What is it about food that keeps us coming back, already full, feeling content and satisfied and yet, in creeps that little voice saying, “You need to eat, you are hungry.” Why is it that we cannot avoid, ignore, stop, slow down or simply satisfy that little voice that keeps telling us we are hungry and still feel the need to eat, no matter how uncomfortable, full, heavy, tired or lethargic that last unnecessary mouthful may make us feel?
Don’t get me wrong… I am not saying we do not need to eat. I am simply suggesting that possibly we eat more than what we actually need, and that there could be an underlying reason why we eat as much as often as we do.
Perhaps there are issues, feelings, emotions that we feel, observe or see around and within us that we simply do not want to feel. Or could it be that we feel so amazing that we cannot handle just how awesome we are, so we instead opt to take the edge off, dulling ourselves just enough that we no longer feel that which we are possibly trying to avoid?
Food for me has been used in many ways: yes the obvious, we need to eat to survive, but I know for absolute certainty that I eat much more than I actually need. More often than not, it is at times where I am avoiding wanting to feel something that is going on around me – a situation, confrontation or emotion that I just do not want to deal with – so a snack is a great way to take my mind off it. Or that life is going so incredibly well, I am feeling so amazing, that rather than allow myself to truly appreciate and observe this, I dive into some roasted almonds, make some nut butter or decide to do some baking so I can lick the bowl. Better yet, cook a whole heap of food so it keeps me so busy that I totally forget what I am trying to avoid or ignore in the first place.
Again, don’t get me wrong, cooking is a lot of fun; I love it and I love to cook and share meals with others, but it can be something I choose to use as a distraction, rather than something that is done to support, nurture and nourish me.
Whatever the reason, you name it – food has it covered: it is so often our go to, all rounder, good-for-every-occasion best friend and companion. Not to mention conversation piece.
So why is food such a touchy subject? Why is it that everyone at one time or another uses food as a go to, a comforting agent? Yet to truly admit we have addictions with and towards food (well, there is your touchy subject!) is something we avoid looking at. I know I have in the past!
To really go there and look at the how, why and what we eat can be very exposing and bring up a lot, especially when we need to eat to survive. So how crazy is it to question our eating patterns, really? Though I’m beginning to ask, how crazy is it to not question them?
So, I am doing just that. I am questioning the ‘how,’ ‘why,’ ‘what’ and ‘when’ of eating. Yes, it is uncomfortable, and at times I really would rather not go there. Since really getting to the nitty gritty of it, boy oh boy, have those old eating habits wanted to march back in. As soon as I even attempt to avoid something or not appreciate anything, in comes the voice, a Jiminy Cricket you could say, chanting, “Go on, eat it!”
So the challenge begins when my body feels amazing, light, vital – and in comes the avoidance, the tension of, “Oh no! Life! I have to deal with all of this,” or “I cannot be this amazing,” – and the little voice says “Quick! Grab some food or better yet, even though you already cannot breathe after a huge meal, go back and have a second serve.”
It’s crazy that, even though we can be so uncomfortable that our body is screaming, “No more, you need to fast for a week after that outburst,” the tension is so great we often override it and lash out time and time again, each time saying, “Never again.”
Food and alcohol, – are they really any different, or is it that we see food as a necessity and therefore dare not question it? Could the drive behind how, why, and what we eat actually be coming from a thought, a mindset that is not actually our own?
Do we avoid ourselves so much that filling ourselves up with food is a better option than allowing ourselves to truly feel just how amazing we are? I am understanding that it does not matter what anyone else thinks of us; it is what and how we feel about ourselves that matters most.
To love, appreciate and accept ourselves in full, not needing food to fill the gap of why we do not choose to fill for ourselves first with our own love and appreciation.
By Nicole Serafin, Age 45yrs, Tintenbar, NSW
Further Reading:
Food Choices – From Eating for Taste to Eating to Nourish
Self-Care and My Inbuilt Automatic Feedback Loop
Zombie Way of Life
618 Comments
Why is it when we feel exquisite, divine and yummy all at the same time we then want to sabotage the feeling? Why is it we sabotage these feelings, is it because we don’t think they will last or if we sabotage them ourselves then no one else can crush them because we have already done it. Or, that it’s not safe to have these amazing feelings about ourselves? I know someone who can sustain those feeling of absolute love for themselves and all others in the face of such adversity and like a moth to a flame, I am also drawn to the light that is the universe as I know instinctively that I am also that light but choosing to withhold it from my self and all others for fear of retribution.
“can be something I choose to use as a distraction, rather than something that is done to support, nurture and nourish me.” I can relate to this myself with using eating as a distraction away from what I am really feeling. It’s inspired me to use those moments to simply stop and feel, thank you.
Using food as a substitute for feeling the fullness of who we are can lead to a feeling that we are less and so crave to eat some more!
Appreciation of our essences is a key to keeping our spirit, who is that mindset that is not actually ours, so when we appreciate our essence it is simple to not indulge and thus bloat and the ensuing lethargy.
