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Everyday Livingness
Death & Dying, Social Issues 767 Comments on My Dad’s Passing – I Knew That It Was Not Him

My Dad’s Passing – I Knew That It Was Not Him

By Anne Hishon · On December 1, 2015 ·Photography by Leonne Sharkey

Recently my dad passed away and I was able to spend the last two days of his life with him. In the hours before he died I could feel him leaving his body and when he died I remember feeling that dad’s body was not Him.

We took dad home for 3 days before the funeral and he lay in his coffin in the lounge of our family home. Many visitors and family came to see him and shared stories about his life. Often I would go and stand by his coffin and I knew that it was not Him.

When we were in the church and his coffin was centre stage and family shared memories about dad I remember looking at the coffin and I knew that what it contained was not Him.

At the graveside as we all stood around and talked about dad, the coffin was lowered into the ground and I definitely knew that it was not Him.

And now a few weeks later, as I visually try and hold onto my dad, I can feel the very strong attachment we have to the physical body and what it looks like and how this imprint is often what we hold onto in our heads and in the photos we keep and look at.

Yet dad’s body was the vessel which housed his soul (life force or his essence), and this body after death has no purpose anymore.

What I was feeling after he died was the departure of his soul from his body and I knew that without his soul, the body was not Him and was no longer needed.

When I connect with the soul of my dad I remember his hugs whenever I was leaving and that special kiss on the cheek. Dad was not an overly physically affectionate man, but when he hugged, I knew it was from Him.

When I connect to the soul of my dad I can feel the love he had for his family, not always shown in traditional ways, but it was felt by us all and we knew it was from Him.

When I connect to the soul of my dad I shed a tear as my mum reads some quotations from the heart, which she found in a drawer in his writing desk, and we know they are from Him.

For most of my life I have been told about the finality of death and that we go to heaven or hell. It has never felt true to me and I have never believed this explanation.

Serge Benhayon has presented death as a ‘passing over’, where our soul eventually comes back again into another physical body to live another lifetime. Our spirit is on a journey through many lives learning the lessons we need to learn on our journey back to be united with God. This makes so much sense to me, as I cannot believe that our life here has no purpose except a beginning and an end.

In my observations of my dad’s death I could feel the absence of “Him” in his body and know that this life was only a small part of his journey on his way back to God.

Published with permission of my Mum.

By Anne Hishon, Registered Nurse, Tauranga, New Zealand

Further Reading:

The Kingly Body – Building a Connection With Your Soul
Reincarnation: Does Everything Start and End?
My Mum’s Funeral: Celebration of a Life Completed

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Anne Hishon

Living in New Zealand with my gorgeous husband and 2 boys is pretty awesome. During the day I connect with lots of older people in the community in my job as a nurse and I am very lucky to work with a great team of supportive women. I enjoy walks with my family and our dog Leo, and in our hunt for dog friendly parks and walkways, we are constantly reminded of the beautiful place in which we live.

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767 Comments

  • Mary Adler says: September 11, 2020 at 1:36 pm

    “this life was only a small part of his journey on his way back to God.” This understanding is the answer to ‘Why are we here?’

    Reply
  • Mary says: January 23, 2020 at 3:54 pm

    Too me Anne you have raised the biggest trap we as human- beings have made for ourselves and to be honest I’m just discovering for myself that we are energy first before we are a physical body. This is hard for me and I guess for most people to really get their head around.
    We have not been educated to see energy first we have been positively encouraged to only see the physicality.
    I met a child recently that sees energy first, I didn’t speak to this child but I could sense they were reading me energetically. Then I had a sad feeling sweep over my body as I realised that as a child I could read energy too, it was as natural to me as breathing. When we are babies we sense our surroundings, we cannot do very much but we do sense everything. We know exactly what is going on within the family unit we are born into. As we grow up we put aside this most amazing innate ability to sense as it is actively discouraged within the family and definitely at school. This is all done with a deliberate intention so that we do not access our 6th sense because if we do have access we will discover that there is so much more to us than we could ever imagine. Now I understand why we eat and drink and behave in such ways that we do, it is all to avoid feeling just how sensitive we all are we cannot stop feeling so we dull ourselves so much it enables us to lessen what we can feel.

    Reply
  • Greg Barnes says: April 29, 2019 at 5:29 am

    Thank you Anne, as we let go of our old beliefs about death and the dying process and start to get an understanding of how we pass-over. So we start to live life in a different way, and we understand to undertake responsibility for staying connected to that soul-full essence until our last breath, as this is super important to how we reincarnate.

    Reply
  • Rachel Murtagh says: January 8, 2019 at 11:43 pm

    I felt that at my grandmother’s funeral that she wasn’t her body. To make this realisation at her death and reading your blog brings to my attention how much we relate to others because of their physical appearance and their body; not what innately lies inside the body. I think if we let go of our attachment to all outward appearances, letting go of our loved ones would be a celebratory affair, not the griefstricken time we make it to be.

    Reply
  • Alison Valentine says: January 8, 2019 at 7:42 am

    When you see someone who has died you can feel that their body is an empty vessel and the essence of the person is no longer there. I wonder if we understood re-incarnation and accepted it as a possibility, then we would not be so attached to the body after death, knowing that our existing body has no significance in our return.

    Reply
  • Helen Elliott says: December 17, 2018 at 6:56 am

    When we connect with another it is our souls connecting which is why we can sometimes go long periods of time without physically seeing someone without it making a difference to the relationship. The attachment we have to another’s physicality and the loss we feel when they pass over exposes how we can still be caught in the myths around what makes us who we are despite so many having had the experience of clearly sensing when the soul leaves the body and how it is then just an empty vessel.

