Only quite recently have I become aware that I used my mind to protect myself from letting people into my life.
I’ve been a master at saying things that I thought sounded great and really sophisticated, but they were not coming from a heartful place, rather they were designed to keep people away. In other words, I didn’t really want to connect with people and show who I truly was on the inside. It was quite ‘effective’ and very few, if any, dared to question me; which sounds quite horrible when I say it like that, but that’s how it was. It feels quite ‘yuk’ and it also leaves you in a state where you are quite lonely.
However, this is slowly changing and it feels as if I’m shifting something big here. It feels as if I’m on the cusp of a new era for me in how I relate to others.
I’m willing to let go of the protection I have had around people and I’m willing for others to enjoy me for who I truly am, in all the imperfections that I have – however, not making them the focus, because I am pretty awesome when I allow myself and others to feel it.
So you could say that I’m slowly shifting myself from being mind driven to becoming more impulsed by my heart, and the (not so funny thing actually) is that having been mind driven for a long time takes a toll on your body and can leave it quite empty and vacated.
It’s as if you leave for holidays and you forget that your flowers need watering and you come home and they are all not looking so great. Sorry for the dramatic picture, but that’s how it is in a way. The mind doesn’t nurture the body but the heart definitely does. So the heart incorporates the whole body, while the mind is pretty much just interested in itself. Like having a staff meeting, but the boss has not invited the rest of the staff. No real joy and harmony happening there, is it?
So the heart, the precious heart, incorporates in all its humility, the whole body, which we could say is a whole body intelligence, whilst the mind brings with it a mind that is full of itself, or it could be translated to being mind-full. So mindfulness is not the big saviour everyone tends to think it is: heart-fullness, on the other hand, is. It could be likened to having presents on your birthday – one gives you everything you’ve ever dreamed of and beyond, and the other brings you an empty box, or at best, presents from your last birthday.
Said with a newly found appreciation for how important it is to have a love filled relationship with my body, which as a result, brings true intelligence. For what intelligence is intelligent, if it leaves the body in a mess?
By Matts Josefsson, Student of Behavioural Science, Stockholm, Sweden
Vulnerability: opening the way for healthier relationships
Learning to Find Me and Live My Life
The Body’s Intelligence
Feeling the flow of love in and out from our body is the In-breath and Out-breath of God.
I am coming to the understanding that we are vessels and that there are only two energies to align to. God and the universe – co creation or Astral – creation.
If this is true and I have been on a long journey of discovering this myself to be true then what energy are we aligning to? From the state of humanity I would say Astral – creation as we have collectively made a society that is abusive, hard, selfish, brutal, the list is long and all very unpleasant. But where has aligning to this energy got us as a collective? Add to the list we are now extremely sick so much so if it wasn’t for the amazing healthcare system we have put in place a huge majority of the population would be dead. To me our healthcare system is propping our society up.
What if we were instead taught how to align to God and the universe not by going to church and being submissive but by reconnecting to what we innately knew as children, by staying in touch with our sensitivity and gentleness. When we reconnect back to this energy it is then impossible to harm another. Isn’t this what we are all deep down craving?
Inner-heart-full-ness, Essence / Soul takes our lived wisdom to a deep level of understanding and brings a purpose to all we do in the most Loving way possible, and thus we feel the innate nature of who we are.
As with anything when the mind is in control we miss out on the magic and wonder of life.
Anonymous I agree with you and as Matts writes in his blog
” that having been mind driven for a long time takes a toll on your body and can leave it quite empty and vacated.”
Is this why we look to others to love us in the emotional sense rather than filling ourselves up with the love that is naturally within us and doesn’t have an ounce of emotional love in it? Is it possible that we have been educated to believe that emotional love is the answer when in fact it is the complete opposite of who we truly are which is why we are empty and vacated.