It certainly helps to appreciate our essence to ensure we don’t indulge, but there are times when the spirit gets the upper hand and the impulse to do so can’t be denied. In such cases I have allowed the indulgence and in each case my body clearly tells me when I have had enough. The momentum of self love and nurture I have developed kicks in and there is a much firmer foundation for saying no the next time that impulse is felt, especially when I have allowed myself to feel the ill consequences in my body and how that pushes against the love that I have lived and want to continue to grow.
Years ago I used to feel this awful stabbing pain in my stomach in the morning and eating something was the way to stop it. I’ve realised over time that the stabbing pain isn’t actually hunger but something I am feeling about life I haven’t wanted to accept. It comes up rarely now but it has been amazing to explore the pain and not eat and get underneath it to what it’s actually trying to say to me.
I’m very aware right now that I would love to eat my way out of how I’m feeling but I am equally aware that I can’t, not because I don’t have access to food but because there is no food or quantity of food that will take away my discomfort. The only way to permanently address my discomfort is to transmute it and although at this stage I’m not totally sure how to go about doing this, I do know that the transmutation process is an internal one.
Lately because I have felt quite tired I have been using sugary foods to get me through the day nothing artificial but sugary all the same.
A more honest approach would be for me to stop the sugar, let myself feel how tired I am and actually rest!
I appreciate your honesty LE most of us are so caught up in the rush of doing, that we do gravitate towards sugar as a false pick me up. Rather than just saying I’m tried and need to rest.
When I feel a strong sense of purpose it’s easy to know what food feels true to eat when I dont have purpose my eating can go to pot.
I can use food to support me or I can use food to numb me, it is always my choice and always has it after effects – good or bad.
I agree Nicole, many of us definitely eat more than we really need, whether it is wanting a treat, something for comfort, an after dinner ‘something sweet’, the list goes on, ‘I am simply suggesting that possibly we eat more than what we actually need, and that there could be an underlying reason why we eat as much as often as we do.’
“To really go there and look at the how, why and what we eat can be very exposing and bring up a lot, ” I agree. It’s never just about the food but what do we feel and how are we moving before that desire for a little something enters?
Especially with stimulating food cooked with some form of sugar with a high or low GI, it feels like we want more and more. I took sugar as an exemple because I have a sweet tooth myself. The hard bit is to feel the consequences afterwards, feeling tired or fuzzy, not quite together.
I know that fuzzy feeling, the fatigue with underlying raciness too… it makes sense to question why it is what we do.
It seems that no matter how much we give into our cravings and the desire for more, we simply cannot numb out what it is that we do not want to feel.
Rachel I agree it’s like using alcohol to take the edge off the day or as a reward for getting through the day. we also use alcohol as a drug of choice to ‘drown our sorrows’ and yes alcohol does do that on a temporary basis but the next day we wake up feeling ghastly and the sorrow we were trying to drown is still there unresolved so using alcohol doesn’t work either.
To look at the world’s relationship with food and how we use it is pretty meek. The second we use food to fill a hole we are rejecting the fact that food can nourish our bodies.
I used to buy into the belief that the more that we eat of a food that is ‘good’ for us then the better it is. I used to pack as much fruit and veg into my day as possible thinking that I was consuming massive amounts of nutrients. The fact that I had an almost permanently distended belly seemed to escape me completely. The interesting thing is that I don’t eat much at all any more, my body simply doesn’t want that much to eat but when I go to have my regular blood tests my results indicate that I am very healthy and yet previously I would have been convinced that I wouldn’t have been getting enough nutrients.
I often over eat in the evenings because if I do that I will wake up with less clarity and awareness which I know I resist feeling.
‘Why is it that everyone at one time or another uses food as a go to, a comforting agent?’ This is universal and something, I think we can all relate to.
‘One time or another’ !!! I would say that most of us use food as a ‘go to or comforting agent’ constantly throughout the majority of our lives, it is how we have been taught and modelled to use food. We mark pretty much everything in our lives with overeating, weddings, birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas etc and in between times we simply over eat out of pure habit.
Do we avoid ourselves so much that filling ourselves up with food is a better option than allowing ourselves to truly feel just how amazing we are? Yes, there are days I feel super amazing and light, and then will eat something to dull this amazingness, mmm… what would happen if I didn’t eat to dull?
I can so relate to this too. It feels crazy to feel so amazing and then to calculate and dull myself with food in order to not be aware and feel awesome again. As western nations are overeating – hence the obesity crisis – are we not wanting to feel our magnificence and also to not feel deeply where the world is at?
I agree Nicole, many of us definitely eat more than we really need, whether it is wanting a treat, something for comfort, an after dinner ‘something sweet’, the list goes on, ‘I am simply suggesting that possibly we eat more than what we actually need, and that there could be an underlying reason why we eat as much as often as we do.’
It would be very interesting to see and feel what unfolded if you and more of us chose not to eat to dull, ‘Or could it be that we feel so amazing that we cannot handle just how awesome we are, so we instead opt to take the edge off, dulling ourselves just enough that we no longer feel that which we are possibly trying to avoid?’
