are and how we interact with each other. As you have so wisely shared – ‘Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!’ This is such a valuable message for us all to consider. For our words and movements are the end result of a quality of energy we are aligning to, and so words alone are not what is expressing what we are feeling, it is what we are connecting to. When we know love for ourselves first we can feel whenever we are met with the presence of love.
When we express with love and it is rejected eg. not wanting to hear and understand what has been said it becomes clear there is an underlying hurt and they are in reaction. Observing the hurts that arise within me and dealing with them and observing the behaviours others can go into to protect their hurts when love is expressed is helping me to have understanding and therefore less likely to react. It can be very interesting what can play out to dismiss and avoid love.
The essence of Love is the essence of humanity, and the essence of humanity is Divinity… we are Love … we are Divine
Love is endless, boundless and has no limits, its funny how then we can try and box it, and own it missing out on the true glory or real love.
I like that and it is so true – imagine trying to put the universe in a box!
Our loving actions can on so many levels speak volumes of our love for another and the world around us.
It was as clear as day when my husband was lovingly thinking of me and my food choices when I dismissed the love that was on offer. I could feel the rejection in my body because of how I was feeling from choices well before that moment. What was interesting was I had allowed myself to feel it and it stopped me in my tracks!
“The more I am open to love and allow myself to receive it and express it, the more I see it everywhere… in myself, in others and in nature. .” Beautifully expressed Nicola. Being love ourselves, and thus reflecting this out, enables others to be love with us too.
Great blog on love, thank you Nicola, I know I have lived my life thinking that helping, caring, fixing was the way to show love, I feel now how yucky that was, a perversion of what love truly is, “Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!” I don’t have to do love, I can be love and bring it out in my expression of truth harmony joy and stillness in my living.
Loved reading this again. It is true just saying the words ‘I love you’ can be coming without true lived love as well as another gesture could be containing so much love even though it is not the ‘famous’ words being expressed.
I do it all – express it in many ways, looks, movements and gestures and also say “I love you” because that often bursts out of me too 🙂
I love that Nicola ‘burst out of me too’, that is how true love is expressed it so deeply felt that it just bursts out!
Loved reading this article once again Nicola. I too had to relearn that I don’t (or very rarely) have to say I love you but that I express my love in so many different ways. For example in making the bed of my partner in love, with attention to exactly the details as I know she likes them, getting myself out of the way, and respecting and valuing what she wants. And that feels like an absolute joy to do, and therefore is an expression of my love.
Love is always . We just have to keep on opening to it and confirming it as you have here Nicola. It is so simple, the more love we allow the more love we feel.
My husband used to buy me flowers often. I didn’t realise it at the time but it was a way of saying ‘I love you’. The flowers got too much and I asked him to stop buying them! Essentially I realise now what I was actually saying was ‘no more expressing love to me… I can’t handle it!’ The many choices I made to push away love which now I am beginning to embrace and re-imprint.
I’m not really a flower in a vase person so I would probably have let him know and feel that I had accepted and appreciated him, his love and his offering but moving forward gently let him know that I didn’t need any more flowers as he was my flower.
Lovely to read this Nicola, and I have been exploring this very subject myself of late and have come to realise the many little ways in which my husband shows his love without saying the words. Having watched videos on Unimed Living presented by Annette and Gabrielle which have been very helpful, here is the link http://www.unimedliving.com/search?keyword=annette
Beautiful sharing Nicola. What are the words of love if not empty if not embodied and lived?
Gorgeous Nicola. People express love in an infinite number of ways and the more open to receiving the love we are the more likely we are to be able to receive these expressions.
“The more I am open to love and allow myself to receive it and express it, the more I see it everywhere… in myself, in others and in nature. I then start to see more clearly how everyone is pure love in essence, and when not expressing in this way it is because they are in reaction and protecting a hurt or imagined hurt – perhaps even from long, long ago.” Such beautiful understanding about love – thank you Nicola.
The beauty about expressing love is that when times are tough or hard, it then becomes much easier to again express love, or even to express love throughout the tough or hard times.
I love you Christoph and would marry you any day and every day if I was not already married to you… and now that I write this I realise I do actually choose to marry and be married to you every day 🙂 and every day it is a joy to be with you <3
“Love is such a fascinating subject because it is ultimately something we all want but really all already are!” So true Nicola. When we connect to our inner-most essence we can feel we are already all that we were seeking.
Absolutely gorgeous blog Nicola, with a message that is very important. I am in a relationship and I know how easy it can be to choose the reaction instead of understanding and love. Ultimately I feel it is about a choice to accept love in our lives and that we are worth it to be joyful and not bitter, hurt and struggling. Also, to make not our own pictures the most important thing but making it about love and what act will lead to this coming together in love. If that is giving up our picture it is well worth it.
In the past I would probably have baulked at a gesture like this in trying to show that I was capable. However, over the past few years my guard has been lowered and I have been met by some very tender and caring men and this has supported me to accept that I deserve this kind of love so now I would absolutely love and enjoy this type of gesture.