This is again the support that is there with Universal Medicine which is another way to look and live in life
‘I’m willing to let go of the protection I have had around people and I’m willing for others to enjoy me for who I truly am, in all the imperfections that I have – however, not making them the focus, because I am pretty awesome when I allow myself and others to feel it.’
When we let go of the protection that we build as armour plating magical things occur such as feeling the delicacy of how we truly are when we allow ourselves to feel the beauty in each other.
Indeed Mary and letting the love we have in our hearts out is the greatest form of “protection” if we can use that word for it.
“Letting people” in is simple when we understand that by being open in this way we are being Truly intimate (not sexual) with them and we can not have intimacy without true appreciation, and being appreciative is the most Loving way comes with confirmation of ours and everyone/things divinity in essence.
There are so many analogies here about compartmentalising without considering the impact on the whole and it is clear that if we do not consider ourselves part of a greater whole and that what we contribute to that whole matters, we will not consider any of these analogies as odd – just normal and better than what we had before.
Thank you Matts, when we understand how we can appreciate our body we have let it go and are finding our foundation in reconnecting to our impulses from our heart.
What a powerful realisation Matt’s in this I can see how it is really so simple to be love, show love and express love – it is our natural way. Anything that takes us away from this is totally unneeded complication.
And also comes with the comparison that so complicates our lives.
Beautiful Matts; ‘I’m willing to let go of the protection I have had around people and I’m willing for others to enjoy me for who I truly am, in all the imperfections that I have.’
What a lovely choice and commitment to make for yourself, I have likewise made the choice to be present and in my body, ‘shifting myself from being mind driven to becoming more impulsed by my heart’.
“Let it go, let it be” lyrics from one of my Michael Benhayon songs – words with much wisdom.
When we let go and not control with our head, life becomes magical in every single way.
Being mind-driven is something, I think, (pun intended) we can all relate too. Knowing that we can source life from a different place (the heart and being impulsed from there) is like switching on a different source inside us. From the outside it might look similar, but feels a whole different ball game inside.
Since being aware of what you are sharing Rachel I have observed people more and more who come from their mind, or who are invested in the intellect how very much they can feel disconnected from their bodies. They literally look and feel like heads on a withdrawn physicality. The feeling of someone who is very present in their bodies is totally different; there is a presence there that is warm, vital and inviting, not withered and ailing.
The Deep-Humble-Appreciative-Ness that can only come from a reconnected body is a part of our whole body intelligence. And with appreciation being such a gracious part of who we are in our most divine aspect as we feel the upmost for all of those whom we come in connection with.
Thanks for sharing Matts, being mind driven feels complicated and leaves our body tense and exhausted. From my experience when I live from my body and am not stuck in my head then life feels simple and joyful.
The mind is cold and heartless I know from experience it doesn’t care for the body at all, the lies, deceit and sheer willfulness all come from the mind. I know this to be true because the inner heart only knows how to be love and how to express in a way that is non harming.
“The mind doesn’t nurture the body but the heart definitely does.” I love this. So simple, but so true. But staying in connection with our hearts we allow ourselves to feel what the body needs to support it to be vital and vibrant. Living from the mind simply keeps the body going and pushes it often beyond its natural rhythms, which in turn can lead to all sorts of unnecessary and avoidable health problems.
I was observing a woman jogging yesterday – the pain she felt was so clear from the expression on her face and yet you could also palpably feel and see the mind driven push of her run. She clearly believed that pushing her body past its limits would bring her benefit. When we fail to honour what the body is sharing we are only setting ourselves up for its breakdown later down the track.
Matts, I am really realising the importance of having a relationship with my body – taking care of my body and staying present in my body, this feels key.
One day we will shift from being lost in the fog of our minds to residing in the clarity of the body. The more that I choose to connect to my body the simpler life becomes. Not in a mundane way but in a rich and rewarding way. I am getting to truly understand that by handing life over to my body, I am actually handing things over to the intelligence of the universe. I am experiencing very practical examples of how when I am seemingly bound by the small and limited confines of my mind that if I surrender to my body then it seems that it will often lead me straight to what’s needed.