Jacqueline what a great question to ask
“why do we avoid ourselves so much that filling ourselves up with food is a better option than allowing ourselves to truly feel just how amazing we are?”
Is it possible that there is an energy that is in control of our bodies, that will go to any lengths to stop us from feeling the amazingness we truly are. We ‘think’ we are in control but who is doing the ‘thinking’
I am feeling more and more how I eat to not feel the tension that I feel. What I appreciate is the more I am feeling this the more I am aware of what is going on and getting to the point I can no longer live this way #movingforward #evolution ✨
‘So the challenge begins when my body feels amazing, light, vital – and in comes the avoidance, the tension of, “Oh no! Life! I have to deal with all of this,” or “I cannot be this amazing,” – and the little voice says “Quick! Grab some food or better yet, even though you already cannot breathe after a huge meal, go back and have a second serve.’
I can relate to all of this, and it still happens, but the more I focus on being present in my body, the less that little voice from my head influences.
The more I appreciate myself and allow myself just to be me, the easier it becomes to choose food products that are lighter on my digestive system, heal and truly support and nourish my body, without perfection, as now and again I still like go have something that is naturally sweet.
What we think of ourselves is definitely what matters most because if your truly feel your essence anyone could say whatever they want negatively and it would just roll off you. This is an important step in living for love and truth when the world is full of lies.
Food is a very interesting barometer for how I am feeling, and it seems to have less impact than it did previously even if I am sabortaging the essence of me shines through which is pretty awesome.
Nicole, this really makes sense and it sure feels more true and nurturing to fill ourselves with love and acceptance rather than with food; ‘To love, appreciate and accept ourselves in full, not needing food to fill the gap of why we do not choose to fill for ourselves first with our own love and appreciation.’
Nicole, this is a great thing to do; ‘ I am questioning the ‘how,’ ‘why,’ ‘what’ and ‘when’ of eating.’ I really overate yesterday and I noticed that the more I overeat the more I want to continue to overeat and then I ate foods that were not at all supportive for my body and as a result I felt bloated and lethargic. So there is definitely something going on because my body does not need all of this food. Great to look at the why with all of this.
Food is NEVER the issue. Yes it is a reality but it is a million miles after a choice we have already made prior that builds up a momentum that guarantees the quality of vibration in our food that we then choose.
I agree Joshua that food itself is not the issue. Food is the same as anything that we use to distract, numb or bludgeon ourselves, it is the hammer if you want that we use to hit ourselves over the head with but what caused us to pick up the hammer in the first place happened way back down the track.
I keep getting the message that it’s my relationship with what I feel is what needs to be looked at rather than the food itself. An outplay that reflects what’s happening within me.
My husband used to say he knew something was wrong if I would cook all day. It is true that I used it as a distraction and comfort, rather than being okay with what was coming up to look at.
I can eat more than I need to at times and when I do it, I can not feel as much, I dull myself a bit…what is foods purpose…first and foremost nourishment. Honesty about how it feels in the body tells us what we need to know about how much and what to eat…no diet plan needed. My food continues to change and modify as I change and grow. No rules here but learning to be responsive.
Through attending presentations by Universal Medicine has supported me in having more awareness of old patterns around food – to numb out to not feel old hurts or accepting the truth of the amazing Universal beings we all are.
I was talking to someone today about how we both used to secret eat in our cars and hide the evidence. It goes to show how we can totally destroy our bodies but not want to come clean about it so we don’t have to take responsibility for the state of our bodies.
I know what you mean hm. Or perhaps we’re the ones who sneak down in the middle of the night to raid the fridge. Hilarious! An example of games we play at our own expense. In this way we deny the existence of our true and divine self, the forever present observer to whom there are no secrets.
We become what we eat, and the way that we eat. We now have a multimillion dollar industry around food and diet that does not truly serve anyone, when we can be super practical, use common sense and listen to what our body’s needs truly are, but, and more importantly we can ask why do we still consume the poisons the we call ‘food’ that we know pollutes our system? Where is the Love in that?
Personally, I always feel more vital on a smaller portion of food. It was no different than when I was a child as I never wanted to eat much but was criticised from extended members of my family for eating like a bird. It’s easy to see why we have this unhealthy relationship with food when people eat more than their body needs.
When we appreciate ourselves and appreciate the food we are blessed with it is hard to then abuse it. And, what we often lack in our society is appreciation and a willingness to listen to our body’s wisdom.
“Oh no! Life! I have to deal with all of this,” – I can very much relate to this sentence when the overwhelm sets in and I just want to distract myself with food instead of choosing to commit to what is being offered to me. I know I am more than equipped to deal with it so why choose food or in truth allow the energy to come that forces me go for food over love and acceptance of what is going on within myself?
I’m more clearly seeing the game that is played between me and food. The grander I feel inside the more I want to eat to dull – until such point where I make the grandness everything – and then the food has no place.