My relationship with TV started long ago when I was a child and it was only when I stopped watching TV that I realised how all consuming this relationship had been in my life.
I remember the development from viewing childhood and educational learning programs to cartoons, music video shows every Saturday morning, Australian and American sitcoms each evening, movies (that I would watch religiously over and over and over again!) and the gradual progression into reality TV shows, renovation, gardening and cooking programs or documentaries and news on current world events.
TV was my religion; it was a big part of my life as I rarely went a day without watching something. It formed a ritual and a way of living that was religious to me.
In my 20’s, technology made it easier to ensure I never missed an episode of my favourite show and I would record my programs if I was working late or if I went on holidays and needed to catch up as soon as I returned.
Television was my ‘down-time’, my ‘relax-time’ at the end of a busy or emotional day and it was my best friend when something stressful was going on that I certainly did not want to feel. I would arrive straight home from work and turn on the TV, keeping it switched on to help me switch off until that last minute before sleep. Many times I would even stay up longer than I really felt to just to see the climax of the program and how the story would end. I was living my life through the characters on the screen and used the drama and distraction to get me through the day.
The truth is I was religious with a lot of things, not only TV. There were sweets and fast food and the current top hits in music too. I was living in a way that was completely committed and dedicated to these things. I could hold a conversation with another about an episode or repeat all the words from Grease, Mary Poppins or The Simpsons when I was young, but I certainly couldn’t have an intimate or truthful conversation about what was really going on or what I truly felt. Because of this I always felt an emptiness and a lack of self-love within that I worked tirelessly to fill – with TV, stimulation or entertainment and food; most commonly using all at the same time.
I was missing the deeply loving and religious relationship with myself that I knew was possible.
When we consider that the true meaning of Religion is about being in relationship and returning to the love we truly are, these days I live religiously in a very different way. From my choices to bring more self-love into my life, I began to spend more time truly living and not just checking-out from life – I began to live religiously with love and with me.
My life is not about what’s happening on the screen anymore; it’s not about watching fictitious characters live their emotional drama as I watch in suspense and from my own withdrawal, but instead a way of living where I am now living from my own heart’s centre and not through others.
My commitment and purpose is now about living a loving and healthy relationship with me, so that I can bring this quality to others too. This means viewing and bringing an understanding to what is going on for and around me, and choosing to allow my natural awareness to be felt and honoured, instead of trying to shut it out or override it with any form of distraction.
The self-loving way I choose to live now is about cherishing who I am and bringing all of me to everything that I do, where I go, how I am in my relationships with other people and taking care of myself and my body by eating well and making truly nurturing choices. It’s definitely not about checking-out on the couch anymore, with the remote in one hand, TV guide in the other, an unhealthy meal choice in front of me and a rather sluggish approach to life!
TV once dictated how I spent my time – how I spent my evenings with my family, how I planned my day and at what time of night I would eventually go to bed. I based my life around TV rather than true love.
It is now great to be choosing a religious way of life that is not about entertainment value but the true value I feel from appreciating how sensitive and acutely aware I am in my day and thus giving myself the chance to actually feel this and read a situation for what it is. In 2010 I moved home and gave my TV away. It has actually felt natural to let go of a religious way of living that was not truly supporting me or my relationships, making way for an ever-deepening religious way of life that I now have, rich in connection to my knowing, embracing of life and with an openness and love for myself and others.
By Cherise Holt, 33, Brisbane
Further Reading:
Socially Accepted Addictions: What’s Really Going On?
Life is religion. What does that mean?
What is true religion?
668 Comments
A TV remote controller puts you under the control of the illusion of what is on the screen.
I’ve not had a TV for years now. However, I work in peoples homes and most of the time they have a TV. It’s been fascinating to see how attractive and attention-grabbing the programs are. Much like a bug zapper they lure you in but don’t kill you, simply drain your energy. But it’s attractive strength is actually an indication of how much I am connected to myself, not that the TV is more powerful than me.
Addicted or addiction was the way I feel about TV. / movies and I am so glad I have moved on and no longer check out in-front of a screen.
It saddens me to see how many young people are addicted to gaming. Seriously this needs to stop, it must be very detrimental for development.
TV has always been a go to distraction for me and with that I’d have my particular flavour which is sci-fi series or detective drama. But what I realised recently is finding myself thinking about the series in my everyday life. It’s like it’s not just a distraction for the time I watch it but, if I’ve gone into watching a series with the intent to not feel what’s going on in my life I’ve let the doors open for whatever it is I watch to percolate inside of me. I do not want to be with the characters in the series for days, even years later!
People are quite surprised when I say I have never owned a television, I know without doubt my life is much richer and loving because I do not have one.
To have never owned a TV is quite unusual considering how addicted we are to it in the modern world. I have stopped watching TV for many years though, however recently I was recovering from a surgical procedure and wasn’t up to doing very much for the first couple of days post operation, so I chose to watch some TV. What I felt in my body afterwards was quite surprising as I had never felt this before… the only way I can describe it was like a feeling of pollution in my body… it was like a thickness that was on a surface layer.
A great choice that I too have made, I love living in this way, ‘The self-loving way I choose to live now is about cherishing who I am and bringing all of me to everything that I do, where I go, how I am in my relationships with other people and taking care of myself and my body by eating well and making truly nurturing choices.’
I’ve realised how I’ve used TV as a substitute for connection with actual people and myself. It’s such a distraction from being alone with me. I’m learning to be with myself and be aware of all that is around me and the more I do this, the less I watch TV.