Thank you Nicola for presenting and highlighting that there is a greater depth that Love is communicated by us all if we are open to being aware of it, as the expression of our Love goes far beyond the words we speak when we say ‘I love you’. Our movements carry the degree of Love we choose to live and through our movements we communicate this degree of Love in all we do. The more we surrender to being the Love we are the more we see that this quality of Love is in essence who we all are, and that it is in expressing, appreciating and living this Love that truly enriches our lives.
It’s quite amazing how we limit the depth of love when we use the generic words “I love you”. It’s almost like if these are used then that’s enough, they don’t call us to live the words and be the meaning, just tick the box and go back to whatever you’re doing.
Such a powerful realization to appreciate another’s unique way of expressing those three little words ‘I love you’.
Beautifully expressed Nicola, and this line of yours is a lovely reminder to take into my day ‘It is very joyful to feel and acknowledge the many beautiful ways we can share and receive love with others.’ Very true and I notice the more I appreciate my own and another’s qualities the easier it becomes to remain open and to express this love.
Love can be shared and expressed in so many different ways. When we hold love within ourselves, then this is very easily shared with others. Love can be so much more than words or gestures – but also how we are with someone – how we know their potential and pick them up when they are acting less than this.
Thank you Nicola – we all express love in different ways and we have everything to gain when we choose to be open to this.
You nail this Nicola, when we open up to love and its many forms of expression we get presently surprised yet if we hold on to a belief or picture on how love should be we are ultimately setting ourselves up to fail. I love the inspiration you and your husband give, Thank you.
A fascinating read on how and why we can come unstuck on our expression of love; how one man’s meat is another man’s meaning misinterpretation or understatement when we expect those ‘three little words’ to be delivered in a certain way or when we miscalculate the intention behind a gesture because of the different conditioning we’ve grown up with and the pictures we hold of what good I love you’s are meant to look, sound and feel like.
Expressing love can be done in so many ways, and the example you have chosen to tell us about is a perfect example.
I love returning to this blog because it reminds me of times I have dismissed the love that has been on offer as I have judged the other in some way or allowed an ideal or belief to get in the way. Love is simple and as I open to love it presents itself in more and more ordinary, and sometimes extraordinary ways.
Recently I was reflecting on another’s loving gestures and it wasn’t until another had pointed these out to me that I really started to appreciate how differently we each express love.
It is very easy to misinterpret or miss someone else’s expression of love if we have images and expectations of what love needs to look like.
Loved the sentence ‘the more I am open to love, the more I see it everywhere around me’. It is true, and I do appreciate the steps of opening up more to love that I have taken so far, making me a more loving and humble man.
Gorgeous piece of writing Nicola, loved to read it once again. I am one of those men that expresses love not primarily by saying “I love you”but in the things I do for somebody. And it is not about doing things it is about the quality of love I do it in that makes it enjoyable for me and very loving for the other. Especially for my beautiful partner.
I just love to re-read and re-read your blog Nicola. I can feel the deep truth of the way to truly love. I can recognize in how it is always a choice in ever moment if we go for love or drama. There is this part in us that likes to go in reaction and it avoids to open up for something new ( or like you say we are…so something very known and ‘old’). I love now to have this experiences where I feel I can go in an argument that I choose to go for love and it is so beautiful that it is so ridiculous that even then I have to keep myself wake not to go in the old pattern of drama.
It is very gorgeous to read this again this morning, Nicola. The human gentle touch is such a healing way to express love and to make a deep connection with another. Touch can often cross boundaries that words cannot. This may be in a hug or a gentle touch on the arm or hand. when I am out walking with my husband I often slip my hand into his-no words needed!
Gorgeous Nicola, thank you for sharing such a personal story. Expressing love has to take many and varied ways because it is so multi-dimensional. If we rely on just the words ‘l love you’ to mean somebody loves us, then they will likely feel very flat after a while. Not to say they can’t be said with great meaning, however there is so much to love, how can 3 works capture that every time it is felt. What you describe allows love to deeper and grow, because you recognise more and more of what is love and loving in another. That is profound and important.
Thanks Jenny. Your comment reminded me of a great audio I heard the other day called: Those three little words” ie I love you – and a beautiful quote saying expanding on this. Both can be found here: http://www.unimedliving.com/voice/whats-on-in-the-world/when-you-say-i-love-you-does-it-come-with-love.html
Your story Nicola is very tender and beautiful; such a gorgeous expression of love from your beloved husband.
“What I felt was his humongous love and how he wanted to take care of and protect his precious wife”.
The more I am open to love and allow myself to receive it and express it, the more I see it everywhere… in myself, in others and in nature. So true Nicola, nature has a way of reminding us of our true nature so very beautifully.
Just looking at the two of you and feeling the love and warmth between you is a blessing. Thank you for sharing some of the many ways we can say and receive I love you.