    Reply
  • Lorraine says: November 27, 2018 at 5:15 am

    A beautiful sharing re your dad passing thank you Anne.

    Reply
  • Shami says: November 21, 2018 at 7:45 am

    The way that Serge Benhayon presents about passing over, and the journey of the spirit is something which I have always found very inspiring because of how it gives purpose to life.

    Reply
    • Lorraine says: January 6, 2019 at 6:14 am

      Yes, bringing purpose to life is key, and I too love how Serge Benhayon presents about the whole area of passing over.

      Reply
  • Mary Adler says: November 12, 2018 at 11:25 pm

    Understanding reincarnation makes sense of why we are here in that our body is just here to enhouse our spirit life after life as we learn from our experiences in life to evolve back to the glory of Heaven where we came from.

    Reply
    • Elaine says: January 3, 2019 at 1:57 am

      I feel the same Mary and that we are here back on Earth may times over to allow our personality and spirit the healing that is needed – the making whole of the spirit to soul

      Reply
  • Lieke Campbell says: November 5, 2018 at 6:18 am

    So we are actually not our body but a Soul and spirit that live beyond the life of the physical body.

    Reply
  • Shami says: October 12, 2018 at 7:47 am

    It is a sad experience, when our parents pass over. But how you have written about it here is very positive and encouraging that there can be another way that is actually quite lovely.

    Reply
  • Sam says: September 29, 2018 at 5:09 am

    It is one of the biggest lies in history that we either go to heaven or hell, no wonder we have so many people who say they don’t believe in anything.
    If the truth be known as you so express here we would all be more in wonder of life rather then trying to dull the pain.
    Being unaware of the fact that we are immortal is a heavy burden to carry.

    Reply
  • Elizabeth McCann says: September 8, 2018 at 4:33 pm

    Seeing death as the passing from one cycle to another supports us in understanding that we are forever on an evolutionary journey, and that the body we leave behind was simply an envelope which en-housed our essence, but was not our essence. Thank you Anne, your sharing has given me much to ponder on.

    Reply
  • Jill Steiner says: June 19, 2018 at 3:39 am

    I had a similar experience when a close friend passed over, even before the last breath was taken I felt that the spirit had left already, to continue its journey, the body that I was looking at was like and old coat, no longer needed, being able to be discarded.

    Reply
  • greg Barnes says: June 10, 2018 at 5:28 am

    When we have had completion with another and they pass-over then we will not have any regrets for everything has already been said.

    Reply
  • Karin says: May 30, 2018 at 7:04 am

    Many years ago, when my granddad died, I was asked if I wanted to see him in the funeral palor. I’d never seen a dead body and was unsure. Some people were nervous I would be upset with seeing him and they themselves had decided to not see him because they preferred to remember him being alive. I did opt for seeing him and I was very glad I did because I could feel this was just a physical body and he was no longer around which helped me let him go. I wasn’t particularly understanding of what happens when we die but I felt that it wasn’t until a few days later that I felt he was really no longer with us. It’s wonderful to be able to talk about these things.

    Reply
  • Danna Elmalah says: May 13, 2018 at 6:36 am

    Thank you Anne, for expressing what you have experienced and how it felt. For us to learn from this by every word and action. For it shows us that there is a deeper part of us that knows about this return and passing over. There is no such thing as non-existing. As we are. And we will continue to life by lives until we fully live love again, together, not separative.

    Reply
  • MW says: May 10, 2018 at 6:30 am

    A beautiful sharing and inner knowing that we are always connected

    Reply
  • Ruth Ketnor says: April 27, 2018 at 5:12 pm

    I was with my Dad 18 months ago when he passed. I watched and sensed him leave his body and his body became a shell, it was not him, he had moved on. Great blog thank you Anne.

    Reply
  • Gabriele Conrad says: April 20, 2018 at 8:23 pm

    Death is definitely not the end and birth is not the beginning. We are much bigger than a mere lifetime in a physical body.

    Reply
  • Carola Woods says: March 30, 2018 at 7:03 am

    The tragedy of only living a human life is that we miss the depth of connection our Soul offers of the eternal oneness that we are from, and will continue to be in a cycle within this life, the next and so on, until we all return to knowing that it is all about the quality space that we are here for and not time.

    Reply
  • chris james says: March 16, 2018 at 12:19 am

    It is so important that humanity learns the truth of reincarnation, that people know with a surety what is actually happening in life, death, and rebirth. This is the game changer.

    Reply
  • Leigh Matson says: March 10, 2018 at 2:46 am

    Death has a way of showing us that we are more than human, I remember feeling the same when my nan died. It wasn’t her anymore. Likewise this otherworldly part of us can be seen changing when using substances or reactions. Even having phrases like “your not yourself” or “whats gotten into you” shows that we know we are more than the body that enhouses another aspect of us.

    Reply
  • Michael Goodhart says: February 21, 2018 at 2:01 pm

    I love the observed science of this blog Anne, and I remember seeing a dead body for the first time when my grandfather passed away and feeling the same thing. It was like I was looking at someone’s jacket they left in a coffin- the way his body was just a shell to hold his soul during his life, and could almost feel how he just slipped it off when he died. I felt the same after seeing my grandmother’s dead body as well. Great blog Anne!

    Reply
  • jennym says: February 7, 2018 at 6:15 pm

    Being able to feel the difference of things by the felt sense, can allow us to feel the truth of life.

    Reply
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