I feel you are spot on here Alexis Stewart
‘we think we are bound by the small and limited confines of our minds’
When actually if we can let go of all that we have been taught and instead as you say surrender to our hearts, we are given the access to the entire universe which has always been our birth right.
Isn’t it amazing how much promoting there is for the mind to be the ruler of our hearts, when the mind can be a dark and desolate place, whereas the heart never ceases to love.
Yes, very interesting and yet the mind is rarely open to the possibility that it might have got it wrong because then it would have to admit it is not it. Sadly it often takes a blunt reminder of our intransigence to bring it to an awareness that the body is what we need to nurture and that it never lies to us.
Mmmm this is a big one isn’t it. I am sure a lot of people can relate to this … I certainly can! ‘I didn’t really want to connect with people and show who I truly was on the inside.’ I am starting to do this more and more (let people see the true me and let people in) but can still feel I need to let go even more of the energetic barriers I have put up to keep people out fall away. What I am feeling as well is am I prepared to be truly deeply loved as there has been part of me within where I have not fully accepted this.
Appreciation of our own divine connection and the ensuing ever-expanding realisations with everything/one is in essence from God, develops a Truly-intimate relationship (letting people in) that opens our acceptance channels in the most Loving ways.
I can relate to all that you have shared Vicky, I can still feel that there is a part of me that I have not fully accepted, can I be this grand and can I be this powerful. There is a part of me resisting this because it knows once I fully embrace all that I am, it no longer has control over me and this energy is all about control and it want to be in full control of me. We battle ourselves and our divineness, how crazy is that?
We can be extremely good at coming up with all the ‘right’ words to make it sound like we’re being open, friendly, nice and polite, when in fact we’re hiding behind these words and using them as a wall of protection. Understanding who we truly are and having the courage to just be ourselves can only come with a lived consistent connection to our body and what we can feel. To be ourselves means to know and love ourselves.
And being ourselves means to know and love ourselves, this is the foundation to then love all others equally so because we know the evil that comes though us and is not us but we have allowed an energy to come through our bodies which acts out the evil. It is our responsibility to close the door where evil dwells.
Our bodies are always asking us to be more, our cells deep down know we are all one, it is the brain run by the sprit that keeps us in behaviours that are always separate to the whole.
And the beautiful thing about letting people into our life is that we open ourselves up to meeting new people perhaps people we wouldn’t have normally socialised with and we learn to develop relationships that once were uncomfortable and thought impossible. In letting go of the protection we begin to make life about people first.
‘So mindfulness is not the big saviour everyone tends to think it is: heart-fullness, on the other hand, is.’ I don’t know mindfulness very well, the only thing I observe is that it seems to be a hype and the answer on all our woes but we have to care for our entire body and let our inner heart lead the way as there is where our true intelligence is based.
Yes you can be a mindful drug addict but it doesn’t help the body to be the temple of love we need to feel the harmony we all are looking for.
Recently I realised that even though I thought I was more in my body and heart than in my mind the opposite was true. The mind is very good at getting the attention on everything and anything other than our body and heart even if the thoughts ‘sound good’ and loving it can still be coming from and ideal or belief of what is good and what is not good. The other this I found is that it is a constant deepening in being more and more present with our heart and body. There is no end in this.
I agree, what was once a pretty decent level of being aware and connected with our body becomes yesterdays news when we deepen even more. Like you say, there is no end to it, only a forever deepening.
This is a great sharing Matts because it feels to me that what you are sharing is that just like there is no end to the universe there is no end to us that we can deepen into the universe as it holds us all in immeasurable love.
I too had an example recently where I thought I was more in my body, only to be shown I had abandoned my body and escaped into my head, ‘I realised that even though I thought I was more in my body and heart than in my mind the opposite was true.’