It’s really interesting to read this article about TV. I grew up with TV being an everyday part of my life, it was on every evening, all evening. As a young adult I started to feel that it was in fact a waste of my precious time to sit and watch TV all evening and that there were other things I would rather be doing. Now I don’t have a TV and don’t miss it, instead I enjoy catching up on work, playing games with my family or getting ready for bed. I love going to bed easily and not with the TV programme going around in my head and I enjoy not staying up late to find out what happens in a film.
I haven’t watched TV for some time and then did and found that I could not sleep. I kept waking up and then felt drained in the morning – it’s just not worth it. The trouble is it’s so addictive because I kept thinking about the show and when the next episode was on.
Television used to be my best friend when I was lonely. The trouble is I used to look for things to watch that would reflect my mood and then feel worse.
‘I based my life around TV rather than true love.’ If truth is your foundation it takes comfort away.
When we think about it, it’s bizarre to be watching a fictitious story about other people living their lives. The only thing it can provide is escapism from our own lives and a way to not feel our misery.
And social media can be such a distraction too.
Nearly all programs I loved to watch in the past were about making me feel better because the life I had was never as good as what I saw on TV. Mix that in with the emotional stimulation of the news and the escape of the odd cartoon and you have a very hooking and addictive relationship with the TV entirely based on emotional emptiness and need as it is.
To not be ‘hooked’ anymore by the addictive nature of TV has been incredibly liberating, and additionally means there is more time to do things that have a true purpose to them.
I have noticed how the major and all consuming new religion of this era could be said to be the little screen of the mobile phone. As a constant companion, giving us updates and a chance to communicate, it seems to be never far from our hands or our gaze. Perhaps now it is our most worshipped item, but it is worship that does not deliver a divine source from which to understand ourselves and life.
When we religiously turn on the TV or other means of distraction we are wired in to thoughts of others and lose connection to ourselves.
Television is interesting isn’t it because it is soporific as well as stimulating. The quality of our sleep when we fall asleep watching TV or watch a large amount of TV is our own body’s evidence. The question is how willing are we to listen to our body of evidence?
I love how apt the turn of phrase ‘body of evidence’ is!
Distractions are there to be just that, and TV is just one of the many that takes us away from how we are feeling and what we are feeling, it is interesting that anything outside of us that we have a constant relationship with can be looked upon as our religion, when the true meaning of the word is not something outside of us but a reconnection a re bonding to our inner heart, our true essence.
The more we live in this way, the more we inspire and show people that they too can live in a loving and healthy way, ‘My commitment and purpose is now about living a loving and healthy relationship with me, so that I can bring this quality to others too. ‘
What a turn around- TV is so addictive and there has been a massive spike in series – encouraging people to get hooked and buy in to them. So to cut this out is a big deal as it is pretty much an addiction. Your sharing will inspire a lot of people who might be caught up in the hit of the next episode.
One of the definitions of religion is ‘a pursuit or interest followed with great devotion’ which perfectly describes what TV is for so many and how we can make anything into a religion when we are dedicated to finding any distraction that will fill the emptiness of our lack of self-love. Ultimately none of these substitutes ever work and it is only when we choose a religious way of life that is about love that we come to a settlement within ourselves.
The television was also a huge part of my childhood, as it would give me the comfort of companionship that I felt I was missing. And as it had not ever been passed on to me that these relationships with the tv people were not real, that they were fake and so when real life came along and offered me genuine connection with other people, I must admit that I did feel somewhat unprepared.
What we call now religion comes in so many forms… It really does behoove humanity to return to the true essence of this word
I feel that television is more like a drug than a religion because it is so addictive. When there is a screen on anywhere it can be quite difficult to ignore it. I remember times when I have been having a conversation with someone and the tv is on, even though the sound might be switched down so it cannot be heard, the lights flashing on the screen seem to call out for our attention and act as a constant distraction.
Its a weird feeling to be living life through a vicarious pleasure of watching another (pretend or real) on TV. Pure escapism it allows us to be rich, poor, super hero, villain. Whatever tickles our fancy but ultimately takes us away from ourselves.
“TV, keeping it switched on to help me switch off” When we realise that this is the attraction of TV and screens, we have to stop and question what are we switching off from?
It is sadly convenient that we have bastardised the word religion, and associated it only with going to church, or institutionalised religions, which most of us have a massive reaction to. As with this we dismiss the fact and the responsibility that there are many points of our lives that are lived religiously, such as what you have shared with watching TV as one example. Yet is what we are religious with offering us evolution, or de-evolution? Is what we are religious with deepening our connection to who we are, our Soul, and living with greater love, harmony and awareness of our universality? Such is the true meaning of religion and all that is has to offer us if we are willing to be open to the truth of how we are really living and the impact it has on us and our evolution as a humanity.
Great questions Carola prompting us to take responsibility for what we are choosing.
I know in myself too that if I withdraw in any way from being fully me, from bringing my all to life then there is a feeling of dis-ease or a lack/ emptiness… Having the clarity of this presented by Serge Benhayon and how to truly fill ourselves back up comes from inside of us is priceless.
We choose to get hooked by TV as a convenient distraction from many things and especially when we want to avoid feeling what our body is truly communicating and feeling.
Yes, so very true. Remove the distractions that dull us and the truth of what we are feeling will guide us to freely live who we are.
Oh dear, I think on that basis we are religious about so many things that are not related to God! (the most readily accepted word connected to religion) If we apply your logic then we have to include sport, food, socialising, pretty much every addiction we can think of! However, to consider that our relationship with ourselves could have that same level of commitment and dedication has a wonderful expansive feeling in my body, so it is time to consider the rituals that would be part of that religious commitment and build a new foundation.
There is a really interesting cross reference here Lucy…. if you were to ask an avid football fan if sport was their religion I suspect you would get a positive response, equally I suspect that it would meet the criteria of addiction as well!