Just last week I shared an email conversation with a friend in which, amongst other things, I asked how they were, and in return they did the same. Normally part of me would say I am amazing, which I am, but I would never really be completely honest or truth-full. I would say a version of what I was feeling but hold back from sharing in full, or say what I thought I should be saying, what another wanted to hear, or feel that I had to be a certain way – in other words, I found it difficult just being me.
But there was something this morning that made me stop and ask myself: “how am I really feeling?” This gave me the space to really feel how I was, how my body was feeling, and not what my head was telling me I should feel. To my lovely surprise I wasn’t feeling flat or down, yes I was feeling physically tired, but with this I felt amazing, joyful and so lovely and delicate.
So rather than simply replying that I’m great or amazing, I thought, you know what, I am going to be completely honest and share in full how I’m really feeling. In doing so, this then allowed for me to open up to share how I was really feeling about everything else too, with no need for it – or myself – to be a certain way, and no need to worry about what another may think or say: it felt amazing! My body felt gentle, open and loving; there was no effort, tension or thinking, just the simplicity, honesty and loveliness of just being me and expressing in full.
The reply that came back simply confirmed that true blessings do happen every single day; it made me smile a huge heartfelt smile from inside out. My friend shared how it felt great to hear me talk about how I really am in full without hiding or holding back on what I really felt, and from that they opened up and shared in full how they were really feeling too.
It was simply beautiful just being me, and goes to show the true magic, beauty and openness that can be found when we choose to be completely honest and truth-full, sharing in full how we really are feeling, and with that it allows others to feel, be open and express how they really are feeling, in full too.
Inspired by the presentations of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.
by Gyl Rae, Student and Waitress, Scotland
811 Comments
It is a very loving thing to give ourselves moments during the day to be honest with how we are feeling. We are so used to overriding what we feel that we even try to convince ourselves that everything is great and we have become masters at pretending.
It is never ever worth lying to ourselves. Ever. And I mean never ever. The harm and delayment of our evolution that results is never worth it. Ever.
The magic in being open is that it allows us and others to be truly transparent about where we are at which is an awesome confirmation and celebration for all.
Being completely honest always starts with self, when we are honest with ourself, how we truly feel, then we can share this with others.
The foundation of true expression is honesty and this is a great place to start.
The more we get real and honest about how we’ve been living our lives, the richer and more expansive life feels. Not being honest with ourselves about our own choices makes it near-impossible to move forward, because it means we’re not willing to see or take full responsibility for our choices and their consequences – and if we’re not willing to do that, there’s no learning, because we’re stuck in the arrogance of thinking we’re ‘right’ and don’t need to change.
I like what you share here Bryony, if we are not honest with ourselves, the choices we make and the consequences of these then we stay stuck in the same old patterns, ‘it means we’re not willing to see or take full responsibility for our choices and their consequences – and if we’re not willing to do that, there’s no learning, because we’re stuck in the arrogance of thinking we’re ‘right’ and don’t need to change.’
It’s like we had to relearn how to be honest… To express with that deep commitment to truth
We set the level of how we communicate with others in how we are with ourselves and the more willing we are to be deeply honest and feel and share who we are without censure the more we open up to people and the more they open up to us. This is how we embrace transparency, how we show each other who we are and the divinity we all come from and share.
It’s amazing what doors open when we start to be completely honest.
Expressing how we feel is revitalising and rejuvenating, and as I write this now, I feel that is because our bodies light up when we connect to another on an energetic level. When we hold back, settle for surface, polite and nice conversations, it feels incredibly draining and numbing, because it’s like we’re using an enormous amount of force to either block the connection that we so naturally, effortlessly feel, with others, or to not feel the lack of connection. This lack of connection happens not because we are not all naturally connected, because we are, but because of all of the layers, like protection, not wanting to feel vulnerable etc, that we put over the top of that natural connection.
Just being able to stop is an enormous boon… I had privilege of teaching at a supposedly very rough high school recently… Hundred and 50 kids ranging from years 7 to 12, were able to be all of them, in stillness… It was amazing feeling. one of the teachers commented that it felt so normal!
