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Sexism, Social Issues 324 Comments on To Welcome Baby Boy

To Welcome Baby Boy

By Coleen Hensey · On September 10, 2017 ·Photography by Nico van Haastrecht

A little over 2000 years ago, a baby boy was born. One version of his story presents how this baby boy, in spite of his humble birth, was visited by a host of people all bearing him gifts: Wise Men, shepherds, possibly even angels. The shepherds brought lambs, the angels, their adoration and the Wise Men brought gold, frankincense and myrrh.

Perhaps a more philosophical reading of the latter gesture indicates a greater significance in its symbolic meaning – a conferring upon the baby of the potential for, or confirmation of, his own inner connection to Love, Wisdom and Divine Intelligence.

Either way we look at it, this baby boy was celebrated at his birth in a way that befits the birth of a Son of God and was feted with the qualities one would rightly assign to such a being. This baby boy later lived and shared these qualities with the world and eventually his life became the cornerstone of one of the current institutionalised religions in our world, Christianity, named after Jesus the Christ.

Notwithstanding that several interpretations have been overlaid upon the life of Jesus over the years, it can assuredly be said that his life did fulfil the promise of those ‘gifts’ conferred upon him, or confirmed as being within him at his birth.

In our current times, 353,000 babies are born each and every day, with a little over half of these babies being boys (1). Hence, there are over 176,500 baby boys born daily. This equates to over 65 million baby boys born every single year.

It is surely worth considering what physical gifts and/or qualities we bring to them. How do we welcome them into this world? What are the first imprints they receive, not just from their immediate, close family, but from all of us?

In the more affluent societies, most if not all babies are ‘showered’ with physical gifts – toys, nappies, engraved cups and spoons, greetings cards to welcome the new baby and for boys, largely blue items of clothing. These baby boys seem to ‘have it all’ when compared to their peers in less affluent countries, who are born into poverty, sickness, war and conflict. On one level they are most certainly more fortunate. However, what energy precisely comes with these packages of ‘blue’ based gifts, qualities, beliefs and expectations? In what quality of energy do we collectively welcome baby boys into this world?

Based on personal experience and observation, what I see is that from the moment the baby takes his first physical breath, the process of imprinting involves the imposition of some very weighty ideals, beliefs and pictures, which severely reduce and restrict his innate expression.

As a child is born, there is a moment of absolute grace where those present behold the new life in a genuine sense of awe and wonder.

Shortly thereafter, he is also greeted by the often heavy expectations of his immediate and extended family, who are themselves the subjects of the same societally dictated concepts about what it is to be a boy and what it is to be a man; concepts that are then projected onto the physically vulnerable, newborn baby.

The first conversations are often about the baby’s physicality. Does he have long legs? He’s going to be a runner. Is his build more stocky? A lifetime of rugby ahead for him! Does he clench his fists? Likely to be a boxer. It is not uncommon for families to drape their newborns in the colours of their favourite sporting team from the moment of birth. Others discuss and anticipate what career the child will take up later in life – will he be a carpenter, a doctor, a musician, an entrepreneur who will uphold the family name, make money, be a success? Much of this occurs as the child sleeps and ostensibly without any awareness on the part of the extended family of how it affects him, for good or for ill.

In some hospitals there is an anecdotal saying that when there are more boys born than girls, it presages the advent of war. Globally, there are always more boys than girls born – the ratio is 105:100 (2) Are we then implying that we are always going to be at war and do such beliefs endorse the tough, competitive, even aggressive image of what it means to be a man?

Such impositions are everywhere. I once mentioned to a friend that her newborn was distressed by the noise and the energy of the TV. Her reply was that she had observed the same thing, mentioned it to the medical staff and was advised that the baby, who was a week old, needed to get used to it.

Part of the mix can also be the emotional needs of the mother. I have often heard mums refer to their newborn sons as ‘my little man,’ and observed how the baby can at times be assigned the role of fulfilling mum’s need to feel needed.

Do any of these imprints support the baby boy to connect with what he innately is? Or do they undermine it?

Is it possible that the baby boy born a little over 2000 years ago came into a family who themselves lived in a way that honoured the qualities of tenderness, inner connection, Soul, Love, Wisdom and Divine Intelligence? Did his teachers, elders and other members of his community also live thus and so nurtured the baby boy to unfold his divine potential, clearing the path for him so that he knew how to clear the path for so many others?

