A ‘sea change’ in the modern-day sense is where a person moves from a city or urban location to experience life in a more rural or seaside (hence the ‘sea’ change) location. People choose such a move for many reasons, perhaps because they become restless and crave a change in circumstance, perhaps they feel the pace of the city has become too much and want a simpler life, imagining a life by the sea or by a tree (hence the ‘tree-change’) will offer that simplicity.
I recently read an article in a magazine where the writer felt that her life was fine enough but humdrum: drive the children here, pick up the groceries there, watch telly at night and spend weekends making to-do lists on what needs to be done around the house but never actually doing it. And so she packed up and moved her family to a little island on the other side of the world.
On arrival the location was magical, picture postcard enchanting. Life was simpler, there were far fewer people, many more trees and lots and lots of sea.
But the writer was honest too. While her environment was gorgeous, she still found herself and her husband driving the children here, picking up the groceries there, watching telly at night and spending the weekends making to-do lists that never got done. She was still drooling over images of other people living in other parts of the world and still planning the next vacation or adventure, real or fantastical.
This article struck a chord with me, as while I haven’t made a sea change – I did move to a semi-rural area 2 years ago but that was more to do with logistics than seeking an escape. I have spent an enormous part of my life wishing for and planning holidays, some eventuated, but mostly never even taken. The grass was always greener somewhere else.
I don’t spend nearly as much time these days planning to be somewhere else, but occasionally do find myself trawling travel sites and house swap sites, imagining what it would be like to live ‘not here.’ Which is very interesting because my ‘here’ is absolutely beautiful – that most would consider the ‘greener somewhere else’ place.
What I have come to realise is that when feeling that restlessness that I need to get away, take a holiday or make a sea change, I am wanting to get away from myself. It is actually a disenchantment with my life because of the choices I have been making that I want to run away from. But you can’t run away from yourself and your choices. You can only deal with them (the consequences) and then make your future choices to be more in line with your truth.
Serge Benhayon is a fascinating philosopher who talks about these kinds of things all the time and I once remember hearing him presenting something like if we don’t like the way our relationship is, then don’t just blame the other person or the environment around you, change yourself and your approach in the relationship first and then review and see what happens.
I look at the concept of the sea change like this too – changing our environment in the hope of feeling more settlement with our life won’t work: change who we have become first, then see how life looks like then. Probably much cheaper that way too!
By Suzanne Anderssen
Further Reading:
Is change possible? Understanding the choices we make and why!
Returning to our essence
Are We Taking Responsibility For Our Own Lives?
574 Comments
Finding a reason to change our lot seems like a cop-out, as if we are looking for a get-out-of-jail free card, so that life becomes devoid of a regular rhythm and deepening in the relationships we are in. So when we reverse that, we have an earth change, where we keep our feet on the ground and improve every relationship we have within our community.
We change the wrapping on the parcel as many times as we like but if the contents doesn’t change then nothing really changes.
I love how timely we read these blogs, that there is something there we need to hear. We often look to blame others for relationships, be it family, work, partners etc or how our life is, if only, but the restless comes from inside. When I am settled in myself all the stuff that so call bothers me, doesn’t even cross my mind.
Recently my work has felt a bit…stuck. I couldn’t quite work it out until I stopped and reflected on the whole situation, my contributions included. What I found was that it wasn’t work that’s stuck but me putting the handbrake on in certain instances. As I address why I’ve put the handbrake up chances are high that work won’t feel so stuck.
Learning to Love-ourselves turns the whole world upside down! so maybe we would end up in the ocean on the other side of the world now that would be a see, sea change.
This is very good advice, and makes perfect sense, ‘ if we don’t like the way our relationship is, then don’t just blame the other person or the environment around you, change yourself and your approach in the relationship first and then review and see what happens.’
Suzanne, this stands out for me reading your article this time; ‘ changing our environment in the hope of feeling more settlement with our life won’t work: change who we have become first, then see how life looks like then. Probably much cheaper that way too!’ I have observed that moving abroad or looking for that ‘better place’ to live doesn’t work as we take ourselves with us and so the same issues will be there. Working on our inner world feels key and then making true choices from there.