I realise that I am more okay to share when I am not doing well with others but when I am doing well I hold this back because I don’t want to make others feel uncomfortable. I am learning that this just caps myself and also robs others of an important reflection.
Recognising this pattern too and my discomfort with how others may react if I share how amazing I am feeling.
‘My body felt gentle, open and loving; there was no effort, tension or thinking, just the simplicity, honesty and loveliness of just being me and expressing in full.’ And there is nothing else our body wants more expressing of what lives inside.
When we are honest with ourselves we are not trying to fool anyone and this allows everyone else to do the same.
Recently having made the choice to always share honesty how I am really feeling, I have notice that when I do this, that I usually receive a more honest reply to my question of how are you feeling? Which shows me the power of true reflection.
The more we surrender to honesty and being ourselves we then often give others the permission to feel the same through our actions and words. What a gift to the world and a marker of our global responsibility.
It is so gorgeous to just be ourselves and most people really enjoy it too as it gives them permission to be their gorgeous selves. Makes it even crazier how often we are not ourselves and how exhausting and silly it is to try and be anyone else!!!
Holding back our true reflection is never going to serve us or anyone else, so let all we are be in all we do so the love we are is fully expressed.
‘I would say a version of what I was feeling but hold back from sharing in full, or say what I thought I should be saying, what another wanted to hear, or feel that I had to be a certain way – in other words, I found it difficult just being me.’ Reading this sentence explains the complexity we go into when we all don’t share the truth of who we are. We have build a complete society build around this, how exhausting to feel.
When we express how we truly feel we create space for our relationships to deepen and for intimacy to become part and parcel of our connections.
The deliverance of being all that we are is a gift to the world, through which inspiration is offered as we reflect the light of who we all are in essence, that which we are here to live.
Seems like a great recipe for relationships you have shared here Gyl. The funny thing about not expressing how we feel in full detail is that we are afraid to expose some weakness or failure but the reality is everyone else is experiencing the same feelings!
For so many people, simply knowing how they truly feel is a very big step.
So very true Chris, and it is very supportive and inspiring for us when we see in others that feeling, honoring and expressing our truth, is actually very natural and liberating for us.
This evening when my husband and I were walking together, I could feel a contentment in myself and it felt awesome to share and feel that my whole day was one of letting go of control and instead let my day unfold, very simple and it opened me up to be more of who I am.
When we express how we truly are, it opens up conversational pathways that for most people, are never walked down.
Thank you Gyl. I very much feel how I choose to be distracted more than to express how I feel. I blame the distraction to not express how I feel when I choose to leave myself first. Choosing to leave myself is not appreciating how much love I feel, and have not expressed.
So often we put up a fascade of how we are, even to ourselves, we don’t often stop enough to clock how we are really feeling about things, so when someone does ask, sometimes we may not even be fully aware ourselves. I know when people first started asking me how I felt, I didn’t know as I had denied my own feelings for so long.
When I connect with my body and not what my head thinks is going on it can be a lovely surprise. It can also be a moment to clock how I’ve let myself bring in anxiety because I wasn’t connected with myself. The key for me is to stay with my body and trust it’s ability to restore harmony.
Allowing people to truly see you by being honest, invites others in to do the same and seems to result in more intimacy naturally. Obviously, it does not mean we spill our guts to everyone we meet but it does mean we move in a way that is honest with everyone we meet. If we are feeling cheeky, make a joke, if your feeling sensitive, move with extra care. When I say move, this movement might be the way that you are typing or the way we you are standing or speaking on the phones, honesty is not always words, it can be action and stillness too.
Yes, honesty to me is not something I do, but the way I am with myself: am I listening to what I need, to what’s needed, or overriding it and going with ideas and pictures of what I think or have already decided is needed, without connecting first?
Thanks to Universal Medicine I feel so much more at ease in being honest with what I am feeling. It allows conversations to be far richer and deeper rather than flitting around the surface of “I am fine thank, you?” Or moaning or talking about the weather.
It is very freeing when we open up and share at a deeper level, not only for ourselves but also for those we are opening up to as we are allowing more of our true selves to be seen which
in turn allows them to do the same.