We are none of us born into a vacuum and naturally look to others to reflect and to confirm who we are. Especially as children, as newborns, we need to be nurtured in a manner that supports our unfolding development of our inner qualities. However, is it the case that we can only do this for our baby boys, for all of our children, once we have offered to, and unfolded this, for ourselves?

Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves?

Do we need to be Soul-connected ourselves to truly welcome a Soul-connected being coming into the physical body in a way that confirms its absolute divinity? I feel that we do and that it is only then that we can move on from imposing our collectively held ideals, pictures, concepts and beliefs to expressing a true welcome from the inner-heart like:

Dear little child of mine

May the rays of Heaven shine

May you know just how Divine

All the wonders you bring to our lives

As you live and as you grow

May you forever always know

How grand and special you are

Bright as the light of a star

Dear little child of mine.  

(Michael Benhayon GM Records)

Does not every child, every baby boy, deserve to be welcomed in this way, honoured in the simplicity of all that he is? And is this the only gift he truly ever needs, confirmed and lived daily by all those around him?

Permission from Michael Benhayon for the use of the Little Child of Mine lyric at the end of this blog.

By Coleen Hensey

References:

  1. How Many Babies Are Born Each Day? (n.d.). Retrieved August 04, 2017, from http://www.theworldcounts.com/stories/How-Many-Babies-Are-Born-Each-Day
  2. Sex Ratio. (n.d.). Retrieved August 04, 2017, from http://www.searo.who.int/entity/health_situation_trends/data/chi/sex-ratio/en/

Further Reading:
“Boys will be Boys”…I Don’t Think So
Men – Are we set up to fail?
Real men don’t cry

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Coleen Hensey

I love children of all ages from 1 to 100, nature, animals, fun and music and get to enjoy all of these in the mountains of Queensland, Australia. Working with children teaches me new things every day. Often caught singing and dancing in local supermarkets.

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324 Comments

  • Mary Adler says: December 28, 2019 at 4:19 pm

    Loving and cherishing ourselves for who we are inspires us to love and cherish all others equally.

    Reply
  • Greg Barnes says: July 27, 2019 at 5:55 am

    What a great Blog Colleen, as we can all react to what is going on in the world, and we also have the opportunity to make more Loving choices to deliver our-selves from the controlling fear mongering institutions that want to belittle our essences.

    Reply
  • Lorraine Wellman says: February 10, 2019 at 9:23 pm

    It is important to reflect on what quality of energy do we welcome baby boys, and girls, into the world, ‘Does the quality of our welcome for our newborns reside within the quality we live and hold for ourselves, how we cherish and truly value ourselves?’

    Reply
  • Brigette Evans says: December 31, 2018 at 6:25 pm

    What a gorgeous and much needed blog, Coleen. As I reflect on its content, although for the most part I did not raise my son in such all-encompassing, unimposing ways, I know that it is never too late to start. As I am re-raising myself with the honouring and simplicity of all that I am so too am I embracing my son equally.

    Reply
  • Elaine Arthey says: November 6, 2018 at 7:18 am

    What beautiful lyrics by Michael Benhayon… to let our children know this from a tender age right on through adulthood and to hold them in love no matter what – to take responsibility for the energy we take on and to keep coming back to the truth and letting them see a reflection of what is possible – that is what supports them growing up – our unwavering love and integrity.

    Reply
    • Lorraine says: February 10, 2019 at 9:20 pm

      Yes, I love this song from Michael Benhayon, very beautiful.

      Reply
  • Sarah Flenley says: October 29, 2018 at 5:44 am

    To be brought up in the knowing you are a divine being, and to be cherished for those qualities – that is our future.

    Reply
  • Helen Elliott says: October 10, 2018 at 5:26 pm

    Thank you Coleen feeling the responsibility we all have for the quality we choose to live in and how this is reflected to babies as they enter the world and are so often faced with suffocating ideals and beliefs that do not honour their innate tenderness.

    Reply
  • Alison Valentine says: September 30, 2018 at 5:30 am

    What you highlight Coleen is the enormous pressure we put our babies under, almost from the time they come out of the womb, to be what we want them to be. Babies are super sensitive to energy and they would feel this, so it must be quite imposing and possibly even crushing. This is why I love what Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon present, because with a greater aware of energy and our own behaviours we can start to bring our children without wanting them to be a certain way and therefore allowing them to be unencumbered and free to be themselves.

    Reply
  • fiona lotherington says: September 12, 2018 at 9:16 pm

    “I have often heard mums refer to their newborn sons as ‘my little man,’ and observed how the baby can at times be assigned the role of fulfilling mum’s need to feel needed”. I have seen this in other mums and myself. We impose a lot of need on our sons to be the man that other adult men have failed to be. This becomes a trade-off where mums get their emotional needs met and in exchange pander and compromise on their standards.