True intelligence and a love filled way of living and being in and from our body and with others from there is beautiful and a real offering of the different choices we can make and the choosing of love innately that we all are.
This sounds all to familiar – using the mind and being fooled by thoughts that when we stop to read them truly from the body are not ours.
Its so funny how we can calculate with our minds what we should say and sum up how we can get someone on side when in reality when this happens, everyone loses out.
Yes and the beautiful thing is that even before we open our mouth everyone has already felt how we are and what intent we come with so we cannot really lie, only get confused when someone says something that doesn’t correspond with what we feel they are really saying.
Matts what you are sharing is so true when we listen with our bodies we cannot be lied to because our bodies can feel the change in vibration that a lie produces. When we tune into our bodies life because so much clearer and very simple.
There is nothing more real and true than when we share from our hearts, from the truth of our bodies and our lived wisdom. And when we are ourselves in this way I find the joy supersedes anything that changing who I am to fit in or to be accepted offers.
Totally agree with you Carola.
Yes and others don’t hear it or feel it in the same way. There is an ease and a settlement that knows a truth has been spoken, it may be your truth rather than my truth at that time, but there is a knowing that it is the truth from your body and your lived experience.
Carola Woods I love what you have shared because I went swimming recently and discovered as I swam that there was a joy within me that I hadn’t felt before and as you say this feeling of joy supersedes anything that changing who I am to fit in or to be accepted offers. The feeling is so exquisite but it’s not mine to hold on to but to be shared with whomever I meet or have a conversation with so that everyone gets to feel what it is like to live with joy in our hearts.
Using mind driven intelligence at the expense of the body is a very effective way of protecting our hurts, as in the arrogance it generates it tells others that we are superior and that there is nothing you can have over us. The investment we have in being perceived as intelligent keeps us from feeling the innate love and wisdom we all naturally hold and can all naturally express.
Its so crazy the amount of stories we tell ourselves that give us the perfect excuse not to connect, unfortunately the whole world is suffering because there is too much story telling and not enough feeling.
Quite astounding to admit that if we, and that includes me as well, talk from our head, we actually keep people away.
Great to re-visit this blog Matts – letting go of protecting the heart in order to let love out and share who we are with the world and then allowing others in is key in our return to the truth of who we are – LOVE .
“So you could say that I’m slowly shifting myself from being mind driven to becoming more impulsed by my heart, and the (not so funny thing actually) is that having been mind driven for a long time takes a toll on your body and can leave it quite empty and vacated”.
Beautiful to come back to this blog, thank you Matts. There is a real call here to come back to a heart centred way of living where we listen to the body, love and appreciate ourselves and let go the dictates of the mind.
Matts your sharing is like a loving invitation to feel my body again. It brings me to understand that the first step to open up my heart to others is doing it to myself first. The best gift that I can ever receive now. Thank you
I love this Matts how when we surrender to our imperfections and accept them we can then allow others in to Love and Appreciate all of who we are too. As opposed to trying put on the best part of who we are.
We can be pretty good at fooling ourselves and others that ‘we’re connecting’ when actually we’re connecting with another’s emotions, and feeding that, instead of connecting on a much deeper level, from who we really are. Connecting with others means connecting with ourselves, first, and it doesn’t have to include an exchange of words.
When we are open and true with ourselves connected to our inner-heart then this is from where we meet another.
Observing people in meetings it is interesting to see when someone speaks from their mind (usually needing recognition) and when someone speaks from their heart. Speaking from our hearts helps to melt all defences and we are reminded that in truth we are all the same.
“is that having been mind driven for a long time takes a toll on your body and can leave it quite empty and vacated.” I think this is why we choose to live in the mind so much as we dont want to feel how empty and vacated the body feels. Oh the irony.
There is no true intelligence in the mind if it leaves the body out, but the mind in connection with the inner heart is what is called whole body intelligence, the whole being operating as one unit, instead of parts.
