Recently I went on a trip to London which included a lot of traveling on the London Underground. Besides the difficulties of finding my way on the underground, with all the different directions and colours, I had an extra challenge which was my suitcase: although it was a small suitcase, I couldn’t carry it up or down the stairs due to a physical condition I was experiencing. I had no other choice other than to ask for help as I needed people to help me carry my suitcase up and down the stairways. In case you have never travelled on the London Underground… believe me there are a lot of stairs. I decided to make it simple – every first man I saw, I would ask for help.
It was beautiful that every time I needed someone to help me, there was a man passing by who was very willing to carry my suitcase up or down the stairs.
Then on my way back at the end of the day when it was darker and I was feeling tired after an intense but very beautiful day, I was standing with my suitcase needing to get downstairs to my platform but there was nobody around to help me. I was waiting patiently but nobody showed up. Then after about 5 or 10 minutes standing there alone (which didn’t feel so comfortable) some people came from behind, not just one, but eight men of African origin, all walking in a way that appeared very macho and aggressive and, to me, they felt like a gang. None of them seemed to have any plan to start smiling and, by all appearances, they looked like tough guys.
“Wow” was what came up… I felt some tension rising up in me! I heard myself saying to myself; “Sylvia, you will do what you did all day, you will ask the first man you meet for support. You won’t avoid this gang now; they are your fellow brothers. It is like discrimination not to ask. You will not play this game; you will ask one of these men for support. You won’t go into fear and you will stay very present and just be you.”
In the front of the gang walking up the steps was what appeared to be gang leader. He looked the most macho and for sure, it felt like he did not plan to smile. All the others followed him. So I made the step and asked: “Sorry sir, can I ask you something? Can you bring my suitcase downstairs because…” and before I was able to finish, I felt aggression coming up towards me and there was an attitude that indicated he wouldn’t do that for me because that was not cool, especially in front of the other gang members. He started to shake his head with a “No” and I felt the gang coming closer and there I stood… I felt I was about to go into contraction from fear, but I chose to stay with me.
Suddenly something beautiful happened. I could clearly feel that this man was simply reacting from a carried hurt, a hurt that as a humanity we are all responsible for. The hurt of the discriminations of the past. I saw and felt the image of slavery, how he was thinking that I, as a white woman, thought that it was normal to ask a black man to carry her stuff. As if he was less.
I felt the part I, and everyone else had played, when the unexpressed truth of what we did as a collective – by not speaking out and condemning slavery – and how that has hurt our brothers and ourselves equally so. I felt very touched feeling all of this, accepting that this is what we have all created and understanding that it will take all of us to heal this hurt. All this awareness happened in a few seconds.
And from that awareness I looked at him and said “It is because I cannot carry the suitcase easily with my physical limitation, so it would be great if you can support me here with my suitcase.”
I could feel the aggression in his body melting away; not because of what I was saying, but from the true place I was saying it from. There was this inner feeling of deep respect for this man. I had truly connected with him and the beauty that he naturally is. I felt very humbled and I felt only deep love for all these beautiful men, and I could feel how this particular man kind of ‘radar scanned’ me on the energetic quality I was coming with. I could feel that he was touched by the fact that I had no reaction towards his imposing aggression towards me. He could feel my equalness and non-judgment. For me it was just about connecting and opening my heart wide. In a second his behaviour totally changed.
He looked at me, nodded his head confirming he would do it: no words were needed, the nodding of his head while looking straight at me was so beautiful, all was in his eyes – the trust, the understanding, the connection, the commitment and by that the true support.
He suddenly felt like my best friend who would do anything for me. He carried my suitcase down, and the others followed close. You could clearly see that they were impressed that he had changed his mind. Coming down he just gave me the suitcase, no words, but Wow there was no need for words… ALL was ‘said’.
I have learned so much from Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine. I have learnt that life is not all about me, my stories or my needs. That it is about truly starting to care for myself and others: to make life about everyone and not about fulfilling my needs… to feel the huge love and wisdom in me and to connect with the same essence in others. In doing so I have noticed I am reawakening a deeper understanding for myself and others. We all carry stories, we all carry hurts and we have created all of them. No one is more, or less, responsible.
No matter our skin color, religion, nationality or gender, we are all equal Sons of God re-turning to the love we all come from. It begins with holding ourselves in the love and care again for each other, and instead of judging, to be more understanding and loving towards ourselves, and others. When we start with expressing true love and acceptance of everyone we meet, then we can truly connect with them. Only then will we return to a true and harmonious way of being.
By Sylvia Brinkman, people manager and practitioner (esoteric healing modalities), Amstelveen
Further Reading:
Refugees
Seeking Connection and True Relationships
Accepting all of you
493 Comments
Magic happens when we connect to another in equalness.
“Suddenly something beautiful happened” A beautiful opportunity you offered to each one of those men that there is power in being sensitive with another, whoever they are.
And also, that healing is not something that needs to take place in a clinic or practice room but it can happen in mere seconds in any encounter and any place.
Absolutely and the more we open up to others the more we allow for healing to happen.
beautiful Sylvia and such a deep reminder of how we all carry the same essence and the deep healing that takes place when we are met in this essence, no matter how much protection there may be.
I love this blog Sylvia, there is a joy every time I read it. The power of true connection, non-judgement and understanding are a powerful mix and when standing in front of it, its melting. You may well have changed something in this young man forever, he got to feel and trust another human being that he did not know.