    Reply
  • HM says: August 26, 2018 at 10:17 pm

    Having just had a baby boy it is a joy to be surrounded by people who connect to the quality he brings and not his future roles. He is so very still, and this is what we are deeply appreciating at the moment, not what he does but who he is – a different way of bringing in babies into the world to support them in who they are first.

    Reply
  • Willem Plandsoen says: August 5, 2018 at 7:43 pm

    You are fully right here Coleen. We should honour our new borns in what they are, their divinity, and not burden them with beliefs and expectations from the start. But that can only be done by living this as parents ourselves.

    Reply
  • Sam says: July 13, 2018 at 6:07 am

    “As you live and as you grow

    May you forever always know

    How grand and special you are”
    Michael Benhayon

    Every child, every baby boy or girl deserves to be welcomed with such love, so so precious are our little ones – its our responsibility as adults to not impose but to allow them to be all they are.

    Reply
    • Chan Ly says: August 14, 2018 at 7:35 am

      Very beautifully expressed Sam. When I first heard this song by Michael Benhayon, I cried as I felt the same, that every child deserves to be welcomed with such love. But in reality, this is not the case. This song confirms how deeply precious we all are and every single one of us is worth celebrating.

      Reply
  • Elizabeth Dolan says: July 6, 2018 at 8:24 pm

    Cherish ourselves and we will be able to cherish every child that is born.

    Reply
    • Chan Ly says: August 14, 2018 at 7:39 am

      This is the key Elizabeth, and I agree, we must first cherish ourselves and then we are able to cherish every child and adult in our life. When one child in this world is not cherished or adored it impacts on us all and this highlights how deeply connected we all are. One action and one choice of one person actually affect the rest of humanity.

      Reply
  • chris james says: June 17, 2018 at 5:15 pm

    It is true, every child deserves the honouring, the love, that indeed surrounds us all at all times

    Reply
  • Ingrid Ward says: June 16, 2018 at 5:37 pm

    Just imagine if every child was sung the exquisite lyrics to this song over and over again as they grew. Life certainly would change immeasurably simply because every child was being honoured for the divine soul they are, the unique expression they are here to bring to the world and then supported to live it

    Reply
    • Chan Ly says: August 14, 2018 at 7:43 am

      I love this song Ingrid, when I listen to it I feel absolutely adored and loved for who I am. This song is for everyone and it is a blessing for humanity to have this easily available to us all.

      Reply
  • julie says: June 2, 2018 at 5:26 am

    We have all these ideals and beliefs of how to toughen up and make boys into strong men but in fact, the way we treat our boys only serves to make them weaker, not stronger. This is evident by the number of men that suicide each year as they are unable to cope with the expectations placed on them and are indeed very sensitive.

    Reply
  • Carola Woods says: May 11, 2018 at 5:31 am

    Beautiful Coleen and a powerful testament to the truth that in honoring the essence of who we are at birth (even before), a son of God no less, and foster this knowingness within every child as they develop and grow we would have living amongst us the Godliness that is rightfully there to live and be inspired to live more of. To empower a child to learn to live all that they multi-dimensionally are is to empower ourselves and all of humanity, as each child and each generation serve to continue to pull us up, to inspire us all evolve in order to live more of the divinity we are here to live.

    Reply
  • Annelies van Haastrecht says: April 12, 2018 at 9:37 pm

    If we meet every baby, boy or girl in the grandness that they are, knowing we are that too, how would the world look like?

    Reply
  • Joseph Barker says: March 20, 2018 at 8:30 am

    Beautiful Coleen – it’s like as men we need to ‘re-greet’ and know ourselves as delicate bundles of joy – otherwise we tend to develop a heap of protective behaviours and beliefs – that’s how sweet and precious we are.

    Reply
    • Helen Elliott says: October 10, 2018 at 5:28 pm

      This is so gorgeous Joseph and as women we need to reflect to men and boys that it is safe and so much needed to embrace their innate sweetness.

      Reply
  • Nico van Haastrecht says: March 3, 2018 at 3:17 pm

    When we allow our baby boys to unfold their inner qualities instead of learning them certain behaviours we think a boy or a man needs to have because it will help them to live in the harsh societies we live in, we are missing a very important thing. The thing that the delicacy and tenderness that is inherent in a boy or a man, when lived in full, has the power to make an end to all the harshness in society we try to protect then from.

    Reply
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