The power of the mind with the heart is the true support that we can offer one another. Using our skills and qualities to the fullest when we are impulsed with love.
So many of us are guilty of using our minds to keep people out, we think it is helping but its quite the opposite – as soon as we go into our mind we are never not getting the true picture of whats going on.
I too have used my mind to keep others at bay and never really getting to know the true me but now enjoying embracing living in a heart-full way and sharing this with others.
I can feel this in myself and have seen it in other people too. Sounding like you know what you are talking about and you are on top of everything is a great way to keep people at bay. It says, ‘I am fine and I don’t want to let you any deeper into my heart’.
The mind will always be cold and calculating if not first impulsed by the inner heart.
The mind will always be cold and calculating if it is not first impulsed by the inner heart.
Letting the mind and past hurtful experiences run our body keeps us closed off to the innate offerings of evolution. We all have a potential that is simply waiting to be accessed, lived and constantly expanded. Only through our heart can our potential become our guide in life.
People use all sorts of things to protect themselves… Their eyes, the words, the energy… And actually it does take so much energy to protect ourselves in all of these ways
Yes it tenses the body, closes ones awareness and sets one on a course of a multitude of health issues, let alone the reality of harming another by offering a wary body instead of an open welcoming understanding presence.
Its crazy all the millions of ways we can protect ourselves from real love, who would have thought the very thing we say we all want is the very thing we often push away.
‘…having been mind driven for a long time takes a toll on your body and can leave it quite empty and vacated.’ I have felt the same, Matts. Having used my mind to escape the intensity of life I realise its only created an intensity in my body, that has left it feeling depleted, stressed with an activated, buzzed nervous system. Staying connected to the body is a whole other ball game to living life.
Being present and in our body is far more intelligent and so much better for our health and wellbeing. I have heard this so much in working with people who have experienced trauma. When you leave your body in a trauma and are not encouraged to feel safe in your body afterwards there is a much greater propensity to PTSD.
Fear of showing imperfections and making mistakes is often the thing that is holding us back from opening up to people and letting ourselves be truly seen. Yet it is so lovely to let this go and there is a beauty in just being transparent and being with others all the time when you do great things or make mistakes. it is really about the quality of how we live all the time that will determine how we feel each day.
There can be no intelligence at all if the body is left in a mess. Care and love bring back to the body order and harmony and soon greater awareness and appreciation follows.
Developing a loving relationship with ourselves that emanates from our heart we open up our connection to others.
The mind always seeks, the hearts simply knows.
Beautifully encapsulating how the mind looks outward for confirmation but the heart is settled in its inner knowing.
I would even say, the present you get at a birthday party that is beautifully wrapped in paper, looks amazing, keeps you excited and busy to find out what is in there to then realise when you open it, that there is nothing in it.
The mind always seeks self-gratification and with every effort and lie will drive the body to get it, yet the heart simply pulses to reflect the truth of all that is already there to live. When we are in connection to our inner-heart, we are in connection to love, and life from this point is lived with greater ease and honouring.
“The mind doesn’t nurture the body but the heart definitely does”. This has been such a huge understanding for me and one that has changed my life in many ways. I have come to see so clearly that my mind is a trickster and what it was continuing to tell me was definitely never in my best interests. In stark contrast my heart and my body work together in the most loving way and every message is I receive from them is honouring the beautiful being that I am.
Yes I recognize this Matts, great and honest writing.. I discovered also that I thought I was living from my heart a lot but actually do live inside my mind more that I thought I did. And that leaves you lonely in the end, no matter how many people you see or meet.
It is the arrogance we carry as a spirit that just care for its manifestation with no interest in the damage it brings to the body.
Indeed true intelligence is to live from our heart full in the body, a whole way to re discover.
I can see how much I’ve used my own mind as a protection, an escape and a buffer. This understanding makes it easier for me to understand others who use their knowledge based intellect to shut out the rest of the world.