Wow, to feel the hugeness of what is shared here, that each and every one of us has contributed to the hurts we all feel and that in each moment in how we are, how we approach each other, how we hold ourselves and others in that moment we offer another way to be with each other, a true, a loving and an equal way, a way of harmony and a way to the brotherhood we naturally are.
I love reading this blog. The idea of being alone on a platform at night with a group of men is not one most women would want to experience. Feeling and understanding where other people are at is such a gift to humanity and brings us back to oneness instead of us all going into our separate reactions and hurts.
Just beautiful Sylvia. How you changed the whole scenery by practicing love, observation and understanding.
So beautiful to read Sylvia, by staying connected to your body you were able to connect to another human being with true understanding love and equality, reflecting to the other the love that resides within. Indeed a magic moment.
Thank you Sylvia this brings the space of who we are and what we are capable of bringing – right through all the ideals and beliefs that we might hold, that keep us away from love, loving eachother, respecting eachother, living in brotherhood with eachother and working together. This example reveals all of this so beautifully.
This is definitely a wow moment Sylvia; a life-changing life lesson on the London Underground. And it is so very clear that if you had gone into judgment the outcome would have been very different and all of you would have missed out on this moment of potential change.
A beautiful example of supporting another to not carry their burdens of hurt.
” We all carry stories, we all carry hurts and we have created all of them. No one is more, or less, responsible. ”
This is very true, challenge is to let go of the protection of the personal hurts, then the realisation of responsibility will drop in.
A wise beautiful woman named Sandra told me recently that ‘people love to support others’ and I had never really thought of it like that. I have always been there to support others but found it difficult to ask for myself – until that day that is.
Beautiful Sylvia all those discriminatory acts can all be eliminated by connecting to your essence. It’s a classic parable that will stand the test of time with man.
It is amazing how much we know and feel in everyone around us. Often we feel and sense far more than we realise. When we give voice to what we truly feel from our body within our inner heart, that’s when things really start to change in human life!
True connection with self first helps support building connection with others, and as you say Sylvia all with an open heart and no judgement, ‘When we start with expressing true love and acceptance of everyone we meet, then we can truly connect with them.’
Judgement is debilitating in relationships and also in possible relationships-to-be when we first meet someone – this might look like avoiding them or being a certain way with them/reserved because of the expectations we’ve attached to their image. The reality can be so different, but we can also inspire anyone with a high quality of care, listening and respect no matter what their background might be.
I love that you had committed to ask the first man you saw in every situation and you were presented with all sorts of situations that challenged any ideals or beliefs about what that would look like. We are, as you say, all the same, yet we often wear our hurts and scars on our sleeve which creates an outside shell of protection. Time to change the scars for hearts and give life, love and each other another opportunity by being that change ourselves, lovingly and consistently.
I will be travelling in a few days and will need assistance with a small suitcase as I have a recovering frozen shoulder on my left side and a new tennis elbow on my right side. I have asked for assistance before when travelling with my frozen shoulder, but this takes it to a whole new level. Letting go of my independence and letting people see quite how fragile and delicate I am.
Supporting one another, whether we are friends, family or strangers is a part of us all living together on this planet, regardless of race, religion or culture.
Re-reading my own story once again I feel the beautiful marker of a magic moment which can be thousands for all of us if we open
to each other with just the observation and love and understanding. Then God reveals himself to us with clarity and love in the interaction between people.
I really love this sharing as I can feel that I often change myself based on how I ‘think’ others will receive me and through this I often harden my body and I can feel that this then communicates a rejection to others when in truth I am scared of rejection but that is then what I project and do to others.
Sylvia, it is inspiring to come back to your story and see what an impact it has to simply hold who we are in the world. Thank you
It’s always such a deeply touching blog to read, thank you Sylvia. Today reading I became more aware of the collective hurts we have all contributed to, the way we don’t speak up being one such way, even if we didn’t actually do the action such as slavery, we are a part by doing nothing. It’s part of responsibility to acknowledge this. I can see also how your acknowledgement of this was part of what changed the interaction with the young man.
Thank you Melinda. The magic is there when we read the situations and not have any judgement but just understanding. It feels like it opens a space where the divine can touch our hearts to feel the union once again.
We can all feel when someone is holding us as an equal or not and we have a choice to react to this and add more injury to the wounds we all carry, or we can choose to respond with love and bring a greater understanding and equality to every relationship we are in.
Yes Andrew, we can be the change we want to see and not wait for others to be that first.
A simple smile makes a world of difference in the day when we feel the levels of protection we can all walk around with. I have often found that this simple gesture can make mine and someone’s day.
By understanding that we all carry past hurts into the present it helps us to not take things so personally when people react around us.
“When we start with expressing true love and acceptance of everyone we meet, then we can truly connect with them. Only then will we return to a true and harmonious way of being.” So true Sylvia
Having got caught up in the wild fires in Portugal this week it felt amazing how everyone came together to support one another – with true open-heartedness. All barriers removed.
The power of love when we are open to it has the power to transcend all that is not of love, creating space for more of what is true to be brought forth.
Beautifully shared Carola, the exact words I needed to read today!
Beautifull. When we let go of judgement, fear, protection, assumption, expectations and stay true to ourselves with a willingness to be open and truly connect with another love is instantly there as it always is.
The beauty of true connection – no words needed.
It’s really beautiful how sometimes we see ourselves in difficult situations in which we need people’s support, and how much can happen in those encounters when we open ourselves to them. By holding others in the same love that we hold for ourselves, miracles like this become the most healing and natural things in our everyday life.